All Those Years Ago
by RealLuvAlways
Summary: You can't move on before you come to terms w/ the secrets that held you in place all those years ago. A tragic event forces Brooke and Haley to make rash decisions. At HS reunion Brooke comes clean retelling the journey and setting them all free. BL&NH!
1. The Time Comes

**All Those Years Ago**

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Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Summary: The story is written in two planes of time, and centers around the lives and relationships of Brooke and Haley. The premise of the story is that: "Sometimes, before you can know what lies ahead, you have to first come to terms with the secrets that bound you in place all those years ago." The story's present time, which is introduced in the prologue, picks up with B/H 5 years after the they would have graduated from High School. The story then flashes back to the characters senior year of HS, filling in the long forgotten memories of their journey... and setting them free.**

**Spoilers: Unlike in the show, Lucas does not join the Ravens basketball team until the summer before senior year. Therefore, the two opposite worlds of Tree Hill: Brooke-Peyton-Nathan and Haley-Lucas have not collided yet. Will they ever collide? Of course..."People who are meant to be together always find their way...in the end!"**

**Author's note: This is my first ever fanfic, so reviews are always welcome, and loved!**

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****Prologue: The Time Comes  
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…_**I wait for the day to break me**_

_**I look up to the sky**_

_**I look back on my life**_

_**I look back on the life that graced me**_

_**Gratefully…**_

It was early in Los Angeles, not even 5 o'clock. The sun was just barely peaking over the horizon as Brooke drove the all too familiar route to work. Today she decided to make a stop; she needed caffeine and she deserved a treat, so Starbucks it was. As she made her way up to the counter, to place her order, she couldn't help but notice how different LA was compared to where she had used to live. Here, other than the lone worker, she was the only person in the store. Back in New York, by this time, there would have already been a line of people waiting, all rushing frantically to get to work on time. She missed that.

_It's too early to be up here_, she thought, as she grabbed her Grande Mocha Frappachino and yawned.

_Way too early_, she groaned to herself. Then, noticing the curly haired blonde across the street, who was comically scrambling through her purse, she perked up.

_Ah! There are other people out this early. And hey, she's gotta be about my age…right?_

Brooke slowly kept walking to her car but she couldn't manage to keep her stare off the girl. As she got closer it became clear to see; the young woman was clearly barefoot, wearing only an oversized men's button down as a makeshift dress. Brooke observed her more intently. The girl was ironically somewhat graceful in her oblivion; she could dangle black high heels in one hand, balance her cell phone between her shoulder and chin as she talked, and still use her free hand to search within the oversized bag she carried. It was quite remarkable. After a few tumultuous moments, though, the woman raised her arm victoriously, keys in hand! It startled Brooke at first, but then she just laughed to herself, knowingly, as she looked away, replaying that image in her head as she drove off. Back on the road again, Brooke turned her radio up, slid the windows down, and got lost in the moment.

_I guess it's not too early …if you were out all night…and hadn't yet made it home yet!_ She thought, remembering the girl again. _Where has all the time gone? I used to be the one fishing for keys in my purse, stumbling home half drunk, half naked, half hung-over…taking the dreaded "walk of shame," and now, well…I wish I had that freedom._

That wasn't the case though, for Brooke the way she saw it…she had sold her freedom away a long time ago…to the devil, when she went into business with Victoria. She then felt the vibration of her cell phone between her legs, tearing her attention back to reality. On the screen it read: BITCHTORIA, in bold capital letters, sending a chill down the spine of the lovely brunette. Just seeing that name made her cringe because it forced her back into the moment, reliving last week's conversation with Bitchtoria, oops Victoria, her mother.

"_Darling, your days of wild and reckless nights…friends, guys and fun, they're gone, long gone, and they should be… say goodbye to that Brooke, pretend she never existed…I don't know how many more times I can tell you this without taking action…you, we…have far too much to lose!" _

She could hear those words in her head so perfectly, over and over…the last part especially. It haunted her. Her mother didn't know the half of what she had already given up, or lost, all those years ago.

By then Brooke had finally made it to Rodeo Drive, where her Clothes Over Bros store was located. She slipped in through the back door, set her keys down and sat alone at her desk. She started sifting through the previous day's mail, as she did every morning, but today there was something holding her back. The internal conflict within her had started to take its toll.

One half of Brooke, her mind, told her that Victoria was right. After all, Victoria had helped to make all of her dreams come true, right…she drove the luxury car she'd always wanted, dined at only the finest restaurants, attended all the hottest celebrity events…she lived in a beautiful, cliff-side penthouse, overlooking the beach, her favorite place in the world. Every piece of clothing she wore was fabulously designed and hand crafted just for her.

_It was a dream come true,_ she thought, _I have it all… money, fame…and all compliments of doing what I love: designing clothes…I should be the happiest girl on earth, but am I happy, truly happy? I don't feel like I am… _

If she were being honest with herself, the answer would have come easily. Was Brooke Davis truly happy? No, did she do a hell of a good job pretending she was, yes! After years of practice, her heartache and pain were almost undetectable on the surface.

When things did get tough, like they had for Brooke just then, she would always revert to her tried and true coping mechanism: distraction. So, she took a deep breath, picked up the stack of envelopes, and started shuffling through them again, sorting each into the appropriate pile. One piece stood out from the rest of the mostly junk mail she had received. It was an envelope, in a color only she would have guessed to be "Ravens Blue", addressed in calligraphy to _**Ms. Brooke Penelope Davis. **_Her inner thoughts got the best of her before she could even attempt to reason with herself.

_The color must be a coincidence_, she thought to herself. _It most certainly couldn't already be…wait let me see one…two…three…four…five, _she counted_…five years had gone by since she left Tree Hill High? It couldn't be…could it?_

The realization that it had in fact been five years since she graduated high school and left Tree Hill struck a chord with the lovely brunette that even she was not ready to face. She quickly returned to opening the envelope and confirmed her suspicion that it was, in fact, an invitation to her 5-year high school reunion.

…_**When you were mine**_

_**You were mine**_

_**And the times comes**_

_**And then it goes**_

_**Then it goes away…**_

In an instant all the pain, all the memories… of the place she once called home, all those years ago, came rushing back to her. She was immediately overcome by her emotions. The scenarios in her head were spinning so wildly; even she herself could just barely follow the train of thought.

_Oh gosh Oh shit, Should I go? Maybe they'll all have forgotten, or be so impressed by my success, or maybe just interested in what celebrities I've met, that they won't bring up why I left Tree Hill and never came back?_

Then it hit her.

_Will he be there? Will Lucas Scott be there? Damn that man! Six whole years had gone by and I still can't get over his damn broody ass! Despicable, I guess that's what you get for falling in love right? That's what the song says at least. Shit…Shit…Shit! Why am I even worrying about going back, I can't go back now, the stores just getting off. But, Nathan and Peyton and Haley…I haven't seen Nathan, or visited Peyton, fuck I haven't even spoken to Haley since, hmmm, almost 2 years now? Damn what an awful friend I've become…_

Her thoughts slowly trailed off and she was left sitting at her desk again. At this point, Brooke was a complete and utter mess, nearly catatonic. She couldn't move, couldn't think. She just starred blankly at the invitation in her hand.

Then, her assistant Millicent barged in the front door of the store. Millie was obviously in a rush, expecting that her boss would have been majorly pissed with her if she were to have been late, but she wasn't late and more importantly…today Brooke had bigger concerns. And, even though she would have much rather preferred to crawl up in a ball and keep her issues to herself, she knew that she had to acknowledge Millie somehow. So she looked up, gingerly, her assistant's smile radiating so genuinely back in her direction, it was even harder to fake it than she thought. Still though, through that toothy smile, was the awkward nervousness that Brooke had grown to love and admire in Millie. That's when she knew if she didn't snap out of it fast and put on her famous B. Davis "happy" smile, Millie would know something was wrong and start to worry. Immediately she started to put on a brave face, but a second glance in Millie's direction proved it was already too late.

"Brooke…what's wrong? You like as though you just saw a ghost!" Millie shrieked.

"Oh…ugh. Nothing really. Just got this silly invitation to my old high school's reunion. But, I can't go anyways, you know, with the store and everything. Don't worry about it."

Brooke pleaded, but Millie wasn't buying it.

"Brooke. I know you better than you give me credit, and I know when something's going on that you're not telling me… but whatever it is, I know you'll tell me when you're ready. But hey, I'm here for you, you know that right sweetie? And, if you need me to take care of the store, or anything while you're gone, you don't even need to ask. It's done."

Brooke had forgotten, until then, how much she loved Millie. She was her assistant, sure, but more than that; Millie was her friend, her best friend. It seemed Millie always knew Brooke a little better than even she wanted to admit, or give on to. When it came down to it, Millie was usually right when it came to matters of the heart.

Yes, it was true, Millie tended to over react in stressful situations; she also had a terrible habit of talking and moving very fast, almost too fast at times, when she was nervous. But, at the same time, she had a great heart and was excellent at her job. Brooke couldn't have asked for a better assistant, or friend.

In fact, by then Millie had moved past the cataloging of the new inventory, having already balanced the stores finances, and was on to tidying up the store for opening. Brooke was stunned. Mille was what one might call: a super assistant. In contrast, she, right now, could barely get herself to stand up straight. And still more pitiful; her questionable attempts proved even minuscule tasks, such as body control, exceeded her abilities right now. Brooke was in for trouble. That much was clear.

_I don't know what I would do without her,_ she thought, referring to Millie's exceptional prowess, both in and out of the store, and how grateful she was to have someone like her around.

Then, just as Brooke started to contemplate her next move, Millie turned around to face her, arms on her hips, foot tapping; doing her best impression of Brooke, to appear convincing.

"You're going okay…I mean it, and I don't even want to hear any arguments. You have none!"

"But…" Brooke tried.

"But, nothing…as you can see the store is in perfectly good hands with me and plus…you'll regret it, if you don't…I know you will," Millie reassured her, placing her long pale hand on Brooke's back, pulling her in for a gigantic bear hug.

Brooke didn't say anything back. Instead she just fell right back into her own thoughts.

_Maybe Millie's right. Maybe I should go…but do I want to go, to see everyone? I guess it's about time I get back there. Yes… _She thought, trying to reassure herself. _The time comes when you have to face the past… man up Davis! It's just a simple visit, one weekend, its not like I'm gonna stay there…yea I owe that much to Nathan...and Lucas._

"Oh what the hell…Tree Hill here I come!" She shouted, and they both laughed.

….

_On a scale of 1 to 10, how am I going to rank my level of success…let alone, happiness? This is such a load of crap_, the sandy blonde thought as she sat filling out her yearly review at work. _What is this stupid thing even testing? My emotional capacity? Am I the only one who needs to fill this out? Ugh, do they think this stuff changes every year? Well news flash people it doesn't…I'm stuck! This is just ridiculous, I mean, I never said I was all coo-coo for coco puffs about this damn job anyways…but it pays the bills and it does feel pretty good sometimes knowing I make a difference, I dunno… _

Right now, you could say Haley James was in a rut; or at least that would be a nice way of putting it. The once aspiring young musician was now a nurse at the Tree Hill County Hospital. While she loved her job, loved helping people…you know saving people, nursing them back to health, it still didn't make her wonder any less if she'd made the right choice all those years ago. So, it was a constant battle with her these days. One moment she was on top of the world and the next she just wanted to lie in her apartment and watch old reruns of "Felicity".

Today was a "Felicity" day. She couldn't contain or control the internal conflict in her head and surrendered easily to her mind's constant banter.

_I once had a promising singing career_, she thought, _now I'm taking care of people who are practically dead! Maybe I should become a country singer? I'd be perfect…their songs are always depressing!_

Technically, Haley's patients were far from dead. Yet, to her they were anything but alive. All of them except for one; a man who ironically, being comatose, seemed to speak to her soul. He and her family alone were what kept her going…what kept her alive.

….

Haley walked up to the front door of her home; she grabbed the mail and headed into the kitchen. It was silent, which reminded her that it was her "special night," alone, no distractions, no taking care of anyone, just free to relax. So, with one hand clutching a diet Pepsi, the other started peeling through the stack of unpaid bills, which had been accumulating over the past month.

_Who has time for this_? Haley thought. _This is MY night! Why am I wasting it with the reality of bills? You don't ever see woman my age paying bills on those CW shows, NO! God forbid they don't always have some knight in shining armor husband, who, never fails…happens to be a professional basketball player or famous author or something equally as absurd! Hell, I work in a hospital and I haven't snagged an eligible doctor yet! What gives? Stupid Grey's Anatomy…making it seem, so easy! _

Just as she was about to throw the whole stack back down, she noticed a bright blue envelope sticking out.

_Well this obviously isn't a bill. If it is, shame on them for being so creative and tricking me with pretty colored envelopes,_ she laughed to herself at the thought and opened it.

_**You are cordially invited to Tree Hill High School's 5-year Reunion**_…

_Wow, it's been five years already? I feel like I haven't moved an inch… _

…_**Don't try to read the silence**_

_**Don't try to live it down **_

_**Cuz I learned a thing or two **_

_**About patience **_

_**And I have found**_

_**When you were mine**_

_**You were mine**_

_**And the times comes**_

_**And then it goes**_

_**Then it goes away…**_

She was somewhat right in her conviction. For most of Tree Hill, including Haley, time, real time, had come to a stand still five years back… after the accident. After that, Tree Hill just wasn't the same. Everyone tried to go their separate ways, avoiding the town, as everything reminded them of the tragedy that took place in front of their very eyes. Relationships suffered; friends lost touch; marriages even collapsed.

Over the past few months Haley had actually started to believe the people of this community were on their way and could get back on their feet. It scared her to imagine how the news of this reunion, even more the actual event, could jeopardize it all. Though, before she could think any more of it, the phone rang.

"Hello," she answered. She was still staring at the invitation, paralyzed by it.

"Hey there Hales, what's up? You sound kinda surprised to hear my voice_,_ everything alright?_" _

_Oh it is so like Lucas to assume something is wrong…that pin head of a best friend. _She sighed, thinking to herself. _How I haven't thrown him to the curb yet, I dunno… But, how could he honestly think I, of all people, would be surprised to hear his voice? In fact now that he brought it up, other than Karen and the occasional call from the hospital, I think Lucas might be the only person that ever calls me_!

"Uh No. Luke, it's just…have you gotten the invitation to the reunion yet?"

"I don't think so but I'm not going. No one there besides you is worth seeing again anyway, and _we_ sure don't need a high school reunion to get together, now do we?"

They both laughed.

"Well you're right about that, but I think I might still go? I mean, maybe one of those jocks I tutored back in the day is now a successful, hmmm… anything, ready to sweep me off my feet?"

"Ha! Yea, Haley, keep dreaming on that one."

Haley was a little insulted, but brushed it off and resumed their friendly banter. "Hey, it _could_ happen, you never know! But, I gotta run, my oven is beeping at me."

"You mean your microwave oven?" He teased while chuckling to himself.

"Goodnight, Bighead…"

"Night Hales!"

She set the phone down and headed back into the kitchen. Lucas was right as usual, it had been her microwave beeping, and the frozen dinner she was now eating in front of the television was nothing to get excited over either. Luckily, Haley was not concerned with any of that right now. She had far bigger worries. Haley wouldn't have dared reveal to Lucas the real reason she wanted to go to the reunion. No, that was something she had to do on her own.

As she sank into the couch that night, running different scenarios in her head, she hoped that Brooke Davis would be at the reunion. If she was, Haley promised herself, they were going to get to the bottom of things, once and for all.

…

The Tree Hill High School Reunion was decked out the way you would expect. Lots of cheesy decorations hung from the walls, tons of cheap food, passed off as delicacies, and spiked punch as the centerpiece. Yes…all the makings of a perfect reunion…

Haley entered the event, as one of the first, prompt as usual. It wasn't in her nature to be late. Looking around there were only a few people she recognized and none were whom she was particularly close with, so she made her way to the refreshments table. The smart one that she was knew, in order for her plan to work, something was needed to settle her nerves.

_What better way than pounding down glass after glass of punch spiked with vodka, _she thought, filling up her first drink all the way to the top. _It was a special occasion…there by, in this particular discretion the rules of proper alcohol consumption did not apply. Right?_

Luckily for Haley, Brooke strolled in nearly an hour later, having given her plenty of time to build up alcohol-induced courage. Although she didn't drink often, really ever, after two glasses even Haley had to admit she was feeling a lot gutsier. That third glass sent her over the edge.

_I can do this, I can do this, I can do this…_ she repeated to herself.

Brooke was nervous, too, for different reasons, but regardless she didn't let it show. Being late might have been a character flaw of hers, but looking vulnerable, or anything less than spectacular; that she wouldn't stand for. There was only one thing, well actually, one person that Brooke was entirely vulnerable to. And, tonight she desperately hoped to be able to avoid him.

Brooke and Haley finally exchanged friendly glances toward one another from across the room. It was a small gesture, but it was enough to encourage a fairly intoxicated Haley to approach her.

"Brooke…Hi!" Haley gasped, while she stumbled into Brooke's embrace.

Brooke took a quick step back, steadying Haley enough for her to stand up straight, which at this point appeared to be quite difficult on her old friend's part.

"Well hello, Ms. James. A little to drink tonight?" Brooke teased Haley.

"Well…if I'm being perfectly honest, a little _might_ be an under statement…"

They both burst out into giggles at the irony of the situation. Here they were five years since the two parted ways, and the roles had completely reversed. Haley being drunk was completely unlike her, but it amused Brooke a great deal. After all, they both knew Brooke was the crazy party girl back in the day, so what had changed? Why was a twenty-three year old Haley James acting like a juvenile delinquent?

Brooke was just about to excuse herself from the conversation when Haley stopped her. "Wait, Brooke, there is something important I have to tell you. But, uh…first I need you to answer this one question for me. It's about…uh." Even with the shield of alcohol she found it hard to force the last bit out. It's about…_Nathan_."

Brooke sighed. She knew the past was sure to be stirred up after this… _what would Haley need or want to know about she and Nathan after five years?_

"Okay…I, I know this may not be the best place to do this, and its not really my place at all, and I know considering the situation it's well…irrelevant now I guess, but…" Haley was stammering to get the words out.

"Tutor girl, relax… thank god I never struggled in public speaking, because damn you would have been _no_ help…so spit it out already"

"Okay, listen…were you and Nathan, you know…ever, _together_?"

There… she did it, Haley was amazed…she had actually spoken the dreaded words out loud, the words she had been holding in and onto for years… there was no turning back now, she was sure of that. The girl finally managed to look up at Brooke, who looked equally stunned.

"Haley, do you _really_ wanna go there? It's just, it's been so long and so much has changed, is it really worth it?"

"I have to know Brooke, I wouldn't dare ask otherwise…"

"Well, fine, okay…you win…but can we go somewhere else? I'm warning you…it's sort of a long story…"

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******Lyrics in this chapter are from "The Time Comes," by Nina Gordon******


	2. Empty Days

**All Those Years Ago**

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**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: This is my first ever fanfic, so reviews are always welcome, and loved!**

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**Empty Days**

…_**She is walking on the clouds**_

_**And falling in between the crowds,**_

_**She's trying and crying and dying**_

_**But I don't stick around**_

_**I don't know where I came from,**_

_**I don't know where I'm going**_

_**All I know is won't you take me,**_

_**Won't you take me, won't you take me away…**_

It had been a long and hard summer for Brooke Davis; definitely not the summer she had imagined or planned. A part of her was relieved that the school year was already starting; it gave her something to do. The other part, though, was aching at the thought of getting through her senior year without her best friend, Peyton Sawyer.

You see, Peyton and Brooke hadn't always, or even often, seen eye to eye on things; they were complete opposites, but they'd always loved each other nonetheless. It was a strange relationship that they had, and now for Brooke not having Peyton around was like losing a sister.

To distract herself, Brooke was trying to find the right outfit to wear, but nothing she had put on in the last hour came close to what she was looking for. She wanted something that screamed out "fashionista," something that would help her to mask away all the faces, and people that would be asking her how she was doing, today. Brooke dreaded those moments, those words, and dreaded even more the awful and awkward silence that followed.

_What did they expect from me? How was I doing? How could anyone even ask me that_, she thought. _How the hell did they think I was doing, Peyton is gone! It'll never be the same…everything about this place reminds me of her, especially cheerleading! To think… _

She then started to picture the first time they had ever met…

_It was cheerleading camp, the summer going into the 4__th__ grade…wow; I remember that so clear it feels like it could have happened only yesterday, not like a decade ago._

Brooke was then deep in thought, as she ransacked her closet and dressers, reminiscing about that fateful July morning. To her it felt like she was there, again…

…_Walking over to a tear stained Peyton, who had been burrowing her head in some old cheerleading sweater, and asking her why she was crying. Peyton of course trying to ignore Brooke, yet finally answering… _

"_I…I, know I'm not the typical cheerleader, trust me, I see __**you**__ and everyone else out here everyday, and you're all just so perfect!" Peyton sighed, putting her head down, and continuing, "but it was my mom's dream, see, she was captain," handing Brooke the crumbled sweater and looking up at her for the first time._

Brooke then found herself holding her very own cheerleading sweater in her hands, pulling her momentarily out of her thoughts. She quickly scanned it over with her hand, looking for the embroidered "C" indicating captain, and finding it just as she had on Peyton's mom's sweater that day…

"_It's all I've got left of her…the least I could do is try, right, but I failed her, Brooke, Reagan's right, I'll never be the cheerleader my mom was… or thought I could be…" _

_Peyton's words caught Brooke off guard, so tragic yet so endearing. She really didn't know exactly what to say to the girl to make her stop crying, but she did know that Peyton needed her, and not too many people did…that was enough for Brooke. _

_So she sprung into action, grabbing Peyton's arm and marching over to the "famous" Reagan James, a 7__th__ grader and a very popular one at that. Reagan could have very well ruined Brooke Davis if she had wanted to, Peyton knew it, and so did she, but it didn't matter…Brooke was determined to make things right…_

"_Excuse me, who are you to tell Peyton that she is too gawky or awkward to be a cheerleader…I don't suppose someone died and made you queen of all cheerleaders?" Brooke accused, with one hand on her hip._

_When Reagan only turned her way and didn't answer, Brooke gained confidence. _

"_If Peyton wants to cheer she should be able to cheer…and you want to cheer right, Peyton?"_

"_Um…yes."_

"_Okay, well than that is settled," Brooke declared. _

_Reagan only half-smiled, saying, "Whatever, Davis…she's all yours…" _

_And the two walked off hand and hand, Brooke tugging at Peyton as they skipped away._

Brooke let out a quiet laugh and a single tear, remembering how that day had changed both their lives, forever.

From that day on, B. Davis and P. Sawyer had vowed to be there for each other...always. They had only two things in common: cheerleading and a lack of parental guidance. Most people would have written off their friendship a long time ago, but they remained true to their promise. For eight whole years they struggled together; through the good times and the bad. Nothing seemed too hard for those two to handle. Nothing until then.

…_**What would it mean**_

_**To turn out the lights**_

_**What would it mean**_

_**To try to not try**_

_**What is the answer**_

_**To all my spiders**_

_**Spirits gone, pushed it away…**_

"Us against the world, Hoe's over Bro's, right Peyt? She whispered.

Tears then streamed down the beautiful brunettes face. She grasped the box Peyton had left her that summer, just before she took an entire bottle of pills and never woke up. The box held every picture Brooke and Peyton had ever taken together, or of each other. It also contained a silly mug that Brooke had made her for her 12th birthday, and a mix tape…Peyton's version of a final goodbye. She held the box in her arms, tightly, as if to never let go.

"Why?" She sobbed. "Why couldn't you just come to me…why wasn't I enough…why did you leave me all alone…you promised…always!"

She cried out to Peyton, curled up in a ball on her bed, still holding onto the box, the only piece of Peyton Sawyer that was left. "Knock, Knock." She heard, and then Nathan's voice grabbed her out of her sobs.

"Brooke, are you alright, I can hear you crying…can I come in?"

_Of course he was here to pick me up,_ she thought, _it's the first day of school, my senior year, and now I'm going to look like a hot mess from crying all morning. _

"Okay, come in Nate!" She shouted as she stood to face him with her arms stretched out.

"Tada…how do I look…honestly?" She asked, choking up from the tears that were again welling up in her eyes.

She sat back down on the bed and wiped the tear that fell.

"Honestly, Brooke, you look like..."

He paused, moving to sit beside her, placing one arm around her waist.

"You look like someone whose best friend killed themselves…someone grieving, and that's normal."

She looked up at him now, confused. _Since when did Nathan Scott become so intellectual and amazing_?

"Well… then why don't you look like someone whose girlfriend just killed themselves?"

"Look, at me B, I do…trust me. Today won't be easy for me either…but we've got each other."

"You're right," she said, doing her best to sound convincing, while sniffling. "Let's go remind Tree Hill High why we run the show!"

She smiled, and he laughed. They then walked to his car, and headed off to campus.

Brooke and Nathan had known each other for as long as either one of them could remember. Their families were friends, or rather they called themselves friends, so they were always together. It's funny though, because things definitely weren't always the way they were now, between her and Nate.

_Yes things were different, for sure, but in a surprisingly good way, _she thought.

After everything they had went through together that summer, in losing Peyton, he was her rock now. He was the only person that got her, understood her, quirks and all, and she was his.

He knew, all too well, the way they desperately tried to please people, especially their parents, by being the best, and how that persona often made them look like awful, conceited, spoiled brats. They had to act that like that.

Yes, it had always been that way for Brooke and Nathan…they both had parents who could have cared less about them most of the time. Parents who threw fancy cars and credit cards their way to make up for it.

Brooke and Nathan were constantly searching for ways into their parents' hearts. Yet, after so many years of defeat, they were only left with scars, ones that built up into emotional boundaries.

So where as Peyton had always accepted the fact that walls of superficial identities guarded Brooke, she never understood it. Nathan on the other hand, did completely, for he was the exact same way.

"See ya at lunch hotstuff!" She winked, walking off to her locker.

"Bye, B." He said back, rolling his eyes.

….

At school Brooke and Nathan acted as if nothing had happened, as if both of their hearts were not smashed to pieces, ready to crumble at any moment. Instead they poured their energy into appearing as normal and happy as possible. It was just like them to hide their pain that way; behind the shield of their popularity.

Upon entering the lunchroom, their fake smiles were flashing brightly, as if to dim the reality that none of these people mattered. Yet no matter how they acted, they were just as alone, if not more alone, and empty as anyone who dared to compare.

People saw Brooke Davis, cheerleading captain, and Nathan Scott, basketball star, and they envied them. They were two of a kind, always had been, and always would be. People were starring; eyes were all on them, as they made their way to their familiar spots at the head of the table, resuming their roles as King and Queen of Tree Hill High, without a glitch.

Peyton's death complicated things for both of them, sure, she was the only other person, other than themselves, that either ever truly cared about, or who had cared about them. Even that didn't make a difference in how those two acted, at least in public.

_Why give them anything to use against us,_ they thought. _They only want us to stumble or fall so that they can take over and have the power. Little do they know how hard it really is to keep this up, and how lonely it is once you're there. _

They had always been excellent at hiding their true selves. To the world, Nathan would always be Nathan, and Brooke would be Brooke; they were arrogant, spoiled, and consumed by themselves, cheerleading, basketball, partying, alcohol, and let's not forget…sex.

Apparently those were the important things to these two, the things they wanted people to associate with them, and nothing else really mattered. Sometimes that meant having to put on a show, because unveiling the real Brooke or Nathan was far too risky for either of their reputations. No matter how fragile, and vulnerable those two were inside, no one would have ever gotten the chance to see that side of them. Opening up to someone, truly letting them in, that was Brooke and Nathan's biggest fear; a true testament of love.

Brooke then stood up to address the table.

"Excuse me…everyone, I have an announcement to make. Next Friday Nathan and I are throwing a back to school party at his parents beach house…plenty of the necessities, booze and food, and for entertainment…well me of course," she explained seductively, revealing herself with her best Vana White impression.

"Well, is it gonna be a "Shouldn't miss", or a "Can't miss," Bevin asked, using the very scale Brooke had invented to rate parties.

"It's clearly a "Can't miss," Bevin, right Nate?" she shrieked hitting his shoulder for reinforcement.

"Uh…of course, it's a Nathan Scott/Brooke Davis party, who's gonna turn down the chance to experience that," he boasted.

_Good…Yes,_ Brooke thought to herself, _a party is just what they needed._

After the party announcement the table erupted in private conversations, the girls were busy discussing what they were going to wear, the guys who they were planning to bang, and Brooke, well she was considering both.

"Hey Nate, you gonna invite that new basketball player, Lucas, you know the one with the same last name as you," Tim, Nathan's best friend asked laughing.

Tim was an idiot, controlled by immature boyish tendencies, but he meant well for the most part. He and Nathan had been buddies since the first grade, and ever since then Tim had clung to Nathan like white on rice. Having Nathan as a best friend was a golden ticket for Tim, and he knew his place, he was just too stupid at times to not open up his big fat mouth, as Nathan often phrased it.

So Nathan quickly turning towards Tim with a look that only Tim would understand was enough to remind him that Lucas was not to be discussed.

"Okaaay, never mind that idea…he's a tool anyways, more lady options for the Timmiester, yeahhhh!"

Tim continued making vulgar humping movements in the air until Nathan smacked him across the head.

"Enough," Nathan said, turning back to eating his pizza and tuning out Tim and the rest of the guys. He didn't want to have to think about Lucas being on the team right now, all he wanted to do was enjoy his lunch in peace.

Too bad for Nathan, just across the lunchroom, only a mere 30 feet away, sat Lucas Scott, the estranged half brother of Nathan, fathered by the same man, the illustrious Dan Scott.

Nathan and Lucas didn't exactly get along, well that would be an understatement, they basically hated one another. Yet until then, until Lucas decided to join the Ravens basketball team that summer, things had been perfect according to Nathan. He liked that Lucas was a nobody. He liked that, because Lucas's mother refused any help from Dan, they didn't have much money. He liked that compared to Lucas he was the star in Dan's eyes, the star of the Ravens, and he'd be damned if Lucas tried to take away any of his glory.

Nathan looked up glaring at Lucas and his mysterious lady friend, as they walked by his table. Lucas was a parasite in Nathan's opinion, always leeching onto something Nathan had. In grammar school it was Peyton, and he had somewhat learned to get over that, but now it was basketball…and that had always been Nathan's one and only true love.

_This is my year, my senior year, and that punk ass, wannabe, has the nerve to step on my turf…not if I have anything to say about it_, he thought to himself.

Just then Brooke bent down to whisper in his ear.

"You're inviting that new boy, whatever his name is, you know the blonde Broody one that you hate so much, hmm yea Broody, that's a perfect name for him… anyways listen, I don't care if he's sleeping with your mom Nate, quit it! You can't go around ignoring the fact that he exists, its impossible. And plus, he's kinda sexy in a Ryan Gosling, Notebook kinda way…"

_Brooke would demand something as outrageous as me inviting that leech to our party, the nerve she's got_, Nathan thought.

He wanted no part of Lucas, and the last place he wanted him was in his own home, but he knew better than anyone that there was no point in arguing with Brooke Davis. Once she had her mind made up about something there was no turning back. He admired that in Brooke, but damn did it piss him off most of the time.

"Whatever, fine…I'll do it," he grumbled. "You happy now, Queen B?"

"Yes, and its about time you started showing some respect to your ladyship!"

She snarled back at him, with that uncanny victorious smirk of hers, flipping her hair and bouncing off away from the table.

_She's impossible_, he thought, shaking his head at her as she walked away.

Brooke hurried out of the cafeteria wanting to get to the tutoring center before anyone might see her in there. According to last year's agreement with Ms. Joyce, the cheerleading coach, Brooke had to spend 2 hours with a math tutor every week. If she kept that up, along with her grades she could stay on the squad. Otherwise, well…she couldn't even think about what would happen if…I mean with out cheerleading who was she?

_Okay, this should be easy just pick a tutor any tutor, _Brooke thought, sifting through the binder at the front desk. _First name on the list, Haley James. Hmm, sounds like a smart name…this is more fun than I thought!_

She then quickly signed up underneath this Haley's name and scurried out.

….

The first day of school was over. Finally. Now Brooke just had to visit with Haley James, tutor girl, she figured she would call her.

_Appropriate, because she is a tutor and a girl, right,_ she thought.

Brooke waited until as many people had left the hallway as possible before walking into the tutor center. She looked around the room, searching for someone that looked like a Haley to her, but she couldn't put a name to any of the faces. That was to be expected though. Brooke really didn't pay much attention to the meaningless faces at Tree Hill High. If they weren't of some significant purpose directly affecting her she did not care. Basically if you weren't a cheerleader, an athlete, or any guy she happened to fall into bed with, she didn't know your name, or your face. The later she hardly remembered after the act either.

"Ah Brooke Davis, in the flesh. You are here to see me I think, my name is Haley. Why don't we go take a seat at that table," the petite sandy haired girl said while pointing to a table across the room in the corner.

_Perfect, far far away from the door, no one will see me,_ Brooke thought.

But this Haley, she wasn't what Brooke was expecting. She had expected some goofy looking nerd, with miss-matched clothing, maybe even some librarian glasses…but, no…Haley James was actually surprisingly put together, and dare she say, pretty?

Brooke was now officially appraising Haley…

_I have an instinct with this kinda thing_, she thought. _I mean she is by no means prettier than me, but tutor girl's got some potential, hmm, I could give her a make over or something, that would be much more entertaining than…math, so… Step 1. Get rid of the hideous poncho, at least I think that's what she is wearing…_

"So," Haley began again ripping Brooke out of her own thoughts, "what exactly are you here for this early in the semester, you can't possibly be failing already, can you?"

"Math," Brooke replied dryly a little insulted by her insinuation, but more concerned with the girls nails than the actual girl in front of her.

She continued, "I have an agreement with my cheerleading coach, I go to 2 hours of tutoring each week, and I stay on the squad, I don't well, I'm here aren't I, Tutor girl, you get the picture don't you, you're supposed to be the "smart" one remember?"

Brooke gave Haley a quick smile, hoping that Haley would not notice her embarrassment in the whole situation. Brooke hated to look vulnerable, and having to ask for help with anything made her uneasy.

"A cheerleader, huh…yea you remind me of my sister, Reagan…you may have known her, she was one of you all…thought she ruled the universe just because she had a little "C" branded into her uniform…anyways the point is, at the end of the day, none of that bluster or BS matters, because "math" don't care, and neither do I, so if this is some sort of joke to you, I suggest you'd better find someone else to help you!"

Brooke was flabbergasted. _Tutor girl was Reagan's little sister? Well that explains a lot_, she thought.

"I'm sorry, if I offended you, it's just this whole thing really isn't easy for me, and I don't have anything to work on yet, but I wanted to come meet you, I am serious about this, I promise"

The two girls met eyes for the first time in this awkward meeting.

"Okay well, you met me, so… I guess we are done here then?"

"Um, yes I guess we are, so I'll still see you Wednesday then?"

Brooke turned to walk out; hoping her attempt at an apology was enough.

"Yes, Wednesday is fine, but next time actually bring something I can help you with, okay Ms. Davis?"

Brooke walked to her car mumbling to herself under her breath.

_Who does she think she is? Treating Brooke Davis like a nobody, ugh, the nerve of those smart people, _she thought._ This is definitely going to be a long semester. Tutor girl means business!_

Brooke then walked off to where she had been spending all her afternoons, for the past few months, sitting at the park. The same park, same bench that used to be Peyton's special place. She never came there with Peyton when she was alive, but now it was the one place where Brooke felt whole.

…

Haley rushed into Karen's Café where she worked most days of the week, putting on her apron while she ran around, finally making it up to the register. Lucas was sitting at one of the bar stools that fanned out around the counter. He was deep into whatever John Steinbeck novel he had decided to re-read that week, and as usual he was slightly oblivious to the fact that his best friend Haley was having some sort of rage attack.

…_**I tripped on these roads everyday**_

_**It seems like they never ever change**_

_**They don't know how I got here,**_

_**Oh, and neither do you**_

_**All these days they go so fast,**_

_**No they go so slow**_

_**All I know is won't you take me,**_

_**Won't you take me, won't you take me away?...**_

Since it was clear to her that she was getting nowhere… beating around the bush, waiting for him to consider concerning himself with her obvious anxiety, Haley decided she was going to have to take control of this situation. So she nearly jumped over the counter, placing herself entirely too close to his face for his normal avoidance tactics to work, and interrupted him by slamming his book shut.

_That'll do it,_ she thought to herself as Luke's head popped up.

She have him a quick smile, which was rather awkward considering she was breathing down his throat, and then backed up a bit. She knew she'd get nowhere with him if she didn't at least attempt the smallest degree of politeness.

_He was so old school_, she thought. _He might try reading books from this century once in a while; maybe then he'd cut me some slack when it came to his preconceived notions of what constitutes ladylike behavior._

Lucas was about to say something witty and profound she could just feel it, but Haley knew him better than anyone, and cut him off before he could get out even a word.

"Luke, why is Brooke Davis sitting on that park bench over there across the street?"

She pointed in Brooke's direction, and from the sound of it, Haley didn't like the intrusion on her domain, which she basically considered anywhere in or around the cafe.

Lucas was taken back a bit by Haley's possessiveness over a park bench, but he sensed it was more than just that, so he humored her for the moment.

"Hales, she's been sitting there everyday for the past three months, ever since Peyton, you know." Lucas responded, trailing off at the end, not wanting to go any further with the topic.

"Oh, I guess I've just never noticed her before, but…"

Haley was not completely, or rather even the slightest bit, satisfied with Lucas's response, and kept probing.

"Well, did you know that she also signed up for me to be her math tutor?" she asked, accusingly.

"Nope, I didn't get that memo, but now I do, thanks for filling me in… can I go back to my book, now?"

He was mocking her now, which aggravated Haley even more.

"Lucas Eugene Scott, I may have been gone this summer, but I didn't wake up yesterday! Brooke Davis does not sit on park benches and doodle or whatever the hell she's doing…and she definitely isn't the type to request a tutor on the first day of classes! So what's going on? She's either taunting me…or…I dunno, seducing you maybe, either way it doesn't make sense and I don't like it," she yelled.

Haley had now resorted to frantically organizing the coffee bean jars as a way to distract herself and calm down. Lucas noticed, so he held in his laughter in response to Haley's ridiculous accusations. He gestured her to sit down as he was certain if she didn't she might explode or simply pass out.

"Wow, slow down there Hales, you really need to get a grip, I'm pretty sure that if her intentions were to taunt you she would have devised a more aggressive strategy than sitting on a park bench 200 feet away, or signing up for you to tutor her…do you even realize how insane that sounds? If I didn't know you better Ms. James I might see to it that you are institutionalized."

He laughed a bit to signal his attempt to lighten the mood, but Haley was just starring at him. So he continued.

"Plus she should only be there for another half hour, if that."

He hoped that last part would put this whole conspiracy theory of hers to rest, but instead it just riled her up even more.

"How do you know that?" She blurted out.

"Well you see, my dear, if you'd had paid any attention, any attention at all the last few weeks that you've been back, you would have realized that she follows the same schedule everyday. She comes at 4 o' clock, always on foot either after a run, or leisurely walk, takes that seat she's in right now, and sits fairly catatonically until Nathan comes and picks her up around 5:30."

"What?" She screamed. "You, actually know her schedule now, and…Nathan's? Tell me you are not stalking this one like you were Peyton, you do realize you sound like the one who needs to be institutionalized now!"

"Okay, first of all, I did not stalk Peyton, granted I might have had some rather intense feelings for her in the 7th grade, but if I recall correctly you were pretty serious about eloping with Jonathon Taylor Thomas, so I consider us even! Secondly, it is not nice to speak ill of the dead…and jeez Hales give the girl a break her best friend killed herself, how would you feel?"

Upon hearing Lucas's last words Haley realized how horrible she was being.

"You're right," she sighed, going back to her work responsibilities, leaving Lucas to take one last glance in Brooke's direction, before turning back to his book.

"Look at her, Hales, have you ever seen Brooke Davis so peaceful," he asked.

Haley looked over towards her again. "No," Haley admitted.

…_**What would it mean**_

_**Turn out the lights**_

_**What would it mean**_

_**To try, to not try**_

_**What is the answer**_

_**To all of my spiders**_

_**Spirits gone, I pushed it away**_

_**Saying, spirits gone, I pushed it away…**_

Lucas was surprisingly grateful for the time he now had to think and clear his head. Until Haley brought it up, Lucas hadn't really considered exactly how often he had observed Brooke over the last couple months. With Haley away at music academy he didn't have all that much to do besides the occasional trip to the Rivercourt to play hoops with the guys. The rest of the time he spent helping his mom at the café. So it was a natural transition.

He used to watch Peyton sit there alone, drawing away, till the day before she killed herself. He remembered that day like it was yesterday…

_On that day instead of Nathan or Brooke picking Peyton up, she just shoved a stack of her artwork in the garbage and left. I didn't have the courage to follow her and say something to her that day, if I had, maybe she wouldn't have, you know, but it doesn't matter. Instead I only walked over to the garbage and took out what she had tossed. Her artwork was beautiful, just like she had been, only dark and empty. The only constant that radiated through Peyton's artwork was her depiction of Brooke… _

Peyton's version of Brooke was nothing like the conceited, spoiled party girl everyone else in Tree Hill saw her to be.

_No, in those drawings, Brooke was brilliant, beautiful, and brave,_ he thought.

The woman sitting across the street from him right now, he concluded, was not the Tree Hill version of Brooke, the empty callous soul. He was mystified by this other version of Brooke he saw. He couldn't help but wonder if maybe that was her way of connecting with Peyton, sitting there in the same spot that Peyton had sat for so many years. He hoped, for her sake that Peyton's version had not died along with her, and that maybe just maybe, there was something more to Brooke Davis, than met everyone's eye.

Just then the familiar roar of Nathan's Porsche GT2 shook through the café as he drove by, breaking any rational train of thought that Lucas had at that moment. Nathan then circled through the parking lot, screeched to a stop, pushing open the passenger side door from the drivers seat. He let Brooke in, threw the car in reverse, and then sped out onto the street and out of everyone's' sight.

…_**Oh, I'm singing,**_

_**na na na na na na, na na na na na**_

_**Away, oh, away**_

_**And we're singing,**_

_**Na na na na na na, na na na na na**_

_**And we're singing,**_

_**Away, oh, away…**_

This spectacle caught Haley's attention. She was captivated.

"Damn I wish I had that car," she said. "Why have I never noticed it before? Weird…"

"Yeah, you and me both," replied Lucas, "but keep dreaming…"

Haley spun around to give him a good punch, but Luke was ready for it, and caught her fists in his own.

"Lucas, let me go you butthead!"

"Not until you promise you won't hit me…"

"Fine…deal, but you were scared, I know you were!"

They both erupted in laugher at the thought of Haley being scary…not a chance!

* * *

******The lyrics I used for this chapter came from Empty Days, by Augustana******


	3. Beautiful Disaster

**All Those Years Ago**

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**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: This is my first ever fanfic, so reviews are always welcome, and loved! Thanks to those of you who have!**

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* * *

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**Beautiful Disaster**

…_**She loves her mama's lemonade,**_

_**Hates the sound that goodbyes make.**_

_**She prays one day she'll find someone to need her.**_

_**She swears that there's no difference,**_

_**Between the lies and compliments.**_

_**It's all the same if everybody leaves her...**_

The weekend had finally arrived, and no one was more pleased about that than Brooke. She had been restlessly waiting for that Friday, ever since she had made the announcement of her and Nathan's party the first day of school. It had been brutal over the last couple of days, but now it was here at last!

Now all she had to do was find Nathan, so that they could head over to his place and start setting up. However, finding Nathan wasn't always the easiest of tasks. She hoped that he would still be standing by his locker, so she sped in that direction.

_Oh, he better be here, _she thought._ We still have so much to do…clean the kitchen, stock the bathrooms, get the liquor, and the food!_

Brooke was making a list of "things to do" in her head, so she wasn't paying much attention to where she was walking, until she literally bumped into Nathan.

"Oh thank god you're here!" She cried.

"Uh yea, good to see you too, Brooke"

"You know we have a billion things to do before this party gets under way tonight, don't you?" She asked.

She realized then that they were not alone. In fact, right beside her was Broody. His presence sent a twinge of excitement through her veins.

_I wonder if Nathan invited him like I told him to…he'd better have, _she thought.

Then a different voice, a female one, pulled her out of her daydream of Lucas shirtless.

"Lucas, hey…what's the deal, are we going to see the movie tonight or what?"

It was Haley, her math tutor. Brooke cringed, turning away from Nathan now, to face the other two.

_Tutor girl is dating Broody? No way,_ she thought. _I guess there's only one way to find out…_

"Oh Haley, Hi… I didn't see you there…are you coming to our party tonight?" Brooke asked, cutting off Lucas from responding to Haley's question.

"Umm hey there, Brooke… you know, that is normally how it works when someone approaches." Haley said sarcastically, "And…"

Lucas and Nathan looked at the two girls and then each other, confused.

"You two are…friends?" They finally blurted out at the same time.

"Well, not exactly…but regardless a friend of Broody's is a friend of ours, right Nathan? Don't be rude. I just assumed they were a packaged deal, and since you did invite him, well didn't you…"

Brooke pointed at Lucas, still eyeing Nathan, waiting for his answer.

"Yea, I invited Lucas, he is part of the team…" He scoffed.

"Okay then…Lucas…Haley, we can expect that you two will be in attendance then?"

Lucas looked at Haley with pleading eyes. He hadn't mentioned the party to her yet. He had been hoping to have a bit more time to persuade her, but by the looks of it, Brooke was doing just that.

Haley, on the other hand, would have much rather gone to see the movie they had planned, but she could tell that this was important to Lucas, for some reason.

"Fine, but you owe me big" Haley whispered in Lucas's ear.

He then directed his voice toward Brooke and Nathan.

"Yes, we'll be there, thanks."

The couples then retreated amongst their own conversations, walking further, and further away. At that moment none of them knew that the night that they were all about to have would change their lives forever.

…

Brooke managed to pull all the details together in time for the big party. Everything was set; everything was perfect, she thought, except for herself. She quickly bound up the stairs to the room she had situated earlier for getting ready.

"Nathan, I'm taking a shower and getting ready…make sure you're down there for when people start coming, because I might be a while!" She yelled, before slipping into the shower.

_**...And every magazine tells her she's not good enough,**_

_**The pictures that she's seen make her cry.**_

_**She would change everything, everything just ask her.**_

_**Caught in the in between, a beautiful disaster…**_

Nathan took one last look in the mirror and was pleased. He made his way down into the kitchen and turned on the T.V. He couldn't possibly imagine what could take Brooke so long to get ready, but be wasn't going to question it. He knew better.

Within the next hour the team arrived, followed by about another 30-40 Tree Hill seniors, who filed in sporadically. Brooke was still busy upstairs, beautifying herself and taking pre-game shots from a personal bottle of vodka, when Lucas and Haley walked in.

"So, I guess this is it, huh…the good life, I mean" Lucas said to Haley.

"Is that what you came here for? Validation? Cuz I'm just, I'm trying to bring some perspective, here to this really screwing situation, and I'm sure having you around isn't any easier for him than it is for you and I think maybe if you guys could just talk…I mean, Luke, have you guys ever actually talked?"

"Yea sure we trade e-mails too, and share clothes, just like normal brothers are supposed to do…" Lucas replied sarcastically.

"I'm serious… Then what are we doing here? Obviously, you're looking for something, right?"

"I'm not going to let him win."

"Okay, if you say so…I'm gonna go find one of the 14 bathrooms in this place to use, just be careful."

Lucas followed the hallway, until he reached the kitchen, where everyone was gathered.

…_**She's giving boys what they want, tries to act so nonchalant,**_

_**Afraid they'll see that she's lost her direction…**_

In the meantime, Brooke had made her way downstairs and into the kitchen, joining Nathan, Theresa, Vegas, and a few others, who were playing a drinking game. Just then, Lucas and Haley walked in, from opposite sides of the room.

"Lucas…Haley, come play with us!" Brooke instructed, waving them forward.

"What's the game?" They asked in unison.

"I never…"

"And yet apparently, you have." Vegas slipped in.

"Shut up, Vegas…you don't know what you're talking about. Listen, it's a drinking game, everyone says something that they have never done, and if you have, you drink, its simple see, I've never…Oh wait, I have…oops!" Brooke drinks, and everyone laughs.

Lucas and Haley had by then found two open seats at the table and sat down. Haley looked around the table. She was a little nervous, but determined. And then it happened, she saw him sitting across from her, Nathan Scott. His crystal blue-grey eyes were piercing back at her. She could barely function, let alone speak; it was a feeling she had never felt before.

"So, then it's your turn little lady." Nathan gestured towards Haley.

"Hales, you sure you wanna play a drinking game? The last, and only time, you've ever drank was a Reagan's wedding, and we both know how that went." Lucas half whispered to her.

_What is going on? Why can I not speak? Oh I wish I had never looked into his eyes…I have got to pull myself together, this is ridiculous,_ she thought.

"I can handle myself Luke!" Haley spat back. Now looking directly at Nathan, "I've, I've never…played a drinking game before?"

They all drank on that one except for Haley, but now Nathan had a plan.

"Okay, my turn…I've never… gotten straight A's in a semester." Nathan spoke, and of course Haley had to drink.

"Well that's no fun!" Brooke pouted.

"Hey, whatever you're up to, don't mess with Haley." Lucas warned.

"Were just playing a game, man, relax! How bout this one I've never.... I've never had a dad who wished I was a stain on the bed sheets."

The tension in the room had made it to an all time high. No one really knew how to respond.

"You're welcome to mine." Lucas said pounding his fist down onto the table next to Nathan, spilling punch all over Haley in the process, and walking out onto the back porch.

Brooke immediately grabbed Haley's arm pulling her upstairs, to get a change of clothes.

…_**She never stays the same for long,**_

_**Assuming that she'll get it wrong.**_

_**Perfect only in her imperfections.**_

_**She's not a drama queen,**_

_**She doesn't want to feel this way, only seventeen, but tired…**_

"Listen, I know Nate can be an ass sometimes, well most of the time actually, but he's a good guy deep down." Brooke began. "Here, you can wear this," she said, holding a purple tank top in Haley's direction, "it'll look great on you, against the color of your eyes, trust me…"

"Okay?"

"You know what, let me just fix you up a bit too, while were up here."

Brooke then opened up her huge make up bag, and got to work on Haley. When she had finished, Haley looked stunning. Brooke could hardly believe it was the same girl. Haley was even more surprised by the transformation, when she finally looked into the mirror Brooke was holding up.

"Oh my gosh! What have you done?" Haley squealed.

"I'm sorry do you hate it? I can do something else…but I personally think you look amazing Tutor girl!"

"No, No…" Haley laughed.

It was starting to feel like she and Brooke might be becoming friends, as weird as that sounded.

_Drama queen, cheerleading slut one moment, then wise and caring big sister the next, _she thought. _It's crazy, but it feels nice. There are so many sides to Brooke Davis; it must be exhausting for her to keep track of them all._

"I love it, Brooke, I never thought I would have to say this to someone for doing my makeup, but thank you."

"My pleasure…now let's get back down to the party, so that I can show you off, and you can knock the socks off all the eligible bachelors!"

…_**She would change everything for happy ever after**_

_**Cuz she's just the way she is, but no ones told her that's ok.**_

_**And she would change everything, everything just ask her…**_

The two girls walked back downstairs, to find everyone crowded around the large plasma screen T.V. in the living room. Tim was fidgeting with the VCR, next to Nathan, trying to get a video inside.

"Oh boy, its probably just some porno…Tim's a freak!" Brooke explained to Haley.

Then at the exact same time both Nathan and Lucas caught a glimpse of the new Haley James. The two brothers walked simultaneously in her direction. Brooke noticed immediately.

"Told ya, you're a show stopper," Brooke whispered to Haley, smiling.

But, before any of them could speak they were interrupted by the voices on the T.V., playing in the background. Both brothers looked back towards the screen in disbelief.

The video playing was of Dan and Karen, Lucas's mother, back in High School at their senior Homecoming dance, being crowned King and Queen. It was brutal for both of them to watch, especially Lucas.

Brooke and Haley starred at the video, listening to Karen explain where she saw herself 10 years from now, "probably happily ever after, married to Dan, maybe even a kid or two," were her words.

Everyone besides Lucas, Haley, and Brooke were laughing at Karen's idea of "happily ever after."

Brooke was disgusted; she managed to push through the crowd of people watching, and quickly threw herself in front of the T.V.

"Shut it off Tim! Is this funny to you people? They are just like any of us, at least what we could hope to be. They were in love! Don't you get it? So what if it didn't turn out the way she planned. She took a chance, and I admire her for that. Someone wise once told me that, "The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart." She gave him her heart, and it was his own damn fault, not hers, if he pissed it away!"

Brooke then stormed off, pushing Nathan in the chest as she left.

"You're a real ass you know that Scott, but sometimes you really take it way too far!"

"Brooke, wait up, please…I didn't even know that was what Tim was putting on! I swear!" Nathan pleaded behind her.

"Just forget about it, maybe if you didn't treat Peyton like an object you could piss away, she'd still be here!"

Brooke was furious, but as she looked up at Nathan, she knew she too had just taken it too far.

"I'm sorry, Nate…I didn't mean that. I just need to be alone right now, okay?"

Brooke then walked down toward the swing set, in Nathan's back yard, leaving him alone. He turned around just in time to see that Haley had been listening.

_Gosh she is beautiful_, he thought. _In a weird librarian meets rock star kinda way._

She was already walking away by then. He assumed she was going to find Lucas.

….

Inside, Haley had found Lucas, pacing back and forth in the den. She didn't know what to say to him, after hearing everything she had just witnessed.

"Are you okay?" She finally said.

"Yea, I'm not going to let him get to me…"

"I see how that's working out for you."

They both laughed.

"Listen, this is gonna sound crazy but, I don't think Nathan knew about the tape…I mean I don't think he meant for it to be played at least."

"Why do you think that, and why are you defending him?"

"I don't know exactly, and I wouldn't say I'm defending him, Lucas…it's just, after seeing how badly Brooke reacted to the situation, even without knowing Karen is your mom, and then well, I was sorta eaves dropping into their argument, and I must say Brooke really laid it into him, and he just looked so…innocent. He promised her he didn't know, and for some reason, I believe him."

"So I am supposed to just let him disrespect my mother like that?"

"All I am saying is you're so hypersensitive around each other. And… I get it. I just think that maybe everything he says, you take the wrong way, and vice versa."

"Okay Hales, now you're starting to sound like my shrink or something, you just don't get it…"

"We came here today because you wanted to, remember…not me…I was just trying to help!"

With that Haley turned around and left the room, but Lucas knew she was right.

….

Haley was just about to walk out the front door when Nathan appeared. He out stretched his arms, barricading her from leaving. She was pissed…at him, at this situation, at everything, but somehow she still couldn't resist him.

"Where are you going so fast?" He asked.

"Um, home…don't you think there has been enough damage done tonight?"

"Yea, you're right. But, didn't you come here with Lucas? How are you getting home?"

"I'm walking, I…I'm really fine."

"You're a little high on yourself, aren't you? Going around telling people you're all fine…why don't you and your fineness stay a while longer…and come have a drink with me, it's the least I can do. "

He was smiling proudly at her, doing that thing with his eyes that she had promised herself, after what had happened during the drinking game, would never dazzle her out of her wits again. It was too late, though. She was dazzled, just not out of her wits.

"Okay, one drink, but that's it…and don't even think about getting fresh with me Mr. Scott…I'm not the kinda girl you're used to running around with."

"It's not like I was trying to seduce you," He retorted, laughing.

"Oh…that's not your default setting? My apologies."

Haley then followed him, as they passed through the kitchen. He grabbed two beers out of the fridge with one hand, while holding open the screen door to the back porch with the other. He handed her one of the bottles, ushering her to sit beside him on the steps, by patting the space next to him with his hand, and when she got close enough, gently placing it on the small of her back.

Haley was a virgin in this territory, literally and figuratively. Other than Lucas, she had never really been alone, on an intimate level, with any guy before. With Lucas, he was just a friend, so it never felt like this. Nathan gave her butterflies, it all the right places.

_Why am I letting myself act this way, feel this way,_ she thought. _I shouldn't even be sitting with him right now…Lucas would kill me if he knew!_

"Look, I've been thinking. I'm sorry, Nathan, I just don't think it's a good idea, that we're hanging out."

"Because of Lucas?"

"Well, obviously, yeah. I don't know what I was thinking. There's no good that can possibly come of this."

"Really? I thought I saw you guys fight back there."

"Meaning what, that I should keep hanging out with you to stick it to him? Maybe that's how they do things in Nathan land, but I'm not gonna do that to my best friend."

Haley stood up, ready to leave, but Nathan took her hand before she could.

"That's not what I meant…I was kidding, and you know that." He said softly.

"I don't know anything about you other than what Lucas has told me, and trust me that does not lean me towards liking you."

"Well don't you at least think you ought to give yourself the chance to get to know me, for yourself…not some idea Lucas has planted in your head?"

"It's complicated…too complicated, I don't even know what is right or wrong anymore…I guess I might like to…"

Before Haley could get out her last words, Lucas appeared from the shadows of Nathan's backyard. She could tell he was carrying something quite large, and from what she could gather, it looked like a person, but there was no life in this person, just a body …with long dark hair, pale skin…dangling from his arms.

"Lucas?" They both yelled.

"Come help." He cried back to them. "She needs help."

The two headed straight towards Lucas. Nathan was rushing, clearly concerned. If Lucas was holding, whom he thought it might be…Brooke, he would be devastated.

"Is it Brooke?" Nathan gasped as they had almost reached Lucas.

"Yea, I found her over there, behind that shed…she was unconscious when I got over to her, but there was some guy hovering over her that I didn't recognize. He ran away as soon as I called out to him, so I didn't get a good look at him, but she's barely breathing…"

It was almost too much for Nathan to handle. His fisted were clenched; looking down at Brooke's frail, limp body.

"Which way did the guy go?" He asked.

"The guy is long gone now…worry about her!" Haley screamed.

The three of them swiftly moved Brooke into one of the bedrooms. Haley propped her up using pillows, to make sure she wouldn't hit her head if she re-gained consciousness. She grabbed a washcloth and began wiping the dirt and blood off of her face.

Meanwhile Lucas was interrogating Nathan for answers.

"Why the hell was she out there all alone, half naked, sitting on a broken swing set, with an empty bottle of vodka and that videotape?" Lucas demanded.

"Because she wanted to, she asked to, to be alone! I didn't know she took the bottle or the video, and I sure as hell wouldn't have let her go out there if she wasn't dressed! She was fine when I let her go, I promise. You may not like me Lucas, and I don't blame you for that, but you've got to believe me…I would never let anything bad ever happen to that girl," he said pointing to Brooke, "she is all that I have left!"

"And the reason why she was sitting on that swing set," he continued, "is because that was where her and Peyton would sit if they were watching a storm roll in. Is she gonna be okay?"

Neither, Lucas nor Haley, knew how to respond to that, but what they both could tell was that Nathan hadn't been lying just then when he had said those things about Brooke. That was evident in his every move and expression.

Then Brooke slowly opened her eyes. She couldn't remember exactly what had happened, where she was, and it scared her. But the three faces starring back at her seemed so happy to see her that she choked back any tears that were forming. She looked first to Nathan, she could tell he was relieved to see her awake.

"Brooke," Nathan sighed. "You're gonna be okay, don't worry, it's over"

"What…happened?" She managed to croak out.

"Lucas found you out back, you were pretty bruised up, and hardly breathing, but you're safe now." Haley comforted her.

"But…what about a guy…I think I tried to fight him, but did he, you know?" She asked, as a tear fell down her cheek.

"I think I scarred him away before he could really do anything, but knock you unconscious." Lucas assured her.

"Do you remember what the guy looked like? I'd kill him if I had the chance!" Nathan interjected.

"Don't be silly, Nate…but no he came up from behind me, I couldn't see a thing, I'm sorry…I shouldn't have been out there that long, time just got away from me."

"Listen, you should get some rest. Can we call someone to pick you up, like your mom or dad, or someone? Or can we take you somewhere?" Haley asked.

Nathan and Brooke just quietly laughed to themselves.

"Nope, no parents in this time zone"

"Well, I can take her back to my place, my mom is there, and she'll probably be worried sick, it's almost 2 o'clock. You're my alibi." Lucas suggested.

"You don't have to do that, really…I can handle it." Nathan countered.

"Yea, and we've seen how that's worked out so far…" Lucas reminded him.

"How bout this, you take Brooke back to your place, and I'll stay back and help clean up here…that is as long as you can give me a ride back to my place afterwards, Nathan?" Haley proposed.

By then, Brooke had already fallen back asleep. So they decided on her behalf that Haley's plan was the most reasonable. Lucas and Nathan carried Brooke into the truck, and fastened her seatbelt. Nathan kissed her on the forehead, and left her with Lucas to join Haley in the clean up extravaganza.

"You really care about her, don't you?" Haley asked when he returned into the house.

"Yea…I told you, she's all I have"

"Well, you aren't the Nathan Scott I expected, that's for sure…so is that chance to get to know the real you still on the table?"

"Definitely."

….

Back at Lucas's house Karen was up waiting for her son to arrive. As she heard the squeal of the tire tracks in the driveway, she finally began to relax. Then, Lucas crept through the door holding Brooke. From the other room, Lucas could already hear his mother.

"Please tell me that you were somewhere in the land of no phones!" She yelled.

"I know. I should have called."

"Coming home would have been another, perhaps better, option."

"You're right. I'm sorry, but…"

"No buts, Lucas, you looked me in the eye, and you said: I can take care of myself Mom, what am I supposed to think now?"

Karen had now made it into Lucas's room. Her eyes immediately were drawn to Brooke, lying in her son's bed.

"Look, I can explain. But you sure you don't want to do this in the morning?"

"I've been up all night, one extra hour, won't kill me."

"Okay well, is there anymore of that coffee you're drinking?"

"Yes, go get you some and meet me in the living room."

…_**Cuz she's just the way she is, but no ones told her that's ok.**_

_**And she would change everything for happy ever after.**_

_**Caught in the in between of beautiful disaster,**_

_**And she just needs someone to take her home…**_

Lucas walked into the living room and sat next to his mother, beginning to explain the events of the night.

"I don't know where to start…" he sighed.

"How about with the girl who's occupying your bed right now?"

"Okay, we were all at Nathan's party, the one I told you about, and Tim, this guy from the team, put on this video tape," he said handing it to her. "It's of you and Dan at Homecoming…"

"Oh Lucas…I'm so sorry you had to witness that, I was young, foolish, and in love…I never thought anyone, let alone you, would see that."

"It's okay, really…but anyways, everyone was laughing…so I left the room, and I was pretty upset. Haley found me a while later, and explained to me how it was Brooke, that's who is in my bed right now by the way, who stopped the video, and the laughter. You should have seen her…I wish I had. Haley said that she was amazing, and for her to say something like that, it had to be. I only heard bits and pieces of what she was saying, but I did here her say this, toward the very end…"

"_The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart." She gave him her heart, and it was his own damn fault, not hers, that he pissed it away!"_

Lucas continued… "She said she admired you for taking that chance, and that made me realize how wrong I had been all these years. I've been so angry with Dan for the way things turned out, when all along I should have been pitying him, because he lost you! She made me understand that, for the first time. So I went looking for her, to thank her and all. And…I had just about given up, when I saw this guy I didn't recognize in the shadows, standing over something. I yelled out to him, as I ran over there, and he bolted…that something turned out to be Brooke. She had been beaten unconscious, and her clothes were half ripped off. I carried her back to the house, where Nathan and Haley were sitting. We moved her back into the house and waited for her to wake up. I know I should have called, but I wasn't thinking. She finally woke up, but her parents aren't in town, and she had nowhere else to go…I didn't know what else to do, I knew you would be here, worried…probably pissed, but here. And that's the truth."

"Well, as far as excuses go, that's pretty solid…and she seems like a nice girl, I'm just worried she's got too much baggage."

"Says the bag lady, herself." He joked.

"I know, you're right, I am the last person who should be judging baggage, I just, I want you to be careful."

"Listen ma, this might be hard for you to believe, considering the current situation, but there is nothing going on between us, trust me…we are way too different…she just needed someone, tonight, and I happened to be that guy…"

"Oh Lucas, for being so bright, sometimes you really just don't get it…"

...

You see, Karen said, someone once told me… "Two people are connected at the heart…it doesn't matter what you do, or who you are or where you live; there are no boundaries or barriers if two people are destined to be together…We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."

******The lyrics used for this chapter are from Beautiful Disaster, by Jon McLaughlin******


	4. I Bruise Easily

**All Those Years Ago**

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**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: This is my first ever fanfic, so reviews are always welcome, and loved! Thanks to those of you who have! I hope the story is starting to take off now. I'm major BLHN fan, love them together! **

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**I Bruise Easily**

…**My skin is like a map, of where my heart has been**

**And I can't hide the marks, but it's not a negative thing…**

Brooke woke up for school with a pounding headache. Though, with the weekend she had just lived through, a headache was a welcomed change. In fact, if it hadn't been for Lucas finding her the other night, she may not have even been waking up at all that morning.

Yes, Lucas Scott was Brooke's hero, even if he didn't want to admit that he deserved the honor. He rescued her, and now, she would have to find some way to thank him for that.

Just then Nathan's car pulled into her drive way. She rushed out of the house, grabbing a toaster strudel, and her book bag, on the way out. Nathan had been relentlessly over protective of her since Friday night's event, and as much as she loved that he cared, it was getting hard to bear his constant eyes on her. He would get over it eventually though, like he usually did. That was what she had hoped, anyways.

"Hey, hot shot!" Brooke said to him as she plopped herself down into the passenger side.

"What's up, how are you feeling?" He asked, concern still radiating from his face.

"Nate, how many times do I have to tell you, I'm fine, really…"

"Okay, I promise that was the last time, But seriously, I could have lost you. That makes a guy think twice about letting you out of his sight, so gimme a break, B!"

"I get it, I'd be the same way if it had been you. But Lucas was there. He saved me, you didn't lose me, end of story."

Nathan hated the fact that it was Lucas that had saved her that night, and not him. It wasn't so much that he wished to be the one to save her, well he did, but if it had to be anyone else, why Lucas? Now, he was this hero…her knight in shining armor, and what was he, her best friend…squat. He had to remind himself that he was lucky that someone, even if it was Lucas, had been there. Otherwise, he would be alone right now.

"Hey Nate, so what's the deal with Haley? Do you like her? I sorta sensed a vibe between you two…"

"Ugh…nothing really, she's great…I mean beautiful and smart, she stands up for what she believes in, kind, generous, everything you could want…but she's loyal to Lucas."

"So, make her un-loyal…if that is what you truly want."

"It's, well, it's complicated…there are histories there that even I don't wanna get into."

"Okay, is Nathan Scott scared to ask Haley James out? Am I going to have to make this happen?"

"Brooke you wouldn't dare…"

"You know I would…but I won't, your secret is safe with me!"

By then they had reached the school parking lot. Nathan parked the car and they both went their separate ways.

….

Classes today were boring to say the least. All Brooke could think about were her hypothetical plans to "thank" Lucas. She had already weaseled his schedule out of the school secretary, and found out that he had P.E. that period, which just happened to be the last hour of the day.

_Perfect,_ she thought. _I'll just slip on into the boy's locker room and surprise him while he is showering…just one problem, how can I make sure no one else is in there? I can't involve Nate, he'll be furious…_

With ten minutes to go in the hour, Brooke excused herself from her own classroom, and made her way towards the gym. She had decided to test her luck by peeking in but she couldn't see anything. Just then, a scrawny little freshman walked by her. He was about to let out a shriek of enjoyment when Brooke cupped her hand over his mouth, whispering…

"How would you like to help me do something? I'll make it up to you," She winked.

The boy was clearly smitten with Brooke, but after all that was to be expected.

"Umm…sure, what can I do?"

"Well, you know who Lucas Scott is?" He nodded. "Is he taking a shower?" He nodded again. "Okay, this is what you're gonna do…you're going to go back in, round up everyone besides Lucas, take his towel when it's all clear, and then come back out here and give it to me, okay? Are we clear?" He nodded one last time and headed back into the locker room.

Five minutes and several guys later, the boy came out holding the towel. Victory!

"Ohh," she shrieked, "You're the best!"

She gave him a light kiss on the cheek to thank the boy, and then darted into the locker room.

…**So I let down my guard, drop my defenses, down by my clothes**

**I'm learning to fall, with no safety net, to cushion the blow…**

Brooke didn't have much time to get herself indecent before she heard Lucas's familiar voice.

"Is anyone out there, who took my towel? Come on guys it's really not as funny the second time."

Brooke took that as an opportunity to make her grand entrance. She walked as graceful as she possibly could, wearing only a small towel, towards him. When his eyes fixated onto her standing in front of him, Lucas froze. Then he realized he was the one completely naked and covered himself up with his hands.

"Don't be shy," she said, "do you want my towel? It's the least I can do to thank you."

She slowly started to unravel her towel, waiting for his response.

"Wait, no don't do that…it's okay I'll get another one."

His eyes were now completely shut, he was squinting them together forcing him not to look at Brooke. Embarrassed by Lucas's lack of interest, she started to panic.

…**I bruise easily, can't scratch the surface without moving me**

**Underneath I bruise easily, I bruise easily…**

"Is there something wrong, a reason you don't want to look at me?"

"No, I'm sure you look perfect, fantastic in fact, but this sorta thing just isn't me, call me old fashioned, I guess."

Brooke, devastated, ran out of the room, throwing the towel in Lucas's direction.

"Here," she cried, and quickly picked up her scattered belongings, while slipping into her dress.

_What a disaster_, she thought, as she walked toward the tutor center that afternoon.

_Maybe he was right…had I gone about that all wrong? I mean, "naked Brooke" never failed me in the past, but Lucas…he is different. I guess, I was trying to thank him in a way that was me, and not him…darn nice guys, I'm back to the drawing table. Maybe Tutor girl, will have some tricks up her sleeve…_

…_._

The day was just another ordinary day for Haley; nothing special. She and Lucas had driven to school together, and now she was sitting in her last period class, Calculus, daydreaming about… Nathan Scott. Well that last part, that was something new.

_I am absolutely nuts having these impure visions of Nathan and I_, she thought. _Last Friday was surely a fluke; he couldn't possibly be interested in me. No, he is a playboy, always looking for a new lady to entertain him, and I am far from entertaining in the sexuality department. But, there is just something about him…I dunno, he wasn't nearly as bad as Lucas made him seem, actually…he was quite the opposite, he was charming, and sensitive, and hot damn, he was well…undeniably sexy. _

Then the bell rang, releasing her from her own thoughts. She couldn't believe the school day was over already. It had seemed to her like it went by in a flash, but that was probably because she hadn't been very focused on her studies. Haley then scurried to her locker. She knew that she only had a half hour before she was supposed to be in the tutor center to meet with Brooke.

To her surprise there was something sticking out of her locker. It looked like a note, maybe, but Lucas would have found her some how, and Brooke, well Haley was fairly certain that Brooke was too oblivious to know where her locker was. Actually, other than Lucas, most everyone was pretty unaware of her existence, and that of her lockers.

She did have to admit though, that Brooke was proving to be a stronger ally than she had ever expected. In fact, when she had gone over to check on her this weekend, Brooke was more pleasant than ever. She was so beyond grateful to Haley for taking care of her, it was almost insane. She had forced Haley to take a whole box of clothes, in which she had deemed, "would look better on Haley", as thanks.

_All I did was clean out and re-bandage the cuts on her back,_ she thought. _I guess they were pretty gross though, she must have fought back hard, while she was pinned down no less, to get the cuts and bruises she had. And apparently as macho as Nathan is, blood makes him pass out? Must be a Scott thing, Lucas gets the same way…_

She forced herself to open the door… slowly; she moved so that nothing would fall out, grabbing the small folded up pieced of paper. It read: **Haley…meet me at the pier off 2****nd**** street at 5' o clock, the picnic table…I'll be waiting, N. Scott.**

If it hadn't been for that little **N.**, Haley would not have been freaking out the way she was, since for as long as she could remember, she'd been meeting Lucas at that very spot. Why would Nathan choose to meet there of all places, it was so confined, no body ever went by there. That is why Lucas and Haley loved it. Nathan couldn't possibly know that, unless…

_Oh that's why,_ she thought, _stupid stupid me, opening up my big mouth, I told him that! No one goes there, yep…ugh…it's the perfect way to test out this little joke of a crush he has. And if Lucas happens to walk by, well then, all that much better for Nathan and his arrogant ass! I swear if he is using me to get to Lucas, I will rip him a new one! I mean every part of me says run…he's a monstrous ass… but I can't help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, the Nathan Scott I saw Friday, the one who was genuinely caring and charming, maybe that is a man worth fighting for…_

Haley decided that she would take Nathan up on his offer for one reason, and one reason alone, to put his extremely handsome ass back in place, once and for all! She was positive nobody else was gonna do it, so it was up to her. She prayed she would have the balls to do it, because every time she was around him, her clear perspective just got more and more fuzzy.

Just then Haley realized she had been standing by her locker for nearly thirty minutes. She threw all the books she needed into her bag, and literally ran through the halls, so she wouldn't be late. By the time she reached the center, Brooke was already in the back, at their usual seat. Haley waved to Brooke and quickly shuffled over to her side.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry…time got away from me!" Haley breathed.

Brooke was laughing hysterically at Haley. It was looking to her like Haley was a tad discombobulated. She might actually be able to distract her today, and Brooke needed that help, she needed Haley's insights into the mysterious Lucas Scott! Brooke was still a little bit shook up from the shower incident, and utterly mortified to express her inner most thoughts to Haley, but she felt like she could trust her, and the bottom line was… without her, she had absolutely no idea what made that boy tick.

"Okay Tutor girl, I love ya, and I know you are all…I'm math, nothing else matters, I mean business…but I need your help, so you're just gonna have to take a little vacation from being math today…and be well, be Haley, my friend…"

Haley was startled; she wasn't quite sure how anything she would have to say, as advice would matter. After all, girl problems were not really her forte, compliments of having had a male best friend all these years.

"Alright, here I am, Haley James, I'm listening, what's the major problem?"

"Well, you are going to die laughing, I just know it…but, I-- I made the biggest fool out of myself with Lucas, just now…I tried to thank him, you know in my own special way…and he like totally dissed me."

"That doesn't sound like the Lucas Scott I know, what did you do to thank him, did you give him like a card, balloons, or candy or something? He's not so much into the girly…"

"Umm well, that's the thing, I sort of went with naked Brooke?"

"What? What is naked Brooke? Well other than the obvious…"

"I'm not really one to deviate from the obvious, if you know what I mean…and I knew you would make fun of me!"

She said the last part while throwing a pencil at her, but by that point they were both laughing uncontrollably, so hard that the other students in the center were shushing them.

"You were laughing too, I couldn't help it...naked Brooke? What were you thinking?" Haley teased.

"I was thinking, as a matter of fact, that Lucas was a man, and men like naked female bodies, especially "naked Brooke", it's never failed me before, so I snuck into the guy's locker room, stole his towel to put on myself, and then I offered it back to him, with the added bonus of me being well, naked…"

"You've actually done this before? My god, I've gotta give you points for creativity, in fact I can almost guarantee he's never had a thank you like that before…but I'm going to go ahead and assume that this escapade did not end well?"

"He shut his eyes like I was an awful disgusting beast he couldn't bear to look at! Who does he think he is? How many men pass up a chance like that? Really…"

"Well, I don't have a clue about most guys, I think you, my friend, are more inclined in that department, but Lucas Scott… he's a self proclaimed gentleman; prose, manners, the whole nine yards. That's just how he is, annoying for the most part, in my opinion, but also endearing. He wasn't trying to offend you, he was respecting you…"

"So, what is he looking for?"

"Luke's old school, always has been…if you really want to thank him, do it from your heart, it doesn't have to be fancy…but please by all means, do it with your clothes on!"

…**I've found your fingerprints on a glass of wine**

**Do you know you're leaving them all over this heart of mine too…**

The two girls sat in silence for a minute, as Brooke took in Haley's advice. She had no idea how this "from the heart" business worked, but she was damned and determined to find out.

"Hey, I gotta run, I'm supposed to be meeting someone, can you let yourself out?" Haley asked.

"Oh yea, no problem, but don't think you are getting away so easy…who's the guy?"

"What guy? I said I was meeting someone, not a guy…see if I meant I was meeting a guy, I would have said some guy, but notice I said someone…so…"

"Woah, slow down there killa, you're definitely seeing a guy by the sounds of that defensive response…just tell me, is it Lucas? It's not Nathan is it?"

"Fine…I'm meeting Nathan, but…"

"I knew it, I knew it…there was a vibe, I knew it!"

Brooke was now twirling around the desk, pointing and singing, "I knew it."

"What do you mean a vibe, are you nuts? He's just using me to get to Lucas…I'm about ready to go give him a piece of my mind, actually." Haley interrupted.

"Okay, tutor girl…now listen to me, I may have struck out with Lucas, who is by the way, the most incorrigible SOB around, but I know a thing or two about "normal" guys, of whom Nathan is…and he likes you."

"And you are judging this by?"

"I don't have to judge anything, I know him like the back of my hand! Like I said before, he's an ass most of the time, a typical guy…and as a rule, Nathan Scott does not pursue anyone, he doesn't need to, girls flock to him…but you are different my dear, you are the exception. So I don't care if what he wrote to you was on a piece of toilet paper, with some shit still stuck on it, if he took the time to invite you, personally…he likes you!"

Haley just stood silently, starring back at Brooke. She didn't want to let on that she was pleased with this new information, but she had to admit, it sounded pretty wonderful to be considered an exception.

"So go on…go make his day, I sure as hell won't when he has to pick me up later!" Brooke reassured her.

"You are something else, you know that…not what I expected, but I'm glad I've gotten to know the real you…I like this Brooke Davis."

"Ha, yea…I'm just full of surprises!"

"And if you decide to keep your clothes on more often, you'll have even more!" Haley teased her, as she walked out the door, heading for the pier.

"Not fair!" Brooke called out to Haley, and then she was alone.

….

Haley had now made it within a hundred feet of the picnic table she was supposed to meet Nathan at. She was early as usual, so she took the extra time to clear her head. She remembered what Brooke had just revealed to her about Nathan, and she wanted to believe that Nathan was interested in her for the right reasons, but a little voice in the back of her mind was holding her back.

…**But if I never take this leap of faith I'll never know**

**So I'm learning to fall with no safety net to cushion the blow…**

There he was walking up to her. Haley glanced at her watch to see what time it was. She was ready for this, fully prepared. She wasn't going to take any of his crap. She wanted honesty, the real Nathan Scott.

"You're late." She informed him.

"Yea, sorry, I came straight from practice." He replied breathlessly, as if he had been running.

"Listen, before this goes any further, I want to make something perfectly clear, Nathan. I came here because I told you I wanted to get to you know, and I meant that…but if for even one second you try and pull that I'm Nathan Scott. Mr. Big Shot. Scoring my touchdowns…well you can work that on someone else because I don't care about that…"

"I don't even play football?"

"Whatever, that's not the point. It's just I'm already taking a huge chance on you because my instincts are screaming that you're full of shit, and if Lucas knew about this…just please don't waste my time, that's all I'm saying, okay?"

Nathan just nodded his head at Haley, resuming his poor attempt at opening up a Cracker Jack box that he had brought with him. When he had finally gotten the box open, he lifted it up in the air with his right hand victoriously. Haley just rolled her eyes.

"Dinner of champions!" He said jokingly, gesturing to the box.

"Riiiight…very nice."

He then stuck his hand inside the box, coming out with only a neon-beaded bracelet. He grabs Haley's left arm, and places it around her wrist, gingerly.

"Don't say I never gave you anything!" He said, smiling devilishly in her direction.

"Oh thank you, I will be forever, indebted to you." She said back to him, in her most sarcastic voice possible.

_He is just so damn charming sometimes it makes me sick,_ she thought. _Where does he come up with this stuff?_

"So," she interrupted the silence, "how is basketball going? I hear the team, aka you, are being rather hard on Lucas!"

"Just stupid hazing stuff, you know bonding, making him feel more part of the team…we all went through it."

"Yea, somehow I highly doubt that the "hazing" you received was as malicious."

"Ugh, I don't really know what that means, but sure…"

"Why don't you try to go a little easier on him for a change, for me?"

"I'll see what I can do…"

It was now almost 6 o' clock. Haley remembered what Brooke had said earlier about Nathan having to pick her up.

"Don't you have to pick up Brooke or something?"

"Oh shit, yea I almost forgot…thanks. Well, are you gonna be alright to get home?"

"Yes, I do it all the time!" She reminded him coyly.

"Okay …I'll catch you later then?"

"Sure, see ya."

As Nathan left, Haley sat contemplating and analyzing their conversation.

_He seemed interested, right? I'm not just making that up… and I put myself out there, for the most part, I mean I didn't try "naked Haley", but I think I was effective. I said what I needed to say…that's what's important. Oh, and I mustn't forget, he gave me this lovely bracelet, how kind…not!_

She then looked up from playing with the bracelet, to find Lucas standing over her shoulder.

"Here," he said tossing an empty can of spray paint at her, "you can give that back to your new friend, he left it at the river court."

Lucas started to walk away.

"Wait, Luke…I don't know what you're talking about?"

"Really? So we're into lying to each other now? I saw him here with you…"

"Yea I got that much…but what's with the can?"

"He didn't tell you that the team trashed the rivercourt? No, I guess it was just a message to me…along with the one that says I'm stealing your best friend right under your nose…nice touch, I've gotta hand it to him, but I never thought that you, of all people, would actually let that happen!"

"It's not like that, you've gotta trust me. I was only trying to help, I figured if I just talked to him, I could ask him to leave you alone…"

"Well, next time you ask him for any favors on my behalf, give him that can as a gift first. Tell him, either way he's gonna need it to paint over my scoring title in the gym, cause I'm taking his."

"Luke, don't be so dramatic. You sound just as bad as he does…do you think maybe- I mean, just maybe- he's had a change of heart?

"Hmm. Not exactly, that requires a heart."

Lucas walked off, leaving Haley once again alone at the pier.

_Why does this all have to be so complicated_, she thought, slumping into the bench, closing her eyes, and dreaming it all away.

…

By lunchtime on Wednesday, Brooke was near wits end, trying to find some way to make it up to Lucas. If Brooke Davis knew how to do one thing better than anyone else, it was getting a man's attention. That wasn't the case with her Broody and it drove her nuts! She'd tried her usual tricks, all of them, and nothing had worked! She even pulled out "naked Brooke", her trademark. Broody, he really messed with her head, and she didn't understand, why.

_Am I invisible to him? I know I don't stink so what the fuck? _She thought.

"Why is he not on his hands and knees begging me to sleep with him?"

That last part sorta slipped out, and immediately Nathan turned in her direction.

"Oops," She shrieked slightly embarrassed.

"Brooke, who could you possibly be after that doesn't want to get you in bed, Principal Turner?" he asked, chuckling to himself.

"Actually, your dad! He's a DILF ya know, dad I'd like to…" she shouted only to be cut off mid sentence.

"Disgusting Brooke, really, fucking sick, my dad, really…only you, B, only you," he retorted, shaking his head and laughing in disbelief.

Slapping his ass she replied, "I'm kidding hot shot, you're the only Scott I've got eyes for."

Amused with herself and the irony of her last statement she walked off, stopping only a few feet later to look back and flash her famous B. Davis dimpled smile, reminding everyone in the cafeteria just who owned that school. Nathan just rolled his eyes. He knew exactly what she was doing.

As Brooke made it out of the cafeteria, something occurred to her. She needed something that was special, and unique to her, but not, well skanky, was the adjective Haley had used to describe her last attempt. She had already consulted with almost any able bodied male she could get her hands on, but for some reason she felt, none of those guys held the key to Lucas. But, she did know someone who might…an unlikely source of advice, Peyton.

Brooke ditched her last period class and headed towards the park bench, where she often sat to talk to Peyton. Even though she was dead, and obviously did not speak literally to her, Brooke always felt like she gained something from Peyton when she sat in that spot.

So, Brooke sat peacefully, waiting for the spark of genius to hit her. And then it came to her. She remembered the music that was playing in Lucas's car the night he took her home.

_A mix tape?_ She thought. _Maybe? I'd have to borrow some music from Peyton's laptop, she always listened to that emo crap, I mean he wouldn't be impressed with my Britney Spears mix…Ooo…this could be it, thanks P. Sawyer!_

Brooke darted back to campus. She didn't want to be late to her session with Haley.

….

Back in the tutor center Haley was busy sulking to herself. She didn't even notice when Brooke walked up to her.

"What's wrong?" Brooke asked, taking her seat next to Haley.

"I had a huge fight with Lucas, he's avoiding me now."

"What was it about?"

"Nathan…"

"Oh, so you did go to meet him, then?"

"Yes, and it was a disaster, well not really the actual time with Nathan so much, more the aftermath when I got scolded like a school girl by my best friend for hanging out with his arch enemy…"

"Um yea, that sounds horrible, I'm sorry…I thought those two were over their petty differences?"

"Well, think again…apparently the team, led by Nathan, vandalized the rivercourt."

"The rivercourt? What's that?"

"It's this court in our neighborhood that Lucas and all the guys back there have been playing on for years…it's like Lucas's second home. I feel awful, I really thought Nathan was done playing these games!"

"I haven't heard anything about this, it sounds terrible…poor Lucas. Poor Nathan, after I get through with him, he's really gonna wish he didn't have a part in this!

"That's another thing, Nathan was with me when it all happened, but Lucas is right, it's his team, they would only do it if Nathan told them to…so he used me as an alibi, against my best friend! I couldn't even tell Lucas how long he was there because I was so ashamed, I'm the worst friend ever…"

"Well here's the thing, I've made a whole lot of mistakes in my time, for which I am not very proud of…but because of it I've had plenty of practice making things right. So I have an idea that I think might help solve both of our issues…so why don't you meet me out by Karen's Café in say an hour? I'm assuming we're canceling this session too, by the way…there are more important matters at hand…"

"Okay…I'm going with you on this one, don't let me down!"

"Never…"

Brooke walked out of the center and headed straight for the gym. She was going to rip Nathan a new asshole for this one! If he thought she was pissed about the video, well he had a whole new form of punishment coming his way. When she got to the gym, there was no pause; she just burst right into their practice.

"Nathan Royal Scott!" She shouted, as the team erupted in wails of laughter.

"Nate, your old lady seems pissed as a motha!" Joked Tim.

Nathan went over to speak with Brooke in private, he had a feeling this chat was not going to be a pleasant one.

"What's goin on? Why you so riled up?"

"Don't you play with me," she said shoving the can of spray paint in his chest. "Was this your idea?"

"It got out of hand, B…all they were supposed to do was write some cuss words on a few things."

"Well, a few cuss words turned into a fuckload of vandalism, and guess what, you are looking like the prime suspect!"

"I can't be held accountable for what the team does when I'm not around," He said to her innocently.

"Oh yes you can, that's exactly what your role is, this is your team, you are the captain…now, you fix it!"

"And how do you suppose I manage doing that, while I'm stuck in practice?"

"For starters, give me your keys…and secondly, give me the card, this one is on your ass Scott!" She instructed him.

Nathan shot into the locker room, and returned with the items she requested.

"What are you gonna do Brooke?"

"You'll see…your job is to get Lucas to the rivercourt after practice…and stall him if at all possible, we'll need all the time we can get."

Brooke walked out of the gym, and Nathan sighed to himself. He would definitely have his work cut out for him trying to gain Lucas's trust.

…

By the time both of the girls had met back up by the Café, it was just after 4 o clock. Brooke pulled up to where Haley was standing, picked her up, asked for directions to the rivercourt, and sped off. Brooke had already called up some construction guys, that she had charmed back when her parents were adding on an extra balcony to their massive master suite, on the way over. She figured, there was no other way to get it all done in time. Luckily, the men agreed to help with the restoration for only a small cost, which Brooke was happy to oblige, compliments of Nate.

Haley was nervous as they drove; having no clue what Brooke had planned. So, she just continued to pick away at her nails. She finally caved in, and asked.

"So what's the plan? Lucas said it's really bad, I doubt we can be much help."

"Well, it's your lucky day, sweetheart, because I've already called some big burly men to help us…we'll have this place back up and running in no time…well hopefully at least by six. That's when I told Nathan to bring Lucas by."

"This should be interesting…"

"Yea, I figure we can scram before that happens, you know let those two bigheads work it out…by the way, I talked to Nate, I guess some of the guys took it too far, but he said he would handle it…I told him he better!"

The girls laughed as they walked up to the court. It was a disaster area, but Brooke's guys had beaten them there, and were already making improvements.

"So, what can we do to help?" Brooke asked.

"Ah Brooke Davis, nice to see you again, and your little friend too…what's her name?" The creepy, snake eyed one said back.

"Frank pipe down, these girls are not even legal, and still way out of your league! Sorry about that ladies, why don't you just stick to picking up the trash…there are plastic gloves and bags over there…and if you get done with that, then we'll have you try to wash some of the paint off, but I think we've got it covered for the most part," Said the older gentleman.

An hour and a half later, Haley had become increasingly optimistic. From the looks of the guys putting away their stuff, the job was just about done. Brooke thanked the men for their hard work as they left, and gave them the money she had promised. Haley was busy admiring their accomplishment.

"Brooke, this place looks fantastic…it might even look nicer than before the team trashed it!"

"Yea, it does look nice…and I can tell why they love this place, it's peaceful. But, we'd better get going before the boys get here!"

They high-fived each other and drove back to Karen's Café, where Haley had to work that night. After a short moment, Haley thanked Brooke one last time, gave her a hug, and waved goodbye as Brooke drove off.

…

Haley would have been lying if she said she wasn't anxious to hear from Lucas. She was, extremely. She had hoped that after tonight, everyone could put the past behind and move on. She knew it wasn't that simple, but a girl has gotta dream once in a while.

…**Anyone who, can touch you, can hurt you, or heal you**

**Anyone who can reach you, can love you, or leave you…**

Just as she was scrubbing the counters to close up, Lucas walked in.

"Hey, I was beginning to think I might never see you again. You were avoiding me, right?" Haley asked him, sadly.

"I guess, a little. I was just so pissed about the court, and then I saw you with Nathan…and it just seemed to me like I was losing you to him."

"Luke that would never happen, I was just trying to help. You just jumped down my throat, without any warning, and we've always been able to talk about stuff, you know. I just had this crazy idea that if... you could see things from Nathan's side...and he saw them from yours well, sometimes you're just a real pain in the butt…but I love ya!"

"Yeah. At least we can still be honest with each other."

"Yeah. I guess we've always got that…"

"So, if something, anything were going on with you... whatever it might be, important or weird, or confusing... I mean, you could still tell me about it, and be honest with me, right?

"Yeah, of course."

Lucas then pulled out the bracelet Nathan had given her, and placed it on the counter, sending a quick "I caught ya" smirk in her direction.

"I think you may have left this at the rivercourt? Nathan seemed to believe it belonged to you?"

"You set me up! So he gave me a silly bracelet from a Cracker Jack box, it's nothing…I didn't think I had to tell you that, or that it would even matter to you…"

"You don't, and it doesn't…but it's definitely not nothing, judging by your maniac response."

He smiled and laughed lightly, but Haley still threw the wet rag that she was using to clean the counter with at Lucas, igniting a playful war between the two.

"Don't you start with me, missy!" He warned, as he made his way over to her side and squeezed the water on to her head.

"Oh you are so gonna get it, Scott!"

"I'll take note of that…and by the way, how did you manage to get the court fixed up like that?"

"Well, I had a little help, actually a lot of help, from Brooke. It was all her idea, her manwork…I just supplied the knowledge."

"Really, that's interesting…I wouldn't have pegged her for the hammer and nails type of girl." He pondered the thought. "Kinda a nice surprise…"

"Well let's just say that was her PG version of a thank you, and yes I'll admit the girl is full of surprises…"

"You heard about that?" He asked, laughing.

"Oh yea…you are one of many fine young men who have been officially thanked by "naked Brooke," you're the only guy, though, I think, who's forced her into early retirement!"

"Ha…I think I like the sounds of that…and what would this retired "naked Brooke" be called?"

"I dunno, here's something I've been working on for a while now, what about just Brooke?"

"Very funny…you should try stand up some time."

He said dryly, walking out of the café, turning back only to say these last words…

"And Hales, just so you know, the golden boy and I made a truce tonight…so just incase that silly bracelet, which is really tacky and unromantic by the way, _**is**_ something… you don't have to hide it anymore…"

….

By Saturday morning, Brooke had finally pieced together the mix tape she was going to give to Lucas. She had taken Peyton's top 15 songs off one of her "non-breakup" playlists, and created a kick ass mix. Brooke was pretty impressed with herself for making the mix, and even more with some of the songs she put on it.

_All emo crap is not crap_, she thought. _Some of it is actually pretty good. But making these mix tape thingies is hard! I don't know how Peyton would do this all the time, day in and day out, without going nuts!_

Brooke then turned her focus back to her delivery strategy. After seeing the rivercourt for the first time last Wednesday, she had fallen in love with the place. So she figured that it being Saturday and all, Lucas would more than likely be there with his boys playing hoops. Actually, Haley had accidentally slipped that little bit of information to her, without even knowing it, and Brooke was prepared to take full advantage.

…**I bruise easily, so be gentle when you handle me**

**There's a mark you leave, like a love heart, carved on a tree…**

Since their game today would have been all but impossible if Brooke hadn't stepped in to fix the court, and save the day, she felt as though she should at least be allowed to stop by unannounced. So she packed up her things, mix tape included, quickly handcrafting a note to go along with it, which simply read: **Thanks, Brooke**.

When she had reached the park, and saw Lucas out on the court, a part of Brooke became insanely nervous, actually all parts. Her whole body had begun shaking head to toe, like it never had before. She had never felt like this in response to a boy, it freaked her out. Brooke managed to gain control of her ever-building emotions, as she drove closer to the court. She decided, riding all the way up to them in her car would be the best tactic. It would give her a little extra, and much needed, security blanket, and it would also get their attention quite nicely.

…**So be gentle…**

Lucas and the guys noticed the familiar light blue Volkswagen bug, as it rolled up, but they continued to shoot around.

"Don't look at me dawg, I know she ain't here to see me," Said Skills, Lucas's wingman, on the court.

Lucas just smiled in Brooke's direction, mouthing "Thank You."

Brooke meanwhile had taken a seat next to another of Lucas's buddies, who was sitting on the sidelines.

"Hi, I'm Brooke…why aren't you out there with all them?" She asked, cheerily.

"Oh, Hey…the name's Mouth, and I don't play, I do the commentary, and you know announcer type stuff," He replied.

"Yea, that's where I know you from, you announce at the games, I've seen you a couple of times, you're good I hear."

"Thanks," He said with a shy smile.

"Hey so do you have a girlfriend? You're pretty cute, and I'm a fabulous match maker."

"Uh, me no."

"Okay, well…I've gotta run, but Mouth, will you do me a favor and make sure that Lucas gets this," She said, handing him the mix tape.

"Sure thing."

"Thanks!" She said, as she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "It was nice meeting you; I'll be on the look out for a lady for ya!"

Brooke then slowly back-peddled to her car, waving goodbye to Lucas and the guys.

"See ya!"

…

"You see," Brooke explained… "Katherine Anne Porter once said; 'There seems to be a kind of order in the universe… But human life is almost pure chaos. Everyone takes his stance, asserts his own right and feelings, mistaking the motives of others, and his own.'

So my question is…when it's all said and done, how do we pick apart the chaos, and find truth and happiness in our lives, or the choices that we make?"

"Well," Haley continued… "It is in the crossroads…the very moments that define the rest of our days. However, when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back. But, once in a while, we push onto something better; something found just beyond the pain of going at it alone…just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in, or give them a second chance. Sometimes you have to go beyond the quiet resilience of a dream, to truly discover who you are, or uncover who you can be. But, that person you want to be does exist; somewhere on the other side of hard work, faith and belief. And, it's there, beyond the heartache and fear of what lies ahead, that our greatest truth and happiness is found…"

******The lyrics I used for this chapter came from I Bruise Easily, by Natasha Bedingfield******


	5. Piece of Your Heart

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: This is my first ever fanfic, so reviews are always welcome, and loved! Thanks to those of you who have! I'm major BLHN fan, love them together!**

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* * *

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**Piece of Your Heart**

…_**I know you're trying to make me happy,**_

_**And I know you're doing it you're way.**_

_**And I don't always make it easy**_

_**To know the perfect words to say….**_

The bell rang, signaling the end of fourth period, and Brooke was more than glad to be getting out of English class. As she walked along the hallway, all she could think about was whether Lucas had liked the mix tape she given him. It was eating away at her. She had to know.

Just then, from around the corner she could feel that someone was following her. She could hear the footsteps speed up, until they were almost at her back. She swung around to meet whoever would be standing there, and to her utter enjoyment that person, was Lucas Scott.

"Hey, Brooke…I got something for ya." He said, handing her a book.

_Is he really giving me a book?_ She thought. _Well at least it's something right? I can work with it, I suppose._

"Of course you do, good-looking…" She said back to him playfully.

"It's that book I was telling you about, thought you might like to take a look at it…"

"Oh, yea I definitely wanna check it out…I suppose I could read the book too, but what are you gonna do for me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Here's how it goes, Broody…I read the book…you do something for me…"

She caressed his chest with the back of the book, licking her lips, seductively.

"Like what?" He replied, clearly intimidated by her outward sexual prowess.

"I dunno, something fun…you look like you could use a little fun, maybe even a little excitement in your life!" She proposed, cheerily. "Deal?"

"Ok…deal."

"So, should we spit and shake on it? Or…should we just make out now, and call it a day?"

Lucas just nervously laughed at her last remark; he smiled and walked away. Before he could get too far, though, he remembered he had forgotten the very reason he had given her the book in the first place…the mix tape, so he turned around to face her, now back-peddling away.

"By the way, I never said thanks, you know for the mix…I didn't know you liked Travis…"

"Oh yea, love him! He's totally the best!" She mumbled enthusiastically, though she had no clue what or who Travis was.

_Who knew emo music, and reading could be so much fun_, she thought, as she hugged the book to her chest. _Let me see now, "The Winter of Our Discontent," by John Steinbeck. It doesn't sound very good, but the house on the cover seems, sorta nice._

Brooke opened up the book to the first chapter and began reading.

_When the fair gold morning of April stirred Mary Hawley awake, she turned over to her husband and saw him, little fingers pulling a frog mouth at her._

"_You're silly," she said. "Ethan, you've got your comical genius."_

"_Oh say, Miss Mousie, will you marry me?"_

And that was all it took for Brooke to be hooked; the thought of it being a love story…or at least the possibility of it turning into her own love story, once she had held up her end of the bargain, that is.

…

Later, Brooke had caught up with Nathan, who was heading into the cafeteria.

"Where you goin, so fast, Hot Shot?" She catcalled at him.

Nathan stopped dead in his tracks when he heard her voice, and waited for her to join him.

"So, bone to pick with you, mister…where did you disappear to this weekend? I called you like a billion times; I even called your house…Deb is back? What's up with that?"

"Uh yea, apparently motherhood must be in style this season, she claims to be staying…"

"Like, for good, like you'll have an actual legit parent around?"

"I guess so, but lets be honest, when have D & D ever been legit, even when they were around?"

"True story, but she didn't really seem pleased to take my call, did she even tell you?"

"No she didn't but I hardly saw her, part of the whole "parent package," that I unwillingly signed up for this weekend, was a trip to the lake with Dan. We were supposed to be bonding…"

Brooke and Nathan were then interrupted by the lunch lady's hand, and her droning voice asking for money to pay for their meals. Nathan quickly offered up enough money for the both of them. Brooke had only gotten an apple and a diet coke anyways; after all, cheerleading season was about to start up. She wouldn't dare risk not having a flat and firm stomach come the season opener.

By then, the two strikingly beautiful brunettes had reached their table and started back up with their previous conversation.

"Yea, so how did that bonding go?".

"Well, that depends… do you consider ridicule and harassment, bonding?" He asked, harshly.

"Actually, I think the real question is whether or not you do, and you can answer that by looking at the way you've been treating Lucas lately."

"Dan is my dad, it's different…"

"Umm, hello…Lucas is your brother, Nate, it's not!"

"Ok. Point taken, really, though…since when did you become Dr. Phil?" He teased, shoving her playfully.

"I must be hanging around Haley, too much! Speaking of, is she still pissed at you about the rivercourt stuff?"

Brooke had hoped that the newfound Switzerland between Lucas and Nathan would have made it easier for Haley to get to know Nathan. She just knew there was magic between those two, but she was worried they were both too stubborn to see it.

"I called asking for her at the café the other day, and she answered, but when I said who I was she claimed to not be around. So either she's still mad, or she had momentary amnesia and forgot her own name, I'm going with still mad…"

"Yea, I'm leaning towards that too. I'll try talking to her, but you will have to put some effort into this, she's not just some hussy who's gonna throw herself at you!"

"I realize that, and I don't want her to be. She challenges me, when I'm around her, I want to be a better person."

"Okay then, I'll see what I can do…not making any promises though. By the way, I've been sort of talking to Lucas behind your back…"

"Nooo, I had no idea…" He said sarcastically.

"What? You knew?"

"I'm not an idiot, you know…and your little shower fiasco didn't help your cover any either."

"Oh, god…people have no lives of their own! But, now you know, and for the record I'm turning a new leaf…I'm into emo music… and books, yea books!"

With that, Brooke slumped over the table, and grabbed the book out of her bag. She opened it and started reading diligently, until Nathan placed his hand over the page.

"Wait explain this to me…you're pretending to be a book loving, Peyton now? Why?"

"I prefer Peytonesque. I'm just trying to connect on a deeper level with Lucas, and he happens to like that emo crap that Peyton used to. And he likes books, and gave me his to read…so we have a deal. When I finish reading this book, he does something for me."

"I'm no emo expert, Brooke, but I bet calling it crap isn't the best way to show that you're a fan? You should just be yourself anyway, if he can't see how wonderful you are without the emo, bookworm guise, than it's his loss."

_Sometimes Nathan was just sweet as pie, _she thought. _Maybe he was right though. I mean Lucas is going to find out sooner or later that we have nothing in common, if he hasn't already. But, the book isn't that awful so far, and a deal is a deal._

The lunch period was almost over at that point. Nathan had gotten up to throw their trash away, and Brooke had decided she should get a head start to her next class, that way she could find a good seat in back to continue reading. After all, the faster she got through with the book, the sooner Broody would be hers.

"Bye, Nate!" She called, as she walked away, holding the book tightly to her chest.

…

Brooke was glad to see Haley that afternoon. They hadn't talked since Brooke dropped her off at the cafe after cleaning up the rivercourt. There was so much to be discussed.

…_**You're always trying to solve the puzzle,**_

_**And you always wanna fix what's broke…**_

"Hey there Tutor girl, looking good today." Brooke said, trying to warm her up for the next topic, which was going out with Nathan.

"Okay, I can smell "buttering up" a mile away, what's going on?" Haley responded, matter of factly.

"So, what's your idea of a perfect date?"

"Brooke," she warned. "I don't know if it's safe for me to even answer this question, but I guess, if I must tell you… all I'd really need was a nice meal and good company, and well musical entertainment would be optional, but a definite plus…"

Brooke was shining ear to ear; smiling at the thought of Haley's perfect date.

_I could put the perfect date together for her easily_, she thought. _It wasn't like she was asking for a traveling circus or anything, I might even be able to throw in some surprises. I wonder if Haley would consider Nathan good company?_

"You had better not be planning anything!" Haley told her.

But it was already too late, the wheels were turning in Brooke's head, and there was no stopping it. Luckily, Brooke had an assignment due for Pre-Calculus that she needed help with. Otherwise, Haley would have probably drilled more onto the subject of Nathan.

After the two had finished looking over Brooke's assignment, Haley brought the subject up, once more.

"Should I be ready to be kidnapped by you for any reason, in the next couple of days?" Haley questioned.

"Well, if I said the answer was both yes and no, what would you think?"

"I'd think if you didn't make it clear to me what that means, soon, I'd pop you one in the eye!"

"Oh, okay, feisty today aren't we? Anyways, what I mean by that was yes, you'll be taken out by someone in the next couple of days, and if I were you I would maybe prepare a little, you know maybe do you nails or something…but no, it won't be me kidnapping you…"

"Then who is? You better not be sending me on a blind date or something!"

"Haley, relax…you know him, but you might rethink the blind date option after hearing who it is that I'm setting you up with."

With that Haley already knew. Brooke was finagling a date, and a second chance for Nathan! Haley tried to keep her cool about the situation.

…_**You keep searching through the rubble,**_

_**And never wanna let it go…**_

"Brooke! Why are you doing this?" She asked.

"He's my best friend, and like it or not, he's way into you…and deny it all you want, but you are too! I don't want you guys to be too stubborn to try."

"We did try, remember?"

"Give him a chance, this time, a real one… he's just as scared as you are, trust me."

Brooke took Haley's silence as non-verbal agreement. She was pleased with herself. Now all she had to do was finish that book so that Lucas would give her a real chance.

….

By Thursday evening, Brooke was nearly done with the book. She knew Haley was supposed to be working that night, so she had told Nathan he could wait to pick her up. Instead of her usual routine, Brooke decided to walk over to the café, for a quick bite to eat.

Upon walking in she noticed a certain brooding blonde in the corner. She hadn't expected Lucas to be there, sitting at one of the tables, but he was, giving her the perfect opportunity to let him know of her progress. She waltzed on over to the small table in the back, where he sat talking to an older man she didn't recognize. Lucas had been facing the opposite direction, so he couldn't have seen her approaching. As she reached the table, Brooke swooped down, at the same time as he was grabbing a slice of pizza from the middle of the table. Startled by her entrance, Lucas dropped the slice on the plate upside down.

"Hey gorgeous…sorry, didn't mean to scare you. Just wanted to let ya know…three more chapters, and you're all mine." She proclaimed, giving a quick smile to the gentleman across the table, and bouncing off.

Brooke went back to the front, looking for Haley, but it was clear that she was nowhere to be found around the café. So, the cheery young woman let herself out. Just as she was leaving she ran into Haley.

"There you are, hey!" Brooke said, as they proceeded to switch places, Brooke now outside and Haley in.

"Yep, here I am…like every Thursday night." She reminded.

"Well, I just wanted to stop by and say hey, since I was here later than usual, but Nathan's on his way, so I gotta run…I'll see ya later, hun!"

The last part Brooke said nearly yelling, because she had already gotten so far away.

Haley was at first, a little confused with Brooke's behavior, but after seeing that Lucas was there, things started to make much more sense. Haley decided to stop over at his table before she clocked in.

"Hey Luke, Hey Keith…so I just saw Brooke leaving in a rush, do you know what that was all about?"

"Nothing." Lucas explained, shaking his head, nonchalantly, and looking to Keith for reinforcements, which he obviously wasn't going to get.

"Well I have to disagree…that was definitely something." Keith corrected.

"She just wanted to let me know she was almost finished, with the book I gave her, that's all…you see, we sorta have this deal that after she reads it, I do something for her…"

"Ahhh…nice" Haley and Keith said in unison, while Haley turned to walk away.

…

By the next morning Brooke had read through the entire novel, and was more than ready to approach Lucas for her turn in control. Seeing as how it was a beautiful October day, nearly everyone was out in the courtyard. Lucas was walking towards the gym, a ways ahead, when she first spotted him. So, she sped up in his direction, hoping she would get close enough to stop him before he walked through the doors.

Luckily for her, Lucas was in no rush that morning and was just strolling along. That had given Brooke the advantage, and she easily caught up with him, matching his stride, while passing back the book.

…_**If you wanna give me what I want,**_

_**Listen, 'cause I'm gonna tell you what I need so bad…**_

"All finished," She said proudly. "Now it's my turn."

"Oh no, not so fast," he told her, "did you like it?" He asked quickly.

"Hmm, let's see… was our deal that I had to like it, or just that I had to read it? She clarified back, as he laughed at her refusal to discuss it. "The story is about a guy who loses his integrity, by giving into temptation…"

"Very nice, if I was your teacher I would have to give you an A+ for that concise book review."

"Well, teach…you picked an appropriate book, because that is exactly what I see you doing tonight, with me!" She declared, wryly, with her huge dimpled grin.

"Riiight," He sighed. "A deal's a deal, right?"

"You're damn right sweetheart, a deal's a deal." She repeated, very convincingly. "Meet me at Rocket Tap & Billiards, say around nine?"

"Do I need to bring anything?"

"Just that fine ass of yours, date," she answered. "I'll be waiting…"

"You know Brooke, you don't have to act like this."

"I know that. But you're the first guy to ever say it," she said placing her index finger on his chest, drawing an invisible line down the middle, stopping at his belt buckle, and turning away.

That move only left him wanting more…

"But uh, you keep doin your thing and, um, try to resist. It's actually kind of cute." She continued, looking back at him briefly.

Brooke, then walked off to class in a crush-induced delirium. _Looks like I've got my touch back, _she thought. _Tonight will be cake…Lucas is in the palm of my hand._

…

Haley was busy closing down the register at Karen's, when she remembered the last text message she had gotten from Brooke. The message read:

"**Be ready, 7 o' clock…I'm sending Nate, ur Date!**"

Haley laughed to herself, knowing that Brooke more than likely took an abnormally long time on that simple message, just so that it sounded clever. The Nate, ur Date part screamed out Brooke Davis. She had to hand it to her though; the girl knew how to put together an event.

Karen and Keith sat at one of the tables in the back, next to the counter. They were busy in lover's quarrel, not paying attention to Haley. It was a quarter to seven, and all the closing duties were completed. Haley wanted to tell herself that Nathan wouldn't show up, that she would get to go home and sit in front of the T.V. and veg out. Somehow she knew that Brooke would never have let that happen.

From working all afternoon, Haley wasn't the picture perfect prom queen that she felt Nathan would expect. Though, she knew no amount of soap and water could transform her into a princess now, she still felt obligated to at least try to clean herself up…just in case.

When she was satisfied with her improvement Haley tossed her apron on the counter, grabbed her jean jacket off the back hook, and started to say good-bye to Keith and Karen.

"Everything's put away, you guys have fun now…hopefully if I'm…"

And there he was, Nathan Scott, knocking on the glass front door. _So much for watching some CNN tonight,_ she thought, as she walked out to meet him.

"What are you doing here?" She asked him grudgingly, while she fiddled with her arm sleeves, out of nervousness.

No matter how mad she was at him, he still gave her butterflies, and all the nervous energy to go with it. She tried to play it cool, but the fact of the matter was, Haley James, was just not all that suave.

"Didn't Brooke tell you I was coming?" He asked sheepishly.

"Yea, but with Brooke you never know, I didn't think you'd actually come, to be honest."

"Why's that?"

"Well, I never pictured you as a pre-arranged date kind of guy…"

"So you picture me?"

"What? No! Um...I just...I needed something to say. And unfortunately, that's what came out."

"Riiight." He teased. "But, I'll be honest, this is mostly Brooke's doing, she set up this whole serial date thing; you know one card leads to the next," he explained, displaying the stack of cards he held in his hands.

"So, what does the first card say?"

"Convince Haley to go," He read, with his best puppy dog eyes ever. "So how am I doing so far?"

"Eh, not bad, but it all depends on what the second card says."

Nathan carefully opened up the second card, and read, "go to 1642 Clark Street, and pick up your next envelope…on your way share with each other 3 things that you like about one another."

"Ungh," Haley cringed at that idea, crossing her arms as some sort of protest.

_Giving Nathan compliments?_ She thought. _Really? Like he doesn't have a big enough ego already…thanks a lot Brooke! I'll remember to get you back to this…_

"Here, I'll go first. You're the most patient person I know, you don't go postal on me unless I'm being a real jerk and deserve it, and you don't treat me like some kind of moron, even though compared to you I am most of the time, and you're loyalty… I like your loyalty to Lucas, I mean I'm not always wild about how it pans out, but its cool…"

_There he went again with the dazzling_, she thought. _He basically called himself a moron, and it still managed to sound good coming out of him. Who does that? How does he do that? Unbelievable._

He continued, in her silence " Listen, I know it might not be my place to ask, but…we've never had the chance to have any fun together, I mean something has always gotten in the way…and plus this is Brooke were talking about, nothing she puts together is ever dull, we can bet on having a good time…"

"Okay, but if I want to leave I can? At any point, no questions asked?"

"Of course, trust me."

"Ha…yea, Cuz I've never heard that from you before."

Haley finally gave in and the two started walking towards their next destination. It was a nice quite night in Tree Hill. The kind where you could look up at any given point and see a million stars in the sky. But now, it was Haley's turn to list her three things.

"Okay lemme see, three things that I like about you…"

"My good looks," He interjected, cockily, which lightened the mood, and made her laugh.

"I like the Nathan Scott you become when you let me in, without the bluster and BS you give everyone else, and I like that you care about Brooke, you try your best to protect her, I admire your loyalty to her as well, and…I'll admit, you're not terrible to look at either…"

Just as Haley concluded her three things, they had arrived at their next locale. It was a fancy restaurant. The waiter sat them at a private table facing the pier and placed the last of the envelopes on their table. Both Nathan and Haley were a little nervous for what was to be asked of them from the next card, but they went at it anyway.

Haley opened it up and read aloud:

"Order your favorite dish for the other person."

"Any chance your favorite dish is prime rib," Nathan asked hopefully.

"Eh, no… we have a lot of that at my house."

Haley then went back to looking through the menu. Nathan, on the other hand, seemed to be a lot less at ease. In fact, he was rather fidgety, much more than his usual carefree demeanor showcased.

"I…I'm not really experienced with all this so, uh…" He explained, demurely.

"At ordering food?" She teased him, shamelessly.

"No, I mean…I never did any of this stuff when I was with Peyton, it was always just parties, and games, and drama…this is…different," He finally forced that last bit out.

Haley looked a little confused at his confession, maybe even a little hurt by the "different" comment, but she nodded.

"What do you mean exactly by different, like different good, different bad, different weird…there's a lot of ways a person can insinuate the meaning of different, and…"

"No, good, definitely good." He stated smiling wide. "I'm really glad you decided to come along."

….

Meanwhile back at Rocket Tap & Billiards, Brooke sat patiently for Lucas. She was wearing a sexy red tank top, hip hugger blue jeans, and a light black cardigan. It was the perfect combination of sweet and vixen. There was no chance Lucas Scott would be able to ignore her in that tonight.

When Lucas got to the bar, he seemed a little nervous.

_Maybe it was the atmosphere_, she thought. _I'm sure he's not used to hanging out in smoky, darkly lit pool halls._

After their quick hellos, the two found a secluded pool table in the back and began shooting around. Lucas was clearly impressed by her skills; he had already commented a couple times on how this surprised him. It was also apparent that there were a lot of things that he didn't know about her.

"Here you go, Gretchen and Henry, two cold ones," said the server, as she glanced at the two minors IDs, and walked off.

"Fake IDs," Brooke explained to a confused Lucas. "I used your yearbook picture, clever I know, right?"

Lucas just laughed, and resumed with the game.

"So what is it that I don't know about Brooke Davis?"

"A lot…like, for one I love it in the summer when I can sit outside and watch the heat lightening at night, and… up until the 4th grade I called squirrels, squellers…"

He smiled, it actually seemed like he and Brooke Davis might have a thing or two in common.

"And I love beating boys at pool." She concluded, while nailing the 8 ball in the pocket to seal her victory.

She looked up to see Lucas smiling ear to ear at her last remark.

"Oh my gosh, is Lucas Scott actually smiling, like could he be having a good time…maybe even having fun?" She mocked him.

"I have fun." He declared, trying his best to sound convincing.

"Sure ya do." She laughed, "Lucas, you're like the most serious guy I've ever met."

With that he turned to grab his beer, chugging it down to the last drip, and slamming it down on the table; proof of his ability to let loose.

"Ahhh," He said after finishing. "See, I can hang."

"Okay…we'll see about that. But, remember this is just the pre-game…and I bet you'll wanna be in top form for the main event…bottoms up!"

…_**If you wanna give me what I crave,**_

_**Hold me so I can feel your love…**_

Several drinks later the two were becoming quite chummy. They had discussed their mutual fandom for "Weird Science," even reciting a few favorite lines from the show in unison. By now they were gazing into one another's eyes, closer than they had ever been. There was a short moment, when it felt like nothing in the room moved, nothing else mattered.

"I'm really glad we did this," He finally said, with eyes still locked onto hers.

"Me too…so what's your take on tattoos?" She asked seductively.

"I dunno," He replied with intrigue in his eyes. "Depends…"

"Come here," she said grabbing his hand and pulling him into the corner. "What do you think, about…this one?" She asked, slowly revealing the tattoo of a Chinese symbol on her bikini line.

"That is…very, very, sexy," he replied, entranced by her wiles.

Then he leaned down and kissed her passionately. The sparks flew as their hands rustled over each other. Those two would be at it like that for a while.

…

Nathan and Haley were nearly finished with their meal. By now, they were fairly at ease with each other; that pleasantly surprised both of them. They could laugh and joke, but be genuine at the same time.

"I mean couldn't your favorite dish be lobster or something?" He teased her about her choice of meal for him.

"Are you serious? Mac and cheese is the food of the gods." She told him.

"Yea if the gods are 5 year olds…should we continue with the last card?"

"Sure…what does it say?"

"Tell the other person a secret that nobody else knows."

…_**Sometimes it feels like I'm raining on the inside,**_

_**And all the things that I'm trying I don't get it right…**_

Haley didn't exactly know what to say. She didn't really have that many secrets. It was weird though, at that moment she felt like she might actually be able to trust Nathan. His eyes were kind as she pondered her next move.

"Last spring I cheated on a Trigonometry test…my dad was out of town, my mom was sick and I had to take care of her. I didn't get a chance to study…"

"Wow…Haley James cheated…but, nobody found out, right?"

"No, but that's not the point. I felt so awful about it, knowing I didn't earn it. So, that's when I decided to start tutoring, you know sorta like penance…I dunno."

Haley looked down at her napkin. She felt like she may have revealed too much, but Nathan just continued to look understanding.

"No, I get it. I understand, see" He started to say, when a couple of the guys from the team walked up.

"Sup, Nathan" Tim said looking at Haley, amused.

"Hey, guys." Nathan replied.

"What's this?" Tim asked, chuckling to himself, and gesturing at the date like scenario in front of him.

"Well, you guys know Haley James, right?"

"Uh, yea…sure. Are you two on a date?" Tim asked condescendingly.

"No, dude, no…it's definitely not a date."

Nathan's words cut into Haley, in a way that she hadn't expected. She was hurt, but not weak enough to surrender. He had no right to treat her like that. She stood up, placing the napkin on the table, and addressed them all.

"Yes, not a date…and I was just about to leave anyways, so you boys can continue with whatever it is that you do."

She started walking away. She could hear them still.

"Dude, Nate…she was pissed. What did you do? Promise her a night of bliss?" Tim joked, while humping the air.

"Shut up, Tim…you don't know what you're talking about!" He responded, turning down his head.

The team then left, leaving Nathan alone at the table. Haley had been long gone by that time.

…

In Lucas's car, as he reached Brooke's house after their date, the sexual tension between he and Brooke was bounding. Though, something was bugging Brooke. As she sat in his passenger seat, she bit her lower lip, not knowing how to explain herself.

"So I had this idea." She finally said.

"Okay?" He said back, a little nervous. Her last great idea, getting a tattoo, was giving him a lot of pain on his arm at the moment.

"Well you know how I read that Steinberg book?"

"Steinbeck" He corrected, with a smile.

"Yeah, that guy. And then you did something that I wanted."

"Oh yeah, yeah, uh huh… would that have been… suffer through getting a drunken tattoo?"

"Haha, very funny…you know you wanted it! But, I'm thinking we should try that again…except, how about, the next time you do something you love, you bring me along, and then we trade?"

"What's going on Brooke?"

…_**When the craziness begins to get to me,**_

_**Just need a hand to hold, just be that somebody.**_

_**It's your tenderness that's gonna make it right,**_

_**I want a piece of your heart, not a piece of your mind…**_

"Nothing. I just. I want to know you better Luke. I want to know everything about you. And I want you to know...almost everything about me. You're the first really great guy I've liked and that really scares me…and I haven't been perfectly honest with you. I don't love Travis, that CD I made you was from Peyton's old playlist."

"I know," he said slightly laughing. "Well at least the Travis part…"

"How?"

"Well, Travis is a group…you said you loved him the other day."

"Oh my gosh…how embarrassing!"

"No, Brooke…that's what I like about you. You're different. You're interesting, in a good way, you make me laugh. And it doesn't matter to me that we don't like the same music…it may have been Peyton's music, but you made it for me, not her…it's the thought that counts"

"So, in that case, are you busy after practice Monday?"

"Yeah, I have a date with you."

He then gave her a kiss on the forehead, and she excused herself from the car. When she was safely inside her house, certain he could not see her anymore, she let out a huge sigh of relief; followed by multiple shrieks of excitement., and fist pumps

…

The next morning Nathan decided that he would go to Haley and apologize. He made his way over to her house, and began throwing rocks at the window to get her attention, and wake her up. Unknowingly Haley, had already been out for the day, and had walked up behind him.

…_**Love is a very wide open door,**_

_**You can go through every time you want more.**_

_**Why do I feel like the glass is half full,**_

_**When I've got enough of it to fill, a swimming pool…**_

"What are you doing, trying to wake up my parents? That's their room…" Haley said as she continued on walking, trying to ignore Nathan.

"Wait, Haley…I need to apologize, for last night."

"You should get a membership to Cost-Co, and buy them in bulk it you plan on handing out apologies like that."

"Will you just listen for a minute? I don't know how to do this, okay. I'm not like you…"

"What is that supposed to mean? You can't be one person all the time? You are only nice to me when we're alone, and that's not good enough for me!"

"I screw up a lot, alright." He sighed. "But, being around you, I just…I don't wanna be that guy anymore…"

"Well who do you wanna be Nathan?"

"I wanna be a guy that is good enough for you, I wanna be the Nathan Scott you said you saw underneath all the BS…"

"Well you should have thought of that last night! I mean, I put myself out there…I keep putting myself out there, and you just keep blowing it! And you know it's probably a good thing, because there isn't anything you could say or do at this point to surprise me…"

…_**Yeah, sometimes, I fall but I get up,**_

_**And it takes a while but I get there in my own time.**_

_**It's your tenderness that's gonna make it right,**_

_**I want a piece of your heart, not a piece of your mind…**_

With that Nathan did the only thing he thought could give him a fighting chance. He went in to kiss her.

"Except that…" She confessed, breathlessly. "You shouldn't have done that."

"I wanted to."

He smiled at her, and the two stood only a moment. Looking into each other's eyes, they both knew it was inevitable.

"Yea," She thought aloud.

Haley wanted it, too. She lunged herself toward him, enveloping him in her kiss. When they slowly parted lips, it was obvious that things would never be the same, for either one of them. It was as though forces up above were cheering them on.

…

Brooke and Haley sat that night looking up at the stars from their respective bedrooms. It had been quite an eventful weekend.

A very wise person once told me, Brooke thought, "Our best decisions, the ones that we never regret, come from listening to ourselves…"

"On one hand," Haley continued, "expectations can inspire you, but then again, they can really let you down…"

"I'm learning little by little that it's we who decide what our lives are gonna be…"

"Things happen to us. You can't know who will become your ultimate confidant, your soul mate, or your lover…"

"But it's our reactions that really matter…"

"I've recently become a real believer in not defining every single thing, every moment. Cuz, it seems like every time you think you've figured out what something is, it just becomes something else, and every time you think you've figured someone out, they just surprise you once again."

* * *

******Lyrics for this chapter are from Piece of Your Heart, by Natasha Bedingfield******


	6. Believe Again

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: Thanks to those of you who have reviewed, that's what keeps me going! You all by now, know, I'm major BLHN fan, love them together! This chapter, pulls in a bit of angst, but is full of some serious fluff. I had alot of fun writing it, and I hope you love reading it! Please do keep up with the reviews!**

* * *

**Believe Again**

…_**I was leaving footprints tainted by my past**_

_**On this winding road to you**_

_**I was praying for the light I see in your eyes**_

_**I had all but given up…**_

Over the past few weeks, things had seemed to be rather perfect. Brooke had her Broody, and Lucas had his Cheery, as he often called her. They were a complimentary pair, those two; opposites in mind, but equal in heart. Lucas had her experiencing things that she had once thought to be, lame, for lack of better words. However, what ever Lucas threw her way, Brooke had a knack for reinventing it, and dishing it back, in her very own way.

That was Lucas's favorite part. It had become a sort of game between the two of them. Lucas would show her something, about him, like say the time they went to look for a new book he had been hunting down in the library stacks. Then, Brooke would find some way of showing Lucas something about her. This often, if not always, led to a very steaming and passionate encounter between the two.

Yes, naked Brooke took a little sabbatical, but she was far from retired. And Lucas, though he had previously liked the idea of putting naked Brooke to rest, now loved the idea of having naked Brooke all to himself.

…_**Have you ever stared into the rain**_

_**Thought the clouds would never disappear**_

_**Have you ever screamed out into the dark**_

_**Thinking no one else could hear…**_

Haley and Nathan, on the other side of things, had also been enjoying the bliss of newfound love. Haley had proven to be a valuable ally and support system for Nathan, as his father tore into him time and time again about basketball. Nathan too, was able to help Haley sort through the mess of life, when it seemed her parents were having martial problems.

Nathan's home, his room to be exact, had become a sanctuary for the two of them; a place where their problems disappeared, and all that was left were two kids in love. Nathan's problems were now Haley's problems, and vice versa, but surprisingly they were each the perfect medicine for the other, and it didn't seem to faze either one. It was as if they were both pre-programmed with special emergency preparedness training for the other's catastrophic events. That feeling had been more comforting than anything. They had become each other's rock, and while their relationship hadn't taken it to the sexual level, it was still just as amazing.

It had also become quite nice that Nathan and Lucas could finally get along. In fact, the four of them had actually grown to be decent enough, if not good, friends over the past month. Lucas and Haley had been joining Brooke and Nathan at lunch everyday, and they had been out on a double date or two as well. It was feeling perfect for the two couples, almost too perfect… that always comes back to bite you in the ass perfect, but none of them cared.

Today, the four of them had entered the cafeteria discussing the upcoming holiday, Halloween. It had always been Brooke's favorite, and Nathan was increasingly grateful to Lucas for taking over in the costume-wearing department. Brooke however had a different idea when it came to all that.

You see, in the past, she always had to come up with some creative threesome idea to include herself along with Nathan and Peyton's costumes. Last year Nathan and Peyton had reluctantly agreed to go as Bill and Hilary Clinton, while Brooke had stood in as Monica Lewinsky. She was pretty proud of those costumes, all of her costumes actually, but this year she had the chance to be a couple, with her very own man on her arm. Let's just say, she was not about to let that opportunity slide by.

"You guys, this is perfect! Come on…Nathan you'd be Batman and Haley will be Poison Ivy, I'll be Harley Quinn and Lucas, you'll be my Joker!" She explained triumphantly.

The other three just growled.

"I dunno, Brooke…" Haley started to reject.

"Oh, no tutor girl, no you don't…Poison Ivy is way hot, if that's what you're worried about."

"Yea, I'm always worried about how hot I look," Haley replied, rolling her eyes, in a sarcastic tone. "I just don't get it, who the heck are these people we're supposed to be pretending to be?"

"You don't know who Batman is Hales?" Nathan shot back, amused by her lack of awareness.

"Well duh, I know who Batman is, I wasn't born yesterday, and I meant the girls…"

"Well," Lucas explained in his most informative voice. "Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn are both super-villainesses in the Batman comic book series. Poison Ivy is a plant loving, eco terrorist. She manipulates high-powered men, in order to save the environment. She also has a venomous kiss, and can entrance men, with the exception of Batman, by secreting pheromones. She and Harley become friends after both robbing a bank together. They become sidekicks, partners in crime. They are actually really popular…"

"Broody, tell me more, I just thought they looked cute!" Brooke squealed.

Lucas let out a hearty laugh and continued, "Well as suggested by her name, a play on the word "harlequin", she is clad like a traditional jester. She is a frequent accomplice and would-be-girlfriend of Batman's nemesis the Joker. Harley and Ivy team up for a number of successful capers, becoming Gotham City's "Queens of Crime". They have a sisterly bond I guess you could say. Ivy being the responsible one, demands that Harley stand up for herself, and Harley says something like 'I'm not a doormat — am I?' and Ivy replies, 'If you had a middle name, it would be Welcome.'"

"I'm not a doormat, am I?" Brooke broke in asking, with a mischievous pout forming on her face.

They all laugh at the irony.

"So, are you actually suggesting that we go through with this, whatever this is?" Nathan asked.

"Charade, it's a charade, and it's ridiculous…" Haley added. "You know way too much about comic books, Luke, you know that?"

"Hey, me and just about every other guy out there…minus this freak over here," he claimed, pointing to Nathan. "All I'm saying is if we were to go with this idea, it fits…that's all."

"Oh yes, we are going with this idea! This is even more perfect than I could have imagined! I'll have all your costumes ready, don't worry…and thanks Broody," she announced. "You'll have to tell me about my powers later," she added, whispering to Lucas, as she left the lunchroom.

"Yea…thanks Lucas." Nathan and Haley said grudgingly.

"Hey not my fault the girl has quite the imagination." He said back, while holding his arms up in surrender.

The three finished their meals and went their separate ways.

…

Today was one of those days that Brooke had been dreading for weeks. The first and only day of cheerleading tryouts. Normally, she would have been thoroughly looking forward to it. It was one of her favorite past times with Peyton, but this year like most things, would be different. It was hard to imagine going through it, with out her. After all Peyton was always her voice of reason. Brooke would have easily picked and chosen, at random, or based purely on looks.

…_**Have you ever spun out of control**_

_**Like you never saw the road ahead**_

_**Have you ever just kept looking back**_

_**Ever closer to the edge…**_

Luckily this time Brooke had convinced Haley to join her. Haley had not been very excited about the whole opportunity, judging a bunch of half naked cheerleaders based on some irrational set of standards, but she knew that Brooke needed someone there.

After the first couple, couple dozen, girls desperately tried to impress them with their awful moves and poor coordination Haley had begun to actually enjoy herself. Brooke on the other hand was becoming increasingly worried and testy.

"Hey, come on, lighten up…at least we won't have to watch Saturday Night Live this weekend, I mean this has turned out to be far more comical." Haley attempted. "If I had to pick one I would go with the Jedi, I mean come on, who can resist a light saber…plus if things get really desperate you can put him in costume as the mascot."

"Haley, this is serious…I'm not going to be looking like an idiot out there this year just because everyone in this school has somehow lost their ability to dance with rhythm!" Brooke shouted back. "What did they think this was the tryout for crap the musical?"

Just then, the door to the gym opened and a stunningly exotic redhead walked in, strutting towards the two girls.

"Rachel?" Haley responded surprised to see the girl.

"Haley? Is that you, really? Glad to see you've ditched the crocheted outfits since the last time I saw you…" The redhead replied, bluntly.

"Wait how do you two know each other?" Brooke asked, while alternating looks between the both of them.

Haley was not excited, in fact she was almost fearful, to see Brooke's reaction to her answer to that question. She was slightly relieved when she didn't have to be the one to tell her.

"Duh…I used to date her only friend, a shame too, he could have been so much hotter if he had only ditched her frumpy ass." Rachel accused, pointed at Haley.

"Lucas, you dated Lucas?" Brooke hissed.

"Yea, you're not dating him or something are you?" Rachel scoffed.

Brooke was beyond annoyed at this point.

_Seriously,_ she thought. _This is my competition, ugh. So Broody does have some skeletons in his closet. This skeleton happens to be proportioned very nicely unfortunately. Damn. I'm gonna have to play hardball, good thing I was born to play hard._

"Okay, you were late…and now you're just wasting my time, so let me know when you're ready, and I'll cue the music, and get the inevitable over with." Brooke finally said.

"Actually, I have my own music." She corrected, and made her way to the CD player on the stage, helping herself, and then beginning her routine.

The routine she had performed was quite sexual, but very good at the same time. Brooke and Haley had exchanged several glances throughout. Neither of them were happy about it, but it seemed if Brooke wanted to have a squad this year, Rachel was gonna be on it. When Rachel had finished, she looked up, thanked them, and walked off.

"We'll, be in touch. Do you prefer to be called by your real name or your stage name, I'm assuming you're a stripper after that performance?" Brooke added, before the girl left.

"It's Rachel, no stage name…and I hope so." She turned back to say.

When Rachel had finally left the room, Brooke turned her attentions to a nervous Haley, who had been running multiple scenarios of how Brooke was going to drill into her about Lucas.

"Why didn't you tell me that Lucas used to date Stripper Barbie?" She seethed.

"I didn't think it was important, she left years ago for California. I never thought she'd be back. Trust me, I don't know if you felt some non-existent love there between us or something, but I don't like that girl anymore than you do."

"Ugh," Brooke sighed. "Well our Halloween costumes are just going to have to be that much sexier… now that Slutty Mc Slut Slut is back in town!"

"What do you mean sexy, I thought the point was to be scary?"

"Sweetheart, not since kindergarten."

Sometimes Haley was so naïve it humored Brooke, but she was on a mission now. The four of them would have the most amazing costumes anyone had ever seen, and she'd be damned if they protested after these new circumstances, had arisen.

…..

Halloween had quickly fallen upon them. Brooke had stayed up vigilantly the last couple of nights piecing together their perfect outfits, and she had finally agreed to unveil them.

Having Rachel around at practices the last couple of weeks hadn't been easy for Brooke. It was impossible for her to admit that this ridiculously attractive, and overly confident, girl had once been with the guy that she was now falling so hard for. It was the unknown that scared her most of all.

_What if he wants her back? _ She thought. _I mean I couldn't really blame him, she's hot! Since when did Lucas like redheaded bimbos anyways? I thought he was only into the brunette kind…oh this is hopeless. _

…_**I believe the impossible is possible to overcome**_

_**I believe in miracles**_

_**Born from love in everyone**_

_**And I believe, I believe again…**_

Lucas had now made it over to her house to pick up his costume for tonight's festivities. The two hadn't really discussed Rachel, yet, and to be honest she really wanted to avoid the situation all together. Since finding out about her at the cheerleading tryouts Brooke had desperately tried to stay calm about the whole situation. After all, Haley had reassured her that Lucas was not the kind of guy to jump into a relationship with out heavy consideration, so she had nothing to worry about.

"Tada," Brooke said, holding up the purple and green "Joker" suit that she had made.

"Wow, Brooke…this is amazing, are you sure you didn't get this off the set from one of the actual movies?" He said, admiring her work. "You even made a self releasing playing card? That is classic…Thanks, babe"

Lucas gave her a light kiss.

"I'll pick you up at 8:00?" He asked walking out the door.

"Sure."

After Lucas left Brooke had become more and more upset. As much as she wanted to trust Lucas, there was a feeling in the pit of her stomach that made her sick. It was the feeling of being unloved. She didn't know how to explain it. It wasn't like she had been in a serious relationship before, but that was just the thing…she had never been in a real relationship before. She didn't know how this stuff worked.

Being in a relationship made her vulnerable. She was putting herself out there, for the taking. She was terrified that Lucas would break her heart. He didn't know how breakable she really was. He understood the pain of having a parent abandon them, but he also had a wonderful mother who loved him dearly. Brooke had no one. All she ever wanted was to be good enough, smart enough, and talented enough, pretty enough…just enough for someone to truly love her. She felt like Lucas was a good guy, someone who could fill that void, but maybe he too would let her down.

…

Haley and Brooke rushed to get ready for the party that night. Brooke had been all set before her friend had even arrived. Her outfit was fabulous as usual. She had taken the original outline of Harley Quinn's jester outfit and turned it into something that even Haley couldn't put into words.

She had attached a half black, half red corset top, to knee high tights in the opposite color of what was showing above. For bottoms, she wore only a simple pair of black satin boy shorts. She had also sewn white ruffles on to both the tops of the tights and her matching gloves. A huge, marvelous rhinestone necklace sparkled brightly; guiding peoples eyes to the cleavage the corset so beautifully showcased. Lastly, she had managed to part her hair in curly pigtails; one side sprayed with red glitter paint, and set it with wiring so that it fanned out like a jester's hat. Brooke's natural alabaster skin was exquisitely pale enough already, so all she had to do to finish off her costume had been to paint bright red lipstick onto her luscious lips.

Haley's Poison Ivy costume was equally as breathtaking. Even Haley had to admit that it was incredible. Brooke had sewn together a forest green body suit with corset bonding underneath it to hug Haley's curves in all the right places. She had her wearing sparkling lime green tights, and crushed velvet gloves. Brooke had also purchased a brilliant bright red wig, which lay perfectly in long wide spiral curls. Brooke had already hand applied hundreds of ivy leaves onto the surface of the top and her golden stiletto heels, and was continuing to stick them in various places, making a crown of ivy on the top of her head. Haley's eye make up was magical. Every shade of green had been used, making her beautiful brown eyes pop, and then her lips were lined tomato red and topped with golden glittery gloss.

"This is unbelievable, Brooke!" Haley shouted, having looked at the two of them in the mirror.

"I know right? I pretty good…I told you." Brooke excitedly replied.

"Pretty good, Brooke…I've never seen anything like this!"

"I just threw it together, once I got started it just came to me. You are easy to make beautiful."

"Well, thank you, but regardless, you should really look into designing or something, you are super talented."

"Thanks, Hales…that means a lot."

With that, the girls heard the horn coming from Lucas's truck and scurried outside.

…

At the party everyone was having an excellent time. Numerous people had commented on their costumes being the best they had ever seen, and for that Brooke was ecstatic. She had even almost forgotten about the whole Rachel factor, which had been looming above her. That had been the case, of course, until she showed up.

Across the dance floor, she was then standing, with her perfect modelesque body. Though, her costume had been nowhere near the caliber of any of Brooke's creations, it took only her presence to bother her. Rachel had shown up as Pamela Anderson. A pair of fake big boobs, skimpy clothes, and ratty blonde haired wig, made up her outfit. Brooke was unimpressed, to say the least.

…_**You bring me honesty**_

_**And that's worth believing in**_

_**And I believe**_

_**I believe again…**_

As much as Brooke was unimpressed with Rachel's costume, it still bothered her that she was even there. Every stolen glance between Rachel and Lucas seemed like it had been something more than it was. The proud brunette was going insane. She wanted to stay relaxed and not hyper sensitive, but she was. Everything about Rachel made Brooke want to rip her little head off. From a distance she might have been safe, but Rachel was more aggressive that Brooke thought, and she had paraded herself right on over to the four of them, who had been dancing in the corner.

"Hey Lucas, hey beaver," She said curtly, then focusing her attention to Nathan. "And who is this stud? When were you gonna come rescue me, Batman?" She asked, placing her palm on his chest.

Nathan immediately, lifted her hand from him, and Haley smacked it away before she had a chance to take it back.

"Ouch," She shrieked.

"That's what you get, now get lost… no one wants you around, Pamela…nice choice of costume, by the way…it suits you." Haley remarked.

"Actually, I came over here to talk to Lucas." She said, moving over to where Lucas and Brooke were standing. "So you are dating him, that's cute…my sloppy seconds"

"Enough Rachel!" Lucas warned.

"I'll stop if you come with me, I just want to talk."

Lucas looked to Brooke who was now busy glaring at Rachel. He didn't know what to do in his situation. He feared if he didn't leave to talk with her that it could get really ugly, but then again, if he did it…it could get even uglier. He decided that he would go, but only for a minute.

"Fine," He finally agreed. "This better be important, and quick"

The two walked off and over by the balcony. Brooke shifted her feet, nervously as she waited for him to come back. Haley and Nathan stood by her just in case.

"Why did she call you beaver?" Brooke asked, trying to get her mind off the fact that her boyfriend was momentarily absent with his tramp of an ex.

"My teeth," Haley explained, pointing to her two front teeth. "She always called me that, said I had buck teeth, like a beaver."

"Oh she's a witch, you so do not!" Brooke reassured her.

"I agree, I like your teeth." Nathan added.

Lucas had returned by then, and made his way back to Brooke's side, wrapping his arm around her. Brooke was stiff. She didn't want to let on that she was deeply hurt by his leaving her to talk with Rachel. Lucas could tell, though, even if she wouldn't say it. He realized with Rachel being around things would be much harder, but he cared about Brooke a lot. He wanted to be with Brooke, not Rachel. He just had to find a way to prove that to her.

…_**I'd lost my faith in love**_

_**Tonight I believe again**_

_**My heart was a broken place**_

_**Now I feel whole again…**_

As the night grew late, Lucas and Brooke excused themselves from the rest of the group. When they were finally alone in his car he confessed to her that he wanted to take her back to his place and show her something. Brooke was confused, but there was nothing Brooke Davis, loved more than a surprise. She agreed to go with him, and eagerly waited, as he drove the dark road. She had bugged him a few times along the way, but he would not give in. When they reached his house, he began to explain.

"Brooke, I know you don't want to admit that my past relationship with Rachel is bothering you, and I respect that. You just have to know that you are the one I want to be with now, not her."

By now the two of them were in his bedroom, and he was pulling out a stack of papers from underneath his bed. He handed them to her, and then left her side to allow her to look through them privately. At first she didn't understand what was going on. She felt as though she, maybe, had seen them before, but…

_How do these have anything to do with Lucas? Or, more importantly, why is he showing me a bunch of…drawings. I mean, they are not even really drawings, okay maybe they are, what do I know about art, but they aren't even completed? Half of them are torn up, and this one is so ratted up, wait, I know this one, that's me…I think? _

"What are all these? Are these Pa--," looking up at him through her eyelashes; he stood motionless a mere ten feet away, "are they Peyton's?"

Brooke finally asked, standing up confused, out of reflex to leave. Lucas nodded his head, while walking towards her. Now it had been her turn to stand motionless. She was upset, she didn't understand...

_If these were Peyton's things, why would Lucas have them? Surprises are supposed to be happy! If I wanted to rummage around in my sorrows, I could do that alone…trust me. I'm getting outta here. There's gotta be some explanation, though, I just don't know if I'm gonna like it. Cuz right now, I'm thinking the worst! Be calm, be rational, don't be a lunatic in love right now, just slowly walk away and if he follows…okay, he's not following, this could be the end, he could be breaking up with me! Damn could he walk any slower? Oh, boy…okay he's standing next to me. Oh no. He's leaning in and putting his arm around me…that's not a good sign is it? Can't he see I'm freaking out right now? Okay he's starting to say something, be quiet head, shut up! I'm listening here! _

"Wait, Brooke, hear me out okay." "Peyton had," he started to explain, pushing the hair off her face, and noticing the fear in her eyes. "She had thrown them away one day after sitting in the park, and I picked them up to return them to her. I'll admit, I looked through them thinking that I would become somehow connected to her, but throughout all of the drawings the only thing that stood out to me was you…at the time the Brooke Davis I knew was nothing like these drawings, but now I see you standing in front of me, and you are…you're brilliant, beautiful, and brave…"

Tears had now built up in Brooke's eyes. She honestly couldn't even believe this was happening. No one had ever said anything that nice to her before. He wiped away the tear that escaped, as it fell down her cheek.

"Do you really believe I'm… all those things?" She asked, now looking into his eyes.

"Of course, I wouldn't have said it if I didn't…you're gonna change the world someday, Brooke Davis, I don't think you even know it…but I just hope that you'll let me in so that I can be a part of that world, part of your world…"

"I love you Lucas Scott," She said through tears of joy.

"I love you too, pretty girl."

…

Brooke fell asleep that night starring up at her ceiling, deep in thought, and in awe of what had just transpired.

_So I once watched an episode of Felicity where in the end she says, "It's one thing to say you're gonna let go, it's another to actually do it--to loosen your grip and let yourself fall." _

_I let myself fall today. In the past, I've stumbled and picked myself up, and stumbled and picked myself up over and over again with no safety net, no one there to catch me. That was my safety net, not having anyone to count on, anyone to let me down. But falling in love. Sharing your life with someone. Giving your heart to another person to the extent that losing them could potentially destroy you. It's such a crazy thing to do…_

_I'd known it since the moment he kissed me, and maybe even before that, and as terrifying as it was to admit that, I couldn't deny it anymore. I didn't want to run from it, and I didn't want to let it run from me. _

_So, today I let it all in, and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't the greatest feeling in the entire world…_

_

* * *

_

******Lyrics for this chapter were from Believe Again, by Delta Goodram******


	7. The One That Got Away

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: Sorry it took me so long to get this chapter updated. I have been swamped with school work, and lost my Beta (so if anyone would like to volunteer I'm still looking), then I left for spring break, and came down with the flu. It's been a crazy couple of weeks! Anyways, this chapter has alot of storyline in it, and substance, which I loved grasping, but it was harder than I thought to write. I hope I did it justice, and you like it. Please review! Love!**

* * *

**The One That Got Away**

…_**Would you spare a minute?**_

_**Give me a single chance**_

_**To look in your eyes**_

_**Let me hold your hands**_

_**I want to get close enough,**_

_**To read you, understand you**_

_**Open up your heart**_

_**Open up your mind**_

_**I'm only here to help you, **_

_**Learn to love me, to know me…**_

Brooke had been blissfully sleeping, deep in a lovely dream of her and Lucas making out, when she was abruptly woken up by the sounds of banging and loud cavernous voices coming from downstairs.

_No one should be here at this time_, she thought. _We better not be getting robbed or something._

She then went to grab her robe, and took along a stiletto heel, the only thing she could find, to use for protection. Following the sounds, she ended up just outside her living room. Inside, she could see that there were two men picking up her grand piano. Just then the front door opened and several more men came inside. Brooke started to move towards them heel held up defensively in her hand.

"Stop that!" She shrieked. "Or else, I'll…"

"What are you gonna do babycakes?" One of the men said, as he checked her out. "I think I'd let you do just about anything."

"Sick, perv…in your dreams!" She grunted. "What is going on?"

"I dunno if your parents didn't tell you, or something, but we're supposed to take everything." Replied one of the men, who had just walked in moments ago.

"Everything? What? Why? That is mine!"

"Listen, little lady…I don't want any problems, okay? So maybe you could just get some clothes on, take what you need, and get on out of here…take up the logistics with your parents later. Okay?"

"Humph, fine…but make sure that creep stays away from my room!" Brooke shouted, pointing to the man who had harassed her earlier.

_..__**.Turn around, don't evaporate**_

_**Like you never came**_

_**Turn around don't be a ghost**_

_**Forever never there to haunt me…**_

The petite brunette rushed frantically around her room, finding her cell phone, and dialing up her mother. She was completely and utterly confused at this point.

_Victoria better answer her phone,_ she thought. _I mean, why would they be moving all of my stuff? This doesn't make sense, unless we're…_

"Mother…" She said, after several rings.

"Victoria, sweetheart, call me Victoria. And, I'm in the middle of something important so make this quick, okay?" Said her mother, from the "very important" hair salon & spa.

"Victoria, fine, whatever… did you know that I could have been raped by any one of these loser mover people guys that are like all over our house right now? They're taking everything! What's going on?"

"Oh, Brooke…quit being so dramatic, they are just moving our things to the new house…"

"New house?" Brooke gasped. "In Tree Hill?" She hoped.

"No, silly…LA, didn't we go over this? Your pathetic twit of a father actually got that job promotion. We can leave this rancid town. I thought we told you this? Hmm, must have slipped my mind. Anyways, we'll be leaving this Sunday. Your dad insists on driving, but I'm flying out…your choice. I've really gotta run."

"But…" Brooke tried, holding back walls of tears, but there was no use, Victoria had already hung up.

The once so cheery brunette just collapsed to the floor weeping, uncontrollably.

_California, that's like a million miles away,_ she thought. _Why are they doing this to me? And Sunday? That soon…how long have they known about this and forgot to tell me? This is awful, how am I going to tell Nathan and Haley…and Lucas, oh Lucas. Just when things were looking, uh figures…too perfect, never lasts._

When she had regained some composure, she stood up. Looking in the mirror one last time before walking out, she told herself that she would figure something out. She had to.

…

Tomorrow was the Tree Hill Raven's season opener for the men's basketball team. At a school like Tree Hill, in a town like theirs, there was nothing more important than a basketball game. For the students it was a chance to show their pride, for the residents it was a chance to show their support, and for the team it was a chance to show their greatness.

This year, Tree Hill fans had been even more hyped up than usual. At first it had been because it would be Nathan Scott's senior year, and fan's expected great things from him. Later, it had revolved around the controversy over new addition, and co-captain, Lucas Scott. However, most recently, it had been in anticipation for the unveiling of the Scott brother duo that had been making headlines. Yes, the Tree Hill Raven's star players were creating quite the buzz around town. After an impressive pre-season showing, some people were even gearing up for a state championship title.

"Dude," Nathan said to Lucas, as they moved to the bench press in the weight room. "I'm gonna be killing it tomorrow on the court…Dan won't be there so I figure I'll shoot for a season-high, just to piss him off."

"Where has he been lately, anyway?" Lucas replied, while laughing.

"I dunno, something about proving he's not controlled by basketball? Which we all know he is…but his lawyers must have told him to skip a game or two, I guess."

"Wow, for him that must be torture."

"Don't worry, he made sure to inform me that he bought a satellite dish to bring in the live feed. You know…so that he can still keep up with the stats…"

The two brothers shook their head in disbelief. Their father, Dan Scott, was something else, always cooking up some mischief or scheme. After Whitey had named both Nathan and Lucas co-captains Dan had been interjecting himself into their lives a lot more frequently, especially Lucas's. It wasn't something that either of them enjoyed. In fact, it had sort of given them something to bond over; an equal, ill disposition towards their father.

"So did Dan ever talk about me when you were little?" Lucas asked, as they switched places on the bench.

"Well, when I was younger I used to hear my parents argue about you. I knew you were out there. And I hated the fact so I hated you. I just thought what my dad wanted me to think. It sounds stupid now but it made sense at the time."

"Did you know he wanted joint custody of me? That's what he wanted to talk to me about the other night."

"Wow, didn't see that coming."

"So you think if Dan would have gotten his way, you and I might have grown up together?"

"What would that have gotten us, we might have killed each other?"

"Or, we might have teamed up against him?"

"Trust me, man; you didn't miss out on anything…"

…

After working out the Scott brothers went to check on their coach Whitey Durham in his office. He had mentioned to them at yesterday's practice that he wanted them to stop by in the morning. Apparently he had news to tell them. When they got there he was sitting in his usual chair at his desk, legs crossed up on a file cabinet, but something was starkly different. That day he held an article from a newspaper in his hands, and was studying it with piercing eyes. He didn't even flinch from the paper when Lucas and Nathan arrived. The boys couldn't imagine what, other than another article about the Raven's stellar year, Whitey could be holding. However they both knew an article like that wouldn't have left him emanating such distress from within.

The co-captains slowly walked closer toward their coach, being careful not to disturb him. He sat stone-like, not wavering from his position, facing the opposite direction of the door, and his approaching players. He appeared to be in some sort of a trance, almost as if a part of him was absent from the room. Regardless, this behavior was unlike him. In fact, Whitey was usually exceptionally observant. Sometimes so much that it would freak a person out, as if he had eyes in the back of his head. His years in the military had taught him to be on the defense and always ready for attack. Years later, this habit translated into one which most people would consider to be abnormal "civilian" behavior. However, while neither Nathan nor Lucas nor anyone at Tree Hill, for that matter, posed him an imminent threat, something he was perfectly aware of, those instincts were still deeply engrained.

As a coach and teacher, that super human ability to foresee and react quickly to situations had served him well throughout the years. In fact, under normal circumstances, Coach Durham would have, more than likely, greeted his players before they had even entered the realm of his office. So needless to say, today's events, and their bull headed coach's current demeanor, were chilling in contrast to what either one of the players would have expected.

"Coach?" Lucas and Nathan said in unison, finally breaking into the man's attention.

"Oh hey boys…sit down; I've got something to tell you." He sighed.

Whitey waited till the both of them were sitting, and turned to face the brothers with solemn eyes. Having refused to buy new reading glasses, he was forced, these days, to hold the old crooked pair steady with his index finger and thumb. He then looked up at Nathan and Lucas from behind his, un-framed eyeglasses, still half eyeing the newspaper clipping. He kinked one eyebrow in concentration, appearing very much torn, and lost.

"I promised Camilla I'd win 500 games then walk away. We were going to grow old together." The white haired coach explained, softly. Noticing their apprehension he continued. "And, if we win tomorrow night… that would be my 500th win."

"No offense coach, but you're already old." Nathan reminded him, smiling.

"And, you can't leave us now, I mean look at us," Lucas said, pointing between he and Nathan. "Did you ever think we'd get here? That's all your doing, coach."

The old man chuckled to himself at the obvious admiration his co-captains shared for him. Though, he particularly enjoyed the distinction between how Nathan and Lucas expressed those feelings. For two brothers, who shared such a talent in basketball, they were immensely different. Lucas, the broody one, had always been comfortable with his feelings. Nathan, on the other hand, tended to mask it with arrogance or humor.

_Never thought I'd see firsthand the outcome of my advice to Danny boy,_ the old man thought, after being reminded of his conversation with Keith, their father's brother, only month's earlier. _Keith was right; telling Dan to honor his scholarship, to leave Karen and Lucas, had been a miracle in disguise for them. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for Nathan…_

You see, to make a painfully long, and confusing story short, having taken Whitey's advice to pursue his basketball career years ago, Dan Scott had abandoned his pregnant girlfriend Karen, and eventually disowned Lucas, their child. Marrying Deb, his college girlfriend and Nathan's mother, soon after, brought him her family's fortune, which he quickly capitalized on. For several years the brothers had lived separate, completely opposite lives, much to Dan's pleasure, until Lucas joined the Ravens.

Back when Lucas had first joined it had been on Keith's request that Whitey kept him on the team. It wasn't that Lucas hadn't been a strong player, but at the time the team dynamics had suffered greatly because of the tension between the estranged brothers. The strain, however, had been the result of their father's relative involvement, or lack thereof, in his son's lives. Not until today, had Whitey realized just how ironic the situation he supported had turned out.

_To think, Lucas was better off not having his father in his life all along,_ Coach Durham laughed at the thought. _I guess it's about time I do Nathan a favor…_

The two Scotts sat impatiently, waiting for Whitey's response. Lost in thought, several seconds had passed before their coach's familiar husky voice broke through the awkward silence.

"Listen up, knuckleheads…I'm not going anywhere, just yet…" Whitey barked, moving to stand. "My replacement would have been your father, and I'm way to proud a man to let him reap those benefits, or destroy what I have built. Plus, you're right, you boys have come a long way, and I'll be damned if Ol' Danny gets in the way of that…"

The brothers just looked at each other and laughed, half out of relief, and half out of amazement. Neither could have imagined anything scarier than Dan Scott, their huge ass of a father, being coach of the Tree Hill Ravens, being their coach. They couldn't have been more grateful to Whitey if they wanted or tried.

"Thanks, coach…we'll make you proud, we'll get you that championship!" Nathan promised, as he grabbed his book bag to leave.

"Yea, coach…for real we'll make it up to you… and Camilla too." Lucas chimed in as they both left the office.

Lucas then started to walk in the opposite direction of their neighboring lockers. The break from habit caught Nathan's attention and he followed.

"Hey, where you goin?" He asked, after he was close enough.

"I gotta stop by Brooke's locker before class, what do you need a baby sitter now?" Lucas joked.

"Nah man, shut up, that's not even it."

"So, you gonna to tell me what happened with Haley? I'm assuming that is what this is all about?"

"Fine, you're right…so, let's just say she found out I was looking at some websites that don't exactly make me boyfriend of the year. Alright, not that it's any of your business, but um, Haley and I, we're not, I mean she's not, you know, so, I'm just trying not to pressure her that's all.

"Yeah, sure. Porn freak!" Lucas jabbed. "Just stay away from the sites with farm animals, alright? And let her know that you'd rather be with her than any of those girls…"

"I already tried that." Nathan told him, looking defeated.

"Really mean it." Lucas said, and then walked away.

"Thanks, I guess?" He called out to Lucas, sarcastically.

….

After school Brooke had decided to go meet up with Haley at the Café. She figured that of all the people she had to inform of her departure, the level headed girl she had grown to love so much in the last few months would be the easiest to break it to.

…_**Got so many questions**_

_**Feelings I can't explain**_

_**We're worlds apart**_

_**Don't even know your name**_

_**I'm longing to give you my heart…**_

Before Brooke could start, she noticed that Haley was upset about something. This may not have been the best choice of timing for Brooke to break the news to her.

"Hales," Brooke said lightly, placing her hand on her friend's shoulder. "What's goin on?"

Haley sat silent. She had been replaying the events that had taken place in Nathan's room after practice yesterday, over and over in her head.

"_Nathan, about last night?" _

"_Hey, look it's not about sex with me, okay? When you're ready, I'll be too." He assured her._

"_Sure, then what's this?" She asked pointing to his computer, which she had now pulled up with his stash of porn._

"_So that's what this is? You're worried I'm going to compare you to them when we…"_

"_Yes! I'm afraid that's part of it. Nathan it's hard enough for me to even think about being naked in front of you. And the thought that this is the standard I'm going to be held to? Forget it!"_

Haley remembered his face, as she stormed out of his room, slamming the door shut behind her. It was painful to remember him looking at her so hurt. Luckily she had been pulled out of her daydreaming by Brooke's question.

"Oh, nothing big." Haley promised. "Just a silly fight between Nathan and I…not your problem. So, what's up…what brings you here?"

"Well, um…I don't even know how to say this but, my dad got a job in California, and I'm supposed to be leaving with them Sunday."

"What?" Haley shrieked.

"Tell me about it, I woke up this morning with a bunch of creepy mover guys in my house…They took everything! I've got nothing to wear after the game!"

"Brooke!" Haley cried, clearly upset, wrapping her friend in a huge bear hug. "That soon? Have you told the guys?"

"Apparently, my parents forgot to tell me. I don't know how you forget to tell your daughter something as big as: were moving from the only home you've ever known, ripping you from the only friends in the world you have…but it's Victoria were talking about. And, about that last part…I was kinda hoping you could help me with that?"

"Hold that thought…"

Haley then went to take care of one last customer that had just come in, before closing up early, for game day. Brooke just sat in silence, running scenarios in her head. In the meantime, Haley had made another pot of coffee, and when she had finished cleaning she brought two cups back to the table where Brooke was now sitting at.

"Here," Haley said, handing her friend one of the coffees. "So, were you planning on telling them before or after the game tonight?"

"After! No way am I risking being responsible for a poor outcome." Brooke joked, trying to hold back her emotional breakdown that was slowly reaching the surface.

"Good point," Haley admitted. "Listen, I'll do whatever I can to help you tell them, but I sorta have my own favor to ask you…"

"Spill."

"Okay, there's this guy who's supposed to be in town for a while…I knew him from the music academy I went to this summer, and well he got this amazing opportunity afterwards, and he's on the road now touring, and well that's my like ultimate dream…and I just wanna see if I can run into him, you know, and ask him how incredible it is…"

"Well, what are we waiting for?" Brooke asked, jumping up and hooking arms with Haley, pulling her towards the door, then stopping abruptly. "This guy isn't like, you know "the guy" or anything is it? Cuz, seriously I don't think that Nathan would survive it if you left him too!"

"Oh no, it's not like that, we just had this great connection artistically…promise."

The two girls bounced over to the record store, where Haley believed he might have still been at, signing CD's, if they rushed. When they arrived Haley instructed Brooke to look through the stacks and look natural, as she was doing. Brooke tried to pump her for more information, but it seemed useless, her mind had already been focused in a different direction.

"Haley?" The young man asked surprised, as he turned the corner of the store, now standing directly in front of the two young ladies.

"Oh my gosh! Chris…What are you doing here? I haven't seen you since…" Haley responded, trying to act as coy as possible.

"Since camp, yes but…you know Chris Keller is big time now. Touring, partying…the good life. I'm headed out to my trailer now. Tons of ladies, like you two fine specimens are waiting for a some action, I wouldn't want to keep them waiting…but you two could always join us?"

"Oh jeez, I can't breathe…" Brooke choked out.

"Are you okay?" Haley asked sympathetically, as she watched him walk away.

"Yeah, sorry…I just couldn't breathe with that guy's ego taking up all the air in the room!" She shouted towards him, which got his attention.

"You know if I remember correctly you had some great pipes, Haley. I need a female harmony on one of my new hits…you wanna take a stab at recording?"

"Are you messing with me Chris, you wouldn't…" She warned, trying to gage his expression. "Oh my gosh, I would totally love to!" Haley let down her guard and shrieked, grabbing Brooke in excitement, and then noticing her overly anxious response she calmed down a bit.

"Okay, babe…well meet me tonight 7:30 at the studio." He said, and then waltzed out.

Haley stood next to Brooke bewildered. This was the most amazing thing that had ever happened to her, but tonight was the big game. She had to be there to support Nathan, even if she was angry with him.

_Maybe I could go for the beginning let him see me and then sneak out,_ she thought. _The recording shouldn't take that long? I could be back before Nathan even realized I was gone. Plus, he would understand. This is my dream._

Haley must have had a mischievous look on her face, because not long after Chris had left Brooke was speculating.

"Okay, Miss James…I know where you are going with all that brooding! I'm dating Lucas remember!" She joked. "Just, you know what, don't tell me…I don't want to know!"

The two girls left and headed off to the gym. Brooke had to be there early to cheer, and Haley wanted to get in some extra face time before she had planned to leave.

…

The arrival of the first home game of the season always brought with it a particularly good feeling; the feeling of new beginnings, but this year had been different. For Nathan, tonight's game was special because it would be his last year playing as a Raven. For Lucas it was because it would be his first. Together, this game was important, because it marked a new era, one that they would lead as co-captains. Tonight they would give Tree Hill fans their first look at what was to come…

Those two had come a long way since July, when Lucas had joined the team. Back then they had been two individuals struggling to find a common ground. Tonight they would be teammates, fighting for a common goal.

…_**Did you see me staring?**_

_**You caught my eye**_

_**Don't turn around**_

_**Don't walk away**_

_**The night is young, **_

_**can we get together…**_

As the game began Brooke and Lucas, and Haley and Nathan, both exchanged thoughtful glances. There was victory in the air, but there was also defeat. Though, the defeat was at the hands of Brooke alone, as she soon realized this would be her last game cheering as a Raven.

By half-time, when Haley had slipped out to go to the recording studio, Nathan and Lucas had already combined for 40 points, and had led the team to an over twenty point lead. In the locker room the tone was representative of that lead. However, while the rest of the team celebrated their successes, Lucas sat in the corner by himself. He couldn't help but feel like something had been bothering his girlfriend that week.

He felt confident that they had moved on from the Rachel situation. So, he knew whatever had been bugging Brooke lately, must be something else, something more. Just then Whitey had come in, and ushered the team together in a huddle. He gave his inspirational speech, as usual, and sent them back onto the court for the second half. Lucas was fortunate the game provided him distraction. Otherwise, he may have gone crazy trying to figure out why Brooke looked so blue out there tonight. Aside from the obvious factor that she was dressed completely head to toe in the color, as a Raven's cheerleader, of course.

Nathan on the other hand was fully engrained in his game. In fact, as he promised, he was only a few points short of a season high score. The entire game he had effortlessly dribbled around, shot past, and dunked over the other team's best players. Now, the Raven's were only seconds away from their first home victory this season. As the clock ran down, Nathan scanned the crowd for Haley. He wanted to share that moment with no one else but her, yet she was no where to be found.

After the buzzer went off, Lucas had run to Brooke's side, and they were happy together for the moment. Nathan only mere feet away was all alone. He briefly saw his mother standing in the distance, but he had been in no mood to fake nice with her right now. Instead he angrily stalked off to the locker room.

_Where the hell is she?_ He thought. _She couldn't still be mad could she? Is she okay? I swear I saw her there during the first half. So, why would she leave?_

Meanwhile, Brooke and Lucas stood in each other's arms. He had just put her down from flinging her around in celebration, and they were now looking dead into each other's eyes.

"What's going on pretty girl?" He asked sincerely. "I'm worried about you…ever since the other day you've just looked so distant? Is everything okay?"

…_**I need a hook so you won't be the one that got away**_

_**I need a look that stuns ya, makes you wanna stay.**_

_**Don't wanna speak in case it comes out wrong**_

_**Don't wanna blink cuz in a second you could be gone…**_

Brooke hadn't wanted to reveal the news to him in such a way, in front of all these people, but she felt that lying would only make things worse. She wanted to be honest with him. She didn't want to lead him on, and hurt him even more, but the reality was, inside, it was killing her.

"My dad got a new job in California. I'm leaving Sunday…I just found out the other day, but I didn't want to burden you with that before the game." She said, pausing to take a quick breath. "I don't wanna go!" She cried out, burrowing her head in his shoulder.

"What are we gonna do?" He thought out loud.

At that moment, all her walls of strength collapsed, and in his arms she wept.

"I really liked being the girl behind the red door," she whispered to him through sobs.

He wasn't exactly poised either. He couldn't imagine Tree Hill with out her. This news was devastating to both of them.

"Don't go. You can't go! I can't let you go, you have to stay, and we'll find a way…"

Lucas then held her in his arms for what seemed like eternity. When he finally released her, there was no sign of anyone else in the gym. The two lovers just silently walked out into the distance, hand in hand.

…

After the game Nathan had rushed to Haley's house. It was unusual for her to leave like that, and even more so not to answer his calls. He had been worried, but figured that she must have gotten sick and gone home to bed. When his girlfriend's sister was the one to answer the door, he knew something was up.

He knew Reagan James didn't come home from college often, from what Haley had told him. When she did, he had heard, it most definitely meant trouble. For Nathan, seeing Reagan face to face meant even more trouble. It wasn't until that very moment, when their eyes met that Nathan began to remember her. But, after the fact, there was no looking back. The mental puzzle pieces were being put together unconsciously.

"Hey there handsome, Haley doesn't mess around…you're… Nathan right?"

"Uh, yea. I was actually looking for her. Do you know where she is?" He asked, still studying the girl trying to figure out exactly where he knew her from.

"I just got back in town this afternoon, still haven't seen her. But, you're welcome to come in and wait with me?" The girl told him; as she bent down to pick something up, revealing a small scorpion tattoo on her lower back.

Nathan's eyes lit up. He would recognize that tattoo anywhere, and he knew he had better excuse himself pronto, before Haley did get home. Unfortunately, he was too late to make a last ditch exit. Haley was already walking up to them.

"Lil sis! Look at you!" Reagan shouted, moving toward Haley to embrace her in a hug.

"Reg, what are you doing here?" Haley asked, looking between her sister and Nathan. "And you too, what are you both doing standing on my porch?" She added, pointing to a speechless Nathan.

"Well I'm on break from school, and this hottie…which by the way, nice work sis…he stopped by to look for you."

"Oh," Haley replied. "Sorry, I'm glad you both are here, it's just…it was weird seeing you two together, I guess. But, uh Reg can you give us a second?"

Reagan closed the front door on the two of them allowing them some privacy on the porch.

"Hey, where have you been?" Nathan finally spoke, harshly.

"I was, uh, I was…recording…with a friend. He's in town and he needed a female vocal on one of his tracks and he asked me to do it last minute. I know I should have told you, but I just figured that I would be able to leave and get back before the game even finished."

"Okay, so who's the guy? The friend I mean?"

"Nathan, don't you blow this out of proportion! I'm not the one with the unnecessarily long list of sexual partners, or the fascination with porn!"

"Hales, all I asked for was the guy's name…"

"Chris…Chris Keller. Are you happy now?"

"Keller? Are you serious? That scum bag? Man, of all people."

Nathan continued to mumble profanities, pacing in circles, as Haley stood confused. He and Chris Keller had a sort of sketchy past over a situation between the two and Peyton. Before the musician had made it big he had always worked at his father's record store in town. It was one of Peyton's favorite spots to hang out and get away from Nathan and the rest of the world. While the curly blonde and Chris had an overall rocky relationship, they immediately bonded over a shared interest in music. For some reason, Peyton never seemed to see the snake in Chris, but Nathan did. During one of he and Peyton's famous "breakups" Chris had so conveniently stepped in on his behalf. The short-lived but wild, almost Johnny Cash, June Carter type lovers, had been very secretive with their affair.

Peyton had later confessed, only to Nathan, to sleeping with Chris. She was ashamed to tell even her best friend that the cocky artist dumped her cold after a couple heated one night stands. Considering Nathan's less than admirable actions through in and throughout their relationship, he took his girlfriend back, and forgave her. Out of consideration for Peyton's wishes he had agreed to leave the scumbag alone. However being reminded of it now, he vowed Chris Keller wouldn't be let off so easily again.

He then heard his phone ringing. The caller ID showed that it was Brooke calling. From their earlier conversation at the cafe Haley knew that it was an important call.

"Listen, let's just drop it, okay? You need to take that call…" She persuaded him.

"Fine." He scoffed, walking off, back to his car and picking up the call.

"What's up B?" He asked.

"Nathan…" Brooke barely let out on the other line, falling back into her tears.

"B! You okay? Lucas didn't…"

"No, of course not…I just, I've gotta tell you something, and I don't want to do it over the phone."

"Okay, I'll be right over."

Nathan then turned on the ignition, and sped off towards Brooke's house. For beginning on such a great victorious note, tonight had sure turned out to be more a defeat than anything.

…

Nathan reached Brooke's house within minutes. He slowly crept inside the door that was cracked open, and yelled toward her. The first thing he had noticed was the emptiness. Nothing was left.

_If they had been robbed there would still be things lying around_. He thought. _What's going on?_

He found her on the floor of her bedroom, crying next to her old dollhouse, the one she had always played with as a young girl. It had been the only thing she convinced the movers to leave behind. Her mother had always hated the thing, but it was Brooke's most prized possession, an exact replica of her home in Tree Hill, red door and all. Knowing she would have to leave this place, it was even that more special to her.

Nathan moved closer, and knelt down beside her. Instinctively, she moved her head into his lap. He slowly ran his fingers through her hair, trying to calm her down. She didn't have to tell him, what was going on, he knew. He was losing her, and from the looks of the place, it would be soon.

"Where?" He finally gained the strength to ask.

"California." She squeaked out.

"When?"

"Sunday."

"It's gonna be okay." He promised, though he wasn't all that sure of it himself.

"Let's go to our spot?" The teary eyed brunette looked up at her friend to ask. "One last time…"

"Okay, come on." He agreed, picking her frail body up off the floor, effortlessly, and placing her on his back, carrying her to his car. "Let's do this Davis…"

The two friends, made their way towards the Tree Hill Bridge, where they had often sat throughout the years. They grabbed a blanket, and the cooler of beers Nathan had chilling in his trunk, meant for the after party neither planned to attend that night, and got comfortable looking up at the stars. Nathan put his arm around her, and she rested her head on his chest, like the good ol days. They both wanted to stay in that moment forever.

…

The next morning Lucas had made his way over to Nathan's bright and early. Lucas was determined to find a way to convince Brooke's parents to let her stay in Tree Hill. The broody brother had one idea, but that would take Nathan's help, along with Deb and Dan's approval. Normally he wouldn't have dared to venture over to Nathan's home, but this was a circumstance for which the rules didn't apply.

…_**I need a twist to help me turn, turn this story round.**_

_**I need a bridge to cross this dangerous ground…**_

Lucas found Nathan sitting at the couch in his room playing video games. The dark one's eyes were completely bloodshot, as he robotically took his gaze off the television screen to look at Lucas.

"Get some clothes on man," Lucas yelled. "And wash yourself, you stink…"

"What does it matter? Haley hates me, or she will hate me…and Brooke's leaving. Dan's an ass, and Deb, she's on so many drugs she can barely see straight."

"You and Haley are still fighting? It was just some porn...right? I mean she was at the game, didn't look too pissed?"

"Well, she left...I went to find her at her house after the game, and she wasn't there. Her sister was."

"Which one?"

"Reagan?"

"Reagan?" Lucas laughed. "Dude, she's one crazy bitch!"

"Perfect _Dude,_ the thing is… when I saw her; I got that… déjà vu thing. You know like uh… like I'd seen her before?"

"Well, she was a senior when we were freshman so you probably saw her around school. She was head cheerleader after all, used to mess with Hales all the time." Lucas informed, smirking at the thought of Haley and Reagan together.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've seen more of her than that..." He sighed, remembering the uncanny tattoo he saw on her hip. "Two years ago, when they moved me up to varsity as a freshman… the seniors sorta threw me this insane party at my parent's beach house… Reagan was there."

Lucas putting two and two together smiled slightly.

"This is turning interesting, in a Tree Hill messed up kinda way." The blonde confirmed, after Nathan's nod.

"Yeah, I was… I was pretty wasted… and… she was… okay I'm just gonna come out with it. She was kinda the first girl I ever slept with."

Lucas immediately burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of the situation, and the predicament Nathan had fallen into.

"Great, yea laugh it up. You know what, why do I care? So I watched some porn, and slept with her sister...I didn't even know the girl back then."

Lucas kinked his eyebrow up in protest, conveying that his argument and defence wouldn't cut it with Haley.

"Yea, I know...I'm screwed." Nathan admitted. "But that doesn't change anything, so why are you here anyways?"

"We're going to convince your parents to let Brooke stay here. That way she doesn't have to move with her parents to California." Lucas explained matter of factly.

"Oh wow, you have it all figured out then don't ya?" Nathan scoffed, turning back to his video game. "In your dreams man, that'll never work. You don't know her mother. She's about the closest thing I've ever met to the devil..."

"Well good thing Dan is the devil himself..."

"Good point." Nathan replied unenthusiastically.

"Come on, man. I'm serious, it could work...but for real, I'm gonna need you to take a shower first, you stink!" Lucas claimed, pulling his brother off the couch and shoving him into the shower.

Nathan reluctantly obeyed, and cleaned himself up. The two brothers then plotted their attack, and went to find their father. While the task wouldn't be easy, sometimes Dan Scott would surprise a person by acting compassionately. Sometimes, their father even acted as if he were human with feelings and emotions. Though, most of the time, his true colors crept through to the surface. In this case, none of that matted. Dan Scott was their only hope. Quite a scary thought, indeed.

...

Sunday crept up on Brooke faster than she had been ready for. She was crushed at the thought of leaving Tree Hill, her friends, and mostly the boy she loved. Today she had plans to meet him to say goodbye. While she wished she could believe that everything would turn out alright, and that they would be able to keep their relationship together, long distance, she couldn't. The thought of not having Lucas by her side paralyzed her. She had never felt this way about anyone in her entire life, and it melted her very core.

…_**Meet me in the middle like I want you too.**_

_**I gotta find your heart to shoot my arrow through…**_

Walking to meet him that day, she prayed for a miracle. She prayed that her having to leave had only been a bad dream, and that she would wake up with another day to spend with Lucas. Unfortunately seeing her handsome boyfriend approaching her in the distance brought her back to reality, and confirmed her nightmares.

_This is it,_ she thought. _This is the end. I know he said it wasn't but…there's just no way to make this work 2,000 miles apart. He was just trying to make me feel better. Once I'm gone things will be different. But, you know what they say, "Tis better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all…"_

He was now only a few feet away from her. His blue eyes sparkled in the sunlight, making it that much more difficult to surrender to parting.

_People who are meant to be together, always find their way back in the end_, she reminded herself, taking in a deep breath to calm her emotions down. _Be strong…_

Lucas's heart broke the moment he saw her standing in front of him. He admired her valiant stance, arms slightly crossed, crutching her body tight as if letting go would cause her to collapse. He could tell she was trying so hard to put on a brave face, yet her red lined eyes gave away her pain. He knew that his pretty girl was doing so for his benefit, and it made him love her even that much more.

_You know, last year I didn't even know Brooke Davis,_ he thought. _Now I can't imagine my life without her… _

"Why don't we just walk?" He suggested.

"Okay." She peeped out, trying to contain her lips from quivering and tears from falling.

The two walked hand and hand for several blocks, without words. It was easier to just take in the beauty of the day than face the inevitable farewell that was approaching. They passed through the town, over the bridge, by the school, and now were approaching her old neighborhood. When they had finally stopped walking; now standing between her and Nathan's homes, a single tear escaped, and fell onto her porcelain skinned cheek.

"Are you okay?" Lucas asked her, gently wiping away the tear, then placing his hands on her shoulders.

"Yea, I'm fine. It's just, this whole time we were walking, I kept taking these mental pictures of everything, you know? Every time I see something in Tree Hill I realize it's probably the last time…" She explained, choking up at the thought.

"Yea, I get it." He assured her, now moving her towards Nathan's house. "Well, just make sure you make me look good when you take my picture." He joked, trying to ease the situation.

"Of course." She promised. "Where are we going, anyways? I already said good-bye to Nate?"

"We got you something, to remember us by..."

"Oooh. You know I love surprises!" She squealed, smiling for the first time that day. "So, what are _you_ gonna miss most about me?"

"I can only choose one thing?"

"Yes, and it has to be something good; not… how much you'll miss hanging out with me or how _hot_ I am! Cause that's a given."

The two stopped beside Nathan's pool house door, about go in, as Lucas pondered her request.

"Hmm… neither one of those, huh?" He asked, sarcastically.

"Nope."

"Well, I guess I'd miss the girl behind the red door." He finally said, smiling as he pointed to the red door behind him.

Brooke nodded, and smiled reminiscently of her days in Tree Hill. Lucas then placed his hand on the doorknob and gestured the brunette inside. Tilting her head in confusion she hesitantly followed his direction and entered the doorway. To her surprise it was now identical to her old bedroom in Tree Hill.

Inside was everything from her crystal lamps, to her lavish bedding. In one corner, was a small vanity, with her vintage silver mirror above it, and velvet stool below it. On the opposite side was a convenient area with a wet bar and kitchenette. Directly next to it was a beautiful glass dinner table, set up with deep red and purple tableware. However, most of all what continued to bring back her attention was her favourite dollhouse, front and centre. A small recessed light above shone over it making it the focal point of the room.

"This is all my stuff," she gaped, still admiring the essence of the room. "I don't understand."

"I…well, we," Lucas began to explain, nodding towards Nathan and Haley as they appeared from the bathroom. "We talked to Nathan's parents and they said that you could stay here till graduation, we fixed the place up, and Nathan got in contact with your mom. She didn't… want to, Brooke, but… Haley can be really convincing."

Brooke squealed out of pure joy, trying to take in all the glory.

"Did you pull your famous, 'I'm math, and math don't care speech on my mom?'" Brooke teased, turning to Haley with gratitude.

The four of them laughed at her comment, and Brooke then turned her attentions back to Lucas. Looking up at him through her deep hazel eyes, she moved closer.

"You did this for me?" She asked.

"I wasn't ready to lose you yet." The broody blonde sighed, shrugging to himself.

"_So_, you stayin or what?" Nathan asked impatiently, moving closer alongside Haley.

Speechless, Brooke could only nod frantically, at first. Looking around at the amazing friends, and boyfriend standing before her she fell at ease.

"Yeah, _of course_! You guys are the best!" She finally blurted out, as she rushed forward engulfing the three of them in a huge embrace, and closing in on Lucas's face.

"Oh… I so wasn't ready to be lost. Thank you." She whispered into her boyfriend's ear.

For that moment all was well. There was no need for banter, or foolishness. They had dodged a huge bullet, and celebration was in order.

"So, what do ya say...why don't we check out this mini bar?" Brooke pierced her eyes, and turned her smile into a more mischievous, and familiar one. They all laughed, and joined her lead.

....

Haley rushed into Karen's Café for her shift, out of breath from running. She had nearly forgotten all about working that day, but luckily at the last moment something had reminded her.

The past few weeks had been rough on Haley. For some reason the bliss between she and Nathan had worn off, and now it seemed nearly everything came between them. They no longer had each other for support. In fact, with basketball season in full swing, and Haley recording with Chris it seemed as though things were falling apart between them. The fear of being the one left behind had started to take its toll on both of them.

As a result Haley had begun to question her relationship with Nathan, wondering if they had jumped into things way too fast. Her passion for music had enveloped her entire soul, and Chris, unlike her boyfriend, understood that. That connection, their music, bonded them.

_I mean it's not like he shouldn't understand?_ She thought. _He has basketball. That is his dream, his music. Chris is offering me a chance of a lifetime! I would want Nathan to follow his dreams…why wouldn't he want me to follow mine? I just don't get why he's so adamant on me not working with Chris? He's harmless._

Breaking the sandy blonde out of her thoughts was Karen, who had just walked through the door. If there was anyone Haley could turn to for advice it was that woman. Through the years Karen had become a second mother to Haley.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" Haley asked, sheepishly.

"Of course, you know you can always ask me anything." Karen replied, taking a seat at the counter.

"Ok, so here's the thing, you know I've been recording with Chris right?" She paused, waiting for Karen's nod. "Well, I think I want to pursue my music more."

"And…"

"Meaning, I would focus only on my singing career. I am far enough ahead in my classes that I could finish out the year from home, and still graduate."

"Wow," Karen gasped. "So you are serious about this, huh?"

"Yea, I guess I really am." She proclaimed, almost surprising herself at her conviction. "The only problem is Nathan…"

"Listen Hales, never make a decision solely based on how it will affect someone else, you'll end up either regretting it or resenting them. Do what's in your heart. I've known you for a very long time, and you've always made the right choice. I am confident you will do the same this time."

"Thanks Karen, I can always count on you."

Karen smiled compassionately at the young woman standing before her, exuding an aura of confidence. It was something Haley needed to feel at that very moment, and it gave her the courage to dig deep inside and sort things out.

Luckily for Haley there were very few customers who had come in that night. Therefore, she had had plenty of time to weigh her options before leaving. Just as she had stepped outside it started to rain. Attempting to release her nervous energy she looked up at the sky, letting the raindrops fall over her. Busy enjoying natures shower, now soaking wet head to toe; she hadn't noticed that Nathan had approached her from behind.

…_**Sliding doors, they are just on a train**_

_**We're alone on a platform in the rain…**_

"Nathan?" She half-yelled, out of shock. "What are you doing? You're soaked!"

"So are you." He pointed out, with a smirk, then turning serious again. "I just went out for a run, and I guess this is where I ended up." He paused trying to find the right words. "So, I've been doing a lot of thinking…the thing with Reagan, it was a long time ago, I should have told you sooner, but I didn't know you back then, and it didn't mean anything to me, not then and not now…"

"Well, it did to me, okay? I can't be Reagan; I can't be those other girls in your porn! I just, I won't!"

"Listen, I don't want you to be…and I don't want Reagan, or any of those girls, I want to be with you...and I understand that you want to wait, so I will wait for you, with you…"

"Is that it?"

"You know, my pride says yeah, that's it. Just walk away and let Haley deal with the fact that she's clearly threatened by a sexual relationship. But my heart says, just forget about your pride you idiot. You love this girl, and even if you're going to catch pneumonia, standing out in the rain, you'll stay until she forgives you. So, what do you say Hales, come on, meet me half way here?"

…_**Theres a chance**_

_**And it won't come again…**_

"Nathan, I love you too, but I can't, I'm sorry. I forgive you, I do, but us, you and me were drifting."

"Is this about Chris?"

At Nathan's accusation Haley froze. She had thought long and hard about her decision, but it hadn't made telling him any easier, or less painful. In reality it was about Chris, but it wasn't her desire to be with him, it was the chance that he could provide for her; a chance to live her dreams. Nathan took her silence as an answer of yes, and put his head down in shame.

"Chris asked me to go on tour with him. A real, full-blown tour. It's a chance of a lifetime…I can't passed that up."

"I'm proud of you Hales, I really am. Good luck…" He said solemnly, as he turned to walk away.

"This is not about him…" She tried to reassure him.

"Either way, you made your decision."

"So that's it?"

"Yeah...shoulda listened to my pride." He mumbled as he walked away, leaving Haley standing alone in the dark rainy night.

….

Nathan slowly walked home in defeat. He took one last look at the girl he loved, taking a mental picture for memory's sake, and continued on. It seemed as though only moments ago life and meaning were clear to him, and he had direction. However, all of that would soon leave with Haley.

…_**Turn around your whole life has changed…**_

He thought about the verse, which was written on Haley's favorite picture frame:

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same."

Nathan knew without a doubt his life would never be the same. It was how he would manage it that he was afraid of. He couldn't go back to the way things were before. No, now he was really alone. He began to believe Peyton had been right all along, "that people always leave," but in this case, he felt people always left him.

At the same time Haley had crawled into her bed, exhausted from the nights events. She had knots in her stomach of both nerves and excitement, as she sat restlessly writing a few quick lines in her journal. Before putting her head down to sleep she scribbled:

_Gilda Radner once put it this way, "I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." I have my chance, right in front of my face, and I have to make the most out of it. I don't know what's going to happen, if it'll be the right choice in the end, but I know I have to do it. I'm going to go on tour with Chris Keller. There, I said it; it's on paper, no going back now…_

_

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*****Lyrics for this chapter were taken from The One That Got Away, by Natasha Bedingfield. (I just noticed this is my 3rd chapter using a song of hers, apparently I am writing an album fic, lol!)*****_


	8. Is Anybody Listening

**All Those Years Ago**

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**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: Again, I am sorry I have not updated as frequently as I started off. I hope all of you who are reading my story continue to do so regardless, and enjoy it just the same. This chapter has some bad moments for Brucas, so I am forewarning. Don't worry though, we all know how meant to be couples end up. With that being said, I am in the process of graduating, and finding a full time job, which is why my writing has been slowed. Until something changes in that department I can only promise that I will not abandon this story. I also wasn't as diligent in my editing process, trying to get this chapter up quicker, so I hope it isn't terrible. I need more reviews though, if you can spare the time. This is my first story so I'm sorta going at it shooting into the dark. Your input would be a great help. Thanks so much to those who have reviewed. Please continue! Hugs.**

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**Is Anybody Listening**

…_**Been waiting to see the light**_

_**Been waiting up all my life**_

_**Show me your way**_

_**Wont you show me your way…**_

Leaves were turning red and yellow all around the scenery of North Carolina's eastern coast. Radiant fall landscapes were in full effect, and Thanksgiving was right around the corner. For most of the nation this time of year brought about togetherness, gratitude, and appreciation for life's great wonders. However, for Nathan Scott, it didn't feel as though there was much left to be thankful for. Sure the Ravens were off to an amazing, undefeated season, something he had imagined his whole life, something only months ago would have been the single most important thing in his life. But none of that mattered to him anymore. Haley had brought to his life a sense of direction; a greater meaning. When she left she took all that they had built along with her, or maybe it all just crept back inside of him.

The worst part about the whole situation was that deep down he admired her decision. Underneath it all, he wished he had had the courage to do what she had, to walk away from the only place she had ever known, and follow her dreams. She made that decision all alone, and as much as he despised Chris Kellar for taking her away, he knew that his influence was only secondary, like his own had been.

Haley James had the ability to stand on her own two feet. It was the very thing that had drawn him to her in the first place. From the moment he had locked eyes on her, the night at his beach house, her inner confidence and ability to recognize honesty, and true self-worth, had always been unbelievably beautiful to him. Whether or not she appeared as coordinated as he might have, say on the basketball court, or comfortable as Brooke in her own skin, she was solid in her convictions. That fact had been proven on several occasions. Her absence made it that much more obvious to Nathan that he lacked a true sense of identity, or purpose.

Was basketball really his dream, or had it been his father's relentless attempts to relive a missed opportunity that he had been chasing all his life? At what point had it all changed, and gotten so complicated? Because, right now, it sure didn't feel like it was his dream to relish anymore. He didn't feel the rush of excitement he had anticipated for this journey. It actually felt more like he was living a nightmare, one that he didn't control, and wasn't ever going to wake up from.

"Beep, Beep, Beep!"

The sound of the obnoxious clock radio drilled over and over in his head before he found the strength to maliciously slam his hand down upon it, and stop it. Returning to his former idol position, he laid limp, arms stretched from side to side.

_And here begins another day, another round of hell._ He thought. _I live a pointless life of pointless existence._

He realized there was no escaping it. Life must go on as pointless as one believes it to be. Though, if he could he would have remained in his bed for the rest of his life, avoiding the inevitable chaos, with irreverence.

As if perfectly planned to interrupt this self-induced pity party, his bedroom door burst open. Without further warning his cheery brunette of a best friend jumped on top of him, straddling and poking him on the bed, to gain his attention.

Since Haley's untimely departure, Nathan had been fairly catatonic to the rest of the world, but even he could not deny the contagious energy that emanated from Brooke Davis. He never could. No matter how pissed off he was he couldn't help but leak out a small smile at her.

"Get up, you lazy bones!" She cried. "Do I have to do everything around here?"

That last comment wasn't entirely off the mark, as hard as it would be to imagine Brooke Davis running around the Scott house like a little housewife. Yet in all actuality, once Brooke had moved into the pool house, she had basically assumed the responsibility of keeping the place, and Nathan afloat.

It wasn't as though there were many other options. Dan was god only know where, and Deb was doing god only knows what, all the time. This wasn't a familiar role that she had found herself in. In fact, just about everything in all their lives had flipped upside down. Normally she would have hired some sort of labor service to do the chores, but she didn't have that luxury anymore. Luckily Deb hadn't accosted all of the help. There was still someone to manage the heavy duty cleaning. And thank goodness, because she couldn't have fathomed the idea of getting her hands dirty, or clean, in work like that.

Against his better wishes, Nathan had grudgingly followed Brooke downstairs into the kitchen, and began pouring himself a bowl of cereal. Everything he did these days was out of pure habit. For Brooke it was like she had a zombie for a friend. Despite the occasional smile here and there, in response to her crazy antics, Nathan was pretty much lifeless and mute. It killed her to see him like that, and she desperately wanted to help, but she didn't know how.

If it hadn't been for Lucas, and her new job, she would have more than likely gone nuts by now. Luckily for her, most of her evenings were now spent at Karen's Café. As much as she hated to admit it she was somewhat grateful to Haley leaving. She missed her friend greatly, and hated the way it caused the people she loved the most such pain, but it gave her a much-needed opportunity. See, when her parents had agreed to let her stay in Tree Hill they had on one condition; that she get a job, and support herself. While it wasn't the picture perfect rich girl lifestyle she was accustomed to living, at least she got to stay. If she didn't have that job, she wouldn't be here. Plus, it beat sitting around watching Nate robotically play his Nintendo all day and night.

After what had seemed like an eternity, the two of them made it to campus, and were about to walk into their first period class, English. Brooke couldn't remember the last time she had actually looked forward to being in class. This excitement was clearly an exception to her normal rules. She would have appreciated any distraction at this point.

"Why hello there, Mr. Scott." Professor Hamm mocked to Nathan as he strolled to his seat in the back of the classroom. "Nice to see that you could join us today. What has it been three weeks now since you've graced us with your presence?"

"Leave him alone," Brooke quietly begged, not knowing what state of mind Nathan was in, and if that comment would set her friend off.

…_**I wanna come out of the dark**_

_**But breaking away is so hard**_

_**Show me your way**_

_**Just show me your way…**_

Their teacher obeyed and went back to teaching the lesson as she had planned. Nathan on the other hand plopped into his seat unamused. Immediately Lucas turned from the seat directly in front, and proceeded to look his disheveled brother up and down.

"Nice to see you sorta pulled yourself together…" The broody one finally spoke after appraising the mess sitting before him.

"Yea, smell me," he dared. "It only gets worse. The only reason I'm here is because that one," he pointed annoyingly at Brooke, who was smiling brightly in victory a few desks away. "And my Playstation broke."

"Figures," Lucas mumbled under his breath, chuckling in response the explanation.

The last time he had visited Nathan he had been cooped up in his bedroom playing that damn video game, NBA Shootout. He assumed it was only fair that it broke after so much use and torture. At the same time Nathan grabbed his bag, pulled out a bottle of Colt 45, and started to drink it. In shock, Lucas and Brooke tried to contain the situation.

"Nathan, are you nuts?" Brooke hissed.

"Seriously man, who are you? Afroman?" Lucas teased him. "Put that away!"

Nathan just ignored them both and returned to minding his own business, and causing mischief. Unfortunately not long after, Ms. Hamm began one of her usual walks down the aisles, and made her way over to his desk. Noticing the bottle, she impatiently waited over him, arms crossed, and wanting answers.

"Tell me you are not drinking beer in my classroom!" She finally yelled when he had no answer.

"Technically, its malt liquor." He corrected her, cockily, in the process of standing up.

"Where do you think you are going?"

"Me?" He gestured to himself, the only obvious suspect. "Oh, don't mind me, I was just about to leave. But, uh…hey I think you missed a button on your shirt, very sexy though. If more teachers started dressing like 50 cent hookers more students might actually come to class…"

Ms Hamm stood red faced, and speechless. Trying to perform damage control over the situation Lucas immediately sprung into action and caught up with Nathan just as he had placed his hand on the doorknob to leave. Watching Nathan walk out, in his most sincere voice, Lucas made a last attempt to clear the air.

"Listen, ignore him. He hit his head in practice yesterday and now he thinks he's lil Wayne in a music video or something. I apologize for him." Lucas blatantly lied, trying to earn points for being entertaining at the very least with his explanation.

"Whatever," She said rolling her eyes. "Make sure he finds his way to Principal Turner's office. I'm sure he'll enjoy that poor attempt at an excuse you just fabricated in his defense."

Lucas nodded his head and darted off to find Nathan. Brooke sat restlessly in disbelief for the remainder of the period until she could escape and go find her boyfriend and self-destructing best friend. Until that moment she hadn't realized just how messed up he really was about this whole Haley leaving situation.

…

Lucas made his way out of the gym after practice that evening. As he walked to his truck he began mauling again over the horrible situation that Haley had put them all in. That very same subject had been on his mind constantly since he had found out that she left.

You see, before that, for as long as he could remember back, they had had only each other. "Lucas and Haley," that was it, just the two of them. Up until that school year it had always been those two up against the world.

He admitted to himself that the last couple months had been rather wild, a whirlwind if you may. Actually, that was for sure, but it didn't excuse her actions. From joining the team, Haley befriending Brooke and then her falling in love with his former archenemy and brother. It had all been crazy. Not to mention Brooke nearly being pulled away from all of them to live with her parents in LA. Everything had seemed to go by so fast, and at this point nothing really seemed out of the ordinary.

Sure, getting a record deal and leaving to go on tour wasn't something that just happened to anyone, and he knew that. He was so proud of his best friend he could barely stand it. He wanted to tell her that. He knew what a big deal, and dream come true it must have been for her. Hell, she talked about it to him for 15 years now, ever since she could wail out a tune. So really, it wasn't that he wished ill upon her, or wanted her to give up and come home. He just felt she should have left in a different way. She hadn't even told him she was considering leaving, and then just all out of the blue she was gone? No visit, no phone call, no good bye?

He wouldn't have tried to make her stay, or even try to change her mind. All Lucas had wanted was the chance to have said good-bye. When it all came down to it he was just hurt that she didn't give him that opportunity, and he couldn't help it. That was the truth, and things just weren't the same without her around. He then realized if it was this hard for him, it must be even harder for Nathan.

All that inner debate and turmoil caused him to be less observant while he had been walking. He had almost reached his car without knowing. Yet as he started the engine, and adjusted his rear view mirror, an object, a person, staring back at him from the backseat, stunned him. For a second he thought he might be hallucinating.

_There is not a naked woman in my back seat,_ he thought. _Please tell me there is not a naked woman in my backseat that isn't Brooke Davis. I can't deal with any more drama._

"Hey there, puddin." Rachel spoke seductively. "I noticed you and that pathetic excuse of a girlfriend haven't been attached at the hip lately…something wrong?" She asked anxiously.

"Uh…no, Rachel, what are you doing naked in my backseat? Get some clothes on!" He demanded, throwing clothes toward her, and trying not to look again in her direction until she was fully decent.

"Geez, Mr. I'm a Lame…it's not like you haven't seen this set before, and at least when you and I were together we had fun." She reminded him with a smile and a long caress to the chest.

"Yea, and look where that type of fun got you…" He reminded her back, stressing the fact that she had a son as a result of "too much fun."

That had been the reason, or rather what had caused her to leave Tree Hill before. She got pregnant at 15, and had to hide it. Lucas only knew this because Rachel had opened up to him about Parker at the Halloween party last month. She claimed to feel obligated to tell him after leaving unannounced all those months ago, but she assured him the little boy was not his.

Once his buxom firecracker of an ex got out of the car and had walked off he started to peel out of the parking space. Before he could make it too far something caught his attention, and he stopped. He bent down to pick up the shiny black patent object lying on the floor. It was definitely a girl's wallet, but he didn't recognize it, so it must not have been Brooke's. He had a feeling it was Rachel's, but to be sure, he decided to take a quick peek inside, looking for some sort of I.D.

The first thing that his eyes were drawn to was a picture of a little boy, most likely Parker. He couldn't help but pull the picture out and study it. After sitting for a moment looking at the photo, he forcefully returned it to its proper place in her wallet. He tried to forget the look on that little boy's face, but he couldn't shake the feeling that part of him was staring back.

_She promised Parker wasn't mine_, he thought frantically. _It couldn't be…_

Lucas then drove off to the Rivercourt where he knew Nathan would still be at, most likely drunk by now. He didn't want to admit it, but damn if there were ever any reason to drink it would be over what he had just convinced himself of, that he was indeed a father. More appallingly, he was a deadbeat father like his own had been, absent. The thought was nauseating.

…

Brooke hadn't had much time to visit with the boys after this morning's incident. She had hoped that Lucas resolved the situation, but Nathan was a hard head when it came to certain things. His pride was definitely one of them. What the fair skinned girl didn't know was that he had given up his pride, had surrendered it all to Haley, and from where he stood she had thrown it back in his face by leaving.

When school had ended, like she had now for the past few weeks, she took Nathan's car and headed over to Karen's. After today's events though her mind had hardly been there. All she could think about was Nathan. She messed up nearly every order that was given to her, and the worst part was she didn't even realize it half the times. Karen finally had to ask her to take the night off.

Embarrassed and upset she slowly took off her apron and agreed to sit down for a cup of coffee with her raven-haired boss. It was odd for her having someone, a mother figure, around to talk to. Brooke had always been convinced that she could light herself on fire and her mother wouldn't have noticed, or cared. With Karen it was different, a nice different. She was more of a real mom to Brooke than Victoria had ever been. Even the first time they had met, under the worst of circumstances no less, she had been kind and concerned towards her. Now knowing that she was trusting her with this job, knowing how important the café was to her, it terrified Brooke. She wanted nothing more than for Lucas's mom to trust her, and her actions today were quite the opposite of what one would expect out of a stellar employee.

"So what's goin on sweatheart?" Karen began, touching Brooke's hand. "You seem distracted, to say the least."

"It's just this whole thing with Haley leaving. I mean I miss her and all, and so does Lucas, obviously, and I feel terrible, but Nathan…he's taking it the hardest. He's worse than I've ever seen him before. I dunno what to do. Today I forced him to go to class with me, after not showing up for weeks. I thought that would be the best thing for him, and you know what he went and did? He brought this gigantic bottle of beer, and started drinking in class…"

"Oh my, that isn't good."

"No, it's not." She said, looking down. "Lucas has been trying to be there for him, looking out for him, I've basically been bathing, and clothing, and feeding him. He's been so pathetic. I just, I can't keep…

That was the straw that broke the camels back. She sucked in hard; trying to forced the tears from coming out. Karen instinctively moved closer, placing her hand on Brooke's shoulder to comfort her.

"All you can do is be there for him. You're not his mother…"

"I know, but that's the thing. Him and me we don't have great mothers like you that step in and make things all better. After Peyton died we promised to take care of each other, no matter what. But it's like I'm not enough, ya know, I'm scared he's gonna do something stupid…"

…_**Show me which way to go**_

_**Can't do this by myself**_

_**Cant do this oh no…**_

Karen looked truly concerned for the first time during their entire conversation. I guess, she hadn't fully realized how far Dan had pushed Deb, and Nathan away until then. She was gladder than ever that she had decided to keep the evil bastard away from her son. Though before either could say anything else Brooke's phone began to vibrate.

"I don't recognize this number, weird." She said, picking up the phone. "Hello…"

"Is this Brooke Davis?" Said the stern man's voice on the other line.

"Yea, this is she…"

Brooke looked up towards Karen, confused. She was met with an equally nervous look back.

"Listen, this is Sheriff Crawford, I've got Nathan and Lucas Scott here at the station. We picked them up for reckless driving. Both of them had been drinking, and I haven't been able to reach either of the parents at their homes. The arrogant one told me to call you. Since their father is the mayor I am willing to let this one slide if you can find a parent to pick them up…"

"Ummmmm, hold on one second." Brooke gasped at the information, cupping the phone with her hand and directing her attention to Karen. "That was Sheriff Crawford…Lucas and Nathan were arrested. He wants you to come bail them out?"

"What?" Karen shrieked, standing up and grabbing her purse off the counter. "Oh for Christ's sake you and Lucas always saving people getting in more trouble than it's worth." She scoffed. "Well let's go now…" She instructed impatiently.

"Okay, Ms. Roe and I will be there in ten minutes. Thank you so much." Brooke told the officer and hung up, chasing after Karen, who was already bolting angrily toward her car twenty feet ahead.

The ride to the station was painfully silent. Upon entering the police station they could see both young men sitting ashamed in the corner. Brooke immediately ran up to Nathan, as Karen did the same for Lucas.

"Are you alright?" They both spattered out in unison.

Neither one of the boys could say much of anything in response, and only nodded in return. Karen then left to resolve the situation with the officer. When she returned all three of them were silent. Karen drove Brooke and Nathan back to their car and made them promise to go right home. Then she and Lucas disappeared in her car.

As they made their way home Brooke pondered over the fact that she hadn't gotten the chance to ask Lucas why he had been acting so strange and distant. Aside from the obvious issue of alcohol consumption, and police involvement she couldn't imagine why he wouldn't have spoken to her. She decided the whole situation was too weird to even worry about, and didn't even attempt to question Nathan. As they returned to the house Brooke only stopped him briefly, before she went off to her room.

"We've got each other, remember that. Okay. Those were your words to me when I thought I wouldn't make it without Peyton. Now, I'm saying them back to you. I love you," She said to him calmly, stepping on her tiptoes to kiss him on his forehead.

"I know." He admitted. "Love you, too."

The two friends each walked separate paths back to their respective beds. They were both ready for a much-needed night of rest.

…

"_Dada, dada, dada…" Cried a little blond headed boy stuck all alone on a swing set._

_On the basketball court only a mere 10 feet away stood a group of teenagers playfully shooting around, paying no attention to the two year old's cries. However for one of the players, the child's pain pierced through, constantly, physically hurting him. Each time the young man would walk towards the child something would shock him back, but it wouldn't make the screams stop. It only made them worse._

"_Dada, dada, dada…"_

Lucas woke up in a cold sweat from tossing and turning all night. It was horrible. No matter how many times he woke up and forced himself back to sleep, reassuring himself, it was only a dream, the same scenario found its way back into his subconscious. It was driving him insane. Night after night, the same little boy crying out for his dad, for Lucas, to come to his side.

Lucas clearly couldn't explain this situation, his fears, to Brooke. She had already noticed something was up the night of the police station debacle, and it had started to take its toll on their relationship. He couldn't tell her the truth though, he didn't even know it. Plus, she would have totally freaked out if he came to her with this story. He was stuck. In all actuality he had no real reason, other than a gut feeling, and a reoccurring nightmare, to question Rachel's word that Parker wasn't his son. He just couldn't shake the feeling.

"Hey boo." Brooke greeted him at his bedroom door, letting herself in, and bouncing around.

"Hey…" He yawned out, trying to stretch himself more awake. "What are you doing here?"

"I always come here Saturday mornings?" She responded confused. "What's going on, Luke?"

"Trust me, you don't wanna know. Really, it's nothing." He lied.

…_**Dont know how I should bear**_

_**The cards that I been dealt**_

_**Can't do this…**_

"To hell it's nothing! How are you gonna say I don't wanna know and then say it's nothing! I'm really trying to keep my cool here, I really am, but ever since the other night all you've wanted to do is 'reflect' and seclude yourself from me. I'm just gonna say it…are you cheating on me? Because that's the only reason you wouldn't want to you know…"

Lucas half-laughed at her last statement. If she had only known his true reasons she would know that having sex was the last thing on his mind.

"No…" He started to object, before Brooke cut him off.

"I mean I know I've bee working a lot, and had a ton on my plate with Nathan, but you're really freaking me out here okay."

"Babe, I'm not cheating on you. I promise. I'm just dealing with some stuff."

"Okay, I can help you deal?"

"That's really sweet of you, but I'm sorry…this is something I have to figure out on my own."

…_**Is anybody listening**_

_**Can anybody answer my prayers? **_

_**Please say yes…**_

Brooke stood heartbroken, looking deep into his eyes. That wasn't the Lucas Scott she knew and loved standing before her. She didn't buy that load of crap he gave her for one minute, but who was she to accuse him. He had been nothing but perfect to her up until this point. There must be something serious bothering him, and it killed her that he wouldn't open up to her about it.

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"I just need some time…"

"Okay, I can give you time…how ever long you need." She assured him, sitting back in his computer chair, signaling she could wait for him there.

"Alone…"

"Oh, that kind of time." She replied sarcastically. "So, in other words, you are breaking up with me."

Lucas went silent, confirming his girlfriend's worst fears. He hadn't planned on breaking up with Brooke. He loved her with all his heart, but this whole thing with Parker and Rachel made him re-think things. It put him in a bad place, and until he got to the bottom of it, he probably shouldn't be anyone's boyfriend.

When she couldn't stand the silence anymore Brooke grabbed her purse, clenched between her arms to her chest, and walked out.

"Brooke, wait." He called after her.

_**...Does anybody feel the same**_

_**And is there anybody who cares**_

_**Life's unfair, it's so unfair**_

_**I want something more than this**_

_**I've given all I can give…**_

She couldn't look back. She knew she had to get away from him as quickly as possible, before the tears started flowing. Everything was unraveling in front of her very own eyes. It was as if she saw it coming but didn't.

…_**I just wanna feel I belong**_

_**I just need the strength to be strong…**_

_Is this really happening?_ She thought. _Was Victoria right? He was just using me for the moment? No…he just needs time, that's all. I have to keep telling myself that. This isn't about me, it isn't my fault, he just needs time._

…

Finally the unforgettable, incomparable Black Wednesday had arrived, once again. Aside form New Years Eve; tonight was the biggest night of the year for Tree Hill residents. The Hilton downtown was hosting their annual extravagant event, and this year the theme was masquerade ball.

On any other occasion that theme and this night would have been a spectacle Brooke couldn't have missed. She would have been looking forward to it with intensity. However after her and Lucas decided to take a break, things just became monotonous and dreary. So instead of risking a night of regret, she had agreed to close the café for Karen. That meant she would have to stay an extra couple hours cleaning up the place before leaving.

When the time had come to close up Brooke made her way towards the exits, and locked the doors. Outside she could see every costume mask imaginable on the faces of the people walking past her to the party. Instead of whining about not being able to go herself she turned back into the coffee shop and started to ascertain the situation. Karen had left her a list of things to do before she had left. Brooke hesitantly grabbed it off the counter and started working.

_Clean off counters, tables, and chairs_

_Restock the bathrooms_

_Change out the coffee filters_

_Wash the floors_

_Let down the safety blinds_

_Take inventory _

_Count down cash register_

_Re-package baked goods_

_Place petty cash and receipts in safe_

_Seriously?_ She thought. _I'm gonna be here for forever! I dunno how Karen does this every night._

Staying true to her promise Brooke busily tried to accomplish the list of tasks. Kneeling down with a sponge in her hand she started to wipe the floors down. Just when she thought she couldn't handle anymore a tall, dark, and handsome figure stepped into her view. Looking up at the man, who was fancy as ever in a tuxedo, she smiled brightly.

…_**Show me which way to go**_

_**Can't do this all alone**_

_**Don't feel like I know how **_

_**To make it on my own…**_

"What are you doing here?" She asked.

"Well, I thought Cinderella needed a fairy god mother to get her to the ball tonight…"

"Yea," She laughed. "I wish, but I've got this list of things to do before I close up. I can't do that to Karen, she's no evil step mother."

"Okay, well where are you on the list?"

"#4- Wash the floors. Hence the reason I'm on the floor right now…"

…_**Can anybody help...**_

"Okay, well…hold on one sec." He told her escaping to the stock closet and coming back with a long object. "Meet, Mr. Mop…I might not be the most skilled in housecleaning, but I have seen our maid use this thing here a time or two. Takes the pain out of it" He joked. "Here give me the list, we'll split it. You take evens, I got odds. We'll knock these out in no time."

Brooke was flabbergasted at his transformation; she couldn't even believe this was the same guy she knew. Luckily for her, Nathan's not even one night stint in the slammer seemed to have knocked him somewhat back to reality. This wasn't exactly reality for them; well at least in the past it hadn't been, but either way she was glad to have a friend there to help her out.

When they had finished up the list of tasks it dawned on Brooke that she didn't have a costume. Even more so she smelled of coffee beans and Lysol. Not really the kind of impression she wanted to make.

"Nate, I can't go…I stink and I don't have anything to wear!"

"Brooke, I know you better than anyone, and do you forget you practically live at my house? You had an outfit planned, hanging up in your closet. I brought it with me, it's in the car." He explained with a victorious smile.

"I'll still smell," she fired back.

"Look you smell fine to me, but if you want we can swing by Mc Donald's and get something there that way we both smell like cheeseburger and fries?"

She hit him, knowing that he was making fun of her, and began to pout.

"Relax, I'm kidding, I brought your perfume too."

"Oh, Yeah!" She shrieked, turning her frown upside down, hopping up and down in circles, and then jumping into his arms. "Masquerade ball here we come, follow me, your now fairy god mother…you're my Prince Charming!"

The handsome brunette duo locked the café up for the night, and made their way to the party.

…

Today marked the fifth day in a row that Lucas had not gotten a good nights sleep on account of his neurotic fixation with Parker being his son. Having realized that his fears would only get worse he had devised a plan to confront Rachel about it. Instead he had found himself running into her mother and Parker walking out of the Tree Hill clinic. Seizing the opportunity he made his way over to speak with her.

"Hey, Ms. Gatina!" He shouted, trying to grab her attention.

"Oh Hi, Lucas…I haven't seen you in forever. How are you doing?" She finally said back.

"I've been okay, how about you? And Parker? What were you doing here?"

"Oh we've been coming to see Dr. Collins for a couple of months now. He's a very kind man. Do you know him?"

"No," Lucas lied. In reality he had been seeing Dr. Collins for years.

"Oh, yea well that makes sense. He's a heart specialist. This little guy here has a weak one…a genetic disorder, HCM. Must have inherited it from his father."

"Yea," Lucas swallowed hard. "That's too bad. Well I better be off. It was nice seeing you."

"Always."

Lucas then watched as she and Parker walked to their car and drove off. For some reason today seemed to be sunnier than most, and it beat down on upon him in a manner which he couldn't escape. It felt over a hundred degrees to him, though it was actually probably only sixty-five at the most. Whatever it was, guilt, fear, he didn't know, but something in the air was thickening up around him.

_Parker has HCM?_ He thought. _The same genetic condition as I do? This can't be a coincidence. No way. _

Everything around him started to cave in. He could hardly stand to breathe anymore.

_Oh my god, Parker is my son. Why wouldn't Rachel have told me? Why would she have lied? I refuse to be like my own father. I need to be there for him…_

In the short time it had taken him to walk back to his house he had made up his mind. Nothing was certain yet, but he knew that he had to make the effort. It was his greatest fear that Rachel had questioned his loyalty and integrity as a man, as a father. He resolved to go to the masquerade ball, where he knew she would be, and approach her there. In his mind he had a lot of making up to do. He refused to be like Dan Scott.

…

Inside the Hilton had been transformed into a marvelous winter wonderland. Glistening crystal white trees blanked the backdrop, and silver and gold lined the floors. Tables were magnificent, with five-foot high centerpieces. The lighting was just the right mix of dim and brightness. Each and everyone look brilliantly disguised.

Brooke, true to form, wore a fabulous silk and chiffon, blood red dress. The top was strapless, with a sweetheart neckline, and formed around her toned chest perfectly. The bottom draped over her curves, and flowed into a train of fabric. Meticulously hand crafted by herself, small red and black feathers were placed in all the right spots creating drama and drawing attention. Her mask was coordinated to unite the whole ensemble together, lined with red sequins, emphasizing the large feather over her left eye. Pairing a seductive rep lip as a finishing touch, she entered the room looking more stunning than ever.

Being anonymous was easy for most people, but for Brooke Davis it was nearly impossible. Trying to fade into the crowd, she and Nathan stood beside a large group of people. As the night rolled on she had begun to fall more at ease. She had even found it in herself to have a little fun, even if she had been wishing Lucas by her side. As fate would have it, that wish came true. Unfortunately in this case he had only brushed by her.

Tempted by his unlikely character she removed herself from Nathan, with the convenient 'power room' excuse, and tailed his every move. When he eventually stopped he approached a tall auburn haired girl in a short green dress, who even masked, was unmistakable for Rachel Gatina.

Ugh, what the hell is he doing talking to that skank? She thought. I knew it, he's cheating. What a lying sack of bologna.

…_**Is anybody listening**_

_**Can you hear me**_

_**Show Me… **_

Creeping closer, so that she would be able to hear their conversation, she stepped behind a large white column. Even there she still couldn't make out exactly what they were saying.

"Yea-----he's------, I was scared, but I've always love you. I'm sorry." She could hear Rachel saying through tears.

"I promise, I'll ------- forever."

Too hurt to fully take the situation in to its full entirety Brooke dashed away in tears. What she turned back to see was something too awful, too painful to even bear. Mid-sentence Rachel had cut off Lucas, and lunged forward to rap him into a passionate kiss. Caught off guard, and in the moment he allowed for her to touch his lips with hers, and kissed back. What may have been as innocent on his part as wanting to do right by her, having confirmation now that she was indeed the mother of his child, ended up unknowingly stabbing Brooke's heart, and breaking it into a million pieces.

…

Brooke had been able to compose herself enough for Nathan to be unaware of her breaking heart, allowing her to relish in her sorrows alone that night. As she stood looking back her corkboard, which was full of photos she and Lucas had taken, she felt fooled. She felt stupid for believing his love was real, ashamed of how much she had cared and showed him of herself, and most of all hurt. In return for her undivided heart and soul, all he had done in the end was betray her, just like every other guy.

_You see, the way I see it,_ she thought. _L__ove is like falling down... in the end you're left hurt, scarred, and only with a lingering memory of it all to last forever.__ We are taught not care too much for fear that the other person won't care as much, or not at all, and we become afraid to love. Yet for a few minutes, he made me feel as though I actually meant something to someone, that it was okay to care so much because that's what you do when you are in love._

_I don't know which I would rather believe at this point... I don't know which will end up hurting me the least, that he never did care or that he eventually stopped. Maybe my mother was right. Maybe I did get my hopes up too high. Maybe I was in over my head. Maybe I am the stupid one for thinking that he loved me, but maybe, just maybe, I was tired of being alone. And the worst part of it all, the worst feeling in the world, is knowing you've been lied to._

_You know, no one can promise they'll never hurt you because at one time or another, it will happen, trust me. But, they can promise you honesty. In the end, the real test is if the time you spent together will be worth the pain in the end. In my opinion, sometimes it is better to be alone. No one can hurt you that way; no one can take away something they never had…_

******Lyrics used in this chapter were from Is Anybody Listening, by Danity Kane.******


	9. I'll Be Dreaming

**All Those Years Ago**

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**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Author's note: Thanks so much to those who have reviewed and continued following my story. Please continue! In other news, I graduated. Woohoo! Finally. Now I will be able to move forward with life!lol Anyways. I hope none of you abandoned this story during my hiatus. There is still plenty of drama and love awaiting these characters. Let me know what you think. Hugs.**

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**I'll Be Dreaming**

…_**So I've come to this final**_

_**Conclusion**_

_**I will not wait around**_

_**For you to break my heart again**_

_**Now I understand**_

_**What a fool I've been**_

_**I will forgive you, but**_

_**You know I can't forget**_

_**Because…**_

Basketball season at Tree Hill High had finally advanced into full swing. Over the past few months Nathan and Lucas Scott had been pulling away victory after victory, sealing an undefeated record, thus far. On the sidelines, head cheerleader, Brooke Davis, had been rooting them along, in flawless fashion, the entire way. Her squad had even secured a top seed at this year's national cheerleading competition, an accomplishment she had coveted since childhood.

From the outside these three appeared to be perfect, as their impeccable seasons portrayed. However, if you took a closer look at each of them you would notice a secret heartache hidden deep within their fragile hearts.

For Nathan, it was contempt. He still harbored ill feelings towards Haley for leaving and his father for pushing him to his breaking point. He had moved beyond the initial devastations, but he had not fully let go. What made it worse was that his heart still belonged to her, and every day she was missing from his life only made it worse. Ironically, basketball, something only weeks ago would have consumed him, had turned into his only solace. It was the one place where he and only he had control of his inner thoughts. Each night, each game, the court was his domain, his place of solitude. For two hours each day he could forget how much he missed Haley, how much he wished his father would get off his back. It was in that time alone that his pain would go away.

Lucas, on the other hand, had been busy fighting an internal battle of right and wrong. He wanted, rather felt he needed, to be the better man for Rachel and their son. He felt it was his obligation; one that, unlike his own father, he could not ignore. After accepting the fact, and welcoming the idea, he quickly embraced Parker into his life. Surprisingly, the transition into being a father had come easy and natural to him. What he hadn't expected being so difficult was keeping it a secret. He had obviously informed his mother and Keith immediately, but Rachel had insisted that no one else know, and that included Brooke. For Lucas that had been the worst part of all; not being able to explain himself, or the situation, to her. Instead he could only stand back and hope that someday she would understand and forgive him.

As for Brooke, she probably harvested the most pain of all. Her wounds were the freshest, and she didn't have any answers to heal them. The poor girl was caught between her unwavering love for Lucas, and the realization that he was no longer hers. She was experiencing her first true heartbreak. She was angry, sad, hurt…vindictive and confused, but most of all she felt foolish for having any of those feelings. She wanted the hole in her heart to go away. She wanted to be whole again. She wanted to forget how much she cared, but that was impossible.

So, as you can see, no matter how idyllic their situations seemed Nathan, Lucas and Brooke were far from perfect. Each one of them had been fighting individual demons. They were all silently working through feelings of abandonment and heartache. Today's game would be no exception to that rule.

By the fourth quarter it seemed fairly certain that the Ravens would take this game as another victory. As the roar of the crowd heightened Brooke placed her eyes on Lucas, who had just scored, then Rachel who was cheering to her right, and then to Lucas once more. This brought her soaring back into the inner depths of her heartache.

_I wonder… is it always like this? _She thought._ I mean, being in love…miserable, isn't it? It opens your chest…and your heart and it lets someone get inside you and mess you up! And inevitably they will…even the greatest guys. So, you build up all these defenses…you build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...ugh…and you fall in love! You can't fight it…you give them a piece of you that was before untouched. They don't ask for it…nope, one day they just do something idiotic like smile at you, or call you beautiful, and then that life you built, which you thought was safe, isn't your own anymore. Yep, love takes you hostage… it gets inside you. It makes you so damn vulnerable that a simple phrase like "maybe we should just be friends" or "I need some time" turns into a crushing force, like a splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts…not just in your imagination or mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. It eats you up and leaves you crying in the darkness…and it only gets worse…yea, I hate love…and that damn Lucas Scott! _

By the time Brooke had snapped out of her own thoughts the game was practically over. The Ravens had easily defeated their opponent. With the sound of the buzzer signaling the end of the game the once-so-cheery brunette dragged herself over to the bleachers. There she sat, dazed, waiting for Nathan to come out of the locker room.

…_**I'll be dreaming of**_

_**The nights when I would lie awake**_

_**And stare into**_

_**The light behind your eyes**_

_**I have run into**_

_**The trap you set before me, blind**_

_**And now my love**_

_**Cannot seem to hide…**_

Rachel Gatina, home wrecking, boyfriend stealing, whore of the year, as Brooke referred to her, stood only feet away. Looking at her she couldn't help but be reminded of Lucas. How he could just give up on her, on their love like he had, was beyond her. She hated Lucas, but even more so she blamed Rachel. In reality the hardest part about this whole messed up situation was that none of it made sense to her. Luke had seemed to be so in love, just as she had and still was. Then out of the blue one day it was as if it all just changed, in the blink of an eye. It pained her to even think about that day.

"Hey bitch!" Rachel taunted, with a cunning smirk on her face. "You know…you should just get over him already…drop that pathetic 'I need Lucas' thing you've been working lately. It isn't helping your image…trust me."

"Oh…trust you?" Brooke replied, half-laughing. "Yea, you're just the person I want to take advice from…slut! You make me look like an angel."

"Feisty, aren't ya? I guess I can't blame you…after all Lucas did leave your sorry ass for me, but that's all in the past now, right?"

"Listen, don't think for one second that I am jealous of you!" Brooke warned shoving her finger in Rachel's face.

Luckily Brooke noticed Nathan coming out of the locker room just then, out of the corner of her eye. With enough time to make her graceful exit she managed to get in a few last words, then smiled and turned to walk away.

"You are just another Angelina wannabe…see ya around, skank." Brooke spat.

Nathan moved to her side instantly, sensing the tension between the girls. He knew Brooke way to well. There was no way this would end well unless he got her out of there pronto, which he did. Once outside, the two walked toward his car in silence. His presence alone had calmed her down and allowed her to take a deep breath. She managed to get out a small smile and returned to her normal demeanor.

"There she is." He teased, noticing the transition. "I thought for a minute there you were gonna go werewolf on me."

"Ha, very funny, Edward." She mocked, rolling her eyes, knowing he would love the comparison, even if he hadn't read a single line of the Twilight series. "You know I wanted to beat her skull in just then…and I would have if…"

"Yea." He cut her off. "Don't worry, I know you're crazy…I've been to way to many parks with you and Bevin as kids to ignore the signs of a pending catfight, that's for sure.

"You're such an idiot…you know that…that was like one time and she was totally asking for it!"

"Riiiight!" He agreed, sarcastically, speeding off out of the parking lot.

…

The next day Brooke had to work at Karen's Café. Being that business was slow that evening, she decided to brainstorm ideas for her Winter Formal dress. The ensemble she envisioned would never be available at any department store, or even boutique. Instead, as usual, she would have to pull it all together from scratch. To her it was more gratifying that way. Plus, it was the only way she could guarantee that it was a one-of-a-kind.

Busy doodling away on her sketchpad Brooke had failed to notice that Karen had walked into the store. It wasn't uncommon for her to become lost in the world of fashion design, but these days it had become a regular event.

"So, what are all these?" Karen asked pointing to the drawings Brooke was working on.

"Oh, these?" She replied, embarrassed. "Nothing really…just some sketches I've been working on."

"May I see them?"

"Sure."

…_**And now I sit and talk**_

_**Through all, the confusion**_

_**I cannot now remember**_

_**Who the hell I am…**_

Karen admired her work carefully as Brooke watched on nervously. Included among the sketches were photographs Brooke had taken of the completed creations. Before that moment, no one, besides Peyton, had ever looked through them. In fact, even she had barely glanced over the pages until then.

"Brooke, these are amazing! Truly, you have a gift."

"Really? It's just something I do for fun… I've been doing it for, well…forever it seems. I guess it sorta helps me to take my mind off things, ya know?"

"Yea, I've had my share of heartaches so I know it isn't easy…how are you doing, by the way?"

"Eh, I'm hanging in there."

"Well, I'm glad to hear that. Listen, I know I might not be the most likely candidate, considering…but I'm here for you if you ever need someone to talk to."

"Thanks Karen. That means a lot."

"Okay, well then, I guess I better be going…this wedding isn't going to plan itself!" She sighed, giving Brooke a warm smile.

After waiting a moment to see if Brooke had anything more to say, Karen slid back the sketchbook, still open to the page of Peyton's junior prom dress. Out of any dress Brooke had ever made that one was by far her favorite. Starring at the page in front of her she recalled thinking that day how insanely gorgeous and happy her friend had looked. Angelic even, as ironic as that may seem now. She wished her friend could be here now, when she needed her so desperately, to give her advice.

"Wait Karen, can I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"You loved Dan, right, I mean in high school?" 

"Hmm…oddly, yes." 

"Okay, look. I know you probably can't answer this for me, but... what did you do when he didn't love you back? How did you get over it?"

"Well…I started my café…poured myself into my work… I found myself. That's the best advice I can offer you."

"And Keith? When did you know he was the one?"

"I guess that part I've always known. My mother once told me: 'people who are meant to be together, always find their way back in the end.' Dan gave me Lucas and for that I will never regret having loved him, but with Keith it's different…he completes me."

"Thanks Karen."

"Anytime…you know what, I was just thinking. How would you like to design my wedding dress?"

"Are you serious?" Brooke screeched. "Oh my god…I would love to."

"Okay good…well that is one less thing I have to worry about." She smiled and winked at Brooke before walking out.

"You are going to have the most fabulous gown ever…I promise!"

…

With the Winter Formal only days away Brooke Davis was in rare form. Unlike in other years, where the most important aspect would have been her subsequent crowning as Queen, this year was different. Karen's advice had really resonated with her. As a result, the three-time reigning homecoming queen had more important things to be considering this year. She had recently come to realize that her livelihood rested in her popularity, that she had not contributed anything substantial to the world.

…_**You're not the only one**_

_**Who created an illusion…**_

Before Lucas this actualization would have been trivial at most, and more than likely would have never amounted to anything worthy of mention. However, the time she had shared with Lucas changed her. It changed her outlook on life. She no longer wished to be seen as another pretty face. She wanted to be more than just the rich girl, especially considering for the time being she had been un-officially stripped of that title. Nonetheless, what she truly wanted was to be the girl Lucas had seen her as in Peyton's drawings, the one that was beautiful, brilliant and brave.

She knew, if there was anyone who could set her on the right path, it was Haley James she needed to talk to. Having come from a huge family of ladies, who were just like Brooke, Haley was one of a kind. Though she knew her friend would be busy, being several weeks into a cross country music tour by now, she called her anyway. After all that is what friends are for, right? If the situation were reversed Brooke would have been insulted if Haley had thought otherwise.

"Hello…Brooke?" Haley answered, the sounds of heavy guitar playing in the background.

"Haley James…I was starting to think you had forgotten about your old friend." Brooke teased.

"It's only been 6 weeks silly…plus, who forgets Brooke Davis?"

"True…and more true. So how is the fancy road trip lifestyle? Tell me you ditched that mouth breather, Keller, already."

"No," she laughed. "He's really not that bad once you get to know him…plus, he is the one who's affording this whole thing. Basically, I'm a nobody right now…but it is pretty amazing. We play in front of crowds, like I've never seen before…I love it, I love every night of it…but there isn't a moment when my heart isn't in Tree Hill… with you, with Lucas and…"

"With Nathan?"

"Yea. How is he?"

"You know, what do you expect. He was pretty torn up about it. I mean, I'd never seen him like that before Hales. Even with everything we went through with Peyton…it was scary. I guess he's doin better now, you know, with basketball and everything…but even though he'd never admit it I know he misses you."

"I miss him too…" she sighed, then attempting to change the subject. "But I know you didn't call to talk about me…so what's up?"

"Lucas and I broke up…"

"What? Why?"

"It doesn't matter…I've decided that I need to expand my horizons. You know be more of a philo-presist?"

"Philanthropist?"

"Whatever…so how do I do that?"

Haley couldn't help but laugh at her friend. Sometimes Brooke could be so random. You could never be too sure what she was gonna say or do. It was a nice gesture and a welcomed novel idea, that of Brooke Davis giving back the society she had bled dry for so many years. But, if she had gone this far to conjure up a plan like so, Haley was certain that her friend had gone mad.

"Brooke, are you sure about this? You know that means you will have to provide some sort of service or good with out getting paid in return, right?

"Well, duh…I don't want to be a hooker!"

"That isn't what I meant, but never mind…so what is your plan?"

"I was thinking, maybe I could design a line of clothing and I dunno give it to poor people…kids maybe? I love kids."

"What about this…you design the line and then we'll talk…my manager is calling me. Gotta let you go… I love the idea, though and I'm sorry about you and Luke. Oh, and I forgot to mention…our bus is stopping in Tree Hill for the weekend. See you in a couple days! Love ya, bye tigger!"

"What? Yeah! Okay…bye tour girl!"

Excited to be reunited with her friend Brooke jumped off the bed and immediately got back to working on her dress. She knew she only had half as much time now, because she would have to make something equally fabulous for Haley to wear. As she was putting together the final touches on her gown Nathan walked in.

"Hey Nate! Guess who I just talked to?"

"I dunno…who?"

"Haley."

"Oh."

"She's coming into town this weekend. Did you still want to go to the dance together? I don't mind if you'd rather take her…"

"I deleted Haley a long time ago."

"Yea, I'm not buying it for a minute, tough guy. She misses you, ya know?"

"I bet that won't keep her away from Keller."

"Nate. That was a long time ago. You are a different guy now, and Haley isn't Peyton. Don't punish her."

"Whatever…I came in here to see if you wanted to get something to eat…"

"Sure…can we go to Pita Palace?"

"McDonald's?"

"Gross…Taco Bell?"

"How are you gonna say McDonald's is gross and then suggest Taco Bell? That's the worst!" He joked.

"So, Taco Bell it is?" She grinned.

"Taco Bell it is…I'm driving."

….

The weekend of Winter Formal had finally arrived. Brooke could barely make it through her classes, anticipating Haley's return. After her last period she rushed back to her place, where Haley was to be waiting. Between now and the dance there was so much to be done. She assumed Haley would have royally freaked out and avoided her if she had told her the truth so she hadn't even mentioned the night's real plans yet. That plan was for both of them to go to the formal, and one way or another it would happen. She was sure of it.

_I hope she hasn't gotten fat from being on the road,_ she thought, on her way home. _Otherwise, that dress is not going to fit her!_

Finally making it back, Brooke burst through the door and bounded towards Haley, who was quietly sitting on her bed.

"Tour girl!" She squealed, nearly body slamming her into the mattress.

"Tigger…" Haley responded less enthusiastically. "You are really going to have to stop calling me that. It sounds ridiculous."

"Well, you are no longer my tutor girl…so what do you want me to call you?"

"Try…Haley?"

"Oh that's boring." She insisted, changing the subject immediately. "So listen, I know you're gonna freak, but I made you a dress…"

"What for?" Haley asked, concerned.

"You're going to the Winter Formal with Nathan and I…"

Brooke then disappeared into her closet and came out with the dress. It was incredible. It looked like something Grace Kelly would have worn in her day. Even Haley, who had absolutely no fashion sense, couldn't deny its beauty. The entire bodice was beaded with tiny crystals and pearls, and the color was such a radiant shade of white that it looked nearly translucent in the light. It had flowing tulle cap sleeves, which lead to a full open back and the fabric draped over in layers creating the illusion of a train.

"What the hell Brooke! Am I getting married tonight? To the King of England? This is amazing! You should be wearing this…"

"Never…that dress was made for you. Don't worry, I didn't forget about me. Hold on a second" She affirmed, slipping back into the closet and coming out with the dress she had made for herself.

Equally, if not more magnificent was the gown she now held in her hand. The thing literally looked as though she had robbed the tomb of King Tut to make it. The strapless dress was form fitting, as usual, and made of millions of tiny gold, fish scales. It gathered at the center of her chest, with a sweetheart neckline, and descended into a luxurious mermaid like pseudo-train. In the light it sparkled like pure gold.

"Wow. Brooke. I don't know what to say. You are unbelievable!"

"So then you'll go with us?"

"Do I really have a choice?"

"Nope, not really."

"That's what I thought."

The two girls laughed in unison. Both knew that in matters like these Haley was no match for Brooke. If she had even tried to insist otherwise the monster in Brooke would have easily defeated her. Therefore it had been settled with no arguments. Just the way the cheery brunette had planned.

Just as the Brooke was finishing the final touches on her hair Nathan walked into the room. From the look on his face it appeared he must have forgotten about Haley's visit. He seemed as though he was looking straight at a ghost.

"Whoa, Nate…hello, you in there?" Brooke finally asked, waving her hand in front of his face, after watching him stand motionless for over a minute.

Snapping back out of his momentary shock he moved forward into the middle of the room.

"Sorry, you two took my breath away." He teased, though in reality Haley really had. "You know we're gonna be late if we don't leave now."

"Only fashionably late…" Brooke corrected. "Just kidding, we're ready…don't get your panties in a bunch Scott."

Brooke smacked Nathan on the ass, grabbed Haley by the hand, and skipped off towards their car. Nathan and Haley both just went along, rolling their eyes at her childish antics.

During the ride none of them wanted to open the can of worms that was festering. Instead, to relieve the awkward silence, they decided to use radio-therapy. Unfortunately, for Nathan, every song seemed to remind him of Haley's absence. When they reached the dance the bubbly brunette swiftly exited, purposely leaving the other two behind to work things out.

"So, what are you doing back here anyways? Tour didn't come to Tree Hill did it?" He scoffed.

"No. We're off…I convinced them to stay here for the weekend." She explained as they sat in his car.

"Well, you're hair looks nice…"

"Thanks."

"You wore it that way when you came to my beach house."

"You remember how I wore my hair that night? I don't even remember…"

"Of course. And I remember that ugly-ass poncho thing you always wore too."

"Oh, my God, yes…I'm pretty sure you've made your feelings for that particular article of clothing very clear."

"Seriously though…I remember more than you think."

"Listen, Nathan… the night that I left, when I walked away from you and us for the tour I was being childish. I was upset and confused… and I was being stubborn. I fought back for all the wrong reasons. I can't take that back. I wish that I could…"

"Well, you don't have to worry anymore. I went through your family album when you were gone… I haven't slept with any of your other sisters."

"Oh great…and here I'm still trying to forget the fact that you slept with one of them."

"So, shall we?" He finally asked opening up the door for her.

Haley nodded and took his hand. Even though it had only been a couple weeks it had felt like forever. At the very minute their hands touched her heart began to flutter. It seemed as though all was forgiven between them. If she didn't know any better she would have thought she was falling in love with him for the first time. It still felt the same. She loved being at his side. It made her feel safe. Knowing that she would have to leave him all over again come tomorrow, it killed her. So she vowed to savor each and every moment they would share that night.

Inside the gym Nathan found Brooke standing by the refreshment table. Haley immediately focused her attention onto Lucas, who was sitting alone in the opposite corner.

"Hey, I'll be right back okay?" Haley told him. "I'll meet you back over by Brooke."

With that she quickly darted over to where her lifelong best friend had been sitting. They had briefly talked on the phone this morning, so her being there was no surprise to him. They had known each other for so long that this reunion shouldn't have been out of the ordinary. As kids whole summers would go by, while they were both at separate camps, not able to see each other, and at no time did they ever skip a beat in their friendship. Yet, today, as she approached him, she couldn't help but feel a difference in him. He wasn't the same Lucas she remembered. His eyes had changed…they were sad.

"Are you okay?" She asked him concerned, as she took the seat next to him.

"Yea…everything's fine." He replied without emotion, hugging her out of habit. "It's great to see you Hales. A lot has changed around here since you left."

"You're telling me…Rachel Gatina, Luke? What's going on?"

"Who am I talking to, Haley James, my best friend…or Haley James the rock star?"

"They are the same person Luke and you know that. We've always been able to tell each other everything."

"You wouldn't understand."

"You're right I don't understand, but that isn't because I don't want to. It's because you won't give me the chance."

"It's complicated…"

"I'm not buying it."

"Fine. But I swear if you say anything, to Nathan, and especially to Brooke…"

"You have my word, scouts honor."

"Okay…here it goes. I'm a dad…Rachel has a son, Parker. He's mine."

"What? She just shows back up and claims that you are the father of her child? That's a little fishy…don't you think?"

"Normally yea, but he's got HCM…"

"Oh my god…you're serious." She gasped, finally registering the significance of it all. "Wow. So you're really not gonna tell Brooke? She'd understand, I know she would."

"Rachel doesn't want anyone to know yet. Something about wanting to introduce Parker to me slowly and I respect that. Plus I'm gonna be a part of this kids life forever now. I promised Rach we'd try to work things out, for his sake…so what's the point? It's best that I just ride it out and let her hate me."

"Lucas, that's the stupidest thing you've said in a while…you are just so damn dramatic sometimes! We don't choose who we love, you know that…it just happens. I know you better than anyone… and you, my friend, are unhappy."

Lucas then turned his head down and sighed, ashamed. He knew she was right, but the damage was done, as far as he was concerned.

"Listen Hales, I always said, when the day came, I would be there for my son…no matter what it cost. I swore to myself I wouldn't be like Dan!"

"Luke, I support you wanting to be there for Parker 100%, but if you choose to stay with Rachel just because she is the mother of your child, not because you love her, than you aren't just hurting yourself…you're hurting everyone. You say you don't want to be like Dan…I get that…but, don't you see, that's exactly where you're headed. Look at him now…look at he and Nathan's relationship…look at he and Deb…they are miserable. You are nothing like Dan…so don't let that fear cripple you into making the biggest mistake of your life."

"When did life get so complicated?" Lucas wondered aloud, laughing along side his friend.

At that the two friends shared a quick embrace, only to be interrupted by a loud crashing sound from across the room, seconds later. There, in the distance, two dark shadows could be seen wrestling around on the ground. It appeared that in the struggle one had flung the other into the refreshment table, but before they could see much more, everyone had crowded around, shielding their view of what was going on. By the time they had managed to sift through the masses and reach the middle Nathan and Mouth had already succeeded in breaking up the fight. That didn't however stop the verbal assaults given by the two enraged young ladies.

"You ruined my dress you whore!" Brooke growled, dangling the torn half of her dress out for everyone to see.

"Please, that raggedy thing?" Rachel countered. "It's not wonder Lucas left you…"

"Oh no you didn't just go there!"

Before the ensuing brawl could heat up again Nathan pulled Brooke aside. Too upset and hurt to be rational. She instead excused herself, with as much dignity as possible, swung open the door to the exit with all her might, and sped off into the hallway and out of sight.

Back inside the gym everyone had now dispersed, leaving Lucas and Rachel standing alone. Speechless, he could only look at her with disappointed, angry eyes.

"What?" The feisty redhead finally asked innocently.

"Unbelievable…you are unbelievable. I'm outta here."

"But wait…Luke!" She shouted after him with no success. "Where are you going?"

"It's none of your business…don't worry about it Rach…."

"Of course it's my business…I'm your girlfriend!"

"You are NOT my girlfriend Rachel...I said we would try."

"Well, this doesn't look like you're trying very hard now does it?"

"You know what, just forget it…okay! You just don't get it...you never have." He explained walking off.

"Whatever?"

Upset and defeated Rachel returned to the party. As far as she was concerned, after that little outburst, Lucas could fend for himself. If he wanted to be alone, fine. That was what he was going to get. She on the other hand never wasted a chance to get down and dance. Especially since her mother had volunteered to take care of Parker for the night. Yep, the night had only begun for her.

…

It had been a while since Brooke had visited their spot. Once the school year had gotten under way, and the weather had turned colder, she had sort of neglected coming. It wasn't intentional. It just happened. Tonight though, she needed to feel close to Peyton again, and for a December night in Tree Hill it actually wasn't too bad outside. It was brisk when the wind blew, but other than that it was quite nice. The cool air was just what she had needed.

…_**I knew I'd find**_

_**My place, in time…**_

Taking her usual seat on the park bench, Brooke curled her knees up into her chest, to keep warm, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath in.

_When did it get so complicated, Peyt?_ She thought. _When did I become such a fool?_

At the sound of leaves rustling near her, Brooke opened up her eyes. To her amazement Lucas was slowly approaching. With his hands in his pockets, disheveled and jacketless, he stood in front of her.

"Is this bench taken?" He asked, awkwardly.

"Not unless you count Peyton…"

"Well, if I'm not interrupting." He teased, groaning slightly as he took his seat. "Don't worry; I'm not gonna ask you if you're okay."

"Thanks." She remarked, rolling her eyes.

"Know any good jokes?"

"You're looking at one."

Lucas's poor attempt at lifting the mood only backfired, with Brooke laughing miserably in response.

"Why does everybody lie? You know, the bad guys lie to get in your bed… and the good guys… lie to get in your heart." She continued, intentionally directing the last bit at him. "And, the worst part is, I'm the idiot that falls for it every time!"

"Hey… Brooke, you are not an idiot. Not even close. You know who you are. Most people don't, you know." He told her softly, pausing to gage her response. "I mean, that's why they lie. They're just afraid people might find out who they are before they figure it out themselves."

Acknowledging that he is, in fact, one of those who haven't figured it out, he nodded. Appreciative of his kind words Brooke looked at him with a thoughtful smile. The two then sat in silence for several moments. Noticing that she was getting cold, he finally turned toward her.

"Come on, let me take you home." He insisted.

"I can get home without a guy, thank you very much." She defended.

"Okay." He told her as he stood up, starting to leave.

"Wait…I really don't want to walk."

Turning back he smiled and held out his hand to her. Looking at it for a minute, stunned, she eventually accepted the gesture, quickly grabbed her purse, and let him help her up. Relieved that she no longer had to walk home she followed his lead.

…

As Haley boarded the tour bus the next morning she looked up at the sunrise thinking about the decision she was about to make…the choice that Lucas would have to make…the fears that they would all soon face.

_Eleanor Roosevelt once wrote: "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.  "_

_I believe that. I have to. Otherwise, my leaving is in vain and I will be giving up everything that matters most to me. _

_You see, Marianne Williamson always says that: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us...   playing small does not serve the world.  There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.  We are all meant to shine, as children do.  We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.  It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.   As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.  "_

_It won't be easy either… that I know, but we all have to find ourselves before we can fully give ourselves away…before we can give our hearts away._

* * *

_  
_

_*****Lyrics used in this Chapter were from "I'll Be Dreaming," by The Pierces*****_


	10. Weekend Apologies

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.**

**A/N: This chapter has no direct BL contact, but I am planting the seeds everywhere, so need not worry! There are mentions of them throughout. Toward the end it gets pretty intense, but it also I think answers some questions that many of you have been worried about, i.e. Rachel. **

**Also, a special thanks to everyone who has continued to read and review this story, especially LongLiveBrucas & Mickei, who have been with me the whole way. It's that support which keeps me writing! I'm hoping this chapter will be received well, and prompt more reviews, since I'm starting to fear some of ya'll are losing interest. These next few chapters are major build up for Brucas, so don't worry if you miss their interaction, it is coming soon, I promise...I just want it to be perfect! So, please give me your input. Hugs!**

* * *

**Weekend Apologies**

_**...I don't wanna know what they said,**_

_**About what you did,**_

_**Last night on the town and you had**_

_**A little too much to drink…**_

Nathan and Brooke were both cursed with having parents who just really didn't care. The holiday season had always seemed to make that fact all the more apparent. By now, neither of them expected much, if anything, in terms of parental affection, especially this time of year.

So, as you can imagine, Christmas time in their homes was far from warm and fuzzy. As a child Brooke would wake up every Christmas morning, run to her parent's room and leave devastated when neither would be there. It never changed. She always found the house empty except for one huge stack of perfectly wrapped presents, left by her parents, an intended suffice for their habitual absence. Year after year Brooke would sit under the tree, waiting patiently for hours on end, hoping and wishing, by miracle, someone would come home to see her open them up. Of course that never happened. So, this year instead of reliving another disappointing holiday, with the likes of Victoria and Richard, she decided to stay in Tree Hill.

Now, Nathan's family, they were a different story. For him, Christmas time meant that he would have to endure a long and painful week of having extended family in town. As far as he was concerned it was just another excuse for his lovely parents, the infamous Mr. and Mrs. Dan Scott, to embarrass themselves. Tensions were never at bay when those two hung around each other. The added ammunition of sibling rivalry only added fuel to the fire. By New Years Eve his house would feel like World War II had erupted. It never failed. At this point he couldn't imagine anything worse than being witness to that type of craziness. With Brooke staying there too, he knew things were about to get really interesting.

"Ding, Dong!" Nathan heard the doorbell ring, officially signaling the unfortunate arrival of this year's madness.

_Who in their right mind would come this early?_ He wondered to himself, and then it all made sense.

"Cooper!" He could hear his mother call downstairs, welcoming her youngest brother into the house.

"Hey there big sis, how's the kid?" He replied, referring to Nathan.

"Go see for yourself, he's been moping all day, in his room. You still know where it's at right?"

"Of course I do."

…

It was moments like that, which made Nathan contemplate running away to be with Haley in New York City. It was times like these when he wanted more than anything to forget that Haley ever chose the tour over him. Yet, no matter how badly Nathan may have wanted to run or hide, forget or ignore, trying to do so right then would have been useless. By then his Uncle Cooper was standing in the doorway of his bedroom.

"How you doing, Uncle Coop?"

"I hear better than you, you little bitch!" He teased, making his way over to the couch where Nathan sat. "By the way, I should beat your ass for looking like this, you handsome bastard! I mean, here I was starting to feel good about myself… I'm a race car driver, making a couple bucks, had a smoking hot lady, who I almost married by the way… and now I gotta compete with this?!"

"Dude, stop it."

"I'm serious, what's wrong with her? What, d'ya fall for a blind girl? Cuz hey, if you did… that's cool, I can dig it, you just gotta let me know what I'm workin with."

"She's not…" Nathan assured him, passing over a picture of Haley to prove it.

"Okay, so she's not blind…my bad…then what is it?" Pausing for a minute to look Nathan over. "Oh man, it's your gear, isn't it?"

"Huh?"

"Ok, drop your shorts, let's have a look." Cooper proclaimed, pretending to be obligated by this realization enough to examine his nephew's package for inadequacies.

"Man, you better quit playin with me." Nathan warned, as he slid over to the spot farthest from his uncle.

They both laughed. In the meantime Brooke had bounced in unannounced, hearing the latter part of their conversation and plopped down in between them.

"Hot Uncle Cooper!" She cried. "What a nice surprise…And, just in case you were wondering, I'm fairly certain he's well equipped down there." She added with a smirk, winking at Nathan.

"Oh, well then." Cooper acknowledged, looking back and forth between the friends, unsuccessfully trying to gage she and Nathan's relationship. "Moving along…hey, let me see that picture of your girl again."

After studying the photograph for a while the connection finally hit him.

"I knew I had seen this girl before!" Coop explained, gallantly. "Look…"

He then pulled out his I-phone and displayed the youtube video, where he had seen Haley before, for all of them watch.

_(MTV interview with Chris Keller & Haley James)_

"_Alright, I'm Zac Efron with Totally Live Requests. We're here today with new comers Chris Keller and Haley James, who's single, When the Stars Go Blue drops next Tuesday." The host explained, turning his attention from the audience to Haley and Chris, in the process interrupting the singers' playful laughter. "So I know you two are fresh off the tour…so, how are you guys hanging in there?" _

"_Uh…" Haley started, nervously, looking toward Chris for encouragement._

"_We're doing marvelously," Chris explained arrogantly, grabbing Haley's hand in an obvious gesture to the camera. "What more could a guy ask for?" _

"_Oh, right." The announcer nodded, moving the questions along. "So, it's clear you guys have great chemistry; obviously a great sound, now tell the truth, you a couple in real life?"_

_Haley and Chris laugh._

"_Well, actually…" Haley began to refute._

"_You know, the music never lies…" Chris interrupted with a huge grin, talking over a stunned and awkward Haley. He then puts his arm around her and squeezes tightly to emphasize their bond._

"_Say no more, folks! You heard it here first…"_

Irritated by the antics of Chris and feeling betrayed by Haley, Nathan immediately demanded that Cooper shut off the video. He then grabbed his keys and stormed out of the house, leaving Brooke and Cooper to sit alone in shock.

….

On the other side of town Lucas had decided he needed to stop by Keith's shop. Since the news of Parker's paternity had surfaced, there hadn't been much time for male bonding between he and Keith. In the past, whenever Lucas had needed advice, Keith had always been there.

Biologically, Keith Scott was not Lucas's father. But, if you ever saw them together, you would have never guessed otherwise. With Dan out of the picture, growing up, Keith had really been the only father figure Lucas knew. For that they loved each other like father and son. And though Keith had never been known to be a man of many words, the opposite of Lucas, he still managed to know all the right things to say. That was why this day Lucas called up on him.

…_**And, I promised myself that I**_

_**Wouldn't catch you if I could,**_

_**And leave it all on a grey ending,**_

_**New beginning, and I hope it goes away…**_

"Lucas?" Keith said, as soon as he saw his brooding nephew. "What brings you by the old shop?"

"Eh, I was driving by…thought I might catch ya." Lucas explained. "Need a hand?"

"Sure." Keith threw a wrench at Lucas and they began to work.

"Can I ask you a question, Keith?"

"When have I ever denied you that privilege?"

"True." He laughed.

"So shoot, what's up?"

"It's this hole thing with Parker…and Rachel… and Brooke. I've just been trying to be so strong, trying to be too strong for everyone…and it's killing me. When Rachel gave me the news I was crushed, yea, but I knew what I had to do. And, I promised myself that I wouldn't put that burden on Brooke …that I wouldn't drag her down with me, you know…I thought that she deserved that."

Keith put his tools down and walked over to his nephew, placing a supportive hand on his shoulder.

"Do you love her, Luke?"

"Yea, I do. I mean, the truth is I care about Rachel, a lot…but I love Brooke, I wanna be with Brooke, not Rachel."

"Well I think you just found your answer then kid…I'm getting pretty good at this, aren't I?" Keith smiled broadly at the thought.

"Yea. You are."

"Listen, it's a special thing, saying 'I love you' to the people you love. Because you never know when you'll lose them, or when they'll lose you. The only thing Brooke deserves from you it is the truth…remember that."

"Thanks, Keith!"

…

According to Brooke, the one redeemable thing about the winter holiday season was the Annual Boy Toy Auction. I was the one time a year that the stakes were set right.

Normally finding the money for tonight's bidding would have been simple…it's a five-letter word, D-A-D-D-Y. However, this year, with her parents off in California, she had to do something unfathomable… save money. From working at the café, over the past month, she had set aside a considerable amount of cash. Her theory: the more money the boy costs, the more money they're worth. However, given Nathan's current situation Brooke felt inclined to squash her original strategy, and instead plan a night especially for the two of them. She knew he was hurting…and so was she.

…_**She closes her eyes, and says,**_

_**"One more drink to ease the pain,**_

_**Just to get it off my mind.**_

_**And, I apologize before I drink tonight,**_

_**Before I drink tonight."…**_

_Is there a better way to ease the pain of love lost than to drink your sorrows away in the company of a friend?_ She thought. _I think not…_

"Come on, let's get those bids up, it's the Annual Boy Toy Auction. All right I've got $25, do I hear $40?" Brooke heard the familiar sounds of Coach Whitey Durham, as she entered the bar. "Oh come on people, this is for charity!" he announced, from the stage.

"$40!" Said some random blond in the corner.

"$40. Coming up, right there. Anybody got $50? How about $50?"

"$50!" Yelled another girl.

"$50. And remember for the next five hours, till midnight tonight, these boys are at your beck and call. How about $55?"

"$55!"

"$55, it is. Going once. Going twice. Sold for $55. Pay your money and get your boy."

Making her way into the corner, where Bevin sat with the rest of the cheerleaders, Brooke realized how foreign this world had become to her. She couldn't remember the last time she had gone out with Bevin, or Theresa, or any of the girls on the squad for that matter. These girls had, at one point, been all that she knew of life. It's amazing what a year can do…and how much can really change in the course of that time.

Before she could reminisce any longer the howls and screams of the crowd got her attention. It signaled to Brooke that soon she would have to join in on the fun.

_Whoever was being auctioned off at that point must have been important, who it could be? _She wondered. _Well they're at least hot…to get that much attention. _

"Can we get our first bid? I hear $70, right over there." Whitey called, pointing to the bidder.

"Damn." Bevin said, nudging Brooke.

"What?" Brooke asked, confused.

"$50. Going, going."

"Aren't you gonna bid on Lucas…he is your broody to your cheery."

"$75." Said a voice in the background.

_Damn why did Bevin have to know me so well sometimes!_ Brooke thought. _She barely knows her head from her ass! I'm surprised Luke's doing this…well; then again it is for charity._

"$75. Do I here any higher?"

"I'm holding out for Nathan…Lucas and I are just friends." Brooke lied. "Who the hell is bidding on him? Bevin…bid on him, okay bid it."

"What?"

"You have to bid it, I want you to buy Lucas."

"Why?"

"To keep him away from them. …bet it all!" She instructed her friend, throwing up her hand, just in case.

"Uh…$84.53?" Bevin screeched out.

"Going once."

"$100." Said the mysterious female voice in the back.

"$100. Going once."

"Who is that bidding on Lucas? I'm sorry Brooke I don't have anything else."

"That's okay. Thanks for trying."

"Going twice. Sold to the woman in the back for $100 American. The highest man of the night, Good job Lucas!

With that the redhead emerged from behind the group of girls exposing her identity; being, of course, none other than Rachel.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Brooke fumed. "That little slut, skank, ughhhhh…whore." She groveled under her breath, stomping her foot on the ground.

"I thought you and Lucas were just _friends_?" Bevin reminded her.

"We are. Yea, you're right."

_I guess I'll have to keep telling myself that!_ She thought. _No sense in getting hysterical over a boy, right? _

"Alright, we're down to our last boy toy, so loosen up those purse strings, pucker up those lips and remember, this is for a good cause." Whitey was back at it. "You're on, Nathan."

"$200!" Brooke screamed out, fighting the desperate roars of the other ladies.

It wasn't like her to mess around with money. Besides, why should she make the poor girls suffer, thinking that they might have had a chance with Nathan? That would just be cruel. So, with the clearest margin of victory, sealed in her honor, the cheery brunette paid her dues and went to collect her man.

…

To most people in Tree Hill Rachel Gatina may have seemed tough, harsh, and even cruel at times. Though behind that persona, there was a story, that nobody, not even Lucas, knew. It was one that had changed her life forever and made her into the "bitch" she was known as today. That story was the uncensored and unabridged, "Tale of She & Cooper Lee."

…_**It was about a year ago,**_

_**This time when things were lookin' good,**_

_**Got caught in the moment, and I didn't **_

_**Look too far ahead…**_

However, to fully sympathize, or at least try to understand the motivations behind the elusive Ms. Gatina, one would have to venture back even farther into her history. For there one might unravel the mystery she was unwilling to share; the answer, guarded beneath secrecy and years of deeply rooted pain.

Much of the agony, which led to that awful transformation, was due to the twisted relationship between she and her mother, Regina. While never a perfect one, the true turning point in Rachel's life had been her father's death, which occurred when she was only nine years old. Afterwards, her mother hastily remarried the first man who offered up his American Express card, Luther Crane, a recent widow himself. The man, who quickly became her stepfather, had two teenage daughters of his own: twin girls Amelia and Isabella. Being the workaholic he claimed to be, and more than likely a cheating whore, Luther was never around. Therefore, the responsibility of caring for and raising their three daughters had rested solely in the incapable hands of Regina.

In what almost sounds like the makings of a backwards Cinderella-ish scenario, Rachel, by default, became the "ugly duckling". So, as you may have guessed, the vivacious sex-bomb hadn't always been the way she is viewed today. That's not to say, by any means, she was ever ugly. In actuality, up until the end of her sophomore year, she had been fairly average in appearance. However, looking "ordinary," to the standards in which you or I might consider attractive, had been forever engrained in her mind as being unacceptable.

Having been blessed with such stellar role models, much like those of Brooke, she had learned the hard way that it was excellence and more importantly outer beauty, not inner beauty, which earned the most attention and praise. While constantly compared to the likes of Amelia, who could have passed for Giselle Bucheon's body double, and Isabella, who resembled Keira Knightly to a tee, Rachel grew to despise the way she looked. So, after being tormented by her mediocrity for years she, the once so proud "daddy's little girl", underwent extreme plastic surgery in the summer before going into her junior year.

The "Rachel" that emerged, the "new and improved" version, quickly captured notoriety within her family. For the first time since her father's passing, Regina seemed to take an interest in her daughter's life. At that, her mother wasted no time. She had taken it upon herself to contact modeling agencies, finally pawning her daughter off to the highest bidder.

Eventually, the mother-daughter team left Luther, forging a new destiny. Being a model had been incredible. Rachel traveled the world, taking part in exotic photo shoots, becoming more and more vain as the months prevailed. When the summer ended the Gatina ladies made a home for themselves in Tree Hill. It was at about this point in time that the buxom beauty was first introduced and began to date both Lucas Scott and Cooper Lee.

The former, being Mr. Scott, was the same good-hearted young gentleman we know him as today. The latter, being Mr. Lee, was, and still is, far from admirable. In part, to each of these men's defense, Rachel had never been completely honest with either of them. To Cooper, Rachel had pretended to be much more mature than she really had been. Her travels and augmented appearance had allowed her to easily fake the wisdom and looks of a 26-year-old. She instantly fell for the charming racecar driver's good looks and bad boy independence. Not to mention the fact that he was quite satisfying in the sack.

Whichever way it happened, the relationship between she and Cooper quickly took off into something more emotionally demanding than either could fulfill. He routinely left town and pursued other women, though he always came back to her, and she always let him back in. He was never devoted to her in the way that she had wanted, and deep down it hurt her more than she knew. Inevitably, when things with Cooper got rough, she turned to Lucas. In many ways he became her crutch. The funny thing was she never loved Lucas the way she loved Cooper. In the end she learned to love the way that Lucas treated her and looked at her, but she often confused that with true love.

…_**But, it**__**'**__**s not unusual for someone,**_

_**Like yourself to cross the line.**_

_**And I crossed so much fucked up shit.**_

_**Turned around and took what you had known…**_

When Rachel found out that she was pregnant her whole world flipped upside down. Even though, admittedly so, she could have been a lot safer, she was still very much a naïve young woman at the time. She had knowingly been playing a risky game of deception and lies, yes. She had been treating herself to a life of foolish and destructive behaviors, essentially living as two separate identities. Maintaining them both had become too difficult and she wanted out.

Rachel knew the baby was undoubtedly Cooper's. She was way too far along for it to have been Lucas's. In her mind it presented the perfect scenario, the cliché happily ever after. And, at first Cooper had been responsive to the news. He settled down a bit, started planning for the future, even proposed to her. Rachel thought she was about to get everything she wanted. So, when she finally mustered up the courage to confess her true age, something she knew she couldn't have hid any longer, she fell apart when he no longer wanted her in that way. To test him, or rather punish him, Rachel swore that she had had a miscarriage. Given that chance to escape Cooper capitalized on it and left town for good, leaving Rachel heartbroken and still very pregnant.

When it all came down to it, she had always known that she by far lacked the capacity needed to carry and raise the child on her own, without help. So, at her mother's advice, or condition, they relocated for the remainder of her pregnancy, in order to keep the baby a secret. This way, they both felt, she would have time to sort these matters out. Though, to be honest, from the beginning, it had been Regina's intention that Rachel would give the child up for adoption. After all, the world of modeling had been affording their extravagant lifestyle, something she was not keen on giving up, and she knew bringing a child into that equation would ruin everything.

Unfortunately for Regina, when the day came, Rachel decided otherwise. Blame it on Darwin, with that damn idea of evolution, but that precious little baby boy looked like a spitting image of Cooper. Well, okay, he didn't really look that much like him, he was all of a day old, but to her that image meant the world. She loved her son instantly, as she always had his father. So she named him Parker Lee Gatina, a tribute to her late father. The following fall she enrolled at Tree Hill High, and the rest of the story we know all too well. More lies, more secrets.

…_**Was about a month ago,**_

_**It got a little out of hand,**_

_**And, I saw it was coming this time,**_

_**But I was tangled up in place…**_

It had never been her intention to lie to Lucas or make him believe that Parker was his. It all sort of happened at once. He had been so sure that Parker was his and for a split second he made her believe it could be true. When she realized what had actually been done it seemed too late to take it back. To make matters worse, it would have been impossible to convince herself that Lucas wouldn't be a great dad. From the moment he held Parker that fact was clear. What hadn't come as easily, as she had hoped, was his affection for her.

Yes, he did not love her in that way anymore, it was clear the end was near for them, she could feel it…it terrified her. Feeling trapped, not knowing what else to do, Rachel made sure that Lucas would have to spend at least one last night with her, as her "boy toy".

"There's my stud!" Rachel called, as Lucas walked toward her unenthusiastically.

After quickly offering up the money she owed, it was made official…she owned him for the night.

"You ready?"

"Uh, actually Rach, can you hold on a minute? If you don't mind…I really need to say something to Brooke."

"Doesn't she have a date with her own "boy toy" to tend to? She just bought that hottie half-brother of yours, ya know?"

"Really?" He sighed, as she nodded.

"Whatdya say we hang out at the Rivercourt, instead, like old times?" She smiled, trying to cheer him up.

"Yea. Sure…let's get some beers first."

"Now you're talking."

And then she drove off.

…

Trying her hardest to mask the pain of having just watched Lucas drive off with Rachel, Brooke smiled brightly for Nathan. Since he was still clearly in denial over the Haley business she wanted everything to be perfect.

"I've always known you had a thing for me Davis, but $200?" He boasted; seeming more like the old Nathan Scott that usual.

"Oh you're such an ass! Can't friends just wanna spend some quality time together? We haven't had Brooke and Nathan time in forever…" She pouted.

"Yea, you're right…I was only kidding anyway. So what's the plan? I know you…you've probably got it scheduled right down to the minute." He said, searching her eyes for validation of his statement. "Am I right?" He smiled, cockily.

"You got me." She mocked, throwing her hands up in the air acting as though he should arrest her, guilty as charged.

"You better watch out…I might not play good cop." He warned, right before swinging her body over his shoulder into a "fireman's carry", then running to his car, ignoring her pleas to be let down.

"Ah! Nathan!" She screamed, kicking and punching him the best she could. "Let me down you baboon! You know, I own you tonight…not the other way around, mister." She added in her most authoritative voice. Though it didn't really didn't seem to do much at the moment.

Finally placing her down, Brooke gave him one good whack across the chest, which he completely deserved, and moved into the passenger seat. Nathan responded to her pitiful effort with only a short, but hearty laugh. Her force, while mighty for her petite frame, was in no way threatening to him.

"So, what's the deal? Where are we goin?" He asked, curiously.

"Well…just head to our spot. It's a secret 'boy toy'…"

…

Back at the Rivercourt Lucas and Rachel found a spot on the bleachers and had been sitting alone chatting, with beers in their hand for some time now. The effects of the alcohol had begun to loosen up the once-lovers. For a brief point in time it would have seemed that Rachel had forgotten about her little predicament, and Lucas about Brooke. Though, as with most moments, it quickly passed and both were left with their own depressing realities starring back at them.

…_**She closes her eyes, and says,**_

_**"One more drink to ease the pain,**_

_**Just to get it off my mind.**_

_**And, I apologize before I drink tonight,**_

_**Yeah, before I drink tonight."…**_

"So, how's about that game?" She finally suggested, noticing Lucas's more than average broodiness taking him over.

"Good idea. What game?"

"Okay, here's the idea: you miss a shot, and _you_ drink." She started to explain the rules, checking the ball in his direction.

Before she could get out the rest he got off a shot, lofting the ball in the air toward the hoop.

"You _make_ a shot…" She continued, waiting to see if his shot went in.

"And…" He turned to her with expectant eyes, after the ball had effortlessly sailed through the hoop.

"Well…then _I_ drink." She answered his prying eyes, while grabbing her can and taking a long swig of beer. "Ahh, so refreshing." She teased, as Lucas shot another. "Maybe this was a bad idea?" She remarked, taking another drink and joining his laughter.

….

The set up that Brooke had prepared at their spot, under the bridge, was great. She had basically transported a full-service mini-bar down there to make sure that all the makings for a perfect night: food, booze and entertainment, via a deck of playing cards, were waiting.

Nathan she figured, always easy to please in that regard would be thrilled. Well, at least she hoped as much. It would be hard bringing up the subject of Haley without Nathan becoming too defensive. She was fully aware of this unmistakable outcome. After the other day's events it seemed that he had fallen back to square one, Denialville. In fact, she could still hear that last conversation they had with Cooper, only moments after seeing Haley and Chris on TV. It was as if she had a tape recording of it playing on repeat constantly in her head.

_"Look guys, if there's one thing I know it's that love is a pretty great thing, maybe even the greatest thing. But it's gotta be true love, the real deal…for the both of you." He had explained, so pointedly._

_"What if it was? What if it still is?" Nathan and she had countered, respectively._

_"Well if it still is, then, you fight like hell for it. But the harder question is, what if it isn't? Trust me, that one's a bitch."_

At this point, all that Brooke was certain of was that she and Nathan were hurting. Denialville wasn't a particularly friendly place to be, but misery does love company…and they were both lonely. Why shouldn't they take this opportunity to comfort each other? They were, after all, best friends. What did they have to lose?

So, several drinks later, well into their night together, Nathan officially reached his maximum point. His pain had been so overwhelming that past week, building up into the monster that was eating away at his heart and soul that night, he absolutely could not handle it any longer. Immediately sensing his change in body language, Brooke forged a new, much bolder plan…to get their minds off of everything.

"Come on." She instructed, grabbing hold of his hand, pulling him slightly behind her towards the lake.

Catching on to where she was going with this idea he followed hesitantly. "Are you nuts? It'll be freezing!"

"Scared?" She taunted him, with a devilish grin…slowly taking of her shoes and socks.

"No." He responded defensively, anxiously watching as she inched closer and closer to the water.

"We don't have suits…you're not gonna wear that in are you?" He asked, nervously, referring to her clothing.

"Of course, not…" She replied, moving carefully, trying not to slip while she took off her jeans and top, then turning to face the opposite direction of where he stood.

Nathan's eyes instantly widened with both curiosity and desire. He hadn't given into his carnal needs in way too long. His defenses were weak. It didn't help that everything Brooke did, every movement she made, seemed sexual on some level, whether she intended it to be or not. She couldn't help it and he most certainly didn't blame her for that. Most of the time, these days, she didn't even notice her affect on the opposite sex. And before that moment _he_ certainly hadn't expected the control her naked body would have on him.

"Nathan Scott…when did you turn into my grandpa?" She teased, breaking him out of his thoughts. "Get in here already!"

"Uh, alright." He gave up, sliding in next to her. "Oh fuck it's cold!"

Snickering, at Nathan's womanly response to the cold water, Brooke offered some words of encouragement. "Come on pansy ass…let's race!"

"Have you completely lost your mind?" He asked, though by then she was already meters ahead. "Oh no you don't!" He caught up to her and pulled her back.

"Nathan!" She screeched as his arm grabbed a hold of her, making it impossible to escape. "Not fair…" She pouted.

Her charms easily persuaded him to let go, which only instigated further antics. After coming up for air, on a spontaneous truce, the two friends couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous they were acting, like rambunctious kids. It was fun though, and for the time being, it was doing the job of serving as a distraction. So they continued to horse around.

"Hey…Brooke." Nathan finally broke into their playful roughhousing, speaking for the first time in a more serious tone, almost apologetically. "I gotta tell you something." He moved closer to her, now standing only inches apart.

"Yea? What's up?"

"It's about Lucas." His gaze turned solemn. "I heard him talking to Rachel the other day…I know this is gonna sound crazy… but if you didn't hear it from him I wanted it to be me who told you…"

"What?" She questioned intently. "What is it?"

"Rachel has a kid…and Lucas is the father." There he said it, holding her shoulders now for support. Not sure how, how bad, she would react to the news.

Upon hearing those words the brilliant, beautiful and once so brave, Brooke Davis, practically collapsed into his arms. In a single tear, which fell down her face unnoticed, she let go of her faith in love. In that moment it had become crystal clear…hope was gone. With so many thoughts going through her mind she only had to know one thing.

_Had Nathan also betrayed me? Had he known this all along, like Lucas?_

"How long have you known?" Brooke asked.

"Just a week or so. I could never find the right time. Look, I'm sorry it took me this long. I know we don't keep secrets…it's just."

"I get it…" And she did. She had never been more grateful to have Nate as a friend.

Although emotionally numb from the news, the physical reality of the cold water began to penetrate deep into their bones. From standing still for so long their body temperatures had plummeted, falling to unbearably cold levels. Jumping out first, Nathan impulsively pulled Brooke out of the frigid waters. They both ran over to their clothes.

Unable to move any further she stood shivering. "Wha wh when di di didd it gg-et so ca-ca-cold in there?" She asked, her teeth chattering so much that her words were barely audible.

"I told you that was a stupid idea." He replied, rolling his eyes. "Here." He said, taking her naked frozen frame into his; offering his own body as heat.

"It's really over…isn't it? Brooke finally whispered, interrupting their silence.

"Haley said she was sorry. Said she loved me and it wasn't about Chris. She just…needed some time to figure everything out…" He mumbled out, in agony.

Stunned at his display of raw emotion, so similar to her own, Brooke quickly reacted, pushing them to a seemingly impossible closeness. "Haley probably does just need some time." She promised, lightly.

"You believe that crap?" He sneered, frustrated at how naïve she could be yet loving her for the attempt. He was now completely unfolding before her very eyes. "What's there to figure out? If she loves me and I love her…well then, there's nothing! It's not supposed to be like this B. Love's supposed to, I dunno…"

She knew it, as well as he did, there wasn't anything anyone could say or do to stop the pain or make it right. It's true, sometimes you just needed to let it out…and most of those times all your want is someone, a friend, to stop and listen. So, doing her best to be there for him, she desperately wiggled her arms around his waist, securing him tightly within her embrace and resting her head into his chest. It was the only thing she could think of in that split second that might have helped to calm him down. She was right it did…but not for long enough. At the sound of his enormous sigh the emotional flood gates opened again; this time with less strength to his words, as if he had been half defeated already.

"She said she was with Chris…on national TV! You saw it, Cooper saw it… I saw it with my own eyes…" He trailed off with the last part, glancing down at Brooke, for the first time, since he had first pulled her to him, their eyes met.

Her shivering had subsided by then, leaving them no reason to continue holding on to each other. Yet, as they stood together in the moonlight, something held them motionless and content. His crystal blue-grey eyes were left piercing through to her soft hazel ones, exposing weaknesses beyond their cracked exteriors.

Nathan looked so broken, so vulnerable…almost like a lost puppy dog. It broke Brooke's heart to see him suffering like that. She knew exactly how he felt. Like him, what she really wanted to do, more than anything was pretend her feelings for Luke didn't exist anymore. She wanted to believe Nathan and her could move on but, the truth was…they hadn't…neither had… and there wasn't a chance in the world of that happening if they continued to act the way they had been for so long; both holding on to the idea of a love that may never be equally reciprocated.

Sure, Lucas hadn't gone on MTV to announce his relationship with Rachel worldwide, like Haley had basically done, but really none of that mattered. Betrayal is a powerful force and in the end it hurts all the same.

…

It was getting late and Rachel was only getting sloppier by the minute. Playing a drinking game that entailed any sort of basketball shooting with Lucas had definitely been a bad idea.

"So, that's the last of it." She explained, smashing down the empty can, drunkenly.

"We gonna call it a night?" He asked, taking the ball from her.

"Or…" She smirked, kinking up her eyebrow. "We could play something else…like strip basketball?"

"I can't…"

"Is this about Brooke?" She asked, peeved by his lack of interest. "She's on a date with someone else!"

Looking upset he looked down at his feet before speaking. "Listen, Rach…I love you…you're a great girl. You really are…and a great mother to Parker. It's just…I'm completely _in love_ with Brooke. She's the 'one'. She's a huge part of my world…or at least she used to be…and she's slipping away."

"Wait, did you really just say, "she's the _one_…as in you honestly think there's only _one_ person on this entire planet that's _right_ for you? That's ridiculous. How could you possibly know that now?"

"She just is. I can't explain it. I just… feel it. You know, Pascal says: 'the heart has reasons that reason cannot know.'"

"And yet Pascal isn't with Brooke tonight is he? And neither are you…Nathan is." Noticing his obvious sensitivity to the subject she softened. "Sorry, low blow…okay…here, take your shirt off."

"Rachel." He warned, expecting the worst.

"Oh gosh…I'm not gonna rape you sissy boy…I mean please, it's not like I haven't had ya before." She took pleasure in reminding him of that. "Alright, so you say Brooke's the 'one'; your _soulmate_." She started explaining, standing behind him now, with his shirt in hand. "Well, if that's the case, call upon _destiny_ or… providence… or whatever forces are gonna bring you two together and make the shot…blindfolded."

"What?" He protested, half laughing. "Who's the ridiculous one?"

"Come on! If she is _really_ your destiny…well then you can't miss." She insisted hastily, while walking toward the basket. "Okay, can you see me now?"

"No." He told her, clearly telling the truth since he hadn't flinched an inch when she just flashed him.

"I trust you. Now, follow my voice. Brooke's the 'one', right? So…make the shot."

Lucas took his time before shooting, bouncing the ball once in place, aiming his shoulders to the best of his current handicapped capabilities…and then he just went for it.

"Wh-what happened?"

His shot was so perfect it was almost magical. The ball went through the hoop, all net. No backboard, no rim.

"It went in…she's all yours." She admitted, sadly, quickly turning to take off toward her car.

"Rach!" He yelled, after pulling his shirt off his eyes and seeing her make a beeline for the parking lot.

"Don't worry about me…seriously I don't deserve it!" She screamed back.

"You're drunk…stop! You could kill someone…or yourself. Let me drive." He attempted to reason with her.

"That last part you won't care too much about in a second. Okay…because I did the worst thing. I lied…I lied to you the night of the ball. Parker isn't yours!" She confessed, jumping into the drivers seat, revving the engine and just barely pulling out before Lucas hopped in beside her.

"What the hell are you talking about…Parker isn't mine? I heard your mom…he has HCM, the same genetic heart condition as me!"

By now Rachel had already made it out of the parking lot and was heading down the dark road ahead of them, at a dangerous pace. Any false move could send the two of them skidding off the street or worse into on-coming traffic.

…_**And, we're all a little careless.**_

_**Sometimes, I know it**__**'**__**s hard,**_

_**This lonely drink that's callin'.**_

_**It**__**'**__**s calling out for you,**_

_**No, it**__**'**__**s calling out for me…**_

"Seriously pull over and let me drive." Lucas begged her. Hoping, somehow through her constant tears and heavy cries, that she would listen to him and reconsider.

"I was just, you were just…_you_ came to me!"

She wasn't making much sense trying to explain her actions. She couldn't, even Rachel was confused, and the alcohol had left her mind so fuzzy.

_Why couldn't he have just let me leave…like I told him to!_ She thought, pulling out a small picture of Parker, which she always carried in her wallet. _I'm sorry baby, it's gonna have to be just you and me again, from now on._

"So this is somehow my fault? You lied to me…for this long, and it's my fault! No! How could you? I believed you!" He yelled, showing signs of his resentment.

Lucas was getting more and more angry at every moment of her silence, and she knew it. Gaining a little bit of courage from the image of her son, she now held in her hand, Rachel took a deep breath, and tried again; hoping for the best in this situation, but fearing the worst.

…_**With this lonely drink,**_

_**I apologize tonight…**_

"When you came to me, that night of the masquerade ball…asking about Parker?" She said, looking to him for acknowledgement, which she got in a nod. "Something about you had changed and I guess I just…froze. You looked at _me_ the way you used to, Luke… I missed feeling like that…_special_." She paused, waiting to see if he would respond, but he didn't. "You were so certain that he was your son and I didn't know why. Now I do…but I promise, I had no idea then…I'm so sorry. Its just…I-I thought maybe just maybe if you had looked at me like that once, you could look at me like that again, and we could be a family…It's stupid, I know. But, you were so amazing and willing to help with Parker and…I took advantage of you. I didn't plan to, but I did…and I can't take that back now…." She admitted, wiping her tears away with her arm. "I messed up and I know that. None of that changes what I did…I understand if you never want to talk to me again."

Embarrassed, Rachel looked back down at the picture of Parker. She turned it upside down, exposing the name on the back, "Parker Lee Gatina." It made her smile.

"Rachel!" Lucas screamed, grabbing her attention back. "Look out!"

The instant she looked up, focusing back on the road, her eyes fixated on the object of Lucas's concern; heading straight for them was another car. Before she had the chance to react otherwise, her instincts took over her and she jerked the steering wheel in the other direction, sending the car spinning towards the rail of the bridge. Desperately she slammed on the breaks, trying to stop the momentum of the vehicle, but it was already too late. Breaking through the side of the bridge they soared off the edge, heading straight for the water below them.

Witnessing the horrific accident, and partly feeling responsible, Cooper immediately stopped his own car, jumped out and ran to the edge that Rachel's car had fallen off. Seeing the car plunge into the water, he panicked.

"Rachel?" He shouted. "Rachel!"

Cooper stood shocked, pulling out his cell phone and calling 911. Running over to his side was Nathan, following shortly behind him, was a now hysterical Brooke.

"What the hell just happened?" Nathan yelled to his uncle.

"It was dark…the driver was in the middle of the road, it almost hit me, then she noticed me and swerved into the side there." He explained, showing them where the car went in, getting more nervous.

It was dark out but the bridge had bright lights, which made the scene visible enough.

"That's Rachel's car!" Brooke cried, noticing the license plate, before the car had completely submerged.

"There was a guy with her too, a blonde?" Cooper added.

"Lucas!" she gasped, looking at Nathan, who was already pulling off his shirt to jump in after them.

"I called 911. They should be here soon…"

"I can't take that chance…that's my brother down there!" Nathan exclaimed, diving in, without another thought.

"Nathan!" Brooke screamed. "No, Nathan!"

The next few minutes were probably the longest, most excruciating, moments that Brooke had ever experienced. It terrified her. Knowing that she could potentially lose Lucas or Nathan, or worse both, in only an instant. She feared the worst, never getting to hear their voices again, and kneeling out of exhaustion, she wept.

_Please God; don't take them away from me!_ She prayed to herself. _Just please, give me the chance to have them hear how much I love them, both. Please…please…please. I'll do anything, just bring them back to me…_

After what seemed like an hour, though in reality it hadn't been longer than a couple minutes, the ambulance finally arrived. Cooper was busy giving the details to the paramedics when Brooke looked up and saw Nathan and Rachel floating by some logs, no Lucas in sight.

"Over there!" She managed to get out, pointing over to her friend, before breaking into sobs again. "Do something!"

Cooper immediately jumped down and pulled his unconscious nephew and former fiancé out of the water. From there the paramedics took over, performing CPR.

Knowing Lucas had to be still trapped in the car, Cooper swam down to get a look. There he saw him. Swimming around to the other window, the one Nathan must have already kicked in to get Rachel, he reached him. He then tried to pull Lucas out, but the boy's seatbelt wasn't releasing properly. So, grabbing his pocketknife, he cut through the seat belt and freed him.

"Help!" He breathed once they had made it to the surface, trying to get the paramedics attention, as he ushered Lucas's limp body toward the side.

One of the men quickly brought Lucas on to dry land and began triaging. "I can't find a pulse! Get him in the cab."

Brooke watched on, hopelessly useless, as they loaded her friends into the ambulance and sped away. Standing alone now, she was left with only her sorrows. There were many lives in the balance, and no certainty in anything, this she knew.

…

William Shakespeare once wrote: "_My grief lies all within, and these external manners of lament are merely shadows to the unseen grief that swells with silence in the tortured soul…Death lies on her like an untimely frost upon the sweetest flower of the field."_

Walking up to the hospital that night, Brooke was reminded of words she had once read; from a book Lucas had suggested she read not long ago.

"_Only those who avoid love can avoid grief…"_

And that she felt strongly of, because death leaves a pain and heartache that no person, or amount of time, can heal, but love…true love, leaves a memory, which no one can steal.

"_The point is to learn from grief and remain vulnerable to love."_ --John Brantner

So there, in front of the emergency room doors, she stood. Afraid to move any further, fearful of what may come about once she entered. Yet clutching her arms to her chest, Brooke forced herself to move forward…on the belief that, Robert Fulghum's words were true:

"Imagination is stronger than knowledge - myth is more potent than history - dreams are more powerful than facts - hope always triumphs over experience - laughter is the cure for grief - and love… is stronger than death."

She promised herself…for Nathan and Lucas, she would remain forever vulnerable to love.

* * *

******Lyrics from this chapter were from "Weekend Apologies," by Thriving Ivory******


	11. Someone Else's Life

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **These characters belong to Mark Schwahn and the CW. I own none of them. No copyright infringement intended.

**A/N: **To make up for the lack of BL in the last chapter I went heavy on it in this one. So for those of you who were waiting for the aftermath of Rachel's admission it is limited. But, the BL is progressing nicely and we all know that's what it is all about right?

Anyways…please let me know what you think. I also added some links to my profile to give you an idea of some of the scenes from the past chapters. So, check it out. I'm gonna start to beg for reviews, I know it's tacky, but I really wanna know how you think this story is going so far. Thank you to my loyal readers. Hugs!

* * *

**Someone Else's Life**

…_**Somehow I'm leading**_

_**Someone else's life**_

_**I cut a star down **_

_**With my knife…**_

Nobody said this part was going to be easy; nobody blamed them for fearing the worst. Disasters happen every day, without any warning. Hearts are broken and faith is taken hostage; suffering never truly rests. Some believe facing tragedy is a test; that it wants to harden us, and it is our mission to never let it. Yet, when amidst great hardship, words and values and convictions, like so, cease to remain valid. The survivors, the ones left behind, become the illogical, forever searching for meaning out of grief.

So in a situation like this there was no silver lining, no moral that seemed to outweigh the consequences. A person, a good person, laid unconscious to the world as a result of another's foolishness. The guilt, despite countless attempts to console each other, only seemed to get worse. Yes, a darkness had settled over Tree Hill…

In the emergency room, after a long and frantic night, the chaos had finally started to subside. It seemed a light was breaking on the horizon; both Nathan and Rachel had come through, unharmed. The worst for them was over, and while Nathan still required observation, Rachel was free to go. Lucas, on the other hand, having been submerged and unconscious the longest of the three, suffered more serious complications. He had undergone several surgeries to repair massive internal bleeding and a collapsed lung. His fate was temporarily unwritten; time seemed to stand still, lingering on only in disillusion. For now, it was a waiting game and wait they would.

In true form, Karen had not left her son's bedside since the second she got to the hospital and Keith was never too far off. Brooke had multi-tasked back and forth between Nathan and Lucas's rooms, trying to be brave for everyone else's sake. Deep down, though, there wasn't a light heart among the bunch. This tragedy weighed heavily on them all, Rachel especially; her day for atonement would soon arrive, though at the moment she was the last of anyone's concern.

Until Lucas woke up, all eyes, hearts, wishes and prayers were with him. To be honest, though, considering the length of time he went without oxygen and the trauma his body had endured during impact, the broody blonde was lucky to be alive. The doctors attributed much of his resilience to the water's cold temperature, which brought on hypothermia and in turn delayed the onset of more serious neurological damage. Still, in all truthfulness, Cooper had freed him from the car with only moments to spare. Meaning, Lucas's survival could, in many ways, be viewed as an act of God, a miracle. In other words someone, up above, had to have been watching out for him.

…

Inside Lucas's room Karen sat patiently in the corner. Her concentration never wavered from him; his every move mentally noted of. Each flinch, every muscle spasm, sent her anxious heart racing in both hope and apprehension.

…_**My hands shake**_

_**My knees quake…**_

Then there was Brooke, standing outside of his ICU room, pacing nervously to prepare, or rather postpone, seeing the shattered look on Karen's face. That sadness, which emanated from Lucas's mother, was unavoidable and tore the poor girl to pieces. As much as it pained her to admit, she knew, there wasn't anything else to do other than continue being strong for the both of them.

"Hey, can I come in?" Brooke spoke quietly, as she poked her head in the doorway.

"Oh," Karen replied, startled. "Of course you can sweetheart, take a seat…"

"How's he doing?"

"Same. Dr. Wilson came in about an hour ago, said his vitals were still stable, the surgery seemed to have went well and now we just have to wait until he wakes up." She sighed.

"And how long do they expect that will take?"

"They didn't really say…a day, a week, whenever he is ready to come back to us." She explained, giving the news as optimistic as humanly possible, given the situation.

Brooke just nodded in sympathy, making her way over to Lucas's side. She knew no one wanted to say it but the possibility still existed that he would never wake up. However, there was no way she would let herself believe that; she had to have faith that he would come back. The other option was too excruciating to live with.

Looking down at his pale bruised face, she forced out a smile, grabbed his hand and squeezed it tight. It was pure torture seeing him like that, so helpless. "You come back to us soon, okay?" She whispered, letting out a single tear, choking up on the last word.

…

Lucas groggily opened his eyes and sat up, looking around the room confused at all the medical equipment. The last thing he remembered was hitting the edge of the bridge. He must have passed out right after that because he couldn't remember how he had gotten here or anything in between. It was all a blur to him but something was definitely off.

He knew he couldn't possibly feel as good as he did right now after nearly plunging to his death. He felt himself over in disbelief, checking his body for cuts, scrapes, bruises, and found: _nothing_. In fact, he was still wearing the same street clothes from earlier, and they were surprisingly spotless, as if the accident had never happened.

_Weird_, he thought, scratching his head. _Did I dream the accident up? No, that's impossible. Am I dead? Maybe. No. Wait. Could I be? Is there a heaven, then? Is this heaven?_

Lucas didn't know what to believe. There was only one thing he was sure of, and that was that there had to be a reason behind all of it, some sort of explanation.

…_**And right now**_

_**I still see the way the moon**_

_**Plays this tune**_

_**Though our lights died...**_

"You know she loves you right?" Said the curly haired blonde, dressed in all black, sitting in the corner. He hadn't noticed her until that very moment.

"Who loves me?" He turned to the girl. "Peyton? Is that really you?" He gasped, now taking in her full form, as she walked closer to him, not-believing his own eyes. "But, you're _dead_…"

"Yea, thanks for the reminder. Genius!" She shot back sarcastically.

"So then what's going on here; am I dead?" Lucas looked at her more perplexed than ever, silently begging her to offer up an explanation for this madness.

"Eh, not exactly." She sighed, not wanting to go into it any further. "Come on."

"Where are you taking me?"

"Oh god…must you be so difficult?" She rolled her eyes, continuing her theatrics until she saw the terrified look on his face. "Don't worry, it's not true what they say…you don't go to hell for usin the big guy's name in vain." She joked.

"So, I'm not exactly dead, but we're in heaven? How the heck does that work?"

"You'll see…" She said, walking out the door, as he followed hesitantly behind. "Listen, I'm not here to make you understand or believe in anyone or anything but _yourself_. This will be harmless, trust me."

"Trust _you_…the gothic looking black angel without wings? You look like you're dressed for Halloween!"

"Maybe I am…maybe I celebrate year long?" She continued at pace, unscathed by his comment.

"I don't have a choice do I?"

"Not really, but I thought I'd let you stay in limbo for a minute. You know, practice for later when you actually will have to decide…"

The two walked until they had reached the Tree Hill Cemetery. In the near distance an elderly woman knelt over a vintage gravestone. Even in her old age the woman was unmistakably Brooke Davis. Lucas could feel the woman's pain and anger right away. And, as they got closer they could, both, hear her cries of resentment.

"You promised! You said we'd grow old together…and look at me, shriveled up like a prune…_alone_." The grey haired woman wept in haste.

"Is that my…" Lucas started to ask.

"No." Peyton assured him, placing her fragile hand on his shoulder, looking directly into his eyes. "It's mine. She's talking to me…_I_ let her down. Brooke could never let go of that pain, she still blames herself for my death."

"I don't understand." He rubbed his head in confusion. "She's never gone to see you here; she always goes to your drawing spot. That's where she feels at peace, connected to you. What happened to this Brooke?"

"Nothing. See, that's the point. The Brooke you know doesn't go to that spot because she connects with me; she connects with _you_. You've gotta understand something. Okay?" She paused; taking a deep breath as if the words she was about to say physically pained her. "I regret more than anything the way things ended. I was sick and too proud to ask for help. I was selfish and now I know it wasn't me who suffered. It was her. But _you_; you brought her peace and love when she needed it most. You didn't know it then, but your love gave her the strength to let go, to forgive herself and me. And, Luke, you have to believe me, when I say, that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't feel grateful to you for saving us both."

Lucas just stood silently in shock; the world works in mysterious ways. He never, in a million years, would have imagined that it was he who had made the difference all along. In fact, he had always partly blamed himself for Peyton's death, for not saying anything to her sooner. Yet, the girl standing next to him now seemed to be a different person, entirely. She wore a gentle smile, one he had never witnessed before. It reminded him of how she had once drawn herself. That image had been imprinted in his mind since the moment he had looked at it. It was the only piece she had ever painted in color, a montage of memories of a young Peyton, with her mother and Brooke.

"You know I used to watch you draw everyday…" Lucas finally broke the silence.

"Ha…how could I _not_ notice with you always lurking around in the distance?" She scoffed back. "I mean, let's be honest, you were never great at staying under the radar or appearing aloof by any normal standards."

"Yea, I guess I didn't." He blushed, embarrassed.

"But, that's all in the past, now. Plus, I think Brooke kinda digs that creepy-stalker, hero-complex vibe you've got going on…so, the two of you are obviously meant for each other."

At that, Lucas and Peyton dropped the former subject and watched in unison as Brooke's older version set down a stack of papers before walking off somberly, head down to the world. The two moved closer, now standing directly over Peyton's grave.

…_**It's every day, the same way.**_

_**Cos then came you, then there's you.**_

_**I keep your picture**_

_**In my worn through shoes.**_

_**Then there's you, Then came you.**_

_**When I'm lost,**_

_**I look at my picture of you...**_

"Hey, these are your drawings…" He gazed up at her, bending down to look through them. "Didn't I find these?"

"In another life you did, but what if you hadn't? This is the world in which you had chosen to lead a different life, remember? You don't exist to Brooke here."

The thought of that reality was harder to swallow than he had expected. "Well, what about _real_ life, huh? Where's that?"

"Don't worry. Real life is still there, if you choose it to be."

"Okay, so…why did you throw them out, anyway?" He questioned, handing the stack back to her. "I never understood that…"

"Listen to me. 'At this moment there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world. Some are running scared. Some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day. Others are just now facing the truth. There are six billion people in this world, Lucas. Six billion souls. And sometimes, all you need is one.' You are that _one_ for Brooke. I knew _you_ would find them."

"How?" He asked surprised, even though he felt it, too.

"I just did. Luke, look into your heart. It may be damaged physically but it's a good one and it's what makes you, _you_. It's what makes you touch so many people's lives. So, the next time you wonder if being the best version of yourself matters, you look into Brooke's eyes, and every time you do you'll know that it has and that it does. Don't close that off."

Lucas couldn't move. He stood motionless, looking at Peyton's portrait of Brooke. The woman he had just seen was nothing like the girl he knew and loved; the brilliant, beautiful and brave Brooke Davis. No, this Brooke was sad and bitter and _alone_; that was far from how it was supposed to be.

"Get me out of here! I can't be in this world any longer." Lucas begged.

With that the broody blondes found themselves in Tree Hill High School's audio-visual room. It was small and dark inside, only a camera, a seat, and a single light shining on the girl sitting and speaking before it.

"Hey there future people, I'm Brooke Davis. I know you're probably looking at this and making fun of my outfit, right? Anyways, what I think you really need to know is: cherish every day; shit happens. You only get one chance, one life…and what you do with it, well that's up to you. Just don't be scared, okay, because I used to be and the alternative is _so_ much cooler. I know there aren't a whole lot of moments in life that you can look back on and say '_that's_ when it all changed,' but when you find yourself in one of those situations, here's my advice: take advantage of it. And, ladies, unicorns do exist!" She perked up, smiling to herself, winking at the camera before letting out a tiny giggle. She knew she sounded insane considering no one else would understand she and Peyton's inside joke about unicorns, but that was part of the fun.

At that point Lucas's gaze instinctively shifted onto Peyton. Equally amused by her old friend's comment, unable to contain herself; she was grinning sheepishly, ear to ear.

…_**And somehow**_

_**I'll make tonight our own**_

_**I'll show you every way I've grown**_

_**Since I met you…**_

"Unicorns?" He asked, flashing his famous squinty eyes toward Brooke and then back again at Peyton, baffled by their obvious connection to the word, which he was clearly unaware of. Even more puzzling was this version of Brooke. She was unfamiliar to him too. "She's so _happy_…"

"Shhh!" Peyton glared at him, motioning his attention back to Brooke, who had begun talking again.

"I'll be the first to admit, up until this year, I wasn't a very good person. Sure, I was the rich, popular girl, got invited to all the parties, dated tons of hot senior guys.... but those things didn't make me _happy_. I wasn't who I wanted to be, all that I could be…what I was meant to be, who, deep down, I know I am. See, the things we think will make our lives better: money, popularity, and fame... they don't. It's the simple things, like friendship, family and…_love_."

Brooke looked down, pausing for a moment as she wiped the tear from her cheek, feeling foolish for being so emotionally candid. She looked up and unknowingly met eyes with Lucas. For a brief second he felt as though she could see him standing there.

"Anyways, sorry… moving on. My point is, life can get pretty messy, and it can kick you down, but sooner or later, you become a fighter, not just a survivor. You realize somewhere out there is something better, something that is worth fighting for. I didn't wish for love this year; love found me and that's when it all changed. I regained hope; that feeling that everything's going to be okay and that there's going to be someone around to help make sure of it. I immersed myself in someone else. I woke a heart long afraid to feel and for the first time…I fell in love. And, you know what, wanting to be loved, falling in love, opening yourself up to somebody that makes your heart ache in a good way... feeling understood, that's what it's all about. At least that's what I know it should be about. That's why, if you're robots, or aliens, or something and you're watching this right now and that feeling no longer exists; well…you missed out, I feel sorry for you. Because, when life gets hard, when things change, true love is the one thing that always remains the same. So, whenever I lose faith I turn to what somebody amazing once told me, she said: Sweetheart, it's all gonna be okay; 'people who are meant to be always find their way back in the end.' I believe that…"

Smiling more confidently than ever before, Brooke stood up from her seat, quickly shut off the monitor and exited the room; leaving Peyton and a stunned, speechless Lucas behind.

"I still don't get what any of that had to do with a _unicorn_…" He told her as soon as the door had shut. But, she was so…"

"Happy? Yea. Look, the thing about Brooke is, it's really hard for her to let her guard down. But when she does, she's got this incredible heart. You once told her she was brilliant, beautiful and brave, that she was going to change the world someday…and she needed that. She needed the quiet satisfaction of knowing someone believed in her."

"I did believe in her. I still do."

"True, but you didn't have to say it and you did…and you don't have to turn her sketches into Rogue Vogue, but you would have. Because of that this Brooke's a better person."

"But, I haven't gotten to mail her sketches out yet." Lucas sighed, disappointedly.

"Precisely; neither has any of what we just saw happened, _yet_."

"So, you're saying this Brooke is happier because of…me?"

"Seriously? I literally showed it to you! You can't possibly be _that_ dense." Peyton threw her hands up in defeat. "Yes! If you must be told…yes. For the one hundred billionth time, yes! Is that clear enough for you, Romeo?"

"Yes…" Lucas smiled now, cocking his head to the side, obviously pleased.

"Hero-complex." She scoffed. "What have I been saying all along…creepy!"

Lucas ignored her. "Hey, how did you know about the Rogue Vogue thing?"

"Don't be silly. I'm a spirit remember. We don't exactly get the soap opera channel where I'm from; we make due watching people like you."

"Nice, so my misery is entertainment to you people?" He accused.

"And your happiness…we don't discriminate." She teased.

"You know for an angel you're pretty evil."

"Who ever said anything about me being an angel?" She asked hastily.

"Oh, I guess I just assumed…" He tried to explain, hoping he hadn't been offensive in some way. "Then, what are you?"

Peyton recognized the opportunity to mess with Lucas and seized it. "I'm a…" She started to say in a serious tone, pausing to build suspense, like she was in a horror film about to reveal her true identify. "A _Unicorn_!" She shouted over-dramatically, her hands outstretched waving in the air, clicking her heels together, all at the same time.

"You're a real ass you know that?" He remarked, annoyed that Peyton found pleasure in torturing his ignorance to unicorn phenomena.

"Yea, I think I've been told that once or twice. Guess I'm just a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside a bitch." She sighed, nonchalantly, getting ready to leave.

"Well you hit the bitch part on the head." He barked back.

_And I had a crush on this girl?_ He thought. _What was I thinking?_

"Come on…chop, chop, we don't have forever, well at least you don't…"

Before he could protest they were back standing by what looked like his hospital room. Only this time his body was already there, lying in the bed, hooked up to the machines. Sitting in the corner, fruitlessly pretending to be interested in George Bernard Shaw's "Man and Superman," was Brooke. Karen was standing beside his bed, moving her gentle motherly hand up and down his arm. It was clear by the dark circles under their eyes that neither had been able to sleep much since the accident. Fatigue had set upon both of them like a plague.

"What the hell is this?" Lucas asked, not wanting to go any further.

"Well, it isn't actually _hell_, you know. Come on, indulge me a little…member that soap opera I love so much? Welcome to the live showing of "Brucas Tree Hill…" Peyton announced, shoving Lucas into the room.

"Okay so let's see. What have you missed? Well, the Hornets won against the Pistons 91-87. It was a close game. And Kobe Bryant is still leading in points per game. So not much has changed there…" Karen relayed the headlines from the sport section of the day's paper to a comatose Lucas.

Her words caught Brooke's attention. "I didn't know you were a big basketball fan?"

"I'm really not. Actually, it scares the hell out of me when Lucas is out there playing, but I know it's important to him so I try and keep up."

"Yeah I know what you mean." She waived the copy of the book she had been trying to read. "I'm basically suffering through _this_ for him. It's Lucas's idea of excitement…swapping books. I mean, I'd much rather go shopping, but alright, fine…it's different. Would it kill a guy to read a little Stephanie Meyer once in a while, though?"

Lucas shot a knowing look at Peyton and they all exchanged a few laughs, before Karen's attention focused on the Chinese symbol etched in permanent ink on Lucas's arm. Brooke immediately noticed and regretted her influence regarding that subject.

"I'm sorry. That's totally me. It was a spur of the moment thing. He was just so serious all the time, you know?"

"So you thought a tattoo might lighten him up? Jesus, what happened to going to the movies?" She sighed, changing her tune a bit when she saw the overwhelming guilt and agony in Brooke's eyes. "I guess with all things considered that tattoo wasn't half bad. Better than drunkenly driving him off a bridge, and nearly killing him!"

The stress overwhelmed Karen so much that she had to sit down to avoid collapsing. Brooke jumped to her side with a cup of water, making sure she was alright.

"Is _this_ really necessary?" Lucas pleaded. "Seeing my mom like this…"

"You're gonna need to hear this." Peyton protested.

…_**And right now**_

_**I'll be the boy in your next song**_

_**I'll learn the parts and play along**_

_**If you let me…**_

"Hey, Karen." Brooke spoke softly. "I want you to know. The only thing I really want is to see Lucas laugh again. You know, watch him squint his eyes at me in disbelief when I butcher the name of his awful emo bands, hear him recite poems that are so old school they don't even sound like he's speaking English. I would do anything to see him smile like that again. I guess what I'm trying to say is… this accident it reminded me that the perfect act of love is sacrifice. That's what Keith did for you. He buried his feelings for all those years so he could be a good friend. And yea, I'm crazy about Lucas. You know that already. I think I have been since the first moment we locked eyes, but I understand with everything going on…Rachel and the baby, he needs me to take a step back and let go, and I'm gonna do it. Because above all, I just want him to be happy, I want that with all my heart."

"Thank you, Brooke. That means a lot. And it takes a special person to admit that. I think you already know this but part of the reason I love Keith so much is because he's also my best friend."

Brooke smiled and nodded, slowly standing up from where she was kneeling next to Karen. She then moved over to Lucas's bedside, grabbed his limp hand and held it close to her heart. "You're always saving me. Please let me find a way to save you." She whispered, resting her head on his chest for a moment before saying a tearful, "good-bye," and walking off.

"Sweetheart, it's all gonna be okay…" Karen started to remind her.

Then the scene in front of them faded away and Lucas realized something; you _can_ be a big part of someone else's life and not know it. One life _does_ have the power to impact the world. And, when we find ourselves at a crossroads it's the _choices_ we make in those moments that define the rest of our days. One man has the ability to change many lives…he just has to _believe_ it. Now, thanks to Peyton, he believed it.

"I have to go back!" Lucas shouted, pacing around the room.

"That a boy! I knew you'd come around." Peyton stated proudly, patting him on the back. "Promise me something okay…"

"Sure…what?"

"Promise me you won't make the same mistake I did, promise me you won't _ever_ give up on her, Luke; that you'll fight like hell for her…because if you go back there's still gonna be tough times ahead; some heartache. But you're getting a second chance and, in the end she's worth it; _happiness_ and _love_ are worth it. Don't ever forget that; don't ever lose hope. Just remember, this is Brooke we're talking about; you know as well as I do, she's gonna be scared…letting you in, again, it won't be easy for her. So, you're gonna have to be patient and give her time. She'll come around."

"I promise. So, how do I get back?" He asked, anxiously.

"It's simple…all you have to do is open your eyes."

And then the darkness set in again and Peyton was gone, leaving in her absence: a guiding light.

…

"_Life will come rushing at you from out of the darkness. When it does, her love will guide you to the light…open your eyes, just open you eyes!"_

From Peyton's voice, Lucas could feel the pain rush back to the surface. His life forcing itself out from within the darkness. Then it happened; he opened his eyes, blinking as he canvassed the blurry room, searching for a sign. And there she was, standing meekly, clutching the doorknob, about to leave.

…_**If you let me,**_

_**I'll show the world to you.**_

_**Yes, if you let me,**_

_**I'll know just what to do…**_

"Brooke." He called, in the typical post-op raspy voice. "Mom." He followed, seeing her second, now smiling at the sight of his two favorite women.

"Oh my god, Luke!" They said together, darting to his side. He was still smiling.

"There it is, there's that smile I wanted to see." Brooke winked at Karen.

"Hey, have either of you ever had a dream that seemed so real, you didn't know what to believe?" Lucas pondered, aloud.

"Hmm, I guess. Sometimes I think Peyton visits me in my sleep. I know that probably sounds crazy but, yea…dreams can be pretty powerful stuff."

"Yea," Lucas agreed, keeping the irony of the situation to himself.

"I guess I'll leave you two, now. It's almost past visiting hours anyway.

…_**When I'm lost**_

_**In your eyes**_

_**I see a way for me…**_

"Actually, Mom, could I have a minute with Brooke before she leaves, _alone_?" Lucas asked, timidly. "It's important."

"Oh…sure." Karen started to walk out. "I'm gonna get a soda then. Do you want anything?"

"Water's fine, thanks though."

Brooke found her way back to his side nervously, giving him that glimpse of hope he needed, which he returned with an endearing smile. She had noticed his demeanor around her had changed in the past month, since the formal, but this look went far beyond anything she had ever felt, even when they had dated. It was as if his eyes could see into her world, her soul, and the feeling was mutual.

She wanted to embrace him but imagined that would for sure defeat the purpose of trying to seem disconnected from him. The instant they would have touched he would have felt her heart racing out of control, an effect they often had on each other, and known. She was really starting to wonder how Keith managed all those years.

"So, what did you need to talk about?" She asked, having regained some composure. "Is everything alright?"

"I just, I need to be honest with you…"

"Lucas." She warned, giving him the "let's not go there" eyes, but he couldn't miss this chance.

"You don't have to say anything, just listen. My dad, Dan, he never wanted me okay; he didn't want to claim me; he never even wanted me to be born…"

"Luke, I know about Rachel and the baby..." She cut him off. "I get it. And, you know what, I would have understood it even if that meant we couldn't be together. What I couldn't understand was why you couldn't let me in…it was like you thought I was pushing you away when really I was holding on for dear life…that hurt the most."

He sighed, understanding for the first time how wrong he had been for keeping her in the dark. "Who told you?"

"Nathan."

He nodded. "Look, I'm so, so incredibly sorry. I was wrong. I should have told you. I just…I thought, you know what… it doesn't even matter now…Rachel lied. I'm not the father."

"What?" Brooke growled. "That little wench! I knew she was a slutty lying liar who lies!"

The reality that this whole mess had been fabricated the entire time threw the beautiful brunette into a vicious tirade. Lucas let out a quiet laugh, clasping her hands in his. He was amused by her furious banter. She was even more adorable when she got angry, but he would have to calm her down because what he planned to tell her would change everything.

"After the accident I had this moment, when it all just became clear to me; I couldn't die. Do you know why? Because, I had to come back and look into those hazel-green eyes of yours and tell you I love you, I do, I love you Brooke. I know we are just friends right now, but I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis. You could never push me away, I came back for you, and no matter how long it takes, I'll wait for you..."

There were no words to describe how Brooke felt in that moment. Overwhelmed maybe, stunned for sure, but more than anything she was speechless. His words took her breath away in both a good and bad way. She wanted to scream out that she loved him too, but damn it that was just too much, too soon. There was no doubt that she loved him, but a lot had changed since they were together and she was starting to appreciate her newfound independence. If there was anything she had learned in these past few months it had been that you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else. And she had just started to find herself. So, as much as she wanted to ignore that fact, pull his lips to hers and get lost in passion once more, she couldn't. She deserved more than that and so did he.

Lucky for her, Karen and Lucas's nurse walked in at that very second saving her from responding. Her mind was spinning erratically; her emotions were all out of whack. All she wanted to do was jump on her bed and roll around like a love struck idiot. Lucas just had that affect on her. She was grateful to have an escape. Now she could savor that moment and figure things out.

_I didn't think guys like him actually existed…sweet and sincere, and hot?_ She thought, slipping through the door to leave, stealing one last look at him. _He's like a freaking unicorn!_

…

Brooke sat on her bed flipping through the pages of the George Bernard Shaw book she had been reading earlier. She knew there was a line in there that fit perfectly with how she was feeling right now…she had to find it.

"A-hah!" She thought, aloud. "Clearly, this Shaw guy had his heart broken once or twice."

"_There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it."_

She sighed, slumping down into her bed.

Back at the hospital Lucas read quietly, trying to distract himself from his own inner thoughts. He was stronger than even he knew. For to sit patiently with a longing that had not yet been fulfilled, and to trust that, in time, that dream will be shared and become reality… that is the truest test of love; that is having hope. There was no doubt that he had hope.

Erik H. Erikson once wrote: _'Hope is both the earliest and the most indispensable virtue inherent in the state of being alive. If life is to be sustained hope must remain, even where confidence is wounded, trust impaired…'_ He read to himself.

"This guy sure knew what he was talking about…"

In the meantime, Brooke had been having a terribly hard time getting to sleep. Her feelings were everywhere. The reality of Lucas's words had hit her but she still couldn't fully take it in and she eventually succumbed to her thoughts.

_He must have been on some serious drugs, right?_

She desperately wanted to divert any true feelings, which emerged from tonight; though, in contrast, she was about to unearth the mask that hid her own desires, fears and utter vulnerability.

_But, see what makes this so hard is that there are these places. Places, on my body, in my heart, where his fingerprints still rest, where his kisses and scent still linger and the whispers of his voice remain, echoing softly to remind me that a part of him will forever and always stay a part of me_…

There was no sense denying it any longer; his heart was etched in hers…and hers was etched in his. Yes, it was only a matter of time before their two hearts would become one.

* * *

*****Lyrics from this chapter are from "Someone Else's Life," by Joshua Radin.*****


	12. Time

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. All characters belong to Mark Schwann and the CW.

**A/N: **FYI…this chapter is set in present time. So be prepared, some things have changed. I'm sure there will be a lot of unknowns left after reading this, but how else am I going to get you all to continue reading! Anyways, please review. I'm not getting nearly as many as I had hoped for and I'm starting to wonder if maybe this story is not worth it so please give me your input. To those of you who have been faithful readers and fans…thank you…you know I appreciate it! If there is anything you'd like addressed let me know. Hope you enjoy this little snippet into the current lives of our favorite heroines Brooke and Haley. Think of it as an intermission and don't worry, as I have always said… "People who are meant to be always find their way back…in the end."

* * *

**Time**

…_**Time here, all but means nothing **_

_**Just shadows that move across the wall**_

_**They keep me company, but they don't ask of me**_

_**They don't say nothing at all.**_

_**And I need just a little more silence**_

_**And I need just a little more time**_

_**But you send your thieves to me**_

_**Silently stalking me**_

_**Dragging me into your wall**_

_**Would you give me no choice in this?**_

_**I know you can't resist, trying to reopen a sore…**_

There was a familiar quality about Karen's Café that never failed to set Haley's mind at ease, even today. Looking around, it was obvious why; the place hadn't changed in the least bit. After all these years it was still exactly the way she remembered it. That was something she could no longer say for herself, or any of her friends, for that matter. Yes, the Café, it was like an everlasting time capsule, which held the souls of a past life: their' past life.

"Wow…Brooke, I'm so sorry. I had no idea what you all went through back then." Haley admitted, shamefully.

The tawny haired former musician was beginning to realize just how much she had missed while gone on tour her senior year. It was, in a way, very much bittersweet. Rehashing over the past, like they had been doing for the last several hours, made that fact all the more evident.

"Yea, things were pretty crazy when you were gone. And you know they only got crazier when you came back…" The wavy haired brunette sighed, reminiscently. For the first time, in what seemed like forever, Brooke had begun to air out the secrets, which held them in place all those years ago. "I warned you didn't I?"

"Yes. You did." Haley smiled, curtly, taking her cell phone out of her purse to check the time.

It was already past midnight; too late to continue at the rate they had been going. There was still far too much left unsaid to assume otherwise. In the grand scheme of things, Stephen King was right, when he said:

"_Time takes it all, whether you want it to or not…time bears it away, and in the end there is only darkness. Sometimes we find others in that darkness, and sometimes we lose them there again."_

In that moment, among the night's shadows abounding from darkness, denial set in between two long-lost friends. It would have been hasty for them to go on revisiting the memories at this point, senseless really. They had suffered in silence for five long years, all of them. They both just needed a little more time. So, what was one more day? Besides, without rest, neither would be able to face what lied ahead.

"Okay. Same place, same time, tomorrow…" Haley confirmed, briskly walking away, trying to convince herself that she had made the right decision in confronting Brooke.

Yes, soon, the secrets to their past would be re-awakened, forced to be retold in entirety, a terrifying reality, especially for Brooke. However, it was unavoidable, would always be there; she had no other choice. Everyone knows time can only bear one's pain for so long. Their time had run out.

_But, what was the big deal?_ She thought, aimlessly walking the empty streets, amidst a place she had once called home. _What do I have to lose? What did any of them have to lose? After all, hadn't they already lost it…the one thing that mattered most, what life was supposed to be all about: happiness and love?_

It seemed to her that those emotions were a thing of the past. Unattainable ideals that now only existed to taunt her, remind her, of a time and place in which she had both. That was the hardest part; knowing.

…_**You see love-- a tight, thorny thread that you spin in a circle of gold**_

_**You have me to hold me**_

_**A token for all to see**_

_**Captured to be yours alone…**_

Sure, Brooke had managed to feign happiness throughout much of her young adult life. To the world, she had it all: money, fame, the whole nine yards. She even had the perfect home, including the great guy and beautiful daughter, she had always wanted. So, in many ways Brooke had experienced a lot of joy in her short existence. Though, they were only glimpses in comparison to what she knew could have been, with Lucas.

…

As soon as Haley walked over the threshold of her apartment's doorway she noticed lights were on in her living room. Considering it was nearly one o'clock in the morning, she knew Lucas had to be to blame. He was the only culprit hardheaded and obnoxious enough to wait up for her on a night like this. Hearing the all too familiar sounds of ESPN on the television only solidified her feelings on the subject.

_Oh I'm going to really hit him this time!_ She thought, taking her time to prepare for the massive ambush he was likely planning to throw her way. _Ever since that damn trip to LA, ugh! He's miserable. All he ever does is write, write, write! Why couldn't he have used his talents and written me a note instead of waiting here! Actually, now that I think about it, if he hadn't been such a stubborn moron, in the first place, he could have just gone to the damn reunion himself! That would have saved us both a lot of trouble…selfish fool! But, no…Lucas Scott is too proud a man to ever impose like that, right? Yea, on anyone else but me, maybe. I mean it's the middle of the night for Christ sake! Would he worry about something like that? Nope! "Torture good Ol' Hales…she's just as miserable as I am?" That's what he must be thinking…_

Knowing she wouldn't be able to hold off his presence any longer Haley entered her living room. Looking up from the remote, Lucas's piercing blue eyes caught her gaze, almost immediately.

"You reunite and fall madly in love with any dashing, new and improved, versions of the dumbasses you once tutored? Like _you_ had hoped for. Or are they all still the same jackass losers I told you they'd be?" He finally asked, cackling to himself.

"Well, I see it takes one to know one, eh?" She countered.

"Whatever…" He went back to fidgeting with the remote.

"What are you doing here, Luke? I know you didn't stay up all this time to berate me about something we both know you could care less about." She paused, trying to read his non-verbal cues. "Where's Jamie anyways?" She started to panic, looking around her room, focusing in on the empty beer cans that were now scattered about. "Have you been drinking?"

"He's with my mom and Lily, chill!"

His answer temporarily calmed her down, but she was far from satisfied with his current behavior. All of this had to stop.

"Luke…remember when you and Nathan came to visit me in New York and you saw my tattoo of his jersey number for the first time?"

"You mean your, slutty little tramp stamp?" He said, pointing to the small of her back where "23" had slightly faded but still remained.

"I am so barely your friend right now. I'm serious Scott you're on thin ice…" She warned, moving to sit next to him on the couch.

"Sorry." He threw up his hands in surrender. "I meant to say: your very classy example of young love's devotion?" He grinned.

"You just don't get it, do you?" She sighed. "I mean, back then, I was so scared; everything was happening so fast. I was falling in love… at the same time I was touring the country performing music, living out my dream. I was so unsure of his feelings, of my feelings...I thought it had to be one or the other, Nathan or music, but it _never_ had to be that way." She turned to him more seriously. "You gave me something that day…do you know what I'm talking about? I'll never forget it."

His blank stare signaled he hadn't a clue what she was referring to. So, out of her pocket, she pulled out the crumpled looking piece of paper, the same one he had given her all those years ago and started reading it:

"_Out of the night that covers me,_

_Black as the Pit from pole to pole,_

_I thank whatever gods may be_

_For my unconquerable soul._

_In the fell clutch of circumstance_

_I have not winced nor cried aloud._

_Under the bludgeoning of chance_

_My head is bloody, but unbowed._

_Beyond this place of wrath and tears_

_Looms but the Horror of the shade,_

_And yet the menace of the years_

_Finds, and shall find me, unafraid._

_It matters not how strait the gate,_

_How charged with punishments the scroll_

_I am the master of my fate:_

_I am the captain of my soul."_

"Invictus, William Ernest Henley." He smiled. "Yea so what about it?"

"Look, we can't change or erase what's happened in the past, but if you're always looking for reasons not to be with somebody, you'll always find 'em. It's that simple, Luke. At some point we're gonna have to stop blaming everyone else for our own misery." Haley paused again, turning to face him, forcing Lucas to listen. "You know what I regret the most? That I didn't listen to my heart when I had the chance."

"She left, not me!"

"You're unbelievable…" She rolled her eyes. "We're not kids anymore, you know, it really hurts me what your doing!"

"What am I doing, Hales?" He asked, partly annoyed. "Enlighten me…"

"You're doing it again! You're hiding your heart!"

"I'm just giving her what she wanted…"

"Says who?"

"Why do you care?"

"Well, for one you're my best friend, and two, you're my best friend!"

"Things change, that's all." He sighed.

"I'm not buying that, not for a minute. You're drunk and real stupid you know that! All I have to say is coming from someone whose been holding onto something for so long, you seem pretty quick to let it go."

"I'm not letting go!" He shouted back, offended by her remark. "It's just…it's up to her now. I can't keep pining over her and I sure as hell can't control her.

The broody blonde then picked up his keys and moved to let himself out. "Listen, I gotta go, okay. I'll bring Jamie by tomorrow morning."

He hadn't gotten farther than the front door when Haley had caught up to him, a little out of breath, placing her hand on his shoulder.

"What changed Luke? What happened in LA that you won't tell me?"

Unwilling to discuss it any further Lucas gently removed her hand from his back and turned around, heading to his car, without so much as another word. Before long, he had disappeared down the road, leaving her bewildered, confused and above all exhausted. Haley regretfully gave in and retreated to her bed for the night.

…

The next morning Haley woke up to the sounds of two rambunctious 5 year olds running through her apartment and Karen fixing breakfast in the kitchen. As she strolled down the stairway to the main level, where everyone was at, she remembered the conversation she and Lucas had had the night before. She wondered if Lucas might have told his mother anything about the LA situation. Perhaps something that he hadn't wanted to share with her.

"Hey Karen!" Haley greeted her guest. "So what's the occasion? You went all out this morning…my kitchen isn't gonna know what to think!" She joked.

The kitchen was full of breakfast foods; eggs, bacon, pancakes, sausage, fruit, basically anything you could imagine was sitting out there for the taking. Haley plopped down at the table and without further delay started picking away at the food as if she hadn't eaten in over a decade.

"So the food meets your standards I see?" Karen teased, taking a seat.

"Oh my gosh, yes! This is amazing…but, I thought Lucas was gonna be bringing Jamie back. Is he alright? Something was really bugging him last night. I still can't figure out… was it me going to the reunion or something with Nathan or I dunno?"

"As far as I know he was fine. I wouldn't worry too much about it. You know he gets into those super broody moods now and then…"

"Yea, but this was different."

"How so?"

"Well it was like he had given up…you know, for the past 5 years, I swear, all I've heard is 'Brooke this, Brooke that.' Then he went to go meet with that editor of his, whatever her name is, Lindsey I think, and it was like everything changed. Now he's trying to shut me out and I don't know why. And all he's been doing is writing, cooped up in his room on his laptop all day. It's like he's possessed or something."

Karen just laughed at her last comment. "He's a writer Haley…how else is he going to make a living?"

"Yea, you've got a point, but you're telling me you haven't noticed anything weird about him lately?"

"Come on Haley, Lucas is my son and I love him, but even I know…there's always something weird about him. If there wasn't, that's when I would start to worry."

"I guess you're right.

…

Brooke woke up in her hotel room after a peaceful night's sleep, startled to find it was nearly a quarter to twelve already. The convenience of having privacy, a room all to herself for once, allowed her to sleep in. Back home, though, even if she could have, the ever-busy workaholic in her would have never tolerated such laziness. Getting behind in the day's tasks was like a sin. So a part of her felt a tad rebellious for doing so. In fact, she actually felt if it hadn't been for her cell phone ringing she may have officially slept the morning away; something she hadn't done in ages.

"Millie?" She answered, groggily.

"Brooke? Oh my god, were you sleeping? I'm so sorry, I just, I thought you'd be up. Isn't it like noon there? Wait do you want me to call you back in like an hour or something? It's really no big deal…"

Her favorite over analyzing, super sensitive, assistant slash best friend was having a meltdown. It was comforting to hear, but Brooke wouldn't dare make her suffer any longer.

"Relax Mills, take a deep breath." Brooke cooed. "I needed to wake up anyways. So how is the store?"

"It's great! Everything is all set for opening, Carley just arrived a few minutes ago…"

"And how long have you been there?" Brooke suspected that Millie had been at the store way before she had needed to be, but she appreciated the effort.

"Just a few hours" She promised, quickly changing subject. "Oh, and I stopped by your house with dinner last night…"

"Julian couldn't manage to get _one_ meal on the table without me there? Men. I mean I left the names of all the take out places we like and everything!"

"Yea, I know, well that part is sorta my fault. See I wanted to make sure Natalie had a home cooked meal while you were gone."

"Ha! Like she has one when I'm there? What a joke. You're too funny you know that?"

Millie just laughed awkwardly. "So, any scoop you wanna tell me?"

"Nah, not really. I'm meeting with an old friend tonight, though…so maybe after that."

"You're not meeting with that Lucas guy are you?" She asked, perking up a bit.

"No, thank god. Why?"

"Well, don't freak out okay…"

"You know I hate when you start sentences like that! What else am I gonna do but freak out? What is it?"

"I think he might have been at the Clothes Over Bro's opening…"

"What? How? Why would you think that?"

"He sorta signed in, maybe?"

"Millie!" She screeched. "How the hell did we miss that?"

"I dunno, exactly. But, it gets worse, or better, I don't know how you'll look at it, but…"

"You're rambling Mills!"

"Oh, sorry…anyways, he kinda wrote something in the book besides his name and address. Do you want me to read it?"

"Of course I want you to read it!"

"Alright. Here it goes: _'I watched you today… I am so proud of you, Brooke. I've always known you would change the world someday. There was never a doubt in my mind. And, I know what you must be thinking…I swear, I was going to come up to you and say all of this in person, but I chickened out. I guess I just wasn't ready to see you on the arm of some other guy. He seems nice and you seemed happy, which makes me happy. But, that doesn't mean I miss you, my pretty girl behind the red door, any less. Because missing you gets harder with each passing day. Every morning I wake up and I have this ... ache in my chest because I know you aren't going to be there; you may never be here next to me and that is my fault. I'm sorry for that; sorry I ever let you down, pushed you away, made you feel like you had to leave. But my biggest regret of all: letting you go, letting you walk out of my life, without fight. You once told me--there's nothing wrong with fairy tales; everyone ends up happily ever after in the end. I guess I just want to believe in it all again…music and art...fate and love, and I want to believe that I've made the right choices, that I'm still on the right path. But mostly, I just want to believe there's still time to fix some of the mistakes I've made. What I really want, what I really need…is hope. So, right now I'm going to go out there and become the best person, the best writer that I can be…just in case one of these days you wake up with that same ache in your heart. And whenever that day comes, if that day ever comes, know that I'll still be waiting for you, like I said I would all those years ago. Realize how much I was, am and always will be in love with you. And when you're ready to come home…find your way back to me, and we'll know that it's meant to be. Until then…congratulations, Brooke Davis. I wish you all the best._ _-LES_

By the time Millie had finished reading Lucas's words Brooke was beside herself, pacing the room, in a fury of emotions. Her assistant, on the other hand, was sighing uncontrollably to herself, practically falling in love with the man her boss had worked so hard to forget.

"Ugh! That…this is just so Lucas!" She mumbled to herself, loud enough for Millie to hear.

"What? Being like the most romantic man to walk the earth? What is wrong with you?" Millie huffed back, not understanding Brooke's discernment. "This guy seems totally in love with you…"

Brooke plopped herself down on the bed. "He has all these eloquent words and beautifully timed speeches. That's how he functions. So, of course, _you_ think he's this super romantic incredible guy, because he is! But that's just it, Millie. It's not really about me… it's this thing he does, this game of cat and mouse…it's the chase he loves! He can't keep doing this to me! I just, I can't…it's always the same."

"Brooke, I don't mean to impose my opinion on you, because I really don't know the whole story but, from where I stand, he's not chasing you…he's waiting for you. And, I don't know if you are just too scared or too stubborn to see that, or what. But, at some point you're gonna have to figure it all out."

"Yea, I know…"

…_**Leave me be, I don't want to argue**_

_**I'd just get confused and I'd come all undone**_

_**If I agree, well, it's just to appease you**_

_**Cause I don't remember what we're fighting for…**_

"Listen, you and Julian have been together now, what, almost 4 years? I mean, you know the guy loves you; he's proposed like a million times. And, every time, it never fails, you find some reason _not_ to go through with it!"

"But…"

"But, nothing!" Millie cut her off again. "You always have these perfectly plausible explanations for why you need to wait to set the date…at first it was the whole Natalie thing, then it was your mother, and then it was the store opening. One of these days you're gonna run out of excuses! Then what are you gonna do? Huh? You're wearing the ring he gave you, with a promise of _someday_, and you have absolutely no intention of seeing that through. And, don't even try to deny it, because you know it's true, we all know. So, what is it? What's _really_ holding you back? I mean, I know what I think it is but…what does your heart tell you?"

After a few moments of silence Millie excused herself from the conversation, leaving Brooke wallowing in her own thoughts.

For the longest time she had waited; hoping, believing that Lucas would wake up one day and realize what an idiot he had been and come running, begging her to come back to him. But, he never did, or so she thought. And now, finding out that he had actually done just that, the very thing she had been waiting for all along, she was even more scared and confused then before.

Millie was right. The last thing she wanted to do was look into her heart because she knew what it would tell her. A part of her did feel that same ache Lucas described; a part of her heart was empty and had been since the day she walked out of Tree Hill and away from him. That place in her heart belonged to Lucas and it always would. But, Julian, he loved her now and he dealt with her craziness and he didn't seem to mind that most of the time her heart wasn't in it one hundred percent. He had been the one by her side comforting her when Lucas hadn't been. He was the constant force in her life and Brooke was grateful to him for that. After all, it's been said that you only get one chance in life, and she and Lucas had two. The way she saw it, they'd blown them both.

…

Brooke decided to leave early enough from her hotel to run a few errands and stop by the park before meeting with Haley. It had been a long time since she had sat on that bench, too long. In fact, she could only vaguely remember the last time she had. Yet, sitting there again reminded her quickly of the peace she had once found in this very same spot.

…_**And I need just a little more silence,**_

_**And I just need a little more time**_

_**The courage to pull away**_

_**There will be hell to pay**_

_**The deeper you cut to the bone…**_

Being back in Tree Hill forced Brooke to come to terms with a lot of things she had been hiding from, mostly her long held feelings for Lucas. Back in high school it had all seemed so clear, as if it was destined to be that way. Now she was more confused than ever. There were so many uncertainties: would she ever be able to trust him again…trust their love? Was love enough? Were they really meant to be? When it all came down to it, she didn't know what to believe anymore.

…_**Cause I don't remember what we're fighting for…**_

"Brooke?" She heard a familiar voice call out to her.

_No, it couldn't be._ She thought, trying not to turn her head, though she knew exactly who was standing behind her. _Oh! I'm such an idiot! Why did I ever come back here?_

"Hi, Lucas." She responded coyly.

"Do you have a second?"

"Actually, I have to go meet Haley." She got up from the bench trying to get out of this uncomfortable situation she had found herself in.

"Wait…stop, please! Look at me…Brooke!"

He had caught up to her by then and was now standing directly beside her. His gaze was intense as usual, impenetrable. For a moment she hesitated and held his eyes to her own, lost in what could have been. There was only one thing Lucas knew would buy him time. It was risky and could backfire, which he knew, but he couldn't let her walk away from him again without acting. So, he grabbed her instinctively and pulled her close, placing his lips gently upon hers until he had lost all ability to censor himself and just gave in to the passion. She did the same only her reaction was the opposite. Feeling his lips on hers felt so natural and for a second it was enough to provide her amnesia of the past. But, then she snapped back into reality and pulled away from him.

"To think I had almost forgotten you're the guy who loves to rip the rug right out from under me just when I start to feel like I've gotten some sort of stable ground!" She yelled, turning away from him again, tearing up now, vulnerable as ever and frustrated with herself for allowing him to have that same intoxicating effect on her, after all these years. "This is wrong…I'm with someone now, and he's a good man, he loves me…" She explained, pointing to the diamond on her finger.

"Don't marry him, Brooke!" He pleaded with her. The sparkle in his eyes nearly gone. "I mean, am I crazy? Do you not feel what I have felt everyday since we've been apart? Because I've felt like there's a vital piece of me that's missing and that part is _you_. Look me in the eye and tell me you didn't feel something just now when we kissed."

"Of course I felt _something_ Luke! But that doesn't change anything…"

"Yes it does…that changes everything. I love you, Brooke…I always have and I always will. I don't know how else to say it…you and I should be together! Not you and this guy…whatever his name is!"

"Julian, his name's Julian." She corrected. "And it's too late…I wanted you to fight for me…I wanted you to fight for us, _then_! I mean you can't keep doing this to me!"

"Doing what?"

"_This,_ what you're doing now! It's like you have this way of saying these amazing things and making me believe them…stringing me along and then when it gets too tough you bail! It's always the same thing…I learned that one the hard way."

"If anyone bailed it was you…I wasn't the one who left, remember?"

"Yea you're right…I did walk out on Tree Hill, but you know what? You walked out on us way before that…"

That hit Lucas like a ton of bricks. Brooke was right. And that had been his biggest regret of all. He had been trying to make up for it ever since. He just didn't know how.

"Just, you have to find a way to give me one more chance…you just have to. Nobody's perfect. I've made mistakes and there isn't anyone who knows that more than you. But I've tried the whole sitting back and waiting for you thing and well that's just not me. I have to act…and I can't, no I won't, risk losing you again, forever."

Brooke wanted to believe him, she really did want to give him another chance, her heart did anyway. But, her mind was another story. It was like she was being thrown back into the same mess as before. The life she could have had with Lucas was screaming at her and seeing him there, knowing that this was how it had all turned out, was ripping her heart out all over again.

Lucas could sense that she needed more that just words, but at this point he didn't have anything else, so he continued, with the hope that someday he would. "I know you feel like I abandoned you and you don't trust what I say but if you let me I'll prove it to you…"

"Let me ask you a question. It's an important one so think about it, okay?" She made her way closer to him, as he nodded. "If two people love each other, really love each other but they just can never seem to get it together, you know what I mean. When do you get to that point of enough is enough?"

"Never." He responded with out hesitation. "Remember my best man speech at Keith and my ma's wedding? Remember what you told me you loved most about it?"

Brooke thought for a minute, of course she remembered. How could she forget?

"The part about taking chances and believing in the possibility even when life has given you every reason not to believe." She spoke his exact words, smiling at him, knowingly. "It was beautiful."

"Well, I had great inspiration." He grinned back at her insinuating his greatest muse was standing right in front of him.

"I really do have to go now." She told him, more sincerely this time, giving one last polite smile before walking away.

And that was when it all hit her. Ironic actually, why she hadn't thought of it before.

_That's what they'd been fighting for all along_. She thought, walking into Karen's Café, seeing Haley wave her over from the corner. _Remember tonight for it is the beginning of always… Yes, I know exactly where I'll start back up with the story…Keith & Karen's wedding. _

_

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******Lyrics used in this chapter are from "Time," by Sarah McLachlan.******_


	13. Soulmates

**All Those Years Ago**

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Disclaimer: **I own nothing. All characters belong to Mark Schwann and the CW.

**A/N: **Sorry the update took so long, but this was a rather complicated chapter for me to write given the lapse in time from the accident to now. Either way, it's wedding time! So, I hope you enjoy the love…especially BL love. Thank you so much for the reviews, those of you who left them! Keep em coming please. This is crunch time and I need to know how you're all feeling! Hugs…

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**Soulmates**

…_**There's a tone in the sound of your voice **_

_**My heart is listening to **_

_**And a message inside of your mind, I can relate to **_

_**The feeling inside of your soul, I am feeling **_

_**Maybe soulmates exist after all…**_

Springtime was approaching in Tree Hill and second chances were abounding. Buds were forming earlier than usual and the crisp late February mornings made way for rather warm afternoons. The barren trees of winter looked alive again, and the streams and waterways no longer gave off the dreaded chill one might expect for that time of year.

Yes, it seemed a lot had changed since the accident. And, yet, at the same time a lot had stayed the same. Like say basketball, for instance, which was for the most part the same. At least now after Lucas had been able to return it was. That made all the difference. Having Lucas back the Ravens had quickly made up for lost time, and after a few weeks they were back on top, where they belonged.

Nothing had changed between Keith and Karen. They were still so in love, yet so at ease, that it made nearly everyone around them painfully jealous and in awe at the same time. Even Lucas envied his mother and uncle; they seemed to have it all. Though, knowing everything those two had gone through, no one would have denied them that happiness. Fortunately for everyone's sake their wedding day had nearly arrived. Soon they would be living out their happily ever after as Mr. and Mrs. Keith Scott; a dream come true for both of them.

For Lucas, though, life was quite the opposite. So much had changed since the moment Rachel confessed Parker's true paternity. Also, in the wake of confusion, which began before Lucas had woken up after surgery, much had been revealed. With everyone having been crammed into the hospital that January weekend, emotions already on edge, had slipped, setting in motion a chain of events too outlandish to describe.

What important did come out of it all was bittersweet for Luke. He really wasn't the father. Cooper, the over night sensation, racecar driving playboy, turned all-American family man was. His stomach curled at the thought of how much that image reminded him of a certain Dan Scott. So, while a part of Luke felt instant relief to know that Parker would have a dad, something he never had, the other part was disappointed and maybe even a little scared because he would have no control over that experience. Regardless, it seemed that Cooper was buying into the whole "daddy" thing. So, maybe there was hope for the boy yet.

Then there was Nathan, heartbroken by Haley and still being harassed by his father. Clearly not much had changed there. So, for the time being, having the distraction of the game and the team was about the only thing holding him together. Since the accident he had spoken to Haley only once, briefly on the phone at the hospital following his discharge. Unfortunately, while he had appreciated her concern, there was still that tiny aspect of uncertainty, that lingering issue of she and Chris Kellar's relationship that had forced him to end the conversation abruptly.

From that moment on Nathan put it in his head that he would have to go at it alone. Not surprisingly, his rationale was faulty. It was inconceivable that he would think such absurdities, so far from accurate that it was almost laughable, but there was no convincing him on the matter. He had made his choice.

If there were ever anyone more hard headed than he, someone with the ability to make him see otherwise, it would have been Brooke. Yet for the first time, feeling enormous guilt for her part in this whole mess, the cheery one feigned a quiet surrender. In reality she had done so only to appease Nathan. Inside she wanted to scream and fight and beg him to reconsider pulling away. She knew all to well the consequences of shutting people out. That used to be her move. Actually, it still sort of was. And, it didn't matter how much progress both of them had made last semester; that instinct still remained, desperate to hide fresh wounds.

Adding to her disdain was the way Nathan's grey-blue eyes had turned cold again. Brooke could tell he believed, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he was alone, no matter if he was or not, and she could sense the presence of his old demons, apprehensions and guilt resurfacing.

Having feared the worst and knowing Lucas to be the valiant one that he was, she turned to their broody friend for help when all else had failed. Without hesitation Lucas had assumed responsibility and had been watching over Nate like a hawk ever since.

In the meantime Brooke had stayed true to her promise, dedicating the majority of her free time to honorable causes. Since she and Lucas had first separated the brunette had been fast away trying to "change the world." The accident had ironically given her the inspiration she previously lacked and her recent efforts had finally started to pay off. She was starting to feel whole again, able to stand on her own two feet.

On Karen's advice Brooke had spent the last few weeks searching for the girl she wanted to be, someone she could be proud of and, in less than 24 hours, she would be unveiling two masterpieces: her safe ride's program "DW not I" and Karen's fabulous wedding dress.

In a lot of ways she was finally embodying the beautiful, brilliant and brave persona Lucas had admired and foreseen in her months ago. It showed in the way she carried herself, no longer a victim to the ever-demanding world of popularity, and mostly by the way she now smiled.

Lucas noticed this transformation immediately. Something about seeing Brooke happy made Luke's heart melt; it gave him hope, in a way that seemed almost magical. Seeing her in that element made him fall in love with her all over again, and this time he was even more convinced of his feelings. Sure, they were just friends, for now, but each time they shared a smile or a simple touch it was as if the world moved them closer together.

Call it what you like, a lover's instinct, a cry for help, a favor for someone special, fate, destiny, whatever. Every possible road led back to the same conclusion: they needed each other.

When all the dust had settled there was only one thing the broody blonde was sure of. He had to prove to Brooke that his love for her was real; he had to win back her trust and her heart.

...

Karen was the easiest client, by far, if you'd even call her a client. The only thing she was concerned about was getting down the aisle and saying, "I do" to the man she loved. She could have cared less about how the dress looked.

Brooke, on the other hand, was not as easy going. With the wedding quickly approaching she had planned to sneak over to Karen's house after school that day to have the final fitting. As she stood in her bedroom, which doubled as a makeshift studio, the designer-to-be took one last look at her work, making sure every detail was perfect. Only when she was completely satisfied did she head over to Karen's.

While to humble to say it out loud, one could not deny that this gown was her greatest fashion achievement to date. It was more than beautiful; it was heavenly. Brooke had played off the bride-to-be's milky white skin and the wedding's coral and ocean blue palette. The outcome: an ivory tulle strapless embroidered gown that would take anyone's breath away. Tiny buds like baby's breath covered the bodice and cascaded down the skirt, adding a sweetly feminine touch to the already princess like feel. She knew, without question, Karen would look absolutely awe-inspiring in it.

Before long Brooke had make it to her destination. Wanting to surprise Karen she decided to let herself in. Quietly she had crept open the back door and preceded into the house, tip toeing around until she heard the clanking of a pot in the kitchen.

"Tada!" She announced, bursting into the room, holding the dress up for admiration.

Locking eyes with Lucas, who was equally taken off guard by her outburst, she smiled and shrugged embarrassedly.

"Crazy girl, what are you doing to my heart?" He asked her, smiling back, regaining his breath.

"Oh my god, I'm _so_ sorry. I thought you were, you know..." She moved her hands frantically trying to explain, stumbling as she realized how foolish she had been thinking she could just waltz around that house, carelessly going around scaring people with serious heart conditions half to death. "I thought you were Karen...I wanted to surprise her."

She then plopped herself onto the table and smiled a little wider, obviously in an attempt to gain redemption for her actions, which Lucas was quick to oblige.

"Don't worry, pretty girl. The heart's still beating." He assured her, moving to take a look at the dress. "Sure is beautiful. My mom will love it."

"Thanks. She'll look amazing." She sighed, daydreaming. "Oh, by the way, my safe ride's program, 'DW not I' is officially up and running. So do me a favor and pass along the word at the reception?" She paused for a moment, noticing his blank confused stare. "You know, drunk, bitter bridesmaids..."

Lucas kinked up his eyebrow as they both remembered who the bridesmaids were: Haley and the matron of honor, Susanne, an old friend from high school.

"Okay so maybe not the bridesmaids." She corrected. "Though I don't know about this Susanne lady. She could be a real alchy."

Lucas just laughed. "I don't know; romantic ceremony though…"

Brooke sighed at the thought. She had been helping Karen out with the details for the past month and wanted more than anything to be in attendance but considering it was such a small intimate affair, she hadn't wanted to impose.

Lucas continued, egging her on. "Followed by a big fancy party. Wow. It's gonna be incredible."

"Oh, I know." She groaned, unable to pretend any longer. "All the details: the flowers, the dresses of course." She grinned. "And the vows..." She sighed longingly.

"And the best man speech. Don't forget about that." He added, cockily.

"Of course. How could I forget about that?" She replied with a hint of sarcasm.

"I dunno, but it's simply unforgivable." He teased.

"Luke, you're killing me. You know I'm a sucker for weddings!"

"Aren't you going?" He asked confused.

"I wasn't invited." She admitted, sadly.

Lucas squinted his eyes in disbelief. He could have sworn he had seen his mom make an invitation for Brooke, but she clearly had not received it. He had a strong suspicion that Rachel had had something to do with its disappearance or misdirection. Though before he could say anything on the matter Brooke proposed an option he couldn't refuse.

"Any chance the best man needs a date?" She asked, ever so playfully. It tore at Lucas's heart. "Please, please, please…I wanna go _so _bad!"

Lucas was enjoying this entirely too much and then she said those two dreaded words.

"In a _just friends_ sorta way of course…"

Lucas looked disappointed, but not for the reasons Brooke assumed.

"I mean we said we'd try to be friends, right? And friends do stuff together as friends…this way you'll have someone to pal around with." She explained.

"Yeah, uh okay."

"Yay!"

Lucas smiled and chuckled to himself. "It's a date then. Well, sorta-kinda, not really…"

"Yea, whatever, I'm in." She told him wiping away any awkwardness between them. "Just pick me up early okay…I don't want to miss a thing."

"Sure."

Then they shared a smile, followed by one of those moments when the world just seemed to stand still and disappear around them. They both felt it, though they were both also fighting it unnecessarily for the other's sake.

…_**There's an energy inside your smile that shines upon me **_

_**And the positive sides of your dreams, I am dreaming **_

_**Simple understanding is what I need, hey **_

_**Maybe soulmates exist after all… **_

Before either managed to breech that unspoken barrier, Karen had walked in, breaking them out from their bliss.

"There you are Karen!" Brooke gasped, thankful for the diversion.

She then scurried over to the dress, which was lying over the table, and began ushering the soon-to-be bride out of the room. The cheery one turned back for only one reason: to remind Lucas not to be late tomorrow.

…

Brooke was so full of excitement that she could barely sleep through the night. Not only was she getting the opportunity to attend what was expected to be the most romantic wedding ever, she was going with Lucas. Better yet, her mother had called the night before and confirmed that any money troubles they had been experiencing would soon be an issue of the past. Brooke's father was set to land a very prestigious job with a law firm in California. To celebrate, the bubbly brunette decided to treated herself to a pre-wedding shopping spree. After all, she figured a fashionista like herself had to look fabulous. Especially when everyone around her, whom she had personally styled for the event, undoubtedly would.

At Neiman Marcus she had found herself the most amazing pale yellow and nude Herve Leger bandage dress, which she decided she would pair with a vintage, multi-colored stone, 24-karet gold necklace and ring. For earrings she picked out a pair of Chanel gold and pearl studs and threw in the matching mesh bracelet watch. She planned to top the ensemble off with modest nude heels to elongate her legs and a Celestina fan shaped shell clutch that coincided with the wedding's seaside theme.

When she got back home and laid out all the pieces she had to admit it was a bit overboard. The clutch alone was nearly $1,500 and the dress wasn't far off. The jewelry definitely had not been cheap, Chanel never was, but all together it looked incredible. Plus, the necklace and ring were family heirlooms that she had stashed away for safekeeping before her parents had moved. Those hadn't cost her a penny. So she told herself that it all balanced out.

_So maybe a bit overboard was an understatement,_ she thought to herself, as she put the dress on. _But, damn I look good in this thing. No wonder the stars swear by this guy. Mr. Leger you are a genius, a god, an expensive one but still a freakin genius-god nonetheless. Thank you, thank you…I look hot again!_

Delighted with the outcome of her attire Brooke glided to the door. She could hear Luke's car out front and didn't want to keep him waiting after having made such a fuss yesterday about his promptness.

By then Lucas had made it half way up to her door. As she stepped out, walking towards him, her chestnut waves of hair glistened in the sunlight. Her beauty was more evident then ever. This he could not deny.

"You know you look amazing right?" He managed to say as he blatantly checked her out. "I mean, you look expensive too…wait, that didn't sound right." He tripped over his own words something that only she had the power to make him do. "You look amazing, lets just leave it at that."

"Thanks." She replied, giggling at how uncomfortable he seemed.

A part of her was slightly embarrassed to admit how good it made her feel to know she still had that effect on him. He had always had that effect on her.

"Besides, I am basically a rich girl again…" She broke in, trying to change the subject. "So, yea today is pretty much gonna be the best day ever." She promised.

Smiling at her ridiculous rationale that only she could have come up with Lucas grabbed her by the waist. "Shall we get going? We wouldn't want to miss anything right?"

"Uh huh." She perked up at the reminder, nodding eagerly as she followed his lead to the car.

A couple of minutes later they were at the pier, where the ceremony was to be held. At first sight Brooke was astonished by its simplistic elegance and pure romanticism. She had seen pictures of what the scene was supposed to look like but nothing compared to experiencing and seeing it first hand. Everything was exquisite as far as she could tell and coming from Brooke that meant a lot.

One entire side of the pier, including the area that had been transformed over night into the seating, aisle and alter, was designated for the nuptials. It was as though Tree Hill's seaside was made just for them; at least for that day it was.

As Brooke made her way closer she was overcome with glee. Having taken in all the smaller details, the brunette was now acting more like a little kid in a candy store than a 17 year old at a wedding. From the calligraphied welcome sign, hanging on an adjacent tree, to the perfectly positioned white chairs that encased the free standing alter, looking directly onto the ocean; each element was more impressive than the next. Every seat had a coral bow and a starfish hanging from the end closest to the center and the aisle was lined with ivory fabric and scattered with rose petals.

"Oh, it's…I don't even know what to say it is so beautiful! Thank you for bringing me, Luke." She sighed, taking a spot next to her broody.

"You're welcome." He gazed into her eyes, genuinely. "This is how it should be. I don't know why you didn't get the invite but trust me my mom and Keith wanted you here."

"Really? That means a lot."

"Yea…anytime." He shot her that famous grin of his. "So how are things in your life? Any male suitors you need to tell me about…_friend_?"

She laughed, knowing good and well where he was going with that one. "Not really. Actually, things have been great. So great that lately, I've just sorta found myself feeling…" She paused trying to find the right word. "Independent, I guess, ironically enough. I don't even know if I _want_ a boyfriend right now."

A little defeated Lucas looked down for a minute before responding. "Yea, I know what you mean. I guess we're both…finding our way, a new way…for ourselves, huh?"

"I guess so." She whispered, hesitantly, as they both smiled understandingly at one another.

This whole "just friends" thing that they were trying to pull off was harder than they had imagined. See, it is one thing to control what you say. Making something appear truthful, however false, is easy. It is another entirely different and difficult task to repress what is felt, what is absolute. When those feelings are as strong as in this case with Brooke and Lucas, doing so was nearly impossible.

"You wanna get a drink?" Lucas asked, pulling Brooke out of her daze.

"Yea, good idea." She replied, moving along at his side. "So, where's Haley?"

"Probably in with my mom getting ready. Doing bridesmaid things. They've got a room over there," he pointed.

"Ah, yes…and am I keeping you from doing best man stuff?" She took a drink off the table and kept walking, using her prying eyes to decipher his answer.

"Maybe…" He responded coyly.

Inside the clubhouse, without the warmth of the sun beating down on them, the temperature was already cold, but the air conditioning too was on and blasting, which made it that much worse. Brooke was shivering. At that point she cursed herself for not bringing a jacket along. It might have ruined the look she was going for but at least she wouldn't have been standing there, teeth chattering, looking like an idiot and miserable, like she was now.

"You cold?" He asked.

"It's freezing in here." She remarked, still holding her arms, rubbing them to keep warm.

"Yeah, sorry about that." He chuckled to himself. "It's probably by design; Keith's kind of a sweater, especially when he's nervous."

Brooke looked a tad mortified by that information, but just shrugged. "T-M-I?" She scoffed.

Lucas nodded as he took off his own jacket and set it on her shoulders. "There, all better. Now, I should probably go see Keith, you know, get back to those best man duties you've been keeping me from." He joked. "You gonna be okay?"

"Well, could your _ego_ take it if I didn't put up a little fight?" She cocked her head, sweetly, playing along with the game.

Lucas shook his head. "Probably not." He smirked.

"Well then in that case." She started overdramatically, channeling her best 1940s damsel in distress. "Please you must stay, I don't know what I'll do with out you. I will miss you terribly…"

"Yeah, yeah. I get it. You really don't need me, huh? Ms. Independent."

"Nope, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy your company, so hurry back _pal_!"

Lucas promised not to keep her waiting too long and then sped off in the direction of where Keith was getting ready. Brooke sat contently, until she stuck her hands in the pockets of his jacket to find something rustling around beneath her fingers. The Nancy Drew in her forced the brunette to pull out the mysterious folded up piece of paper. Curiously, she opened it up and examined the contents.

_Oh! His best man speech._ She thought. _This is way to good to pass up…_

…

Lucas made his way into the groom's dressing room, finding Keith standing by himself, with a Champaign class in one hand and what looked to be his vows in the other.

"Old habits die hard, huh?" He picked fun at his uncle's drinking habits.

"It's just tonic, smart ass." Keith turned to face his nephew and best man, laughing.

"Sure."

"Well, it's just so damn hot in here!" he complained, tugging at his tie, trying to loosen it up to ease the pressure.

"You'll be fine. You always know the right thing to say. I'm pretty sure _that _talent won't abandon you at the alter."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. But, uh, hey, listen, I don't-I don't wanna get mushy but, um, I just wanna say thanks."

"For what?"

"Just… for being you, and for being my best man. You really are the best, you know?" Keith paused and they shared a pseudo-father-son moment; the closest Luke would have ever known. "And I'm real proud of the man you're turning out to be…"

Lucas smiled. "Well, who do you think I learned it from?" He questioned, gesturing at his uncle.

"I know where you got that gift of bull-shit," he stated, partially rolling his eyes. "But I appreciate the support anyways."

Keith then pulled Lucas into a proud man hug and released him from his duties until the ceremony.

…

Back by the pier Brooke was reapplying her eye make-up as she sniffled to herself. From the shadow that was approaching she knew Lucas was walking up to her and desperately tried to escape his watchful eye.

"Don't look at me." She begged pitifully, sniffling some more.

Of course Lucas would never have listened and sat down next to her, closing in the gap between them. "Have you been crying?" He asked, concerned.

"Maybe tearing up a little." She took a deep breath and let it out. "I did a bad thing…I read your speech." She turned to meet his gaze, looking guilty as ever.

"Brooke!" He cried out.

The mischievous brunette just let out a smile as she handed him back the jacket, speech included. "Don't leave your journal where I can find that, either…" She warned, as he broke into a softer, more understanding, look.

"'Remember tonight for it is the beginning of always'." She recited his words by memory from the beginning.

"Dante, yes…he's one of the greats." He told her. "We read him last semester, remember?"

"Ah yes, Dante, of course." She replied, sarcastically trying to cover up her embarrassment. "I guess I should start to pay more attention in English."

"Eh, high school's almost done. Besides, the rest is me."

Brooke sat in awe, remembering his words and how inspiring they had been; how true and honest and simply beautiful.

"The part about taking chances and believing in the possibility, even when life has given you every reason not to believe…" She sighed, looking up at him with wide vulnerable eyes.

"See, that's what's so great about weddings; you know, two people come together… and even if it's just for one night, they make us believe again."

"Oh my gosh, stop it." She pleaded mercilessly. "I don't have anymore tissues."

…_**I realized early on, good and bad in life, have a meaning **_

_**And I tried, oh to be strong, until I die; I'll still be learning **_

_**But your spirit and your vibe, touched me deeply down inside **_

_**I was wrong; you were there all along… **_

Lucas then went into his pocket and pulled out the oversized handkerchief that had come compliments of the rented tuxedo.

"Here." He said, shaking it out and presenting it to her.

"I just hope at my wedding, someone says something that nice about me." She admitted, taking the kerchief and wiping away the last of her tears.

"I think you can count on that."

With that he grabbed her close by the waist and gave her a reassuring squeeze. Feeling comfortable in his embrace Brooke let her guard down for the moment and rested her head on his shoulder.

…

It is important to realize that those who know true love agree; it is more than just two persons joining in the bonds of marriage. In its greatest form, it's the uniting of two souls already attuned to one another. See, when such an absolute bond already exists between man and woman, as it was so apparently the case with Keith and Karen, it is expected that an outer acknowledgment be made.

So, with the backdrop of the ocean's waves crashing down upon them, Karen and Keith prepared to take that final step in their relationship. Their bodies tilted in the slightest way, giving off the illusion that they were already one entity. Their commitment to each other was undeniable.

While the wedding procession continued, Brooke sat in her seat enamored by the pure essence and devotion displayed around her. As has been expected Karen looked simply divine in her dress, picture perfect. Her presence was jaw dropping, simply angelic; there wasn't a single person who would have disagreed. In fact, if it hadn't been for the formality of the ceremony Karen would have probably stopped and engulfed Brooke in thoughtful praise. Instead, however, when the blushing bride had walked down the aisle, on Whitey's arm, she had made a special point to mouth a quick but grateful thank you in the budding designer's direction.

Karen was finally getting her dream come true, and there wasn't anyone, in Brooke's opinion, more deserving of that happy ending. Her expression of gratitude, however small, was more than enough to please Brooke. She felt honored just to have been able to share in this joyous occasion. She beamed at the thought; someone she regarded so highly, the woman she considered a second mother, had fully entrusted her with the makings of the most important dress of her life. It was an honor, which until that point she had not fully accepted.

Making his way up to the alter the priest turned to face the eager couple and their guests. Raising up his hands to rejoice in the open hearts surrounding him, he began.

"Dearly beloved, today we are gathered here, among God – and in the face of this company – to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony. In coming here, we bring wishes of happiness and our fondest hopes for Keith Alan Scott and Karen Roe, and we assure them that our hearts are in tune with theirs." He proclaimed, standing between the two lovers. "These moments are meaningful to us all. For this relationship stands for love, loyalty, honesty and trust, but most of all for _friendship_." He paused, looking out into the ocean for a second, and then focusing back on the listeners sitting before him. "May we all be changed by what is said and witnessed here; as their separate lives and journeys become one, may each of us be reminded of our own wants, our own desires and our own journeys."

For a moment Brooke became lost in her inner thoughts of long-standing desire for love and true happiness. It always seemed to come down to one boy, one piece of her heart that longed for him, and the other pieces that never ceased to remain permanently fixated together with his. It was as if the pieces of their hearts belonged together, as one. Perhaps, in part they were already united. Though, in whole they were not, because their fears stood lingering before them, waging a silent war within them both.

She caught herself looking at Lucas, while still in thought. His eyes so clear and blue that they matched that of the sea. Brooke held her gaze on him as the officiant continued.

"It's a mystery how we fall in love; who we fall in love with, why we fall in love…but we do. Before Keith and Karen knew love, they were friends, and it was from this seed of friendship that their destiny together emerged." He smiled at the two standing before him.

Lucas was now staring right back into Brooke's eyes, as if he could feel her own wants and desires and shared them too. Above all it seemed he shared her fears.

"Do not think that you can direct the course of love – for love, if it deems you worthy, shall find and direct you." The minister claimed, confidently, moving towards the happy couple.

"At this time I would like to ask the bride and groom to join hands and exchange the vows which they have prepared for one another."

Without hesitation Keith took the lead. Pulling out the crumpled sheet of paper he had written his vows upon he grasped the hand of the woman he loved so dearly and addressed her.

"Karen, you once told me that you were afraid of growing old. You told me then that to grow old means to be alone, and it frightens you. But I want you to grow old; I want you to grow old with me. You do not have to fear being alone, because I will always be with you. Grow old with me, Karen Roe. I promise to love you faithfully, to care for you and cherish you, provide you with support and everything that you need. I swear to respect and honor you, no matter what life may bring to us. All my days left to me, I vow to spend them loving you."

Karen smiled in admiration as she placed her free hand on Keith's face, cupping it gently then releasing it back to its familiar home, inside of his. A moment later she followed his declaration with her own.

"Keith, many people spend their lives searching for their soulmate, their one true love. Some people are lucky to find the person they can truly call the better half of themselves, while others spend the rest of their lives searching and never finding. I am happy to count myself among the lucky ones, because I certainly found you. I love you for making me good, happy and whole; without a word, without a gesture, without a doubt. Just by being yourself. It is such a simple thing...but no one else in the world can do it: only _you_. This day, before our family and friends, with joy in my heart, I pledge myself to you. I promise to love you and to cherish our moments together, now and forever."

By then there wasn't a dry eye among them, including Keith, whom until that point hadn't so much as teared in public. Brooke was choking back a multitude of emotions, as was Haley and several other ladies.

Lucas moved forward with the rings, handing them to the minister, managing to give Brooke a comforting smile on his way back to Keith's side.

"The wedding ring is a symbol of eternity." The holy man explained, moving back beside the couple. "It is an outward sign of an inward and spiritual bond which unites two hearts in endless love." He ushered them forward. "Now as a token of your love and of your deep desire to be forever united in heart and soul, you may each place a ring on the finger of your other half."

Keith and Karen both grabbed their respective rings and turned toward each other again.

"This ring signifies the perfection of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be." Keith promised as he placed the ring on Karen's hand.

"This ring has no end or beginning, it signifies the continuation of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be." Karen returned the honor, slipping the other ring onto him.

"With these rings I thee wed." They clasped hands and said in unison.

"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

In the midst of celebratory cheers the new Mr. & Mrs. Keith Scott passionately sealed their fate. As they walked off into the sunset, hand in hand, their coming together brought back a certain feeling of hope and a belief in love that had been missing for too long.

…

The evening air had begun to fall upon them as Brooke and the other guests made their way to the reception yacht. In the interim of the ceremony and the after-party, tangy blood-orange signature cocktails and seafood hors d'oeuvres had been served on the ship. The display was magnificent on the inside deck. Two long, ivory and coral lined tables flanked a wooden dance floor that was embossed with K & K. Front and center was a small table just for the bride and groom.

Brooke picked up her place card, which was tied to a glass container, intended to be used at the end of the night to send a message in a bottle to the happy couple. She slowly made her way toward her seat, taking in all the intricate fine points along the way.

Vases of light blue Hydrangeas, evenly placed in the center of the table, were decorated with ribbon and a single sand dollar on each. In the corner she could see the delicate blue washes of a fondant-covered cake. Upon a closer look she noticed clusters of tiny white flowers that matched the centerpieces adorning the edges.

Soon after she found her seat and sat down Lucas came to her side. By then Keith and Karen and the remainder of the wedding party had arrived to join their guests. Not long after that Lucas excused himself to stand beside his mother and now father. He cleared his throat, gaining everyone's attention.

"You all know I am not a man of few words," he began, making fun of himself. "But, when it comes to these two, I don't think any words would quite do them justice in describing the love they feel for each other. Still, being the best man, my mother wouldn't have it any other way, so here it goes: 'Remember tonight, for it is the beginning of always.' A promise. Like a reward for persisting through life so long alone. A belief in each other and the possibility of love. A decision to ignore, simply rise above the pain of the past. A covenant, which at once binds two souls and yet severs prior ties. A celebration of the chance taken and the challenge that lies ahead. For two will always be stronger than one, like a team braced against the tempest civil world. And love will always be the guiding force in our lives. For tonight is mere formality. Only an announcement to the world of feelings long held; promises made long ago, in the sacred spaces of their hearts." He paused for a moment looking between the newlyweds, and raising his glass in a toast. "Congratulations…"

With that everyone took a sip of their Champaign and proceeded to clank their glasses until the happy couple faked surrender and kissed. Haley moved toward the dance floor microphone in hand, along with Chris who was there to perform with her. They began to dedicate their first song, as the bride and groom joined the entertainers for their first dance as man and wife.

…_**Ooh, the feel of your hand when you touch is electricity **_

_**You make me feel good, you make me dizzy **_

_**Love that's demanding, is what I need, hey **_

_**Maybe soulmates exist after all… **_

"Dancin' where the stars go blue. Dancin' where the evening fell. Dancin' in my wooden shoes…in a wedding gown." Haley sang.

"Dancin' out on 7th street. Dancin' through the underground. Dancin' little marionette. Are you happy now?" Chris cut in with his verse.

The singers moved closer, and in unison continued. "Where do you go when you're lonely? Where do you go when you're blue? Where do you go when you're lonely?

I'll follow you; when the stars go blue. When the stars go blue…"

At that point Keith and Karen invited everyone to join them.

Brooke and Lucas shared an anxious look. "Dance with me?" She asked him shyly.

Lucas stood immediately, answering the question non-verbally, simply holding out his hand to her and pulling her near. As they embarked on the dance floor both could sense the other's heart racing. Being so close, every inch of their bodies pressed together, it was as if a current ran between them. Physically it felt so right to be in that position, yet at the same time it was clear that emotionally there was still road to be covered.

Brooke laid her head on his chest and sighed. The calm that came over her when she was in his arms was intoxicating. He returned the favor, resting his chin onto her and breathing in their connection as the song came to an end.

Outside the confines of the ship the sounds of two angry men could be heard. Neither Brooke nor Lucas wanted to pull away from the other to see what the disturbance was but the familiar voices of Dan and Nathan Scott forced them to do otherwise.

"True love!" Nathan scoffed. "That's a good one." He picked up the bottle of Jamison whiskey he'd been drinking.

"What the hell are you doing?" Dan shouted at his belligerent son. "You're in public for god's sake!"

By then the entire party had moved to the edge of the boat and was watching the theatrics below them. Deb stood between the two men trying unsuccessfully to calm them down.

"Nathan, it's okay, let us help you…" She begged, moving closer.

"Do what?"

"Be happy again."

"Oh, please, mom." He laughed. "You're one to talk. You gonna give me some of your pills? I mean you guys don't know how to be happy. That is if you aren't ruining somebody else's life." He accused, pointing to his father. "You're both freaking hypocrites!"

"Is this about that classless ex-girlfriend of yours?" He asked, un-amused. "What was her name? Haley. Yea. The one that left your sorry ass for that guy on her music tour? I'm starting to see why…" Dan sneered.

"Screw you. Go back to making your wife miserable, you sick son of a bitch!"

Enraged Dan attempted to constrain his son by force, but even in the drunken stupor that Nathan was in his agility proved too much for the old man. Luckily, before things had gotten any further out of hand Lucas and Brooke had showed up and somehow during the scuffle Lucas had managed to get in the middle and break things up.

Upstairs Haley fought with herself as to whether or not she should go down to talk with him. Their last conversation hadn't been very pleasant, but she could see that he was in pain and she knew her absence was partly, if not completely, to blame.

Sensing Haley's inner struggle Chris came to her side offering up the ever so gentle poor advice that he was famous for. Haley, this is our shot; nothing else matters. Don't let some guy ruin it."

"Nathan matters! He's not just _some_ guy."

"Then what are you _still_ doing here? Listen, you made a decision. Don't blink now!"

…

"What the hell are you doing man?" Lucas asked, as he walked with Nathan, past his parents and away from the group, supporting him so that he wouldn't fall.

"It's all so messed up. I mean she said she was with Chris on nation TV, Luke." He struggled to say.

"I don't believe that." Lucas replied firmly.

"Neither did I, saw it with my own eyes though…ask her." He demanded, She's here with him I bet, isn't she…huh?" Seeing the evidence in his brother's guilty eyes he got all the answer he needed. "Figures."

"It's not like that Nate. Don't you think she'd tell me if it was? I'm her best friend." He argued. "Have you even talked to her?"

"What does it matter? It's over…"

"Only if you say it is."

"I'm hurtin, bad."

"I know. It's gonna be okay." He claimed, uncomfortably patting his troubled brother's back as reinforcement.

"No, I mean, I think I'm gonna puke." He scrunched up his face in pain, falling to the curb as he vomited uncontrollably.

Lucas just turned away disgusted, looking for Brooke, who was by then standing on the other side of the street next to a taxi that read "DW not I -- SPONSORED BY TREE HILL HIGH SCHOOL."

"DW not I, at your service." She spoke in her most professional voice, trailing off at the end into a small fit of laughter.

It was pretty fitting, having Nathan get so wasted on the night her safe driver's program had started up. Great publicity if nothing else, she figured. To think she was worried about the bridesmaids when really she should have been thinking: whom the bridesmaids would make drunk and bitter.

At the same time, Lucas shoved Nathan into the vehicle, shut the door, and handed the driver a wad of cash. "Just make sure he gets home alright, please." He ordered.

"Sure, thing." The student driver promised, before driving off.

The two sighed in disbelief, turned around to the pier and headed back to the party. At some point along the way Lucas had wrapped his hand around hers, and this time she didn't protest.

…

Inside the party Brooke found a spot next to Lucas's friend Mouth. He was definitely a dork, but there was something about him that Brooke had always admired and enjoyed: his honesty. He didn't pretend to be something he wasn't. He was content with his place in high school politics and more than anything he was just a genuinely nice guy.

She inched closer to him, trying to start conversation, knowing he was beyond shy around the ladies.

"Hey," she whispered. "Haven't seen you around in a while. How you been?"

"Eh, still hangin." He replied with a smile. "How bout you? Where've you been? The guys miss ya at the River Court."

"Yea, um. Just been busy I guess." She lied, shifting her focus to Lucas, who was dancing with his mother across the room.

Noticing the object of Brooke's attention Mouth did his best to intervene. "Listen, Brooke, I don't know what's going on with you and Lucas, but he's a really good guy. I've never really been good at sports. I mean, I'm little, ya know, but when I decided I wanted to be a sports announcer, Lucas introduced me to the guys at the River Court, and he made me feel like I belonged. He has a good heart, and as far as I can tell, you do, too. I'd be surprised if you two couldn't work things out.

…_**You were there baby all along **_

_**I believe, I believe…**_

"Thanks, Mouth." She dipped down to kiss him on the cheek. "You know, I haven't forgotten about finding you a sexy lady. I just haven't found one worthy enough yet." She winked at him before turning to walk away.

"Dance with me?" Lucas asked, having snuck up beside her without being noticed.

"Why I'd love to." She responded, breathlessly, in shock.

A huge smile formed on her face as he led the way. "Maybe I'm Amazed," by Jem, played in the background as they stepped onto the floor.

_Baby I'm amazed at the way you love me all the time. Maybe I'm afraid of the way I love you. Baby I'm amazed at the way you pulled me out of time; hung me on a line. Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you…_

…

Lucas walked along the pier, reminiscing over the night's events. _Richard Bach once said,_ he thought to himself. "_The worst lies are the ones we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it…"_

Brooke sat in her car wondering to herself. She held the wedding program in her hand, it read:

"_A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we're pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person."_

Was that person for her Lucas? Was she able to risk being hurt again? Could she get over his mistakes and he over hers? It seemed so, but then again love makes you feel like you can do anything, until it comes crashing back down upon you.

They both remembered the pastor's words from earlier: _"Do not think that you can direct the course of love – for love, if it deems you worthy, shall find and direct you."_

Among the stars that night they both made a decision to let things work their way out in time.

_If it is meant to be…it will be._

_

* * *

***** Lyrics used in this chapter are from "Soulmates," by Desree*****_

A/N: Again, hope you enjoyed the BL. We're getting closer to full on Brucas couple time so don't forget to review. Put the pressure on me…I work much faster with some fire under my Thanks again.


	14. Author's Note

Dear loyal fans,

I just wanted to let you know that I am having hip surgery tomorrow, so my next update may be a bit delayed. I don't anticipate too long before I am up and at it again, but just in case I wanted you all to be aware that the hiatus would occur.

However, reviews have been on the rise (thank you…thank you!) so I am trying my best to stay true to my promise. I think writing while in hip brace should get some points in that

In return for your understanding I wanted to point out that I have some new visuals for this story, which I created on my account at polyvore. com. My creations are listed under the name--T. Rece, if you are interested in checking them out. Some of the pictures contain spoilers, but nothing out of the ordinary from what I've promised, i.e. BL & NH happy endings.

So if you want to check that out, which I recommend. Visit polyvore. Either search my account name or add: /cgi/profile?id=873463 at the end of the site's home page address. If you have trouble PM me.

Also, to keep you interested, here are a few spoilers from the next chapters:

Brooke's designs are accepted to Rogue Vogue.

Her departure causes Lucas to cross the "just friends" barrier that they have been tip toeing around.

Brooke travels to NYC; she visits with Haley…2 unlikely visitors show them the time of their life.

Rachel's cabin, state championship game, Prom night are all to come…with a twist.

The remaining flashbacks will be full of rainy nights and embarrassing speeches, impulsive actions and secret pregnancies, foolish greed and tragedy, fear and abandonment. All the makings of good teen angst drama. When the story returns to present time the secrets that had been holding them in place for so long will have been revealed and our favorite characters will have to do some soul searching as fate and destiny lead the way. Here are some present time spoilers:

Lucas's novels, specifically The Comet, play a major role.

Brooke and Haley will have to make a very important, life-altering decision.

Haley conquers her guilt of picking music over Nathan.

Brooke moves back to Tree Hill.

Julian is a music producer, not movie producer.

Thank you everyone that has continued to follow and review this story. I hope it stays up to your expectations! Hugs, Rece.


	15. The Fear You Won't Fall

**All Those Years Ago**

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Disclaimer:** I own nothing. All characters belong to Mark Schwann and the CW.

**A/N:** Here it is, finally, I know. It was too long! First of all, getting back to writing was harder than I expected. I wasn't able to sit in front of a computer for what seemed like forever and the laptop hurt like hell on top of my hip. Secondly, the site wouldn't let me sign on when I was ready, which drove me crazy, btw. So, apologies all around for the wait. But, I'm back now, so that means no more extended hiatus. I also wanted to thank everyone that sent me get-well wishes. You are all too kind. I hope this chapter satisfies you guys. Keep reading and reviewing. Let me know what you're think, want, etc. You guys are like my silent partner/boss in this. So, flex your muscle! Thanks again!

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_**The Fear You Won't Fall**_

_**…Diggin a hole and the walls are caving in behind me  
Airs gettin thin but I'm trying  
I'm breathing in,  
come find me…**_

Aside from Nathan's drunken outburst, Keith and Karen's wedding had come and gone as beautifully and poetically as one could have only imagined. The following morning their closest friends and family had gathered together at the pier to officially send the couple off on their long awaited honeymoon. The sight of the two lovers waving goodbye, holding one another so genuinely in embrace, was forever engrained in those who witnessed the joyous event. In the hours after the newlyweds had sailed off a sense of ease swept over the town, and for exactly one day Tree Hill was peaceful.

That kind of non-climactic presence would have normally signaled the welcome of good things. However, given the town's reputation for unrest, this calm seemed uncharacteristically serene. In other words: too good to be true.

And, for many, trying to ignore that fact was hopeless. Not even a full 24 hours had passed before Brooke fell victim to worrisome thoughts. Usually she wouldn't have assumed the worst, but this time she couldn't fight the pessimistic tendencies. Everything seemed to cause her to become concerned and anxious for what was to become of their momentary oasis.

That morning, as she closed her locker, she noticed Nathan out of the corner of her eye. He hadn't stopped by her as he normally did, which was odd. Instead he just kept on walking like a robot-zombie. Not one to be left in the dark Brooke swiftly followed suit and caught up to him.

"So…DW not I wasn't such a bad idea after all eh?" Brooke asked, nudging Nathan's shoulder as they walked into English class together.

The recovering drunk just rolled his eyes. "Guess not." He scoffed.

Even though it had only been a little over a day, Brooke swore she noticed a change in Nathan's behavior. It seemed as if his passion had escaped him. His eyes remained cold and while they weren't directed towards her necessarily, they were definitely more withdrawn. What worried her the most was that he appeared content with that fact; a far cry from his previous antics.

"I heard Haley called you?" She pressed on further, despite the feeling in her gut that she might regret it later.

Nathan glared at her. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Is she coming home?"

"No." He barked; looking even more annoyed when Lucas sat down next to them, able to overhear their conversation.

"But, why?" She wondered out loud, cursing herself for being so careless once she saw Nathan's furious stare.

"Just forget about it, okay. I told her not to come!" He shouted, practically gaining everyone in the rooms attention, including their teacher, who was about to begin.

Brooke was stunned but she knew better than to argue. Instead she turned to meet Lucas's gaze with big apprehensive eyes. The broody blonde returned her feelings.

"There are two tragedy's in life…" Their teacher professed, pulling the action to the front of the room. "One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it."

Wow, I actually know that one! Brooke thought, smiling slightly to herself. George Bernard Shaw.

"For your midterm assignment I'd like you to write an essay on the meaning of Shaw's quote. It's due next time we meet…"

Immediately after hearing those words Brooke turned to watch Lucas and Nate's reactions. Not surprisingly both had instinctively looked in the direction of Haley's empty seat. In that moment, though, it was Luke who was visibly hurt by her absence. He seemed to need her comfort more.

"You okay?" She asked.

It was hard for Lucas to admit that not having Haley around meant as much as it did. For the longest time it had just been the two of them and now, without her, it just seemed wrong.

"Yea, I just always thought she'd be here to finish out with me, with us. You know?" Lucas tried to explain.

**_…It hasn't felt like this before,  
It hasn't felt like home, before you…_**

The cheery one smiled empathetically, knowing his pain all too well. She remembered how lost she had felt at the beginning of the school year, not having Peyton around. Looking back, Nathan had turned out to be far more reliable than she had expected, and since then they had built a friendship she wouldn't trade for the world. But Lucas, he had truly saved her, and she hoped that this time around it would be her who did the rescuing. So, reassuringly she gently placed her hand over his.

"Haley's really not coming back after all is she?" She choked out, trying desperately to convince herself otherwise.

"It sure looks that way." He responded, defeated.

Up until that point Brooke had honestly thought it would have only be a matter of time before Haley came home and everything went back to being normal. Yet, considering neither had come to be true she was beginning to lose hope all together.

Was it even possible to go back to normal? She thought. Does normal still exist?

"Hey, you wanna go with me after school to see Haley and give her the midterm?" Lucas asked, shifting in his seat uncomfortably.

Kinking up an eyebrow Brooke replied. "Sure, but I thought she left?"

"She did, but they're in Charlotte for the night. It's only a couple hours away."

"Um." She retorted hesitantly. "I know this must sound odd coming from me but what about school, the midterm?"

"I'll bring my laptop. Whoever sits shotgun can do the typing. Deal?" He proposed, flashing his undeniable smile along with it, breaking down her resistance.

"Okay." She overemphasized. "If you must have me go with you I will." She laughed.

"Great. Then it's settled. Meet me by the gym after last period. We'll want to get on the road right away."

For the remainder of the class period the three friends were too busy tending to their own devices to find conversation, and the time quickly passed.

…

It was always better to discuss one's short-cummings on a full stomach. That much Nathan knew. And, he also knew, at some point, he would inevitably be forced to explain his actions from the weekend. So, after lunch the disheveled star made his way to Whitey's office to do just that.

"Come in, Nathan." Whitey instructed, as he often did without even looking up.

"How'd you know it was me?" Nathan replied, impressed.

"I can smell the confusion." The old man gruffed. "And the day old smell of too much booze." After no response he took off his glasses, examined the boy sitting in front of him, sighed and continued. "That was a joke by the way. Nobody ever gets my jokes."

"Maybe cuz they're not funny, Coach."

Frowning Whitey moved on to another subject. "Little bird told me you turned down High Flyers…"

"That little bird's name Lucas?" Nathan questioned, rolling his eyes is disgust.

"He cares about you. So do I." Whitey moved closer, now sitting on the desk a mere inches away from his pupil. "You've come quite a distance this year. Don't let your father, or some foolish pride take that away."

"Coach, look at me!" He shook his head laughing at himself. "I'm a mess."

Joining in, Whitey chuckled a bit. "Nah, you're just a little bit broken. But it's nothing that a… summer at High Flyers couldn't fix."

"Could've fixed." Nathan corrected.

"Still can. Dan Scott's not the only one with pull in this town. The only thing that held you back as a player last season was heart… and I've watched that change over the past year. That camp has world-class players…and I have a hunch just being there, in that environment, playing the game you love again, for the right reasons… that will heal your heart."

Nathan considered his coach's suggestion. "You know, I dreamt about it, in the hospital, these past few months… about going to that camp. I've been dreaming about it since I was a little boy." He confessed. "But, I don't know. My mom's coming home soon and my dad's still an ass. I just don't know if I can leave her alone with him."

"Leave ol' Danny boy to me, and don't worry about your mom. She's stronger than you think."

"I dunno. I gotta think about it."

"Promise me you'll do that."

"I will." Nathan assured him, before getting up to leave.

…

After school Brooke rushed around frantically, getting her things ready so that she could meet Lucas on time. The bubbly brunette had never been one to turn down an adventure, especially a road trip, but the voyage she was about to embark on scared her a bit. This journey marked the first time that she and her broody would be alone together, away from all the madness of Tree Hill, since their split. The possibilities were endless, and knowing that terrified her.

No matter how strong and independent she had become, there was no denying that the man sitting next to her held the power to fulfill or destroy every inch of that progress.

…_**I know you're scared that I'll soon be over it,  
That's part of it all**_

**_Part of the beauty, of falling in love with you  
Is the fear you wont fall…_**

Times like these were when she missed her girlfriends the most. Peyton and Haley had always been so fantastic when it came to rationalizing. They had always seemed to know exactly what to say in order to set Brooke straight. Having them around was comforting. It was as though she had been blessed with two older sisters, both of whom were equipped with unlimited knowledge and wisdom beyond their years. For a girl who never had a mother to turn to for support, those pseudo-sisters became her saving grace.

Without them around, Brooke's options were pretty limited. No doubt, if she had come to him, Nathan would have done his best to listen. He may have even attempted to offer up some sort of guidance, even if he was never very good at it. Still, right now he was in no condition to be handing out advice. He had far too much on his own plate to worry about, and Brooke knew that, which is why she didn't have the heart or courage to tell him about the trip.

As the two friends drove along the road it became obvious to both of them that the aftermath of this visit wouldn't only affect their relationship; it would affect them all. So, in an effort to ease the uncomfortable tension that was seemingly apparent between he and his shotgun-riding partner, Lucas turned on the radio.

His action unconsciously flashed Brooke back into the memory of when she and Peyton would hit the road like they were doing now. Only with Lucas they had a purpose, a destination, and according to Peyton that would have taken all the fun out of it.

Peyton had always lived to be free, mostly just away from Tree Hill, and what she considered to be synonymous with vanity and mainstream culture. Being the epitome of everything Peyton stood against, Brooke was the last person anyone would have pegged to be her best friend. Their relationship was ironic, to say the least, but it had worked. And, for a short-lived moment, Brooke reminisced of their last road trip together.

Spring break-2004. She thought, chuckling to herself.

In her mind the events from that day played out so perfectly it was as if she was there again in the flesh. She remembered Peyton, abruptly shutting off the TV set as soon as the credits for "Thelma & Louise" rolled. Then, she recalled the look on her friend's face, enthusiastically turning towards her and proposing the road trip to nowhere.

Those were good times. She thought, pulling herself back into the dreamlike state. How could I have been skeptical? We had the craziest, best time ever!

It was true though. At first, the brunette had been hesitant to the idea of not having a set plan. However, not much later she had escaped off to her room, only to come back wearing sunglasses and a headscarf. At the time she was secretly holding another set behind her back. Seizing the moment Brooke had tossed them to an anxious Peyton, her way of saying yes, and the two girls left the room hand in hand to pack. They wasted no time after that, running around the house aimlessly, throwing any item they deemed "road worthy" into their bags. In less than thirty minutes they had nearly packed Brooke's entire house. The final touch had been creating the perfect road mix, which Peyton insisted was vital to the success of their trip. Once the play list was completely downloaded to her I pod the girls went off, and the rest was history. Looking back now Brooke had to laugh at the fact that she and Lucas were listening to the radio.

"Peyton would have turned her nose up at this sort of thing." Brooke finally uttered. "The radio, I mean. She said the radio was full of sellouts and copycats…"

"Oh, did she?" Lucas responded slyly, waiting for Brooke's nod. "Well I think she's wrong. If you find the right station the radio is full of classics. Plus, it's more spontaneous this way. You never know what you're gonna get."

"Hmm…" She contemplated. No one had ever questioned Peyton's music philosophy before. "I guess you're kinda right. I'll give you this one Broody." She grinned, taking notice to the song playing in the background.

_"If you only once would let me_

_Only just one time_

_Then be happy with the consequence_

_With whatever's gonna happen tonight_

_Don't think we're not serious_

_When's it ever not_

_The love we make is give and it's take_

_I'm game to play along. Oh oh, oh oh oh…"_

"Jimmy Eat World. Not really a classic, but they're alright." Lucas explained.

"Not bad." Brooke agreed, listening on.

_"Can't say I was never wrong_

_But some blame rests on you_

_Work and play they're never okay_

_To mix the way we do…"_

The song had an eerie resemblance to their current situation and that reality hadn't gone unnoticed by Lucas or Brooke. Their silence was evidence of that.

_"All I can say_

_I shouldn't say_

_Can we take a ride?_

_Get out of this place_

_While we still have time_

_Wanna take a ride?_

_Get out of this place_

_While we still have time_

_Yeah - We still have time…"_

When the song ended the two friends looked at each other, both slightly embarrassed by the connotations within. Peyton had always said that lyrics could speak for a person, and while Brooke had never believed it before then, she was starting to secretly wonder if her friend had been on to something all along.

There was an unmistakable bond between she and Lucas, but there was also an equally apparent barrier, which was holding their hearts at arms length from each other. Perhaps it was all a mere coincidence. But, maybe, just maybe, Peyton was right. Maybe they both needed to take a lesson from the lyrics and take a chance on themselves while they still had time.

"So, you been talking to Parker or Rachel much?" Brooke asked, evasively.

"Little bit." He responded, gaining the brunettes attention. "I wish I was in his life more, you know? As crazy as that sounds…"

"Guess I know what loss you'll be writing about for your essay." She predicted, forcing out a smirk to hide her disappointment, and looked away.

"I lost myself this year, Brooke. And when I did, I lost the people I truly care about." He admitted with a sigh. "Oh, by the way, um, when we get to Charlotte… I hope you'll understand if I spend most of our time with Haley. It's just… important that I focus on her. You know?"

A little hurt by his comment, the cheery one feigned a smile and nodded. "Of course. Everything else can wait."

Well, now I know why I don't listen to the stupid lyrics. She thought. All they do is get your hopes up! A good beat on the other hand never disappoints.

…

As the sun set upon them, a tired Lucas and Brooke pulled into the parking lot where Haley's tour bus was stationed. Grabbing a spot next to the gigantic vehicle the two quickly made their way inside. Immediately they were met with the sounds of playful fighting and giggles. Seeing Haley lying on her back, allowing Chris to tickle her from on top of her, was a sight Lucas wasn't adequately prepared to handle. It became very clear that he was unimpressed and quite angry at his best friend's behavior.

Standing with his arms crossed, glaring in Haley's direction, Lucas cleared his throat to get her attention. Brooke, being more confused and curious than anything, just stood silently, by Luke's side, politely smiling as Haley looked up for the first time to notice her two friends standing in the room.

"Lucas! Brooke!" She cried excitedly, pushing Chris off in the process. "Oh my gosh! Hi." She smiled, pulling them both into her tight embrace.

"Oh, well, it's about time the tribal leaders came to collect their squaw." Chris boasted.

"Oh, shut up, Chris." Haley and Brooke scolded in unison.

"Yeah, shut up, Chris." Lucas added, in a stern tone.

"Alright, alright. I'm going." Chris conceded, raising his hands in surrender, as he walked toward Brooke on his way out. "I see you couldn't stay away from me." He whispered loud enough for all of them to hear.

"Ugh." Brooke responded, pretending to throw up in her mouth. "Disgusting."

Her little act calmed down a maddening Lucas enough to allow Haley to shove the crooner out the door.

"So, fugitive girl. This is life, huh?" Brooke laughed along with a nodding Haley. "Nice. Even nicer if you'd get rid of that toad, Keller." She insisted.

"Oh, he's not that bad once you get to know him. Really." Haley halfheartedly defended her tour mate.

"Yea, well, you ought to know. The two of you seemed pretty close earlier." Lucas scoffed. "Exactly how well have you gotten to know each other?"

"Look, what you walked in on…it was totally innocent." Haley pleaded.

"Sure." Lucas replied in disbelief.

"It was! I swear, I'm not with Chris, okay?" She defended. Why am I on trial here by the way? We were just kidding around like…"

"We used to do?" Lucas finished her sentence bitterly.

For the first time Haley realized and acknowledged the fact that she not only left Tree Hill, Nathan, and her family; she also left Lucas, the best friend who she used to share everything with.

"Yeah." She whispered, apologetically, after a moment of silence.

Feeling out of place, and slightly intrusive, Brooke quietly excused herself to the car, leaving the two best friends to work things out.

"So…" Haley began, ushering Lucas to take a seat next to her on the couch. "What are you guys doing here? I mean, it is a Monday, and didn't we just see each other like…yesterday?" She teased, getting the first genuine smile out of Lucas the whole night.

"Very funny. For your information, we brought your English assignment. You know, high school, midterms, things you used to live for…or have you forgotten, Miss Diva?" He smiled softly.

"Oh, god, that just feels like a totally different life." She admitted, sadly, looking down at the assignment, which Lucas conveniently had written on a small piece of paper. Large capitol letters highlighted the word LOSS. "Wanna go for a walk?"

"Sure."

…

In the car, determined to be productive, Brooke searched for the adapter to Lucas's laptop. Despite her better efforts, she couldn't find it anywhere. Then, when she was just about to give up, she located the device in the glove compartment hidden behind piles of junk. As she pulled the cord out from within the mess she noticed something. In that split second the object, a child's shoebox, crashed to the floor exposing the contents.

After taking a quick peek to make sure Lucas was out of sight, Brooke rummaged through them: a picture of Rachel and Lucas, a letter and card Rachel had written him, and another picture, this one of he and Parker. Knowing that he kept all these mementos from his relationship with Rachel was heart wrenching, almost too much for her to bear. All those feelings of betrayal, inadequacy and pain, from earlier in the year, resurfaced with startling strength.

In an attempt to fight off the verge of a complete breakdown, Brooke threw Lucas's belongings back into the box, shut it and shoved it as far away from her body as she could. Still, even with it tucked away, she was unable to contain her surging emotions and eventually caved in to the pressure. Trying to hold in her unwanted cries she instinctively cupped her mouth, covering up her quivering lips, as she exhaled deeply.

Unable to speak Brooke reclined the seat back and closed her eyes. There was no telling when Lucas and Haley would be coming back so the brunette forced herself into partial relaxation. The last thing she wanted was for either of them to find her sulking.

"We're friends." She reminded herself. "Just friends. It's not a crime to save things from previous relationships. So, I shouldn't freak out. Yes, this is okay, no freaking out."

Okay, I'm freaking out. She thought. Damn it! Get it together, Davis!

…

In the meantime Lucas and Haley had been walking silently towards the river walk. After a few awkward moments Haley finally came out with the subject both of them had been tiptoeing around.

"I'm guessing you're here because of Nathan?" She accused.

"Kind of." Lucas admitted.

"You know that he told me not to come home, right?" She retorted. "You know that? Can you believe that man? First he wants me to stay, then he doesn't want me to come back…I can't keep up with him! He's incorrigible." She huffed.

"Okay, Ms. Bennet." Lucas joked sarcastically, making fun of her choice of adjective. "To put it in a way you might understand: Mr. Darcy is under the impression that you are betrothed to another man, one Christopher Keller, and he's heart broken. So cut the guy some slack." He paused, to gage her reaction. "You guys did basically go on national television and announce your relationship…"

"Woah, woah. First of all, cut it out with the literary references. I get the point. Still, only you would recognize that parallel, so by default you are a dork too." She poked at him. "More importantly, though, when did I announce this relationship that doesn't exist?"

"Uh…MTV pod cast ring a bell?"

"I never said we were dating!"

"Well you didn't deny it, and Chris, well he can be pretty convincing. All I'm saying is: I can see where the guy is coming from, alright?"

Haley sighed. "You do realize you're defending Nathan Scott right?"

"Look, mostly, I'm here because of us, Haley. You know, I was… sitting in class… and looked over and saw your empty seat… and it struck me; that not too long ago, it was just you and me."

"Yea." She grabbed his arm. "Amazing how far we've come since the beginning of the year." They reminisced for a moment, before her tune changed. "Now, if only I had known that all this would come back to bite me in the ass, I would have insisted you two stay enemies!"

"Nice Hales, real nice. For real though, suddenly, it just felt wrong, you not being there."

"You think I was wrong for leaving." She asked, stopping abruptly, mid gait.

"Here's what I think: you stood by me when I left the Rivercourt…because a voice in my head told me that it's what I had to do."

"Yeah, so?"

"So I'm here for you, Hales." He cocked his head, giving her a reassuring smile. "And I always will be. Even… when I don't understand it."

"Thanks, Luke." She whispered, sadly. "Thank you." She repeated more confidently. "Because… sometimes I don't understand it either."

…

_**  
**_Having regained her composure Brooke decided to head back into the trailer, finding Chris back inside practicing on his guitar.

"Haley and Lucas aren't back yet, but you can come into the Devil's lair." Chris proposed. "Drop your things, come have sex with Chris Keller."

Brooke glared at him. "Let's just get one thing straight, okay…people, who look like me," she explained, displaying her curves, "_don't_ have sex with people who look like you." She pointed in his direction, with assertion. Got it?"

"Whatever." He dismissed, going back to playing his guitar, before noticing her thumbing away at a large envelope nervously. "What's that? Pregnancy test results?"

"No you idiot!" She corrected. "My designs were excepted into Rogue Vogue…"

"What's that some Madonna wannabe summer camp?"

"It's only like the most prestigious competition for emerging fashion designers; in New York!"

"So why do you look so constipated? You should be on cloud 9."

"I am…it's just so bizarre. I never sent my sketches in…it must be a mistake." Her enthusiasm fell.

"Let me see the letter." He demanded, holding out his hand. "Nope, this is the real deal." He finally concluded after thorough examination. "No one could have pulled off a fake this good, not even me."

"It can't be." She argued. "I swear, I didn't…"

"Well somebody else did…my bet's on lover boy. Seems like the type." He predicted, cockily, as he placed an arm around her. "Either way, _we've_ got something to celebrate now don't we?"

"Yea…" She exhaled, smiling tearfully.

"Okay then," he agreed, moving to the mini bar and coming back with two champagne glasses. "To your sketches…"

Grabbing the glass she nodded. "To my sketches…"

…

Chris raised his glass for the one-hundredth time. "To your designs."

"We've toasted to my designs like a million times now." Brooke protested, laughing. "Oh what the hell…to my designs."

The two of them were both incredibly drunk by this point, so much that Chris Keller seemed surprisingly less vile to the budding designer. In fact, his company was, to a certain degree, enjoyable.

…_**And I hate the phone,  
But I wish you'd call  
Thought being alone,  
Was better than, was better than...**_

"Lucas… is the one for me." Brooke whispered, smiling giddily to herself, after a few moments of silent revelation.

"Actually, my name is Chris." He moved in as if he was going to kiss her, only to be pushed away by a now scowling Brooke. "Don't be like that, come on, listen, have another drink. To your sketches."

"Nice try." She turned him down, shaking her head.

"Fair enough, it's late, I'm attractive…it scares you. I get it."

"Are you always this delusional?" She asked, holding back hordes of laughter.

"That depends…do you find it sexy?" He grinned until her lack of expression suggested no. "Really though, Lucas is the one?"

"Yes." She replied firmly.

"Huh? Then why did I see you crying like a baby in the car earlier?"

"You saw that?" Brooke spat, embarrassed to know that someone had seen her in that state.

"Women only cry like that for one reason: a man."

"I just, I found this stuff he had kept from a past relationship. I freaked, but I shouldn't have."

"Ehhh." He looked away uncomfortably.

"What? I should have freaked out?" She jumped to conclusion. "Wait. Why am I confiding in _you_?"

Chris laughed at her predicament. "Cuz you're drunk."

"Good point."

"Anyways, I wasn't saying you should freak out …actually, I envy you Brooke. Having found someone… to trust and confide in, like Lucas; someone that won't take advantage of it." He confessed. "That stuff he keeps probably means nothing."

"Really? You think?"

"Wait. It wasn't from that hot red head was it? Cuz now that I think about it there are a couple reasons why he'd keep that stuff. Well, one in particular, if ya know what I mean." He smirked.

"Ugh!" Brooke slugged him. "And, just when I was starting to think you weren't a pervy ass!"

"Hey, she's a fox…nothing pervy about that." He argued, forcing Brooke to move to the other side of the room before she rearranged his face.

"What's goin on in here?" Haley interrupted, as she and Lucas stepped in the room.

"She was just hitting on me." Chris proclaimed, while Brooke sneered.

"Are you guys drunk?" Lucas asked, noticing the empty champagne and beer bottles.

"Maybe?" Brooke admitted, handing Haley the letter as an explanation.

"Congratulations, Ms Davis, your designs have been selected to appear at this years Rogue Vogue showcase." Haley read from the letter.

"See, we were celebrating!" Brooke interjected, not able to contain her excitement. "This is like the hugest honor. I mean, I haven't the slightest idea how this all came about…cuz I didn't even send in my sketches, but…"

"Wow." Haley cut in mid-sentence, moving forward to give her friend a hug. "Congratulations."

"Yea. Congratulations, Brooke. You deserve it." Lucas added with a hint of sadness.

"Thank you!" Brooke squealed, moving quickly to wrap Lucas in a huge hug. "You turned them in didn't you?" She smiled in adoration.

"Uh." He stammered. "I wanted to, I planned to, but no…" His face dropped, along with everyone else's.

"You're kidding…" Chris blurted out, shocked.

"Seriously, that move had you written all over it Luke." Haley added in amazement.

"So who did then?" Brooke demanded to know.

"Honestly, I have no idea." He replied, genuinely confused. "Unless…"

"Unless what?" Brooke, Haley and Chris yelled impatiently.

"Rachel…" Lucas started. "She's the only one that knew. It had to have been her."

"No way! The redhead right?" Chris shouted in amusement. "This should be interesting."

"Rachel? Great…" Brooke muttered, falling back into the couch.

"Listen, I know you two got off on the wrong foot." Lucas tried to console Brooke. "But, when you get to know her she's really not that bad."

Brooke and Haley just starred at Lucas blankly, finding it unnecessary to point out the fact that Haley had used the very same line in regards to Chris. Not to mention that this was the same girl that hid her child's true paternity for weeks, inadvertently ruining Brooke and Lucas's relationship.

"Not that bad, huh?" Brooke repeated, unconvinced.

"Point taken." Lucas countered, putting the unpopular subject to rest.

"So when is it?" Haley interjected, refocusing Brooke's attention onto the contest.

"Two weeks from now… March 15th-17th." Brooke read from the letter. "That's our spring break right?"

"Yes." Lucas confirmed.

"Well that's awesome. We'll be in New York City then too! We can hang out some more considering we didn't really get to catch up tonight."

"I'd love that." Brooke accepted.

"Well, as much as I'd love to stay, I think we better get going." Lucas suggested. "I've got one hell of a ride ahead of me, since, you missy," he pointed at Brooke, "you won't be driving."

"Sorry." Brooke agreed, flashing a wide, innocent smile.

The three friends started to make their way outside to say goodbye when Lucas pretended he had left something inside.

"I'll grab it for ya." Haley offered.

"No, you know what, I need to use the restroom anyways." Lucas reasoned. "Be right back."

With that Lucas escaped back into the trailer, finding Chris alone, just the way he had hoped. On his way to the restroom Lucas walked past without as much as a nod, but on his way back he had a different tactic planned.

The crooner noticed his return immediately, taking the opportunity to get out one last word.

"It was great seeing you, buddy." The musician spoke effortlessly, just as Lucas had grabbed the doorknob. "We should do this more often. Next time bring the redhead. You know, complete the tri-fecta."

Enraged by Chris's lack of respect the broody blonde quickly checked to make sure Haley and Brooke were still out of ears distance. He then turned back into the room, slammed the door shut and stalked up to Chris, looking down upon him with discerning eyes.

"Wow, yo-you angry or you just hitting on me?" Chris tried to lighten the mood, unsuccessfully.

"You ever tried singing with you jaw wired shut?" Lucas growled.

"I guess you're angry."

"Do you think this is a joke? Because it's not!"

Chris looked away, setting his guitar down, as the situation grew increasingly tense.

"You're messing with people's lives; people I care about…" Lucas continued bantering.

"Messing how?" Chris stood up, meeting his accusers glares. "You mean having sex with Haley…or Brooke?"

Lucas eyed him coldly, shaking his head. He was one step away from hitting him, hard.

"Cuz I never did that, okay? Is that what you needed to hear?" He mocked Lucas. "How's Nathan doing, anyway?"

"Don't go there!"

"Dude, you don't think I wonder about the guy? I'm a lyricist; I carry all that shit around."

"Well, since you're so current on everyone's love affairs, then you should probably know he's doing terrible!"

"He should be. Haley's an amazing girl. It would suck to lose her."

"And you don't feel the slightest bit guilty about your part in that?" Lucas roared.

"No." Chris replied, without hesitation. "And I'll tell you why: this is a one in a million chance we're taking here. You gotta be selfish as hell; you're either all in… or you're out. You don't think I've tried to talk to her about it? Hell, man, I've talked to her a lot more than you have these past few months."

Lucas looked away after hearing that last part. It stung to hear, especially coming from Chris, but he was right.

"Listen, Luke, I know she's your friend, so… you can hate me for helping her chase her dream, but… I'm just trying to help her, now. You know?" He plopped back on the couch, grabbing his guitar. "The same way you are. The rest, it's up to her."

Without another word Chris began to play again, drowning out Lucas's sighs as he walked to the door. Before he could walk through it to leave, Chris pointed at him.

"Hey!" Chris shouted, gaining Luke's attention. "Don't forget to tell Brooke I said _'hi'_."

Lucas mumbled profanities to himself as he walked to the car. Chris sat contently, finding amusement in the broody blonde's uncanny disposition.

After another round of goodbyes, this time more brief, the two friends waved farewell to Haley and departed. Brooke soon excused herself into a much-needed nap, leaving Lucas to man the road alone.

…

A couple hours later Brooke awoke refreshed. She mentally tallied the day's events in her head as she watched Lucas, driving along. He seemed more broody and desolate than before. She was certain something was bothering him.

…_**And I know its easy to say, but its harder to feel this way  
And I miss you more than I should, than I thought I could  
I can't get my mind off of you…**_

"Ah, you're back, sleepy head." He gave her a slight smile.

Brooke returned his gesture, but couldn't shake the feeling that he was hurting. "You miss Haley, don't you?" She finally spoke, uncertain of what else to say.

Lucas nodded, not wanting to seem insensitive. Though, while he did miss Haley a lot, it wasn't what was truly eating away at him.

"You gonna be alright?" She asked, concerned.

"Yeah, it's just hard to let someone go, you know?" Lucas replied, ambiguously.

Knowingly, Brooke swallowed. Out of fear for how much emotion and vulnerability she was about to show the brunette purposely bit down on her lip.

"It's okay that you're into Rachel." She told him, not able to hold it in any longer.

Having caught Lucas off guard it took him a while to process her accusation. He frowned, trying to decipher her statement. To him it seemed odd for her to come out and say something like that. He knew he was in no way, shape or form still into Rachel. In fact, his feelings were actually quite the opposite.

_Why would Brooke assume otherwise?_ He thought, still too bewildered to approach the situation.

"I didn't want to say anything, okay." She began to justify, realizing his confusion. "And, just know that I was only looking for the car adapter but, I found the things in your glove compartment." She paused, forcing out a stiff smile. "It's fine."

At that Lucas understood where all of this was coming from. He wanted nothing more than to clarify his reasons, prove her suspicions wrong, but before he could Brooke shrugged it off and turned her head to look out the window. He had lost his chance, at least for now.

…

After a mostly silent ride Lucas and Brooke emerged into the city limits of Tree Hill. Within a few minutes they had arrived at Nathan's house. Exhausted, neither objected to Brooke's quick departure.

"See ya." She called, shutting the door, before walking away.

"See ya." He sighed back, watching to make sure she got into the pool house safely.

_Coventry Patmore once wrote,_ Lucas thought, as he drove off._ "To him that waits all things reveal themselves, provided that he has the courage not to deny, in the darkness, what he has seen in the light."_

Inside the pool house Brooke contemplated her next move. While brushing her teeth she remembered the words Haley had recited to her earlier: "_Courage is as often the outcome of despair as of hope; in the one case we have nothing to lose, in the other everything to gain." ~Diane de Poitiers._

_See, Haley always knew what to say!_ She thought, smiling, as she placed her head down to rest.

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*****The lyrics for this chapter are from "The Fear You Won't Fall," by Joshua Radin*****

**A/N: Okay, so I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Things are starting to turn around, but you know with Brooke and Lucas things are never smooth. Next chapter is BL official couple reunion time, so please remember to review! I promise if I get a good turn out the next update will be much sooner. Hugs!**


	16. Gotta Figure This Out

**All Those Years Ago**

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**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. All characters belong to Mark Schwann and the CW.

**A/N: **I don't even know what to say for myself other than I've been pre-occupied with trying to find a job. It's still no excuse for the wait, especially when I promised frequent updates. I swear I had good intentions! To be honest, the weight of this chapter (the BL reunion) scared me. I wanted it to be perfect, which I now admit was a foolish For my loyal readers (LongLiveBrucas, Mickei, Dee, Liz, PrincessKarlita, Brucas10) some new faces (Patina, BrucasLver92, alwaysrivercourt, xnxdx, kajol7) and anyone that I missed, please accept my apologies. I hope this chapter and the next one make up for lost time! Please, please, please review (and don't hold back!) Hugs!

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**Gotta Figure This Out**

…_**I separated my heart from my head**_

_**To feel out what's inside**_

_**I don't like what I see**_

_**So I say good night…**_

To say that the relationship between Lucas and Brooke had become awkward would have been an understatement. Ever since getting back from their road trip together both had been dodging one another like the black plague. Unfortunately, given that they were forced to be near each other during coinciding basketball and cheerleading schedules, their avoidance was far from discrete to those around them.

The funny part about it, or rather ironic, was that both of them were hiding from inevitabilities outside of their control. Their resistance and ignorance to their love was infuriating to watch. Coupled with the fact that neither was very skilled at hiding their adoration for one another, Rachel and Nathan had just about lost their mind.

From a basketball standpoint, Lucas's shooting had been suffering, and as far as one particular cheerleader was concerned, so had Brooke's choreography. With state championships and national competitions on the horizon, it was time for an intervention.

"What's goin on man?" Nathan asked, as he checked the ball in Lucas's direction. "You call this basketball? I play better with my eyes closed."

"Shut up." Lucas responded coldly, taking a shot and missing.

"See." Nathan pointed out. "You can't even make your weak ass jump shots anymore. You're heart's not in it…"

"There's nothing wrong with my heart, Nate."

"Yeah? What did you tell me after the accident?" He paused. "You told me you didn't wanna be afraid to live your life, and I should do the same."

"That's right."

"Well I don't buy it, Luke. I think there's something in your heart that you're running from."

The broody blonde growled at his brother's intrusive nature, sighed at the truth behind his accusation and looked away. In his head he couldn't help but play back the conversation that he had just had with Brooke that very morning.

"_Hey." He remembered saying, interrupting Brooke as she slowly packed her suitcase for this weekend's trip to NYC. He was standing with his arms crossed, leaning against the doorframe, sighing. "Look, are we ever… gonna talk about…Rachel? And the stuff you found?" He had strained himself to say._

_Brooke didn't even lift her head up to meet him before responding evasively. "It's not a big deal." He remembered looking away and shaking his head because obviously it was a bigger deal that she was allowing it to be. Yet, before he could press the issue any further she had said the following: "Actually, I was… kinda relieved."_

"_Relieved?" He remembered thinking aloud. The thought of her being relieved by the whole situation still haunted him but not as much as what she had said next. _

"_It's okay that you're into Rachel, really." There she went again with the denial. "I mean we've become such good friends lately…and I dunno, being together like that…if I hadn't found those things, maybe something would have happened between us and ruined all that." She then smiled and nodded._

"_But you seemed… upset… that I held onto all that stuff; you still do."_

"_Finding that stuff was kind of like… evidence." She finally admitted, causing Lucas to look down sadly. "It reminded me of what happened… and how it happened."_

_Here came the worst part, Lucas mentally prepared himself. _

"_I guess my heart just wasn't ready for that…but, we're good as friends right?" _

_Brooke had managed to force that smile, however unconvincing it may have been, back on her face regardless of the pain she felt. And, in that moment, because of that, Lucas felt and understood for the first time the immensity of her pain, which he had caused. And all he could say to her question was: "Yes."_

Lucas then brought himself back to reality. "What are you psychic now? You gonna take up wearing a turban too? Maybe get a crystal ball?" He asked, sarcastically.

"I see you brought your joke book with you today, big bro. Go ahead, avoid the subject all you want." Nathan urged. "But you know there's a girl you had, sorry," he said clearing his throat, "have feelings for…"

"Nathan!" Lucas warned.

"Look me in the eye. Tell me I'm wrong." Nathan demanded, as Lucas turned to look but couldn't say the words. "See? Now you can be mad at me all you want; you can say your heart's fine… but until you tell this girl how you feel…" He shrugged, not knowing how else to put it. "Your heart's gonna be flawed. You need to talk to her Luke."

Sensing his younger brother was more right that he wanted to admit Lucas just nodded in agreement. There was someone that he hadn't been completely honest with, and maybe it was about time he stepped up to the plate?

…

On the other side of the gym, in the far right corner, the cheerleaders had been busy rehearsing what looked to be a new dance routine. Typically, walking into a scene like that wouldn't have unnerved the brunette captain. However, today's practice was a different story, because Rachel and another mystery guest had taken control of it, without her permission.

"Whoa, stop, halt, cut!" Brooke shouted, turning off the music and eyeing Mouth, the mystery guest, who for some strange twist of fate was teaching her squad dance moves. The entire production baffled her. "Excuse me? Why is everybody here early?"

"Early?" Bevin screeched out of habit. "You're like an hour late!"

"I don't think so." Brooke argued, still trying unsuccessfully to meet Mouth's eyes. "Unlike _you,_ I've never thought there was a thirteen o'clock."

Bevin looked offended for a second but continued unscathed. "Brooke, Rachel said you wanted us here an hour early."

"And, since when do we listen to _her_ over _me_?"

"We thought it was you…" the ditsy blonde defended.

"You didn't think it was weird that I wasn't here this whole time? She asked her squad, looking a bit hurt by the fact that nobody had missed her. "Where did you think I was?"

"Late, as usual." Everyone but Mouth responded casually.

Instinctively Brooke glared and pointed at Rachel. "_You_." She muttered aloud, giving the girl, who up until that point had been happily uninvolved with the conversation, the ammunition to proceed.

Moving seductively from the bleachers, which she had been leaning against, Rachel approached her. Within seconds the girl had strutted over to Brooke's side, releasing the auburn lock of hair she had been twirling out of boredom along the way. The two, self-proclaimed archenemies stood mere inches from one another, both contemplating their next move.

Rachel seized the opportunity. "Brooke, the classic's coming up and we don't have a routine yet. It's not like you've been captain of the year lately." She reminded. "It's nothing personal…I just saw Mouth doin his thing and what can I say…boy's got moves." Rachel explained. "You've had so much goin on lately, with preparing for Rogue Vogue…I thought we'd surprise you. So, surprise!"

"The only way I'd be surprised right now is if you were actually wearing underwear!" Brooke shot back, cattily, avoiding the subject.

"No surprises in that department." The redhead smiled immodestly, gaining Mouth's boyishly innocent attention.

"Ugh! Need I remind you this is _my_ squad…therefore I make the rules?" Brooke sneered, waiting for some sort of response from the redhead, which she wasn't granted. "A word…in private?" She demanded, getting in Rachel's face.

"Fine, I can see you're in one of those uber needy moods..."

"Mouth, just keep doin what you were doin." Brooke instructed. "I'll admit you are a man of many talents." She whispered in his ear, giving him a quick wink before turning back to the girls. "No more surprises, okay? And, that goes for everyone…"

With that Brooke stormed out into the hallway where Rachel was waiting for her. There were so many emotions running through her head at that time it was a miracle that the brunette actually got a coherent statement out.

"This, this is why you sent my sketches into Rogue Vogue?" Brooke accused, angrily. "To take over my squad? Cuz, trust me, that ain't happening…"

Rachel chuckled lightly to herself. "Nice plan, Davis…I actually wish I'd have thought of it, but no."

Brooke didn't flinch. Instead she stared down her redheaded nemesis, trying to force out a confession using only her mind power. She was still convinced that Rachel had acted on ulterior motives; something she had believed all along, since the first time Lucas revealed who was behind it. The only problem was: she couldn't figure out what those self-serving reasons had been. If Rachel's objective hadn't been to steal Brooke's squad right from underneath her, then why go through the trouble of sending away her designs? Nothing about it made sense.

"Look, I know you hate me…" Rachel broke in, stating the obvious. "Honestly, considering everything I've done, I don't blame you."

"Yea." Brooke agreed, wearily.

"I did it for Lucas, okay? And you, I guess…" Rachel admitted, rolling her eyes at the last part, noticing Brooke's obvious glee. "He'd been talking about it for weeks before the accident…drove me nuts. Whichever way, I knew the deadline. I knew how much it meant to him. So, when he didn't wake up right away, and I knew he'd miss it…I guess I figured it was the least I could do."

Brooke's demeanor softened after hearing Rachel's confession. She remained quiet for a few seconds, taking in all the information, before mounting another question. "So, what was this: a peace offering? Some kind of apologetic gesture?"

"Ha! Good one." The redhead denied callously, not wanting to seem weak. "Unfortunately, while if it were for anyone it would be Lucas, this bitch," she pointed to herself, "does not do apologies."

Brooke smirked. "Did you just refer to yourself as 'Bitch' in third person?" She teased, loving the fact that she not only recognized third person but also had called Rachel on it. "So, is that what we should call you now? 'Bitch'? It does have a nice ring to it."

"Shut up, Slut." Rachel returned the honor to a still smiling Brooke.

For a moment the two enemies seemed to forge a sort of bond, built upon the understanding that both of them hid behind certain exteriors. Underneath all of that garbage and disgust for one another, they were actually quite similar. All they wanted was to love and be loved in return.

Noticing the unfamiliar territory that they were entering, Rachel interrupted. "Listen, before this gets all creepy, Full House style, let me just say one more thing."

"Okay…shoot."

The redhead paused for a moment to build suspense. "Quit pussy footing around the fact that you are in love with Lucas!"

"What?" Brooke choked.

"You heard me. It's so obvious even a blind person could tell." Rachel speculated confidently. "He's in love with you too, by the way, much as I hate to admit it."

"Really?"

"Oh don't be that girl…all surprised and shit, pretending not to believe it."

"News flash, Walter Cronkite, I am that girl…so maybe I need a little reassuring. Is that a crime?" Brooke protested.

"No. But, it should be." Rachel confirmed, rolling her eyes and walking away.

"You can't just walk away without telling me! You brought it up! This is so not fair. Come on!" Brooke begged, with her best puppy dog eyes. "Please…pretty please with sugar on top."

"Bonding time is over, D.J.…I've already said _way_ too much."

"Ugh!" Brooke fumed. "By the way…I'm totally Stephanie!"

…

When practice had ended Brooke made her way over to the bleachers, where she posted up, directly across from the guy's locker room. Like earlier in the year, she waited there to meet up with Nathan. It was a nice return, doing the things they used to, having him back in her life again, without the feeling that she constantly had to watch out for him. And, an extra perk: as far as the rest of Tree Hill was concerned, the king and queen were back on top, together.

Having built up that shield again, Brooke had also been feeling pretty confident lately. Yet, as she stood there, a part of her still mauled over Rachel's advice.

_Rachel just wants to see me suffer_. She thought. _There is no way that I am just putting myself out there! Ugh! And, I can't believe that whore just walked away with out telling me why!_

"A little spacey today?" Nathan asked, as he nudged Brooke, not getting the usual greeting back.

"Uh, oh…" Brooke stammered. "Yea, I guess."

"I saw you had your claws out earlier. What was goin on?"

"It was that obvious?" She responded, shyly. His knowing eyes confirmed it while they walked. "Rachel went behind my back and had the girls come early to go over some routine she and Mouth came up with. She doesn't think I can handle the pressure of being captain with leaving for Rogue Vogue and all."

"Can you?" He stopped and asked abruptly.

"Nate!" She shoved him. "Of course!"

"Okay…okay." He relented. "I'm just sayin. You _can_ ask for help sometimes."

"Alright…_who_ are you and what have you done with my best friend? You know, the one who takes his problems out on a bottle of Jack?"

"Very funny." He laughed, as he started up the car's ignition. "Listen, I talked to Whitey today…I think I might be going to High Flyers this summer. If all goes well this next month, I could be playing at Duke in the fall."

"Wow. That's awesome." She sprung towards him, wrapping her arms around him.

After a moment Brooke slumped back in her chair, watching the road breeze by in silence. The last couple of months had been so wild that she really hadn't taken the time to enjoy any of it. This was their senior year and in less than six months from now all of this would be gone.

…_**Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming in color**_

_**Black and white is not my friend**_

_**Candy-coated figures hold me in my bed…**_

"Hey." She whispered. "I know you might not want to hear about this now, but I went to see Haley a couple weeks back with Lucas."

"So, that's where you disappeared to? Figures. How is she and…"

"Keller?" She finished his thought. He nodded. "They're not together."

Nathan's eyes shot up to meet hers. "Whatdya mean, _not_ together? Let's not go over this again…we saw the video…they came here together for the wedding. How much more proof do you need?"

"You're right. It sure looked like they were together, but did you ever think to ask her?" Brooke pushed on. "Because…I finally did, and you know how big of an ass I feel like now, knowing that it was all some stupid misunderstanding? What were we thinking Nate?" Brooke's voice got shaky.

"We weren't." He replied, plain and simple.

"How can you be so calm about this? And, why didn't you tell me…it was _you_ that told her not to come back…"

"Yea. I did! Because she's out there living her dream! Who am I to take that away from her?" He paused, regaining his composure. "I love her, Brooke, and I don't know why it took me losing her to realize it…but don't make my mistake."

"Wait, what are you talking about? Haley still loves you. All you have to do is take her back!"

"Right, kinda like with you and Lucas. See it's not so easy, getting back in the ring; especially with the one that knocked you out in the first place."

…

Back in her room Brooke frantically changed out of her cheerleading uniform into a more suitable outfit for her trip. Just as she was about to pick up her suitcase to leave, Lucas poked his head in.

"You need some help?" He asked, pointing to her expanding pile of things.

"Umm…I think I can get it."

"Okay, well let me walk you down to the taxi at least."

"Sure."

Brooke then reached down for her bag, struggling to pick it up. It was a lot heavier than she remembered it being this morning. She cursed herself for adding in the last minute pair of stilettos, Marc Jacobs bag and jewelry. Being prepared was about to bite her in the ass.

As expected, Lucas came to her rescue. He gently placed his hand on her's, which was still clutching the handle. "Let me."

While Brooke knew she didn't stand a chance, for some reason she couldn't get herself to pull away either. Her hesitance didn't seem to bother Lucas. In fact, he seemed to be thoroughly enjoying her inability to move out from under his grasp. It wasn't until she heard the roar of the taxi pulling up that she finally released. He quickly placed her things in the trunk and rushed back to her side.

Brooke shrugged, not knowing what else to say. "So I guess this is good-bye…"

Instead of verbally responding, Lucas just pulled her into a tight embrace. Even though she would only be gone a few days it seemed like an eternity. Neither one of them wanted to let go but considering she had a plane to catch Brooke slowly stepped back.

Her smile was sad, knowing they would leave so many things unsaid.

_Maybe this trip will be a good thing?_ She thought, moving to get in the backseat. _I'll have some time to re-think things…gotta figure this out._

To her surprise, Lucas reached out, grabbed her by the hand and pulled her back toward him. His intensity was so electric that her body sort of fell into rhythm with him, like a perfectly timed dance sequence. His lips instinctively pressed up against her's and they kissed. For a split second they were one and flashbacks of how they once were dangled in her mind.

"What was that?" She gasped, breaking away from him in disbelief.

"I wanna _be_ with you, Brooke." He reached out for her again; only this time she had already escaped his grasp.

"What?" She turned to ask, wide-eyed and open-mouthed.

"I'm sorry. I know we're just friends… but it's…how I feel."

His confession brought tears of joy, anger and sadness to her eyes. "What about Rachel's _stuff_?"

Lucas moved closer, trying his best to explain. "I keep that stuff as a _reminder_ of how badly I screwed things up." He paused "With _you_. To remind myself, if I ever get a second chance… I'd never let you go again."

He was so convincing it took Brooke's breath away. "I don't know what to say. I, um…

Before she could compose a reply, the cab driver honked his horn, giving the indication that she needed to hurry up. Out of habit she looked to the driver, who was impatiently waving her on and then back to a desperate Lucas. She nodded, wiping away the tears from her face as more gathered in her eyes. Time was running out, and she didn't even know where to begin in her reply.

"I gotta go." She whispered, turning down her head and closing the door behind her.

…_**I've never been so deep inside a shadow**_

_**I've never been so insecure of what I know…**_

Not about to waste any more time the driver sped away, leaving a disappointed Lucas behind. In the backseat, Brooke continued to sob uncontrollably. This weekend, Rogue Vogue, it was supposed to be the most exciting time of her life. Yet, at this point, all she could think about was how little all of that mattered.

For the last three months Brooke had done nothing but prepare for this very chance. If all went well she knew she would be on the verge of making all of her dreams come true. So why did it feel like she was making a mistake…walking away from all of it? Why did it feel so wrong? For the first time Brooke understood exactly how Haley had felt when she left for tour.

…

From his bedroom window, Nathan looked on as a defeated Lucas watched Brooke drive away. The broody blonde surrendered to his emotions, knelt down on the sidewalk and cupped his head between his hands. He was completely devastated and equally bewildered. For all he knew his actions right then and there had ruined any chance of he and Brooke getting back together.

_If only she had finished what she was saying?_ He thought. _At least then I'd know where I stood! Damn cabby! _

He then rolled over and punched the lawn next to him, angered that the driver had pressured her to leave.

"Whoa there killer!" Nathan shouted from the porch. "I can't afford for you and that jump shot of yours to get any worse."

Lucas looked up with resentment. "This was what you wanted, remember?"

By that time Nathan was standing directly above Lucas, with a hand extended. "Come on, get up." He instructed.

"Why should I? I know you just saw what happened."

"She kissed you back didn't she?"

"Yea, I guess. But then…"

"No buts." Nathan declared, pulling Lucas up from the ground. "You know, Brooke always told me: 'sometimes people play hard-to-get because they need to know the other person's feelings are real.'"

"So what's your point Casanova?"

"Prove it! And not by some weak ass ambush kiss right before she's about to leave for the chance of a lifetime! I mean really, man, didn't you learn anything from Haley and I?"

The two brothers laughed at the irony until Lucas proposed an idea neither of them could ignore. "Why don't we go to NYC for spring break…surprise the girls?

"Are you nuts?" Nathan stammered, realizing that his brother was not joking. "What about basketball?"

"It's not like we can't pick up a ball and practice while we're there? New York has hoops just like us and we get time off…might as well put it to good use."

"No way…" Nathan groaned at his brother's persistence, walking away while shaking his head in disbelief.

"Come on. Think about it. You love her right?" Lucas paused, noticing Nathan's body stiffen up. "You said it yourself: we have to show our feelings are real…"

"No offense, Luke, but I think that ship has sailed…at least for me."

"Look, that's where you're wrong, okay, cause here's the thing…Haley has loved exactly two things in her entire life: music and you. And, as much as I hate to admit this, it took loving you for her to find the confidence to pursue the other. Did you know she hasn't written a song since you told her not to come home?

Nathan's blank reaction confirmed his ignorance. "Why?" He asked.

"I suppose her talent was tied to _you_; no Nathan, no music." Lucas paused, letting Nathan ponder as he grabbed the basketball from underneath the hoop. "Whatdya say we play for it? I win; you go with me…no questions asked. You win, and we forget the whole thing."

"Throw in $100 and you've got yourself a deal!"

After shaking hands on it, the two began playing a heated game of one-on-one. For the next hour shots were made and plans were paved. When all was said and done only one could come out victorious. That day, having fate on his side, Lucas came out on top.

…_**I've gotta figure it out**_

_**I need a story to tell**_

_**Where's the feeling I long for**_

_**I've gotta figure it out**_

_**Before I lose you, love…**_

"Guess _your_ talent is tied to Haley?" Lucas jabbed, sinking the game winning three-point shot. "Pack your bags baby, we're goin to New York!"

Frustrated from his defeat Nathan sulked off to his room. "When are we leaving?" He forced out before disappearing into his house.

"8:00 tomorrow morning!" Lucas beamed. "And don't be late."

"Whatever…"

…

In New York, Brooke was just entering the city limits. As she phoned Haley, the skyline emerged in front of her. It was beautiful; unlike anything she had ever seen before.

"Hey city girl!" She spoke excitedly into the receiver. "Why didn't you tell me how amazing this place was?"

Haley chuckled to herself. "I take it you're just reaching the city? Incredible right? I know…"

"So where do I go?"

"301 Park Ave…The Waldorf Astoria. The driver should know where to go. I'll meet you in the lobby."

"The Waldorf Astoria?" Brooke screeched. "You're kidding me, right? That place is like infamous!"

"Yea, it's pretty unreal. I can't wait to see you though!"

"I know…I'll be there in 15."

"See ya."

Brooke then flipped her phone shut and instructed the driver to continue on to her destination. For the next few minutes the ambitious brunette soaked in her newfound surrounds, like a typical tourist. She gawked at the tall skyscrapers, the billions of tiny lights on the horizon, the swarms of people out past midnight; everything she saw was a worthy distraction.

…_**Big city streets are calling me loud**_

_**Their busy keeps me high**_

_**This quiet town is wearing me down tonight**_

_**I know that I should stay here for awhile**_

_**Listen to the sound of my shaky heart**_

_**Looking for gold in the ground…**_

Even so, she couldn't help but think about certain events that had taken place earlier that day. From Rachel's confession to Nathan's accusation to Lucas's declaration, everything was so surreal.

"Um… excuses me, Mr. cab driver." She tapped on the window separating her from the front. The Indian man responded with a nod. "Would you mind doing me a favor and turning on the radio? I have some…really important decisions to make." She exhaled deeply, closing her eyes to concentrate.

"Of course." He replied in a slightly sarcastic tone. "I have a daughter your age, you know? And a son…but boy you girls amaze me…get weirder and weirder every day…" He trailed off, mumbling. "Trying out for boom-bastic dance team, that wear hooker outfit, just for attention from boy…using the radio to make decisions…such silliness" He rambled a bit more, obviously bothered deeply by his own daughters situation, but finished with a friendly sigh and turned on the music.

Much to Brooke's disappointment the song was in a language she didn't understand. "Would you tell me what he's saying, please?" She asked embarrassedly, quickly flashing him a playful smile.

He laughed a little to himself, trying his best to explain the irony. "It's a story of a… young girl who's very sad."

"Oh." Brooke replied, kinking up her eyebrow in confusion.

"She's torn between two men." The driver continued, watching Brooke through the rear view mirror as she listened intently. "One man is… very rich… and offers to take her away from her home… and show her all the wonders of the world."

"So why is she torn?"

"Well." The older man smiled knowingly. "Because the _other_ man… this man," he pointed to the radio, signaling it being the man singing, "has shown her true happiness…but they are now just friends." He looks up to see Brooke's face fall. "She loves him very much."

"Yeah." She sighed, empathetically, feeling torn herself. "Just friends…"

"My name is Duoad, by the way…I don't think I introduced myself earlier when you were on the phone."

"Brooke Davis."

"So, Brooke, what brings you to the Big Apple?" He wondered, trying to change the subject. "You said you had some important decisions to make?"

Unfortunately, his question only sparked another round of soul searching, self-enlightenment and an extremely elaborate portrayal of her senior year in Tree Hill, which even after all that did not prove to help.

"But I don't understand how you think you could ever trust this, uh-Lucas, a second time around?"

It was a fair question, given their history, but most of the time with true love 'the heart has reasons which reason cannot know.' Plus, Brooke had her own demons to work out and come to terms with.

"It's…well, I don't really know. I guess…he's just the _one_, you know?" She said. He nodded. "And, to be perfectly honest, I've never been all that great in relationships myself. In fact, if you really must know, Lucas was the first guy I'd ever really given a rat's ass about…"

"Ah, and giving a rat's ass is important, I see." He teased.

"_Very_." She lamented. "I think I may have really screwed things up this time…" Brooke looked down, mercilessly. "Wait, the meter's not still running, right?"

"No, no, I shut it off when we parked. _But_, feel free to tip _generously_ for my brilliant advice."

His comedic efforts succeeded to some degree, causing her to let out a brief bout of laughter. Though, it soon subsided.

"I just _don't_ get it… why am I so _sad? _I'm _so_ young and there's this _great_ thing that's happening for me right now, and all I can think about is…Lucas." She choked the last part out.

"Oh jeez…don't cry, please, don't cry." He pleaded. "When my daughter cries, I cry, and trust me we both end up regretting it." That got another laugh out of Brooke, which for the time being halted any tears. "You have a whole life ahead of you, you know?"

"So, what're you saying? I shouldn't rush it? That I can be a fashion designer when I grow up, instead of _being_ one tomorrow?"

"No, I'm actually saying the opposite." He proposed. "See, time passes you _by_, young lady. You have to start making it great _right_ now. My life would be very different if I would have had the chance you've been given."

"Maybe you're right…"

"Of course I'm right! Put it this way: would you rather drive a cab or design clothes?"

"I see your point." She replied, smiling genuinely for the first time. "Thank you so much, Daoud. And good luck with your daughter and everything…I have a feeling she's got a good head on her shoulders, thanks to you. Plus, the outfits really aren't too bad, trust me." She grabbed a wad of cash from her purse, three times what the meter showed and handed it to him with a wink.

"You have a very generous heart, Brooke Davis."

The modest brunette smiled at his kind words, about to shut the door when it hit her: she never got the full story.

"Hey, what happens in that song?" She quickly turned and asked. "The one about the girl torn between two lovers."

"Oh, there's much happiness…" This time it was Daoud who gave the wink. "I assure you."

Brooke entered the grand Waldorf Astoria Hotel with a revitalized confidence and zeal for life. The sight of the lobby, which immediately met her eager eyes, could only be described as magnificent; it was by far the most fabulous place she had ever seen. The décor was glamorous, yet refined and sophisticated; uniform clad bellmen scurried around effortlessly, politely nodding to each and every guest. The tourist in Brooke got the best of her, despite her better efforts to disguise the gaping, almost salivating response she was exhibiting. Following each new step she took there was an equally if not more impressive feature; the pinnacle being when she reached the center of the building.

She reveled at the incredible historic surroundings; it was as though she had entered the set of The Great Gatsby or something of similar gilded age resemblance. Flanking the sides were large, round, red velvet settees and directly in front of her stood an intricately carved, gold-embossed clock. Beneath her the marble flooring glistened with astonishing luminosity and above her the stunning designs of the expansive ceiling stretched on beyond her gaze. If it hadn't been for Haley, who interrupted the moment by enthusiastically running up to greet her, Brooke may have stood in awe all night.

"Oh my gosh! This is where you stay?" Brooke squealed in delight, as the two friends made their way towards the elevator. "This place is totally unbelievable…"

"I know, right?" Haley responded, a tad awe struck herself. "Expensive too. All compliments of Chris Kellar though…he can be quite the primadonna when it comes to living arrangements."

"Ahh, so the insect does have some redeeming qualities." Brooke contended.

"Yes, I guess you would see it that way." Haley agreed.

"Wait, you don't share a room with him do you?"

"No, no…we each have our own rooms, don't worry." The sandy blonde assured, shaking her head and laughing at the relieved look on Brooke's face.

By then the girls had reached Haley's room. Brooke threw down her alarmingly heavy bag, darted over to one of the beds and fell back onto it. "Now that's what I call 'fit for a queen'!" She exhaled, finally sitting back up.

"So…anything new?" Haley asked curiously, now sitting at Brooke's side. "Other than the fact that you are going to be a famous designer?" She smiled widely but was taken off guard when she did receive the same joyful response in return. "Brooke? Is everything alright?"

"Yeah." Brooke replied quietly, trying to appear convincing. "I'm just nervous I guess."

Haley nodded passively. Though she wasn't the slightest bit fooled by Brooke's evasiveness she realized that there was no sense in digging any further; therefore, she conceded for the night and just left it at: "I know you'll do great."

…

After lying in bed restlessly for some time Brooke sat up frustrated and turned on the lamp. The flash of light startled Haley and forced her to wake up. Rubbing her eyes and reaching for her eyeglasses, she tried to focus; yet, before she could, Brooke had already gotten up and started pacing around the room.

_**…It's not OK to make you wait**_

_**To make you wonder why I**_

_**Can't hold you close, can't give you hope**_

_**That this will be alright**_

_**I wanna make it right…**_

"So obviously, I'm not fine." Brooke stammered. "I lied…sue me. I just, I'm just…confused. I messed up big time and well, so did he…a lot, but what I did…it's just unfixable. Booze and broken hearts are not a good combo, trust me on that one, retired, tutor girl." She paused briefly. "It's just… after Lucas and I broke up, I was so lost. You were gone; Nathan was devastated. Then, the whole accident thing happened, the truth about Parker came out, Keith and Karen's wedding, the road trip and that damn Rachel box…and then out of the blue, right before I left today…he kissed me. And the worst part is: we'd been doing so great. You know, being friends."

"Whoa." Haley interjected. "Slow down. You lost me there at the end...after the accident."

Brooke took a deep breath and mentally retraced the events before starting to fill her friend in on the parts that she had missed. "I finally understand how you must have felt when you had to choose between the tour and Nathan." She concluded. "Do you think you made the right choice?"

"Umm…well, what does this tell you?" Haley asked, lifting up her shirt and pointing to the '23' tattooed on the small of her back.

"Wow! When did you get that?"

"A while back. It was kinda my way of keeping him close. I know, doesn't it seem so juvenile and insignificant now?"

"Haley, I'm so sorry…" Brooke whispered, regretfully, until Haley shooed her apologies away. "Has he seen it?"

"No. And I don't want him to, or Lucas for that matter, so keep your lips zipped!"

"Your secret's safe with me but…just so you know, he never stopped loving you; he still does. He's just convinced that you moved on without him."

Haley smiled sadly. "Look, all I can say is this: don't let fear dictate your happiness… follow your heart; don't run away from it…take chances and learn to forgive the mistakes… and, most importantly, believe in love. The day you start thinking that love is overrated is the day that you're wrong. The only thing wrong with love and faith and belief is not having it."

Brooke gently placed her hand on Haley's shoulder. "You're right." She sighed. "People who are meant to be always find their way in the end…"

With that Brooke silently returned to her bed and slipped herself under the covers. "When did you get so…poetic?" She asked.

"Oh please…you think I could have stayed best-friends with Lucas for this long without picking up a thing or two?"

The two girls laughed in agreement. Not long after they both fell sound asleep.

…

Brooke and Haley spent the following morning getting ready for their respective commitments. It was a huge day for both of them; however, their true tests were to come after, when they would be forced to confront Lucas and Nathan.

Taking a few minutes to calm herself down, Brooke thumbed through the pages of Cynthia Heimel's "Lower Manhattan Survival Tactics." She had picked it up on her way to the show as a souvenir and had been quite impressed with it, so far. One quote that seemed to particularly speak to her situation read: _"When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap…" _Listening to the roar of the crowd before her, Brooke slowly walked onto the stage to present her line.

Meanwhile, on their way to New York, Nathan demanded control of wheel, his way of taking control. Sitting shotgun, Lucas used a plethora of literary remarks to convince his younger brother that this trip was, in essence, a necessary means of survival. "'This nation was built by men who took risks - pioneers who were not afraid of the wilderness, business men who were not afraid of failure, scientists who were not afraid of the truth, thinkers who were not afraid of progress, dreamers who were not afraid of action.'" He affirmed, appearing as though he would continue with the colloquiums if need be.

To avoid this, Nathan was forced to give in but, he still wanted to mess with Lucas a while before he officially surrender. So, he played along. "Which lameass president spoke those words before sending America off to war?" He scoffed.

"Brooks Atkinson." Lucas paused. "He was actually just a theatre critic, no president, but the _Times_ called him 'the most important reviewer of his time.'"

"Oh, well in that case…did he say anything about jumping off a bridge?" Nathan joked. Lucas eyed him with authority, reminding him of the bet…and the wager: no questions asked. "Alright, you win. I was only kidding anyway. After all, 'you'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take,' right?" He smiled, confidently, slyly adding in his own sentiment, well kind of. "Wayne Gretzky…now that's somebody who knew what they were talking about."

By the time the two brothers had finished their little back and forth battle of wits, they had reached New York City. After parking the car Lucas and Nathan both wished each other good luck and proceeded on their separate ways. As they had the pleasure of planning out on the drive up, Lucas was to surprise Brooke at Rogue Vogue and Nathan would do the same for Haley at her concert.

…

Nathan rushed by the security guard, not wanting to miss Haley's performance. Out of breath, he stood front and center, watching how beautiful she was. Behind the masses of fans, it would have been nearly impossible for the singer to notice him there; yet, despite those odds his presence seemed to relax her.

Her lyrics flowed for the first time in weeks. Even more surprising, she was able to adlib towards the end. Chris also recognized the change in her behavior. Though, at that point, he was too unaware of who was in attendance. As a special thank you to the audience and an unofficial acknowledgment of newfound growth Haley returned to the stage for one last solo.

"Thank ya'll for coming!" She spoke graciously into the microphone, after concluding her song. "You know, Bette Midler once said: 'it's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It is the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live.' Don't ever forget than now… we love you New York!" She yelled, while blowing a kiss into the crowd.

She then turned to walk off, greeted by a familiar yet startling face. "Nathan!" She cried, practically jumping off the stage as she lunged towards him out of reflex.

…

Brooke stood timidly against the wall, waiting for her turn to step on stage. Unlike the other designers, who had tons of support, she was there all alone. This fact was only solidified by the realization that she would have to self-introduce her line. While she remained slightly hopeful that her mother would show up at the last minute, it was looking more and more like that invitation would be declined.

"And, now let's give it up for…" The host, Anya, announced frantically looking to see who was approaching. "Oh, that's an interesting move," she snidely remarked, catching herself off guard, "oops, sorry, without further ado please welcome Ms. Davis, our next designer, who will be representing herself."

Brooke looked down embarrassedly, trying her best not to break stride as she took the microphone from Anya. "Hello…" She smiled stiffly, putting on her bravest face possible; even though, deep inside she hadn't felt this abandoned since sophomore year when neither parent had shown up to see her take over as varsity cheerleading captain. It was as if she were being stabbed all over again. Only this time, she didn't have Peyton to step in.

"Wait!" A man's breathless voice sounded from the corner. He was now walking and talking as he stepped on stage. Instinctively he took the microphone from Brooke, who stepped aside, beyond speechless.

…_**Before I lose you, love…**_

"My name is Lucas Scott." He began. "I'm sorry to interrupt…but, this beautiful and equally brilliant and talented young woman standing next to me deserved a proper introduction. So, here you have it: the moment I laid eyes on her, and more importantly her amazing work, I knew she would be a star. I knew she would change the world someday, and I knew she was either too naïve to know or too modest to say it. Either way, her vision for 'Clothes Over Bros' has something that so many designers these days lack: _heart_." He paused, looking directly at Brooke. "Now, with great honor, I present to you: Clothes Over Bro's by Brooke Davis." He leaned closer and whispered the rest. "the girl I love…"

* * *

_*****Lyrics for this Chapter are from "Gotta Figure This Out," by Erin McCarley*****_

**A/N: Okay, so I decided to leave things a bit more up in the air this chapter. I have an idea of what I'm planning for the next one but please review. If you want more Brucas next Ch. will surely do them justice. They've definitely got some much awaited, passionate moments coming up! Thanks again!**


	17. Rain

**All Those Years Ago**

**

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I do not claim to own any of these characters. All rights are reserved to Mark Schwann, the CW, and the hideous depiction of OTH that we are faced with today.

**A/N: **So, here is the big Brucas/Naley reunion chapter. I hope this does justice to the wait I forced upon all of you faithful readers. I know my updates have been disappointing as of late. I had some personal things—found out I had to have surgery on my other hip, thus had to take a temporary position in retail (which nearly killed me) etc. Basically, when I wasn't working I was eating or sleeping. I've got a month before the surgery, and having had to quit due to medical reasons, I'm much more at ease. I'll be taking this time to catch up on my reading, as well as writing…so please review. I'd really like to know where you see this story going bc my outline is definitely in flux right now. Recommendations are welcome. HUGS!

* * *

**Rain**

…_**I feel it, it's coming  
Rain, feel it on my finger tips  
Hear it on my window pane  
Your love's coming down like  
Rain, wash away my sorrow  
Take away my pain  
Your love's coming down like rain…  
**_

Brooke stood in amazement, taking in the words that Lucas had just whispered in her ear. It was hard to imagine that this was the same guy who nearly broken her heart three months ago. Today, he seemed absolutely perfect.

_What the hell!_ She thought to herself, taking a front row seat. _If only Duaod could see him now…_

The budding designer then shifted gears, focusing her attention onto the model that had just appeared on stage. This was it, her time to shine. The model, who Brooke had purposely picked out because of her resemblance to Peyton, was wearing a white, fitted cotton tee, a distressed pinstripe vest, a pair of cut out jeans, and badass, black high-heeled boots. The look was supposed to express: "I can take on the world…"

_**  
…When your lips are burning mine  
And you take the time to tell me how you feel  
When you listen to my words  
And I know you've heard, I know it's real…**_

Brooke proudly watched as the rest of her line streamed up and down the runway. Having Lucas by her side was a huge comfort. At that point it didn't even matter if she would win or not. She was happy and content.

"Okay, well that was our last show." The announcer told the audience. "Let's give a round of applause for all the lovely designers." She paused allowing for a long acknowledgment. "Just a reminder, folks, we'll be announcing the winner of the Fashion Institute of New York's Apprenticeship at this evenings banquet. Good luck future fashionistas!"

With that Lucas and Brooke excused themselves.

…

Backstage the two long lost lovers stood face to face for the first time in months. Haley was still examining Nathan for any outward reaction to her jumping into his arms only minutes earlier. Unfortunately for her his expression was still indecipherable.

Things weren't simple or easy anymore. Something had come between the two of them; and because of that, for their own personal reasons, they both felt a significant amount of regret.

Instead of speaking, Haley forced out a smile, hoping to ease the tension. Her actions when seeing Nathan had been out of pure impulse. The excitement of him being there had taken control over her and in that moment she had reached out as if nothing had happened. Yet, as they now walked the streets in silence, she was beginning to feel as though her advances had been perceived as inappropriate. She feared, despite what Brooke had confirmed or what she felt in her heart, that he no longer shared her feelings.

On the contrary, Nathan very much felt the same. He was fighting those very same insecurities. In fact, he had come to New York with every intention of revealing his intentions and setting the record straight. Still, it's always easier said than done.

"So, what are you thinking about?" He finally asked.

_**  
…When you looked into my eyes  
And you said goodbye could you see my tears  
When I turned the other way  
Did you hear me say  
I'd wait for all the dark clouds bursting in a perfect sky  
You promised me when you said goodbye  
That you'd return when the storm was done  
And now I'll wait for the light, I'll wait for the sun  
Till I feel your…**_

Haley stopped and looked up to the sky. "Nothing." She sighed, disappointedly. "Just praying for rain."

…

Lucas and Brooke decided to grab something to eat before the big awards ceremony. After walking through the bustling streets of Manhattan they made there way to a very fancy restaurant. It was the kind of place you would see in an old Hollywood movie, and Brooke had no problem playing the "Bacall" to Lucas's undeniable "Bogie."

Once inside, there wasn't much time to take in the surroundings. The two were quickly ushered off toward a cozy corner table, directly across from the fireplace. After being seated, it didn't take much longer for the conversation to turn from small talk to more important matters.

"Look at this." Lucas instructed, pulling out a velvet box from his coat pocket and handing it to her.

"Lucas!" She shrieked, opening it up to find a glistening diamond ring. "Have you lost your mind?" She whispered, half giggling.

The broody blonde chuckled back. "Don't worry, it's not for you. Cooper gave it to me to have re-sized. He's planning on proposing to Rachel on her birthday. Crazy huh?"

"Yes." Brooke gasped, truly surprised by the gesture.

Little did she know, her response had been so convincing that the young waitress walking by believed that she had just agreed to marry Lucas.

"Well, well, congratulations!" The concierge shouted, after being told the exciting news.

"Oh, no." Brooke shook her head, waving her hands up in protest.

"Champagne on the house…we have an engagement!" He gestured a round of cheers from the other guests.

"No…" She began to explain, until hearing the free champagne part. "Champagne on the house?" She repeated to Lucas, mischievously, slipping on the ring and kinking her eyebrow to signal that the opportunity was impossible to pass up.

…_**Here comes the sun, here comes the sun  
And I say, never go away…  
**_

Brooke turned on her acting chops and held the ring up for all to see. Lucas joined in on the ruse, grabbing her outstretched hand, which he immediately graced with an affectionate kiss. The entire restaurant erupted in congratulatory applause along with the usual ooh's and ahh's. The imposter fiancés smiled out of gratitude, toasted to themselves and continued on with their meal.

…

By the time Lucas and Brooke had finished eating their dessert, also compliments of the whole engagement façade, it was dark outside. Having already polished off three bottles of champagne, they soon realized, even if they could make it in time, they were in no shape to go to the Rogue Vogue ceremony.

"I'm so sorry." Lucas apologized, lifting up her chin with his index finger so that she would be looking into his eyes. "I should have paid more attention to the time…we were just having so much…f—"

"Fun?" Brooke finished his sentence with a sigh. "It's not your fault, Luke, really. I wouldn't have even been here if it wasn't for you, remember?" She assured him with a quick nudge.

Lucas smiled adoringly. "You know, I meant what I said earlier."

Brooke nodded, shifting around uncomfortably as she recalled his words from that afternoon.

"_I'm sorry to interrupt…but, this beautiful and equally brilliant, talented young woman standing next to me deserved a proper introduction. So, here you have it: the moment I laid eyes on her, and more importantly her amazing work, I knew she would be a star. I knew she would change the world someday, and I knew she was either too naïve to know or too modest to say it. Either way, her vision for 'Clothes Over Bros' has something that so many designers these days lack: heart. Now, with great honor, I present to you: Clothes Over Bro's by Brooke Davis…" _

His words were poetic and heartfelt and everything she would have once deemed herself unworthy of. Yet, in this case, she had somehow believed in it, believed in him…even the last bit:

"_The girl I love…"_

Perhaps that fact scared her the most. In front of her was a man that loved her, a man who she undeniably loved in return. Would she risk the pain of losing him or that feeling he brought to her life? Could she?

…_**Waiting is the hardest thing  
It's strange I feel like I've known you before  
I tell myself that if I believe in you  
And I want to understand you  
In the dream of you  
More and more  
With all my heart and all my soul…**_

Noticing Brooke's timid disposition, Lucas pressed the subject no further. Instead he simply suggested that they take advantage of the city life in front of them, by taking a walk.

"We can be spontaneous?" He added, uncharacteristically, with a grin.

Unable to deny his very "clever" tricks, Brooke pushed aside her unmentionable fears and obliged the offer. "Okay…where to?"

"Anywhere you want…you're the boss!"

Brooke paused for a second to consider their next move. At the same time, almost magically, a horse drawn carriage appeared before them.

"Can I give you two a ride?" The older gentleman pulled back on the reins to ask.

"Why not, after all, it is our engagement night." Lucas agreed, walking towards the curb.

"_Lucas_…" Brooke hissed under her breath, pulling him back in protest. "I thought I was the boss!"

"You sure you know what you're getting yourself into son?" The driver teased. "She's a handful, I see."

Insulted by his comment, Brooke quickly lifted her hand, displaying the diamond band on her ring finger as evidence.

"In that case, the ride's on me."

"See, it's perfect!" Lucas insisted. "Plus, I thought we were being spontaneous tonight?" He silenced her with a wink while boosting her up into the carriage.

"Oh _you_ are bad…" She growled playfully into his ear, once he had taken his seat beside her.

"And we're off…" The carriage owner announced.

"I guess I have always wanted to ride in one of these!" Brooke admitted.

"Glad to be of service, mamn." The man replied. "Just sit back and enjoy the ride…"

"A diamond ring is like…_gold_!" She squealed softly, so that only Lucas would hear. The two smiled in agreement.

The carriage then approached a series of famous landmarks…Times Square, Broadway and the Empire State Building, all of which served as an easy distraction.

"So what do you two have planned for your life together?" The driver interrupted their sightseeing to ask.

Startled by the question, Brooke and Lucas nervously eyed each other before attempting to answer the best way they knew how: lie.

"Um, well…we're going to be a power couple." Brooke declared. "He's going to be a famous novelist and I'm going to have a fabulous fashion line."

"But we're still going to have time to have a big family." Lucas promised.

"Of course, two boys and a girl." She predicted, effortlessly.

"And I'll coach little league."

"Ooh and I'll bake treats for the team…" Brooke imagined her future role as a mother. "Or buy them." She corrected, knowing that she was less than adept in the kitchen.

"Then we'll spend our summers in our beach house." Lucas went on to say.

"And winters in the south of France."

"It won't matter where we are as long as we're together." They confirmed without hesitation.

"That's the key." The carriage driver professed, nodding his head in agreement. "Success is wonderful, but finding someone to love and having them love you back…_love_ is what it's all about."

With that, Brooke and Lucas lowered their heads in unison, conflicted with what had just happened. It was clear: they shared the type of connection that most people could only dream of; being together was truly more natural than anything else. Still, hearing that man speak of love, their love, in such a profound way was surprisingly upsetting to them. They weren't technically a couple, let alone engaged; yet, they had envisioned a future together and described a full-on fairytale love story without even realizing it.

In the back of their minds they were both wondering if they were frauds, born to be actors…or soul mates in serious denial.

…

After a few too many complimentary drinks, Brooke and Lucas finally made their way back to the hotel and stumbled to his room. To their surprise Nathan was nowhere to be found, which was a good sign for him in Lucas's opinion.

"Alright Boozy… Let's get you to bed." Brooke instructed. "Come on." She insisted, pulling him onto the bed.

"The bed is spinning." Lucas complained. "Come sit with me?"

"It'll be spinning for me too!" She giggled a bit. "Listen, you're going to be okay. I'm gonna get you into some jammies and then find my way back to my own room so that you can sleep it off."

Her words stung him with increasing intensity. Memories of the other afternoon flashed before him and he was instantly reminded of their last kiss.

Unfazed by his inner thoughts, Brooke continued to carefully unbutton his shirt. Still, even she was not immune to the temptation. In fact, for a young lady as sexually uninhibited as she was, this was borderline torture.

Caught in the moment and taken over by his emotions, Lucas pulled her forward. Her body was now directly on top of his. Their breathing was heavy but in sync as he cupped her head and kissed her. This time neither of them resisted. They fell right back into step, engulfing one another in passions long deprived, until Lucas uttered: "be mine forever."

While the thought seemed appropriate and genuine, the reception was far from ordinary. After hearing him say it Brooke angrily shot up from the bed and hurried to get her things.

"Wait!" Lucas pleaded. "What'd I say wrong?"

"You really are that clueless aren't you?" She shook her head. "Be mine forever?"

"Yea…I thought it sounded good at the time. Clearly I was wrong?"

"No, it sounds great." Brooke corrected.

"Then I don't get it…"

"It sounded even better when I read it the first time – in a certain letter you wrote – to _Rachel_!"

Lucas's eye's dropped to the floor. Brooke was right. It was wrong of him to compare anything, even an unknowingly identical salutation. Even so, to exhibit that amount of rage, there had to be something else bothering her.

Desperate for answers Lucas continued to ponder. His brief hiatus was enough for Brooke to seize the opportunity and escape. In a matter of seconds she had snatched up her belongings, wrenched off the ring – intended for Rachel – and stormed out of the room. As soon as her foot had hit the hallway carpet, tears filled in her eyes.

…

Outside, the beautiful and calm March evening that they had left only minutes earlier had turned into a vicious rainstorm. It was actually rather fitting, considering the turn of events. Whichever way Brooke was never one to be concerned with hazardous conditions. She relentlessly forged her way through the mix of wind and rain, until she was so far deep that she couldn't see anything ahead.

"Stop!" She heard the muffled voice of Lucas behind her, causing her to pause. "This is ridiculous!"

"Ridiculous?" She blurted back. "Ridiculous is finding that letter in your sad-box to Rachel, in your freaking glove compartment! Dear Rachel, blah blah blah, be mine forever, love Lucas! Ridiculous is hearing those exact same words come out of your mouth tonight!"

"I don't even remember writing that!"

"Well you did! And I doubt you were drunk when you wrote it!

"Brooke." He begged, grabbing hold of her arm. "I am sorry…it was a mistake."

_A mistake_. Brooke thought. _Yea, I know all about mistakes. I am the Queen of Mistakeland. But Lucas, no, he doesn't make mistakes…_

"Which time? Which time was the mistake...me or Rachel?"

"You know, you were the one who was snooping through my things!"

"Nice try but so not the point right now…and just so you know: I am not your recycling bin!" Brooke huffed, stalking off again.

Lucas followed. "No, you're psychotic!"

"_Ugh_…unbelievable." She scoffed, stomping away once more, determined to get away from him.

In spite of her best efforts, Lucas caught up with her. "Brooke, I'm sorry I said that. You're not psychotic. I mean, a little disturbed, maybe." He grinned.

"You think this is _funny_?" She asked, painfully.

"Know what I think? I think you're trying to _sabotage_ us. Find _any_ reason you can to avoid it. That way you won't have to worry about ever getting hurt again."

It was at that point when she realized her secret could no longer be kept from him. It was just too hard to continue punishing herself and him for what it had been: _a mistake_. Everyone makes mistakes; she knew that. And perhaps he was right: she was scared to be hurt again. Who wouldn't be?

"Just tell me, _why_ me this time? Why _not _Rachel?"

"Aside from the fact that she's in love with another man—the one who plans to marry her…" Lucas started to joke, but soon realized after one glare that Brooke was in no mood for his candidness. "Look I can't say anything bad about Rachel. Okay. She's my friend, and the truth is, I care about her…"

"Then _what_ is the difference?"

"The difference… the difference is I love you, Brooke. I wanna be with you, not Rachel…not anyone else."

Underneath all the layers of Brooke Davis, at the very core of her being, there was a faulty belief system. It had been there for years, tucked away. But, unsuspectingly, with his words, it was unleashed. Her anger ebbed away and a more complicated emotion filled in its place: _fear. _You see, Brooke Davis was never scared to be hurt…she expected it actually. But to be loved…whole-heartedly, unconditionally…that was something she had found herself unworthy of a long time ago.

…_**When I'm with you  
That by sheer force of will  
I feel like a magical child  
I will raise you from the ground  
Everything strange  
And without a sound you'll appear  
Everything wild  
And surrender to me, to love…**_

"Well, I slept with someone…" She cried out, feeling a rush of relief stream off of her, before lowering her head in remorse.

"Okay…" Lucas choked out, trying his best to react as calmly as possible. "Not exactly the response I was going for, but…"

"It was a long time ago…after we broke up…we were drunk, upset, it was stupid." Brooke interrupted, regretfully. "It was a _mistake_. I don't know what else to say other than I'm _so_ sorry. I guess a part of me wanted to blame you, or blame Rachel because _I_ was afraid. I was afraid of you and the way that you make me feel." Stopping to catch her breath she looked up at him, waving her hands in protest when he reached out to console her. "None of that matters anymore. What I did was _unforgivable_. I don't deserve you Luke, I never have. So just please don't make this any harder than it already is."

"No." Lucas stated. "What you did, I forgive you."

"You can't!"

"I just did." He smiled. "Deal with it…"

"Are you crazy?" Brooke laughed, still crying.

"Crazy about you." He leaned closer to her. "I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis…and I know I hurt you last time we were together but—

"I love you." Brooke broke in.

"I love you too, Pretty Girl." He touched her face gingerly. "That's what I've been trying to say all along. Now, can we please go back inside? We're both gonna catch pneumonia."

"Good idea…Boyfriend."

Lucas hesitated briefly, taking in the moment.

"What?" Brooke asked, impatiently, assuming she had gone to far with the last part.

"Nothing, it just feels good to hear you call me boyfriend." He responded, easing her fears.

"Feels good to say it. Now, whatdya say we get out of these wet clothes and finish what we started earlier?" She winked, grabbing his hand to lead them back to the hotel.

This time there was no hesitation.

…

After walking for quite some time Nathan and Haley decided to stop and sit. For a while neither of them moved; they just sat patiently, waiting for the other to make the first move. It was excruciating for Haley. In the past Nathan had always been so chivalrous, or at least very charming in his own cocky way. She missed his desire to impress her, that "I want to undress you" look in his eyes.

He, on the other hand, was ashamed. Ashamed to have assumed that she was incapable of keeping her word, ashamed that he had succumbed under pressure, but mostly he was ashamed that he still hadn't proved to be man enough to deserve her. In his eyes Haley was the epitome of perfection, the only symbol of completeness in his life.

Desperate to understand his murky feelings, Haley inched closer and kissed him. To her disappointment he gently refused.

"Look, I'm sorry. I just don't want to push you." He claimed, scooting farther away to create distance.

"You're not." Haley protested. "I kissed you…"

"But I am." He paused. "Haley, you got a tattoo for god sakes."

Haley's face turned bright red. "You saw that? Oh my god, I'm gonna puke."

Nathan chuckled to himself. "Relax, it just freaked me out a little bit. I mean, obviously this whole thing with us means, or meant, a lot to you. And, I just don't want to do anything to pressure you. Or drive you away. Even though sometimes I can't help it."

_He thinks I left because of him?_ Haley thought to herself, realizing now that he had blamed himself for her absence.

…_**Rain is what the thunder brings  
For the first time I can hear my heart sing  
Call me a fool but I know I'm not  
I'm gonna stand out here on the mountain top  
Till I feel your…**_

"I'm not perfect." He finished.

"Neither am I…" She added, confused by his remark.

"Well you are to me." He silenced her, before being interrupted by the rain droplet that had just pierced his face. "And, I can't help that I fell in love with you. Cause I did and I do. I love you, Haley. It scares me, a little bit, okay maybe a lot…but there it is."

…_**Rain, I feel it, it's coming  
Your love's coming down like…**_

"Wow. There it is." Haley smiled, looking up at the sky thankfully, as the rain now poured down on them evenly. "I love you too." She whispered softly while pressing her lips to his. "And, I want you to know that leaving Tree Hill, that was all on me. So don't you dare think that you pushed me away. I just…wasn't ready to admit that what I felt for you was real. But, I guess I can't really help it if I found the guy I wanna be with my first time out."

"True." Nathan replied, cockily. "I am pretty irresistible."

Taking advantage of the moment, Nathan wrapped her in his arms and placed her on the grassy knoll a mere feet away from where they had been sitting. He crouched down next to her, still holding her waist, caressing the small of her back. Lucky for the two of them not a soul was in sight.

…_**Rain…**_

"I could love you forever." Nathan promised, kissing Haley's neck.

"So could I…" She replied, enjoying his advances.

"So why can't forever start today?"

…

Before falling asleep that night Brooke, Nathan, Haley and Lucas pondered amongst themselves.

_You know what I think?_ Brooke thought. _I think your soulmate is someone who brings out the best in you. Sure, they won't be perfect, and mistakes will most certainly be made. But, the bottom line is: people are never perfect; but love…love can be. _

_You see,_ Haley reassured herself. _As Sam Keen once wrote: "we come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."_

_And, I dunno._ Nathan wondered. _Maybe our greatest mistake is that we waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love._

_Being in love is hard, it's scary and it's pretty amazing at the same time._ Lucas reminded himself. _After all, Lewis B. Smedes believed: "forgiving is love's toughest work, and love's biggest risk…our sense of fairness tells us people should pay for the wrong they do. But forgiving is love's power to break nature's rule_."

That night, out of grace and fortitude, a great truth was proven: when soulmates reunite, the best in them surfaces…through forgiveness –love's greatest act of kindness—past mistakes may be forgotten and, most importantly, in the end the power of true love always prevails.

* * *

_*****The lyrics for this chapter are from "Rain," by Madonna*****_

**A/N: Soooooo, what did you think? **


	18. Angels on the Moon

**All Those Years Ago**

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters--they are the property of Mark Schwann.

A/N: I'm back. I hope you'll all forgive me for the hiatus. This chapter is not momentous but it is sweet for BL and important down the road for NH. I hope you enjoy it. I'll be shortening my chapters from now on--hopefully--trying to get the updates out faster. I know I've been cruel!lol Anyways, thanks so much for staying with me and to those of you that have been so kind to review, know that it's all for you! Hugs.

* * *

**Angels on the Moon**

…_**Do you dream**_

_**That the world will know your name**_

_**So tell me your name**_

_**And do you care about all the little things**_

_**Or anything at all**_

_**I wanna feel, all the chemicals inside,**_

_**I wanna feel.**_

_**I wanna sunburn, just to know that I'm alive**_

_**To know I'm alive…**_

The next morning seemed to come upon them without a pause. At present, the sun was up and shining, birds were chirping harmoniously, and Brooke had conveniently nestled herself into the nook of Lucas's arm. While the act really did please the broody blonde, it also made it incredibly hard for him to escape without disturbing her sleep.

One of the things Lucas absolutely loved about Brooke was her serenity when resting. There was something in her presence that never failed to remind him of a child—innocence at its purest. He wouldn't have dared risk the chance of losing that moment. Instead, he waited patiently, periodically looking down to trace the soft curves of her arm.

Outside, in contrast to the night before, things were rather calm--much like he and Brooke were now. In many ways that coincidence felt unreal, too good to be true. In fact, if he could have moved his arm he would have pinched himself to be sure he wasn't dreaming.

_It feels real_…_then again; it felt real when I was in the hospital, too! _He thought, while playing back the last conversation he had had with Peyton's ghost--or whatever she was.

"_Promise me something…Promise me you won't make the same mistake I did, promise me you won't __ever__ give up on her, Luke; that you'll fight like hell for her…because if you go back there's still gonna be tough times ahead; some heartache. But you're getting a second chance and, in the end she's worth it; __happiness__ and __love__ are worth it. Don't ever forget that; don't ever lose hope. Just remember, this is Brooke we're talking about; you know as well as I do, she's gonna be scared…letting you in, again, it won't be easy for her. So, you're gonna have to be patient and give her time. She'll come around."_

Lucas smiled, shook the memory out of his mind and softly spoke aloud. It was ironic, almost frightening, how accurate Peyton's advice had been.

"I promise," he whispered, gazing down onto Brooke and then up, symbolically addressing Peyton.

"Promise what?" Brooke groggily asked, slowly lifting her head.

"Nothing really…just something I've been meaning to say." He replied, amorously.

"Hmm." Brooke quietly wondered what he might have meant. Her face scrunched out of confusion. "So…" she started to press the subject further, stopping mid breath once her eyes met Lucas's.

It was in that moment when she realized: none of the insignificant details mattered. She was happy; they were happy and that is what was important.

_If he wants to promise imaginary things, so be it._ She thought. _Who am I to stop him or question it? I mean that's what makes him, him…fiercely committed, disturbingly romantic, and amazingly selfless…yep, I was right: he's a unicorn!_

"Never mind." She smiled, shocking Lucas with her lack of probing.

"You sure you're feeling okay?" He teased, touching her forehead as if he were checking her temperature. "Cuz, ya know, Brooke Davis doesn't usually let things go so easily…"

"Well maybe Brooke Davis realized she needed to trust people more often?" She smirked, wiggling out of his arms.

"Oh, did she?" Lucas asked playfully, getting ready to pin her down.

"_Maybe_…" Brooke reminded him. "My guess is that it's a trial run…"

"So, in other words: don't fuck it up?"

"Exactly."

"Well, I've heard that Lucas Scott is very trustworthy guy…"

"Yea?" Brooke defiantly flipped herself on top of him, straddling him and holding his wrists down, which he gladly allowed her to do. "I hope so."

Up until that point, Lucas had been under the impression that they had made it through the storm: literally and figuratively. However, hearing her last words, he couldn't help but sense a certain hesitation or apprehension in Brooke's voice. It was clear that she still had some reservations regarding his feelings. He wanted to ease those fears. He just didn't know how, yet.

…

Startled by a knock at the door, Haley jumped up, grabbed her shorts and attempted to spruce herself up before looking through the peephole.

_Lucas!?!_ She shrieked to herself. _How the heck does he know what room I'm in? Oh, duh…this is their room!_

"I know you're in there, Haley. I can see your eyeball." Lucas deadpanned.

"Uh just gimme a second. K?"

In an attempt to conceal the evidence of last night's rendezvous, Haley frantically swept threw the room, shoving anything she found suspicious into the drawers. Meanwhile, Nathan was still sprawled out on the bed, wearing only his boxers, and Lucas was getting more impatient by the minute.

Haley had three options: 1) wake Nathan up, demand he hide--though, in light of his heavy snoring that option seemed unlikely, 2) cover him up with blankets and pray that Lucas didn't get too close--which also seemed unlikely, the man snored like a horse, or 3) keep him as he is and risk the wrath of Lucas Scott.

_**Do you believe, in the day that you were born**_

_**Tell me, do you believe**_

_**And do you know, that every day's the first**_

_**Of the rest, -- of -- your life.**_

For whatever reason Haley chose option number three. Perhaps, in retrospect, that was her way of displaying independence. Regardless, after a short but pleasant greeting, the events that followed occurred exactly as she expected: poorly.

From the moment Lucas had laid eyes on Nathan, Haley could feel his anger. Worse, she could feel his disappointment. Still, she wasn't feeling either of those emotions and when it came down to it, it was her decision to make.

_Damn sometimes he is worse than my parents!_ She thought, waiting for him to say something. _You know, now that I'm thinking about it, he is worse. My mom would have probably handed me a condom, my dad would have pretended not to know…they might have gone to smoke a joint in the garage—I can't believe they still think I'm oblivious to that. Ugh, but Lucas, no…he's too proud for that!_

"Say it." Haley finally broke down and demanded. "I know you want to."

"Haley! It's cool, I just, I thought you weren't ready. I thought that

you were going to wait until you got married. I mean, I just figured, I didn't expect you to-

"To what? Be with someone I love? Find the guy I want to be with forever on my first try?

"I just—you had always said…"

"We say a lot of things, but you know what: things change. She paused, walking closer to him so that she could place her hand onto his. "Life changes us. So I took a different path…I'm still the same girl, Luke…. and I'm not about to apologize for that."

"You're right." He begrudgingly agreed, before spotting a cluster of indistinguishable black ink on her back.

"What?" Haley asked, feeling again under scrutiny.

"Did you get a tattoo? Please tell me you didn't—" He turned her around, revealing the permanent "23" engraved into her back. "He branded you? Like a vampire…and you let him…what the hell is going on with you Hales?"

"Nothing." She responded coldly. "And, if you must know, I got this for me…not him. He didn't even know about it."

"Likely story." Lucas rolled his eyes.

"Because the tattoo you got with Brooke is different?" She accused, poking him in the chest. Not receiving a response this time Haley was the one rolling her eyes. "Such a double standard. And, seriously cut back on the True Blood marathons…now you're just sounding insane." She huffed, while walking away from him.

_Branding me like a vampire._ She repeated to herself. _What a joke. As if he thinks I'd be some sort of Fangbanger! I should have never mentioned my secret crush on Eric Northman to him. You know who Lucas is? He's Bill... Boring ass Bill, always scolding that poor girlfriend of his--"Sukkay." _The mental imagery sent her into a fit of laughter.

"What's so funny?" Lucas wanted to know.

"Nothing..." She giggled one last time, thinking of Lucas in a pair of hideous Dockers, and then stopped herself. "So what did ya come by for anyways?"

"Needed to get some papers from Nathan's bag."

Haley didn't respond or interrupt after that. There really wasn't much left to say and she wasn't at all in the mood for another agonizing confrontation with Lucas. Luckily, he seemed to share her feelings and left the room as soon as he found what he was looking for.

...

…_**This is for one last day in the shadows, and to know a brothers love.**_

_**This is to New York City Angels and the rivers of our blood.**_

_**This is to all of us, to all of us...**_

Their time in New York was coming to an end and it was time to say the dreaded good-byes. Since walking out of the hotel room earlier that morning, Lucas had yet to speak to Haley or Nathan. He must have realized how foolish and overbearing he had been earlier because the first thing out of his mouth was: I'm sorry.

"Luke, you've just gotta learn how to chill out a bit. You'll get your chance to be forty with bills to pay, children's mouths to feed and all that other stuff you seem to be primed and ready to take on. Right now, we're supposed to be having the time of our lives..."

"So you're 'happy' then Hales?" He questioned, maybe striking a nerve.

"Yea," she promised, doing her best to sound absolutely certain.

Deep down Haley knew that she wouldn't truly be happy until Nathan was back in her life for good. But, she couldn't just up and leave the tour without explanation either, and she didn't want to. There were alot of unknowns flying around. She just had to believe that fate would direct her one way or another.

…_**So don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know**_

_**If I can't see the sun, then maybe I should go**_

_**Don't wake me cause I'm dreamin' of angels on the moon**_

_**Where everyone you know, never leaves too soon…**_

Lucas could almost hear the tension and anxiety building up in Haley. He knew her better than anyone. What she needed right now wasn't one of his prophetic speeches. She just needed a little reassurance. So, without hesitation he grabbed her in for a hug.

"As long as you're happy..." He whispered, sliding a folded up piece of paper into the pocket of her jeans.

Haley gave him a puzzled look, wanting so badly to pull out the note and read it. If it hadn't been for the look in his eye's--the one she knew so well, which said 'wait'--her curiosity would have taken over. Instead, she honored his wishes and stood motionless as the three most important people in her life drove off without her.

...

…_**Yeah, you can tell me all your thoughts**_

_**About the stars that fill polluted skies**_

_**And show me where you run to**_

_**When no one's left to take your side**_

_**But don't tell me where the road ends**_

_**Cause I just don't wanna know**_

_**No I don't wanna know…**_

Back in Tree Hill, a blindfolded Brooke slowly walked alongside Lucas. In the distance she could hear rustlings from a group of people she didn't recognize. The brunette loved surprises, which she assumed was the very reason for this charade. It wasn't her birthday, though, and they'd only been official for not even 24 hours, so an anniversary was out of the question. Exhausted of options, she gave up trying to figure out what this was all for. Atleast, she gave up trying to do so silently.

"Where are we going?" Brooke asked, seductively. In her experience, that was the tone most men responded to best.

"Nowhere your sexy voice will get us to faster," Lucas taunted, knowing how much the suspense was killing her. "We're almost there, promise."

A few steps later Lucas stopped and untied her blindfold. There before her stood the Rivercourt. It wasn't the surprise she had been expecting. Even though, she really hadn't the slightest clue what to expect anyways. Her confused but appreciative expression amused Lucas. Trust Brooke to see the potential in any situation. And, if she didn't--like he expected she was now--she'd most definitely fake it.

"This is my world, Brooke." He laughed, trying to make his point. "Or, at least it used to be."

"I _have_ been here before, you know?" She reminded him curtly.

"I _know_,… I just never told you what this place is to me." He waited until the corners of her lips pulled up into a smile. "It's not just a court… it's where I came from, it's where I belong… it's my world."

Brooke shifted her feet nervously, wanting to ask for further clarification. A part of her reveled in the idea that he would take her along. After all, Lucas was a man more of prose than action. It felt nice to be the cause of such. Still, the other part--the side that often got the best of her--feared that he resented "her world" and thus, her.

As if he could read her mind, Lucas turned to face her. Firmly grasping her hands into his, he spoke. "Brooke, I brought you here because you are the biggest part of my world..."

She was in awe of him. It was exactly what she had needed to hear. How he knew that, she'd never know.

"You might wanna get used to slummin it." He gave her a playful nudge, smiling.

God bless him, he even knew when to cut the sentiments short.

...

That night Haley finally got the chance to examine the note Lucas had given her. It was a poem: Invictus--by William Ernest Henley. She knew it well from their earlier days. It had always been a favorite of Luke's.

_I should've known._ She thought to herself, reading it aloud. The last verse had always made her smile.

"_It matters not how strait the gate,  
How charged with punishments the scroll.  
I am the master of my fate:  
I am the captain of my soul."_

Saying those words moved something in her. Call it fate, if you will, but she now knew exactly what she wanted and just how she would get it.

* * *

_**...Lyrics in this chapter are from "Angels on the Moon," by Thriving Ivory...**_


	19. Two Become One

Disclaimer: Do not own these characters or OTH. That eventual disaster is all on Mark.

**A/N: Just want to thank everyone who has stuck with me. We're coming to the end of the backstory...answers and resolutions are on the way. Hugs!**

* * *

**Two Become One**

_**...I watch you while you're sleeping,  
Messy hair, chest bare, moonlight on your skin,  
I wanna breathe you in.  
In the silence words come easy,  
I can tell you know just how simple it's been,  
To let you in...**_

It took a little getting used to-you know, being the biggest part of Lucas Scott's world-but Brooke cherished every minute of it. The simplest moments, like having him come by her locker every morning, were the ones she looked forward to most. Having him look at her in that way again-a feeling she had missed so much-broke her heart and mended it all at the same time. She hadn't felt this good since, well...back when she and Lucas were dating the first time. There wasn't a solitary instance in her childhood that she could honestly say she'd felt as loved as she did right now. Peyton loved her, there was no question there, it just didn't measure up. Lucas not only loved her, he adored her. He filled the voids of every person in Brooke's life who had ever disappointed or abandoned her. It wasn't a quality that he purposely strived to meet. Unlike the harem of man-whores she had once liaised with, his actions weren't motivated by wanting to "get in her pants," as Brooke coined it so eloquently. He didn't even know he was doing it half the time, let alone how much it meant to her.

In turn, Brooke completed Lucas in a way that not a single person or thing in his life-not even his mother, Haley or basketball combined-would ever compare. She wasn't the tortured artist he once believed to be his soulmate. She wasn't broody, graceful with her words, or into emo music like he had always been. If you handed her a stack of books, instead of tearing into the literature, she'd tear out the pages and create a fashion masterpiece. That was Brooke; uniquely liberated, yet flawed and scarred like anyone else.

_**...Don't move, this mood is a painting,  
We'll never find the same thing.  
Love, do not make a sound,  
Nothing to me now,  
Two become one...**_

To Lucas, she would never just be: "the other half." Their love, their journey, their story...it was sacred, and somewhere along the way he came to the realization that they had always been meant for each other. Every instinct to the contrary would simply be a denial of the following truth-Brooke Davis was now and always would be "_his_ other half."

...

Since she and Nathan's reunion in New York, Haley had been doing a lot of thinking. _Was the tour where she wanted to be or would she rather be back in Tree Hill? Could she have both her music career and the relationship she wanted with Nathan? Did she want to continue juggling the two?_ All the confusion and uncertainty had been weighing in on her and getting worse day by day. Ignoring it wasn't an option anymore, considering her tour mate never missed a chance to invade her personal life. Chris Keller was an interesting fellow, but he was consistent in that respect. It was only a matter of time before she would have to start answering questions.

"So, what's the dealio?" Chris asked, true to form, strumming his guitar nonchalantly. "You seem, blue. Though right now, I'm not gonna lie, you're looking a little green."

He was oddly perceptive, that one, and in this case there was no denying it.

"Yea," Haley managed to squeak out before turning into the sink and hurling. Very classy.

"Are you sick?" He balked, cupping his hand to his face out of habit. No sense in having two messes to clean up.

"Just nerves...stress, I dunno." Haley replied, wiping the vomit off her mouth and bracing herself on the counter of the bus's mini kitchenette. It wasn't an ideal situation; however, it sure beat out the trash can she'd used the other day, after they played an afternoon show in Atlantic City. They had been right on the boardwalk; the smell of cotton candy, elephant ears and hot dogs had her feeling like a kid again, odd cravings included. Only when she was five, somehow she could handle that awful mix. At eighteen, all it took was one bite and she was running for the nearest garbage.

"That," Chris pointed toward the sink in disgust, "is more than a little stage fright."

"I know. I know." Haley sighed in defeat, plopping herself down on the sofa. At first Haley had assumed it was the food, maybe the heat combined with post-show anxiety. When it started to become a pattern, that's when she began to worry. It was your typical chicken-egg scenario. Was it the nerves that triggered the nausea or the nausea that triggered the nerves? "It's just, seeing Nathan again, it changed everything. I've been second guessing my being here, and nothings been making sense..."

"What do you mean: _not_ making sense? I mean, you've got Chris Keller, baby! What could be better than that?

_Was there anyone on the planet he loved more than himself,_ Haley thought, rolling her eyes. It would be hard to explain how she was feeling to someone so self-absorbed.

"Look, when I was out there on the stage the other night, I couldn't sing...I couldn't hear the music. Nothing. And, then there he was-like a mirage."

"I suppose were talking about Nathan here, not me..." He interrupted, casually as if he were bored with her train of thought.

"Chris!" Haley shouted back at him. "I'm serious..."

"Alright, alright...I'm listening."

"Thank you," she huffed, trying to remember the last thing she'd said. "So, yea...anyways, I took one look at him, _Nathan_-in case you've forgotten already-and it was like my voice and everything I love about music came rushing back. That was the moment when I knew none of it would ever be enough without him. All of the celebrity and all of the applause and all the pretty melodies couldn't fill that void in my heart. Now, he's gone and I'm here and..."

_**...Love is so close to hurting,  
With a shake we could awake from our own dreaming.  
So we must make a vow.  
Cause I have waited a lifetime,  
Now is the right time...**_

"Listen, I've never claimed to be great at giving advice, but..."

"Wait." She stopped him mid-sentence. "Are you saying there _is_ something you aren't the best at?" She gasped, sarcastically. "Impossible."

"Yea, yea...but I make up for it in other ways, if you know what I mean." He gave her a suggestive wink.

"Gross. You would go there." He just smiled glibly at her accusation. "Get on with this sub-par advice you seem intent on sharing."

"Do you know why you're here? Why I picked you? He asked bluntly. "It's because you're an amazing singer, and I thought you deserved to have this once in a lifetime chance. Being here...living this dream..._no one_ can _ever_ take that experience from you. But, if you're not happy, it's just not worth it. I know you love this. It's in you. I knew that the first time I heard you sing." He paused to let that sink in, but when he didn't get a reaction from Haley, he continued. "What you have to do is ask yourself one simple question: was there ever a moment when you loved this more than you love him?"

"No." Haley confessed, a tear rolling down her cheek. "Never."

"Then, I think you just found your answer."

"Chris Keller, I never thought I'd be saying this but...I think I'm going to take your advice."

...

Perhaps it was the sparkle in her eyes, capturing the amber light of the fireplace, that made it all so clear. Or, maybe it was the solitude of having the cabin all to themselves. Whichever way, this particular night was one that neither Brooke, nor Lucas, would ever forget.

_**...Like a bird owns its wing,  
Like a song belongs to melody,  
You belong to me...**_

It wasn't dramatic or theatrical-no confetti flying down, no cookie dough fight, no near-death confession-it was simply perfect being perfectly simple. Two lovers, a shared smile, the same heart...one leather chair. Most of the time love doesn't really need words.

_**...I fold your arms around me,  
Let your flesh, your breath, your love surround me...  
**_

"So, pretty girl, what are you thinking about?" Lucas asked, thumbing the side of her face as he gently tucked the stray piece of hair back into place.

"Just how happy I am..." Brooke sighed, nuzzling into his chest.

"Yea, me too."

"This place _is_ pretty amazing."

"You're glad we came then, even though it's Rachel's? I know you have issues with her."

"Of course. I'm with you, aren't I" she said, while poking his nose playfully, "and she's not."

Lucas laughed after hearing her rationalization. Trust Brooke to say it like it was. He smiled and kissed her forehead.

"Besides," Brooke chimed in, a smirk curling up on her lips. "The red-headed slut and I came to an understanding the other day."

"Wow, really?" Lucas coughed. "I definitely wasn't expecting that."

"Don't get me wrong, I still want to rip her throat out most of the time, but she's not _all_ bad. I have to admit, she's got some killer dance moves."

"Well...that's a start." Lucas chuckled. "Sounds like Bring It On V just found two new stars."

"Yea, and you should talk. You and Nathan...totally Lifetime Original."

"Point taken. Now what do you say we take advantage of having this place all to ourselves?"

"Ohm. I like the way you think, _boyfriend_. There's a hot tub out back..."

...

Tree Hill wasn't a huge city like Chicago or New York, but it still managed somehow to mask the true beauty of a night sky. Being miles away from civilization, though, the sky that night was an open canvas, much like their relationship. After waiting weeks for the perfect moment-both of them wanted to do it right this go around-Brooke and Lucas made love for the first time. In a way it was an indication of how far they had come; as if it were written in the stars. Unfortunately, before they knew it, their time at the cabin had flown by, and home was calling them back to reality.

...

The day of the state championship had finally arrived and, as usual, Brooke had taken it upon herself to prepare the gym for its upcoming festivities. She figured that it was the least she could do to show support for her two favorite Ravens: Lucas and Nathan. It was especially important for her to do this for Nate. Even if their relationship was struggling right now, she wanted him to know that she cared. They had been through way too much together to just throw that friendship away because they didn't want to deal with the repercussions of a single night's carelessness. Ever since the Boy Toy Auction, they had been slowly pulling away from each other. At this point, they barely spoke to one another unless it was absolutely necessary. Sooner or later, though, they would have to face up to that mistake, move on and rebuild.

Tonight, however, would not be that night. Brooke knew how important this game was for him. Duke University would be there to solidify his verbal commitment, and in winning he had the chance to surpass his father once and for all. There was no sense in complicating his life any further before he took the court. What he needed was support. Besides, it wasn't like a few more hours of denial would kill anyone. Tomorrow was always another day.

...

With only ten seconds left in the fourth quarter, the Tree Hill Raven's trailed by two points. One shot separated Nathan Scott and his father-living in Dan's legend or becoming legend-and it was all in his hands. 5, 4, 3, 2-and then he saw her, standing on the sidelines, suitcase and guitar in hand. Haley was home.

_**...Oh, you feel like home.  
Love, do not make a sound,  
Nothing to me now,  
Two become one...  
**_

Between the echoes of the buzzer, the cheers from his teammates and the roar of the crowd, she was the only thing that registered. He no longer needed his father's approval. This was his life, his future. With a quick wave and smile, she had given him the courage to step outside himself and make the winning shot.

_**...Love, let's make time stand still,  
Let this moment last until  
Two become one...Become one...**_

As he made his way towards her, fighting off the crowd of fans wanting to congratulate him, he had that feeling; the stillness he used to feel before dawn. The feeling that the world could be perfect. All he wanted to do was hold her again.

Life, as it turns out, isn't perfect and it's not often that we get exactly what we want. The stillness can be ripped away in the blink of an eye, without warning, in the time it takes someone to pull the trigger on a gun. For Nathan and Haley that's exactly how long it took.

"Haley..." He yelled in despair, trying his best to warn her. "_Nooooooooo_!"

And in that moment the stillness turned to chaos...then, silence.

...

Anthony Robbins once said: "You must know that in any moment a decision you make can change the course of your life forever: the very next person you stand behind in line or sit next to on an airplane, the very next phone call you make or receive, the very next movie you see or book you read or page you turn could be the one single thing that causes the floodgates to open, and all of the things that you've been waiting for to fall into place."

Then again, it can just as easily fall to pieces. You see, everything in life is connected, one way or another. You may have to dig deep to find it, but it's there. The faces in certain places may be different, the words exchanged not verbatim, but the situation...it's the same. And that's irony; the hidden factor that creeps around us in life, letting it's presence be known only after it has left. Think back to a year ago, two years ago, even ten years ago. Picture the situation you were in. Notice, things are different yet, by some means, everything is still in some way alike. Everything connects together to form the balance of life, to maintain structure. Change is and always will be inevitable, but everything is relative, and all the moments and times in your life will come back around again, you just might find yourself on the other side of the coin..."

Which side the coin lands on-who wins and who loses-that is the real turning point. So, maybe Chuck Palahniuk is right: "The unreal is more powerful than the real." It's true, "nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it...it's only intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. Stone crumbles. Wood rots. People, well, they die. But, things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on."

* * *

**Lyrics from this chapter are from Two Become One, by Jewel.**

**A/N: Okay, so I know that was shorter than my usual, but as I said I'm trying to wrap up the backstory. There is still plenty in the present that needs telling. The next chapter will be from Nathan's POV, the following (present) will jump back and forth. Hope you liked this chapter, I wanted to take my stab at Leyton-I know I'm terrible-and also plant the necessary seeds. Without a beta, I'll admit, I've been struggling a bit with this story. Help me out and let me know what you think-the more pseudo beta's the better! Thanks everyone!**


	20. Joke's On You

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters, etc. those belong to the CW and Mark Schwann, who effectively ruined them!

A/N: Apologies to all those who've stuck with this story and been disappointed in my lackluster updates. I've had a ton going on, but that's no excuse. Hopefully, you won't hold it against me too much and continue reading and reviewing. I've been going back and forth with the ending and how I want to wrap it up. This is the last chapter explaining the back story, but it's set in present time. The epilogue will take back up a few months later. I'll provide a few spoilers for that at the end of this chapter. Hope you like it!

* * *

**Joke's On You**

_**...Riding on a unicorn  
Stranded in my mind...  
**_

In that moment the stillness had turned to chaos...and then, silence took up residency. Despite Nathan's mental pleas and desperate resolve, what had been done had been done, and there was no amount of arguing that would change it.

_**...Electric raven met me there  
To see what we could find...**_

2,763,360 minutes...46,056 hours...1919 days. No matter how you looked at it, the end result was always the same. Nathan Scott was trapped; stranded in some sort of perverse time trap for a grand total of 5 years, 3 months and two days.

_**...Strange days  
Incredible days  
Bring all my children to me  
Strange ways  
Incredible ways  
On a dark stars endless journey...**_

_When you're basically dead but not really dead - just comatose and stripped of all the real connections you once knew - you see the world in a different light. You have time to count the precious minutes you've lost and wonder what might have been. Regret. Denial. Fear. Desperation. Blame. They'll all take over at one point or another, and you are helpless to all of them. _

_If you're real lucky - and by lucky, I mean the kind where you're in the wrong place at the wrong time - you'll get front row seats to the freak show that was once your life. That's what happened to me, and in my case the freak show I left was only half what it would come to be. When all was said and done, no matter how hard Lucas and I tried to distance ourselves from repeating Dan's mistakes, we couldn't get away from it. It's true...history does repeat itself. And, I guess in the end the joke was on me. _

_**...Endless realms of fading dreams  
Lies stranded with the past...**_

_I lost the first 24 hours, that's still a blur even now. I remember looking at Haley, seeing the gun, pushing her out of the way and then...it was all black. Of course, since then I've had the fun of putting all the puzzle pieces back together. You'd be surprised - or maybe you wouldn't be - how much people share when they think the person they're talking to can't hear them. Honestly, even the doctors, "professionals" that they say they are, lower their guard. All that confidentiality bullshit you hear them preach time and time again...down the drain. At this point, I probably know the most out of anyone. Yea, that's right. The guy in a coma! That's Tree Hill for ya, but that's also all about to change._

...

Haley pulled out her chair and looked into Brooke's eyes, standing up as if it would help her gain composure. She'd been waiting for this moment anxiously - letting her fears and imagination get the best of her - all these years. There wasn't a chance in hell she'd let this opportunity pass her by. Trust be told, there were alot of things Haley James had sacrificed over the years, but this would not be one of them. _No time like the present, right? _She thought to herself, taking one last deep breath.

"Your daughter..." She choked out. There was no going back now. She'd practiced in front of the mirror, in the shower, in the car on her way to work; the dress rehearsals for this moment seemed endless but nothing could have prepared her. How do you prepare for something like this? It goes against every rational fiber in your body. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you look at it, Brooke was at the same breaking point. So it was. With the slightest of nods she affirmed the very thing she knew Haley feared; the same thing that'd haunted her for the better part of their young adulthood.

"She's Nathan's." Brooke confirmed, somberly. "I found out a couple weeks after he was shot."

And just like that, the room was silent.

"So, when you passed out..." Haley thought out loud, remembering it as if were just yesterday. Back then, between the chaos and bloodshed, no one thought to question it. They'd all assumed it was stress, and quite frankly too caught up in their own drama to notice.

"I didn't believe it." Brooke whispered, shaking her head just as she'd done that day. "When the doctor told me how far along I was...I kept telling myself it couldn't be true, that I would have known. How could I _not_ have known?" Haley scoffed at the hypothetical question, forcing Brook to hold up her hand up in defense. "Please," the once carefree brunette begged, hopelessly trying to regain control over her emotions. "This isn't easy."

"Easy?" Haley cut her off, indignantly. "You think this is easy for me? What about Lucas? _You_ just up and left! He's been a miserable sack of shit for 5 years now because of _you_! And you expect me to take it easy on you? Like hell."

"Excuse me?" Brooke spout back furiously. It was one thing for Haley to be pissed about the whole Natalie/Nathan situation. That was expected. It was another thing for her, of all people, to be chastising Brooke for leaving Tree Hill and Lucas. _What a hypocrite_, she thought. "Listen, I don't _expect_ anything from you, and I sure as hell don't have to explain myself. You don't know the half of it! I don't know what Lucas has told you, but it wasn't like that." She defended, trying to leave it at that.

"So, what _was_ it like?" Haley goaded, despite her better judgment. "Tell me, please. Enlighten me as to how you could sleep with your boyfriend's brother, parade around like nothing happened, find out you're pregnant with said boyfriend's brother's child, lie to everyone's face...and just leave! How was it _not_ like that, Brooke?"

She knew the road they were about to head down wasn't pretty and normally would have avoided it at all cost, but Haley had no intention of honoring those wishes. As much as Brooke wanted to leave this subject alone, there was no way she could let Haley go on making unwarranted accusations like that.

"First of all, _you..." _she practically snarled, pointing in Haley's general direction, "_you_ are the last person who should talk about leaving. You practically wrote the book on it! You and Lucas both. And, for the record, he and I weren't together when it happened and neither were you and Nathan! If I remember correctly, at the time Lucas was off playing daddy with Rachel, and you were on national television chumming it up with that asshat Keller. Nathan and I made a mistake! It wasn't the first and guess what...it wasn't the last! So what? Is that was this is really about? We're not perfect like the two of you? I mean, does that really surprise you?" Brooke paused for a moment, waiting to see if Haley would respond. "Didn't think so. All these years, and you never could admit when you were wrong."

"That's not true." Haley argued half-heartedly.

"Yes it is." Brooke sighed, shaking her head in disbelief. "But it's beside the point. Nathan and I made a mistake, a truly horrible and unfortunate mistake, and we paid for it. Would I take it all back if I could? Maybe. I'd do it in a heartbeat, if it meant I could have that life back, if we could _all_ have that life back. But it wouldn't, Haley...it wouldn't, and deep down you know that." By now Brooke had tears rimming her eyes. There was once a time when she wouldn't have even blinked if someone had insinuated she was a cold-hearted bitch, but that person didn't exist anymore. She hadn't been that girl for a long time, and what stung the most was how easily people forgot that. "Look, you and Lucas weren't the only ones who lost someone that night," she lamented. "I lost my best friend, _again_, and eventually I lost the love of my life too. So, forgive me for so selfishly wanting to hold onto the only thing I did have!"

Haley closed her eyes, stunned, embarrassed and speechless at how callous she'd been.

"Listen," Brooke continued, "I won't claim to know or even want to understand the how or why behind what happened, because I don't. What I do know is that the one remotely positive thing that came out of all this was Natalie, and if it weren't for that "mistake," I wouldn't have her. At the time I was terrified to admit that. Maybe on some level I still am.

"I'm sorry, Brooke" was all Haley could manage.

"Don't be." Brooke replied curtly, reaching behind the chair to grab her jacket and purse. She'd had enough for one night...enough for a lifetime, really. "I don't want your pity. I never have."

"Brooke, wait." Haley sighed, a last ditch effort to keep her old friend from walking away forever. "What's the real reason you left?"

Confused by the question Brooke looked back. "What do you mean? You know why I left."

"Not really. I mean, I know what Lucas has told me. Though, I'll admit that part has always been a bit fuzzy. And, I understand the situation you were in and with what happened - everyone wanted to get away after that, myself included. I guess I just don't understand, that's all. I'm not saying you're not happy now, or that the decision you made was wrong...I just, you had to have known that Lucas would be there for you if he'd known...for you and the baby. So, why didn't you tell him? What _really_ happened between you and Lucas?"

Brooke smiled sadly, setting her purse back on the chair for the moment. "He blamed me," she said simply, trying to fight off the bitter memory of that time.

"For what?"

"For Nathan, for Keith...for everything. You said so yourself, he was miserable. Thing is, he was miserable long before I left. I tried anything I could think of but it only seemed to make it worse, and no matter what I did or said he only shut me out more. I knew that if I told him the truth he'd do the right things and say the right things. It's Lucas; he may have even offered to marry me or something equally as moronic. That's him, and that's exactly why I didn't tell him."

"So instead you told him that you stopped loving him?" Haley asked, confused by what she'd heard from Lucas all these years and what Brooke was telling her now.

"No." Brooke refuted, adamantly, too stunned by Haley's assumption to say anything else at first. "I told him that I loved him, and probably always would. But, you have to understand, we went days without meaningful conversation, and I missed him like hell at first, but it didn't seem like he missed me at all. After a while, I had to start thinking about what was best for me...and, Natalie. So when I got the internship offer in New York I took it. I made a deal with the devil, my mother, and the rest is history." She paused for a moment, trying to think of the best way to put it. "Put it this way, Hales...I gave him a way out and he took it. I told him I'd stopped _missing_ him, not _loving_ him, and it broke my heart to even say that much."

"So what did he say?" Haley asked. "You can't tell me Lucas just let you walk away without atleast attempting some grand gesture or platitude."

"That's just it. He didn't even try to stop me. He just let me walk right on out of that house and out of his life without a single word. That says alot about a guy who prides himself on being a writer."

Brooke, reminding herself that what happened between her and Lucas was water under the bridge, took advantage of Haley's astonished silence. "Alright, Miss 21-questions, that's enough talking about me for one night. It's my turn to ask you something."

"And that would be?"

"Well," Brooke cocked her eyebrow as she often did, "I wanna know what happened to the Haley James I knew...rockstar extraordinaire, remember her?"

"Umm." Haley stammered, trying to evade the topic all together. "She retired?"

"Yea, I heard about that." Brooke teased. "You're a nurse now? That hardly seems like a fair trade."

"Maybe it's not supposed to be." Haley looked away from Brooke's gaze. "Talk about unfair. How could I go on living my dream after what happened to Nathan? Besides, none of it mattered without him anyways."

"What do you mean none of it mattered? You loved music."

_I loved him more_, Haley wanted to say, but thought better of it. "Look, I know you think I'm incapable of admitting wrong-doing; and, given my unwarranted display of self-righteousness earlier, I don't blame you. That doesn't mean I don't have regrets though, because I do. When I look back on the tour, sure there were some amazing moments, but I'm not proud of it or anything because..."

"Because what?" Brooke pried.

"Because _he_ wasn't proud of me, alright. There I said it. End of story."

"Are you insane?" Brooke balked, throwing caution to the wind. She needed to hear this whether she wanted to or not. "He loved you, Haley. He wanted that for you, and I know without a doubt, he was proud of you...always."

_...And forever. _Haley instinctively added to herself. "I'd like to believe you."

Brooke smirked, picked up her car keys and headed towards the door with the look of pure determination all over her face.

"Where are you going?" Haley shouted, but by then Brooke was already out the door. A minute later she reappeared at the door with a tattered box in her hands.

"Here." Brooke explained breathlessly, as she placed the box on the table and pushed it forward. "You don't have to take my word for it. It's all there."

"What is this?" Haley asked, nervously. This whole scenario seemed a bit too Pandora's box for her liking.

"Well, look in it and find out!"

"Fine." Haley gave in and started to sift through the hundreds of newspaper and magazine clippings that filled the box. "There's gotta be over a hundred articles in here. Who took the time to find all these? I've never even seen half of them."

"Someone who was really proud of you."

_**...We climb up on the wind of change  
We say "You know the joke's on you"...**_

Haley let that sink in for a moment. "You're saying Nathan did this? But..."

"He was hurt, Haley, but that doesn't mean he wasn't proud of you. Every day..."

"Stop." Now it was Haley's turn to put up her hand, unable to hold back the guilt and pain she'd been carrying around. For all these years she'd tried to hide it. She'd given up music, devoted herself to Jamie; even became a nurse so that she could help people...all because of the guilt. "He shouldn't have needed these, Brooke...he should have had me. I should have been here!"

Brooke gently wrapped her arms around her distraught friend. It'd been a long time since the two of them had shared an embrace like that, but it just seemed right. "You can't blame yourself Hales." She whispered. "And you can't keep punishing yourself for something that wasn't your fault."

"I know." Haley cried. "But, sometimes it's just easier to blame myself than to face the reality that he's not in."

"I know what you mean." Brooke agreed sympathetically. "At some point, though, we're gonna have to let him go...let it all go and move on." Of course that's easier said than done. "I think what the two of us need a _real_ drink."

"Agreed."

...

Lucas shut his laptop and smiled brightly. After countless months - one or two bouts with severe writer's block - his second novel was finally finished. He picked up his phone and started to dial a familiar number but stopped before hitting the send button. _That'll have to wait_, he thought to himself and went back to his phone to dial again.

"Hello, Lucas is that you?" The woman on the other end of the phone asked. "I can barely hear you."

"Yea, Linds it's me. I'm done. I mean, _it's_ done. The manuscript. I'm sending it to you right now."

"Oh my gosh, Lucas... you finished The Red Door, that's great!" She exhaled loudly. "I was starting to get worried."

"No need for that. I wouldn't let you down. I know how much you risked taking a chance on me with An Unkindness of Ravens. You changed my life, you know that?"

"That was all you Lucas." She smiled into the phone, and it was almost as if he could feel her sincerity. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, anything."

"The Luke and Brooke from your first novel... "

"No," he admitted, disappointedly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I was rooting for them."

With that the two exchanged good-byes, and Lucas was once again left to his brooding ways.

...

Back at the hotel bar, where Brooke and Haley had taken their "pity party," things had started to shift gears. The bottle of wine they'd each drank in the last hour was definitely doing the trick and loosening the two ladies up.

"So, there's something you should probably know." Haley started to come clean, watching Brooke's reaction as she eyed the small photo of Jamie, Haley, Lucas and Karen. "Jamie isn't Karen's..."

"You and Lucas?" Brooke gasped.

"Gross, no way!"

"Nathan? I didn't even know the two of you, you know."

"Yea. Just once in New York." Haley explained. "I'd come back the night of the championship to tell him."

"So he doesn't know then...about either Natalie or Jamie?"

"Not as far as I know."

"Wow." Brooke stated eventually, sitting back in her seat as Haley followed suit.

"We ought to be on Jerry Springer."

"No, no...we're way classier than that. Maybe Maury?"

At that the two girls couldn't help but laugh. History does have a funny way of repeating itself.

_**...Strange days  
Incredible days...**_

Like Jim Rohn said, "we must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is, discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons." For Haley, Brooke and Lucas, their past had weighed on them for far too long. What they, like most of us, neglect to realize is that letting go does not mean we're giving up...it means we're moving on. Unfortunately, as David Mustaine once sang, "moving on, is a simple thing, what it leaves behind is hard."

* * *

Spoilers: Just a few...as always, people who are meant to be always find a way back to each other in the end. The two-part epilogue will pick up a few months later. Lucas will be touring for his book The Red Door, Brooke will be planning her wedding and Haley will finally get back in the saddle, artistically speaking. If you watched OTH through the dreadful seasons 5 and 6 you might have an idea of where this is going, but rest assured it has a happily ever after. Until then!


	21. Crown of Love Part One

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters, etc. those belong to the CW and Mark Schwann, who effectively ruined them!

A/N: Thanks again to all of you who have been here from the beginning. You along with the newbies have reinvigorated my push to get this story out, and I can't thank you enough for that. Here is the first of what will probably turn out to be a 3-part epilogue - post reunion. I hope you continue to enjoy the crazy path that our beloved characters live. As always, please review. It really is like heroin or candy for us writers!

* * *

**Crown of Love - Epilogue Part One**

…_**They say, "it fades if you let it,"**_

_**love was made to forget it.**_

_**I carved your name across my eyelids**_

_**you pray for rain, I pray for blindness...**_

Having known the pair from the beginning, Millie was thrilled when Brooke finally set the date and asked her to be maid of honor. She truly couldn't have been any happier for the two of them, especially Julian. He had stuck by Brooke's side through thick and thin, accepted her pain as his own and loved her despite it all. As far as she was concerned, there wasn't another man more deserving of Brooke's hand, and heart, than Julian.

"It's beautiful, Brooke." Millie gasped, watching her friend gracefully twirl around as she modeled her latest and most momentous piece to date - her wedding gown. They were entering the final stretch here; in a week's time she'd walk down the aisle and become Mrs. Julian Baker.

"Something is off. Maybe if I add an extra layer of chiffon to the train?" Brooke was musing aloud when the door sprung open and a certain fiery red head walked in.

"You look good, slut." She greeted, nonchalantly, plopping down on the tiny settee and opening up a bag of McDonald's.

Brooke laughed as she made her way over to her friend's side. "You don't look too bad yourself, whore, which is surprising given your meal of choice these days."

"Bitch, I was just on an airplane for the last four hours sitting next to a screaming baby and a bald, smelly, fat man. _Why?_ Because my spoiled little brat of a friend had to push up her dress fitting to go on a surprise, pre-honeymoon trip to Sundance with her fiancé? Yea, I think I'm entitled to splurge after that. Besides, I'm not the one squeezing my ass into a couture wedding gown, now am I?"

"Oh no you didn't just say that!" Brooke cried out as the two sprang forward into a faux fight of sorts. "Take it back or else!"

Rachel let out a hearty chuckle at that one. "Okay, okay...you win," Rachel conceded, despite knowing full well that Brooke never really had a chance. For a girl that'd never had a brother, Rachel sure knew how to throw down, and in real fight to the death, Brooke would be no match. "You know you look perfect as always."

"That's better." The perky brunette replied with her nose turned up in dramatic fashion. "Now shut up, wash that grease off your hands and go try on your dress!"

_That was Brooke and Rachel for ya_, Millie thought. _Never a dull moment between the two of them_. To be honest, she'd never really understood their friendship, much less personally cared for the girl, but Brooke had insisted Rachel be included in the wedding. All in all, it really hadn't been that bad. Rachel stayed in New York most of the time anyways, running the store there, and Millie was busy running the store in LA. Having those 2,000 plus miles in between them was definitely good for morale.

"_So_...what do you think, Millie?" Brooke whined, pacing around the room somewhat hysterically. "Should I add an extra layer of ruffles? Maybe lower the back a bit? More rhinestones, less rhinestones? I don't know what to do! I really thought this was going to be it..."

"Hunny, hunny...sit down." Millie cooed, as she grabbed her friend and helped her over to the couch. "You're starting to scare me a little bit, so just sit tight and try to relax. I'm gonna go grab you a glass of ice water, okay? I'll be right back."

...

For the past few months Lucas had been traveling the country with Lindsey promoting his latest novel, "The Red Door." All the long hours had started to take a toll on the two blondes, so Luke insisted they take a day off to just enjoy themselves.

Since embarking on the tour, Lucas and Lindsey's relationship had shifted from strictly business to being pretty good friends. They'd shared quite a bit with each other, though in Luke's case it kind of came with the territory, given his first story was somewhat autobiographical. So it was really when Lindsey opened up about her dad's losing battle with cancer and her mom's subsequent depression that they'd truly become friends.

_**...If you still want me, please forgive me**_

_**the crown of love has fallen from me...**_

On this particular day they happened to be in Los Angeles; a mere block away from Brooke's store. It was a gorgeous day, not uncommon for the area, with the sun shining brightly and not a cloud in sight. Still, for Lucas, being there was bittersweet. Everywhere he looked there seemed to be news of the pending nuptials between Brooke and her hotshot, music producer fiancé, Julian Baker. _I mean what kind of name is Julian anyway?_ Lucas thought. _It sounds like a bad Antonio Banderas character._

"Can I ask you something?" Lindsey broke him out of his silent reverie. Lucas nodded. "And be honest. If Brooke had decided to stay in Tree Hill after the reunion, after you'd found out about the whole situation with her daughter, would you honestly have been able to forgive her for that? I mean, she slept with your _brother_ of all people."

Lucas thought about that for a moment; he had never considered what he would have done in that situation before, because he never had to. Brooke didn't stay.

"Ya, I guess I would have." He finally said, confidently. "Thing is, I'd already forgiven her for that - albeit unknowingly - before we'd gotten back together in New York. My forgiveness wasn't conditional back then, and neither was how I felt about her." Lucas sighed, remembering the horrible weeks after Dante went ballistic at the championship game and he'd gone on a rampage trying to uncover the truth.

Foolish as it may have been, at the time it was like he had been possessed, trying to fix things...wanting to turn back time and bring Keith back to his mom, Nathan back to Haley and hope back to him. He'd later found out that it was Dan's gambling that'd gotten them into the whole mess in the first place - he'd ordered Nathan to throw the game and he probably would have if not for Haley walking in at that very moment - but none of that mattered now.

"I wasn't myself after that night." Lucas muttered, half to himself, half to Lindsey. "I was so consumed with guilt...I was lost, and I was even more lost when she left, but I don't blame her for leaving or from keeping that part of her life from me. She was right; I never let her all the way in, and I didn't stop her from leaving when I had the chance. I wanted to, believe me I did, I just could never find the right way to do it. And then, it was too late."

Lindsey sat up straighter, shocked at his last statement. "It's _never_ too late." She reminded him of his own words, while picking up his novel and opening it to the page she wanted. After a quick glance, she'd found the particular excerpt she wanted and started reading.

_"It was more than just a red door because of what it brought to his life: direction, beauty, meaning. There are many who couldn't understand, and sometimes he walked among them. But even in his darkest hours, he knew in his heart that someday it would return to him, and his world would be whole again... And his belief in God and love and art would be re-awakened in his heart."_

"What happened to _this_ guy, Luke? She asked, closing the book and looking directly at him. "You should go to see her."

"Linds, it's just a story." Lucas grunted, as he downed another glass of Pinot Noir. "She made her choice, and now I have to let her go. I mean, my mom always said that people who are meant to be together always find their way back in the end, but maybe we just aren't meant to be together like I've always thought."

"I'm sorry, Luke. I really am." Lindsey grabbed her purse to leave, sensing he needed to be alone.

After brooding for few moments, Lucas snapped out of it and walked up to his editor, who was standing with her hand on the doorknob, ready to leave. "Hey, why don't you hang out and have a few drinks with me?" He suggested. "You know, take my mind off of it."

Lindsey started to tease him that he'd probably already had enough to drink but thought better of it once she saw the pain in his eyes. "Sure. I'll grab another bottle of wine," she said before slipping out of the room.

Once back in the room, Lindsey poured the two of them fresh glasses before sitting down next to Lucas. "For the record," she told him, "I think she made the wrong choice."

...

As much as Millie loved, looked up to and at times even envied Brooke, she couldn't ignore the fact that maybe something else was going on here...something outside of the designer's usual neurotic behavior, something beyond simple pre-wedding jitters. Maybe it wasn't the dress that was the problem at all; maybe it was her.

_**...If you still want me, please forgive me**_

_**Because the spark is not within me**_

_**I snuffed it out before my mom walked in my bedroom...**_

"Are you feeling any better?" Millie asked as she handed over the ice water.

"A little." Brooke replied meekly. "I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I mean, I know they always say that the bride doesn't know what she wants until she finds it, and that more often than not the dress they end up choosing is something completely different than the one they had in mind. It's just, I thought I'd be different, you know? I've had my dream dress, this dress, designed for as long as I can remember. It never changed. No matter how many times I pictured myself walking down the aisle, it never changed. And now, looking at myself in the mirror, something's off, and I don't know what it is."

By then Rachel had returned from the other room and joined the two women in front of the mirror.

"Brooke," Millie spoke softly, not wanting to upset her friend. "I know you don't want to hear this now, but have you ever thought that maybe it's not the dress that's off? Could it be that this is your heart's way of saying, "don't go through with this?"

"Why would it be telling me not to go through with it? I love Julian." Brooke stated back, matter of factly.

"And, I don't doubt that."

"So what are you saying then?"

"She's saying you're an idiot!" Rachel blurted out.

"I never said that!" Millie protested.

"Oh, please. Save it, Miley"

"For the one-thousandth time...it's Millie!"

"Whatever." Rachel dismissed her friend's loyal, yet naive, assistant and turned her attention back to Brooke. "Listen up, skank, I'm only saying this once. You can't marry Julian."

"What the hell is wrong with you two?" Brooke shouted back. "I'm about to walk down the aisle in less than a week and _now_ you're coming at me with this? What's the point? Do you _not_ want me to be happy?"

"Of course we want you to be happy." Millie and Rachel responded in unison, both eyeing each other suspiciously.

"Let me take care of this." Rachel declared, with such unwavering confidence that Millie didn't question it. "Brooke, do you remember what you said when I asked you who you wanted standing next to you when all your dreams came true?" Rachel paused briefly to allow her hypothetical question to sink in. "_Lucas._ You said Lucas, and I don't doubt that you've imagined yourself walking down the aisle a million times in the exact same dress you're wearing now. The only difference is that it's not Julian waiting for you at the altar now is it? It's Lucas. It's always been Lucas. You have to talk to him Brooke."

"No, I don't." Brooke finally responded, but the strain in her voice betrayed the tough exterior she'd been putting up. "What I have to do is go. Julian is picking me up for the airport at 7:30, and I'm nowhere near packed. The two of you are supposed to be here to support me. So support me!"

"Fine, I won't say another word, but do me a favor," Rachel held out her arm to stop Brooke from leaving. After fishing through her purse she pulled out a book and handed it to Brooke with one last request. "Before you go off and make the biggest mistake of your life...read this."

...

Brooke sat on her red velvet couch waiting for Julian to come get her. He was running a tad late, so she'd begrudgingly decided to take Rachel's advice and read Lucas's latest novel. The title alone was enough to hold her back from reading any further. Instead she tossed the book onto her suitcase and headed for the bathroom.

_**...The only thing that you keep changing**_

_**Is your name, my love keeps growing**_

_**Still the same, just like a cancer**_

_**And you won't give me a straight answer...**_

When she got back, Julian was standing in her living room, one hand clutching Lucas's book, the other barely touching her suitcase.

"Well, I think I found the problem…" He greeted her, abruptly, holding the book out at her as if it were evidence.

"What do you mean?" She grabbed it from him and instinctively tucked it against her body. "I thought I'd bring it on the plane to read. Is that a crime?"

"What? For the thousandth time?"

"This is a new one. I haven't read it yet." Brooke explained, not yet understanding why Julian was so upset.

"Great." He rolled his eyes, talking in his high pitched sarcastic voice. "Now there are two of them."

"It's not a big deal…"

"No. It is a big deal, Brooke."

"They're just books!"

"Exactly. And, you don't even like reading!" Julian moved toward the bedroom. Knowing exactly what he was looking for, it didn't take him long to find it. "So why do you continue to buy copies of this thing...every damn time you see it?" He picked up Lucas's first book and tossed it in her direction. "It sits on the nightstand half the time, _our_ nightstand for god's sake. You think it's lost on me that it's written by your ex-boyfriend?"

"Julian, it's not like that. It's just important to me."

"No. You know what, I'm tired of this," he said, grabbing Lucas's second book out of Brooke's arms. "Here," he started reading from the back of the book: "the boy saw the red door and he felt as though his life had meaning."

"Ok."

"The boy saw the red door and he felt as though his life had meaning. And when the door was taken away from him, he spent his entire life searching, hoping, waiting for it to come back to him." Julian paused and looked up for a moment. There was a sadness in his eyes that Brooke had never seen before. "There won't ever come a day when I'm not sharing you with Lucas Scott, will there?" He asked, dejectedly, praying that the woman he loved would say something, do something, to prove him wrong. But, she didn't, and it was in that moment that he experienced the worst kind of epiphany. "I think I just got my answer."

"Wait!" Brooke called after him. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to Sundance. Alone. That is unless you wanna go with the book? Because if that's the case, be my guest. Get a nice suite, go skiing, cozy up by the fire, and talk about your future together. I really hope both of you are very happy."

"Julian this is crazy! You're acting like a child. I love you!"

"I love you too, Brooke, I do and I always will. But the man has written two books, two _novels_ about his love for you! I can't compete with that, and I don't want to. No matter what I do, it's always gonna be there: "you and him" not "you and me." I think I've always known it, deep down, I just never wanted to believe it."

"They're just stories, Julian."

"No, it's _your_ story, and it's obviously not finished. Don't you get that? I can't keep waiting around for our story to begin when in your heart you're still holding onto him. Goodbye, Brooke." He whispered, as he gently kissed her forehead.

Brooke stood motionless as Julian walked out of her apartment and out of her life. He was right. As much as she didn't want to admit it, she had been lying to herself and that wasn't fair to either of them. She felt sick to her stomach, and a little too much like Reese Witherspoon's character in Sweet Home Alabama. All she'd ever wanted was to be able to recreate the happiness and love she'd shared with Lucas. But that was the problem. It didn't matter how great Julian was - he had done everything right, just like Andrew - or how much they loved each other. He wasn't Lucas. Plain and simple.

Feeling more vulnerable than she'd ever felt before, Brooke wept for all the loss she'd been burying inside. After the last tear had fallen, she picked up the book once more. This time reading it in its entirety. It was a beautiful story, one that she desperately wanted to believe in. She couldn't help but think back to the time when she'd been in his world; a time when she'd been his world and never happier. Even with all her success, she hadn't been truly happy, or fulfilled, since she'd left Tree Hill.

_Maybe it's time I went back_, she thought. _This time…for good_.

…

Back in Tree Hill, Haley sat by the piano and plugged away at a new melody. Ever since Brooke came to town back in May she'd been slowly trying to get back into the swing of things. It felt good to get back in the saddle, but there was still that huge part missing…Nathan.

…_**If you still want me, please forgive me**_

_**The crown of love has fallen from me**_

_**If you still want me, please forgive me**_

_**Because your hands are not upon me**_

_**I shrugged them off before my mom walked in my bedroom…**_

It'd been hard juggling her full time job at the hospital, taking care of Jamie and now adding music on top of that. Fewer and fewer nights, she'd managed to sneak in to see Nathan, and it broke her heart to acknowledge that. It was just like in high school. To have one felt like she had to give up on the other.

Just as she'd put the sheet paper down and started to play, the phone rang from the kitchen. It was weird to hear the actual phone ring. Lucas and Karen always called her cell, the hospital would page her and Jamie's school, well they don't exactly know that he's her son, so they don't call period. Besides the occasional telemarketer, no one really called on that line. It wasn't until she heard "cellular caller" coming from the I.D. that she'd even considered not letting it go to voicemail.

Having picked up on the last ring, she answered a bit breathlessly. "Hello? Can I help you?"

"Haley, it's Brooke. How are you?"

"Oh, Brooke, hey…sorry, you caught me off guard. I feel like hardly anyone calls me at this number anymore." She explained, laughing nervously. They hadn't really talked much since she'd last been in Tree Hill.

"Yea, I'd meant to get your new cell number the last time I was in town, but it slipped my mind with everything else going on. I hope it's not a problem me calling. It must be pretty late there. I didn't think about the time difference."

"No, it's fine, Brooke. What is it that you needed to talk to me about?"

"Well, the hospital's been calling me a lot lately. Millie, my assistant, has been able to hold them off for a while, telling them I'm traveling, but I'm going to have to call them back sooner or later. I have a pretty good idea what they want to discuss."

"They want to know when they can pull the plug on Nathan." Haley interjected, knowingly. She'd overheard one of the doctors talking about it the other day. Apparently, just prior to the accident, Nathan had given Brooke power of attorney rights in the event that he was not able to decide himself. Knowing the situation, it made sense. At the time, his mother was still in and out of rehab, his father was a complete jerk-wad and she'd regrettably been away on tour. In the end, that decision probably saved his life. No one else would have had the means to keep him on life support for so long or the resources to stand up to Dan Scott in court when he'd petitioned for his rights. So, as much as it burned her up inside, knowing that she didn't have that control, she was also incredibly grateful.

"Look, Haley, I know this isn't something we need to decide right now, but I could really use your help with this one." Brooke swallowed hard. "You know a lot more about his condition and what we're dealing with than I do. I'd like you to be there when I talk to the doctor."

"Brooke, I'm not sure if…"

"Please, Haley."

"Okay. I'll be there. When is the meeting?"

"Well, I haven't exactly set up an appointment yet, but I was thinking maybe Thursday?"

"Thursday, as in this Thursday, five days from now?"

"Is that too soon for you?"

"No, that's fine with me. It's just, aren't you getting married next weekend?"

"Oh, yea about that." Brooke sighed. "Wedding's off."

Haley spit out the water she was drinking. "What? I'm so sorry, Brooke."

"I'm okay. It was for the best really, we just weren't meant to be." Brooke held back a tiny, yet hopeful, smile.

"So what are you gonna do now?"

"Funny that you ask. I thought I'd take on a new market with Clothes Over Bros; one with _less _drama and scandal than Los Angeles. You know, like Tree Hill." They both laughed at the irony.

"So, you're coming home then?"

"Yea, we're coming home." Brooke repeated before they said their goodbyes.

_Home_, she thought to herself. _I like the sound of that._

* * *

A/N: We're getting there. Slowly but surely! Part Two picks up with Brooke's return to Tree Hill. Finally! XOXO


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